This is my first story. It is long but I would like to think that to every old submissive male that it may give hope that there are genuine Dominatrix Females out there. Don't give up hope. 

A little about me. I'm well over 50 and in my second marriage. Sex has all but stopped and is certainly very vanilla when it occurs, we have three grown-up sons. I'm submissive and cross-dress at every opportunity. Wife does not know and would be horrified if she found out. Visited my first paid dominatrix when I was 18 and knew at that point, despite the very tame play, that I was a sub -She placed me in stockings, a nappy (although nappy play was not for me) and very, very lightly whipped my back. But as is the way with so many who say they are dominatrix, it really was very mild and ended in sex, presumably as that is what most of her clients want. In the intervening years, I have been able to play from time to time, including from this site with 696969a who once had me undertake serving a meal and doing her ironing for her and three of her female friends- a nice level of humiliation as I was in a bra and stockings and 6" heels (I do miss the heels) but lacked the pain and suffering, although more than one woman being present was very exciting. I'm a heavy user of bdsm porn, you know the sort of thing, heavy latex, restraints, breathing control, poppers through tubes/ valves, extreme electrical and of course strap-ons/ anal beads/ fisting etc. and although I consider myself as straight, the idea of taking cock is a real turn-on. Over the years I have had a few experiences, some have been strong on the humiliation aspect, one on the pain but none were the complete package and fairly rushed and so mostly I have been on my own with porn, a tens machine and stockings etc. when the time and family being elsewhere, have allowed. 

Which takes me to recent events, when I began again to crave the need for someone to really use me, degrade me and make me suffer. I reached out to a Dominatrix in the next town and we exchanged emails. There was a noticeable difference from most other 'Doms', in that the emails read that the Dominatrix, (I will call her Miss D) came across as very genuine and either a lifestyle Dominatrix or at least someone who genuinely enjoyed the lifestyle and was not merely undertaking appointments for other reasons/ financial. We set a date and I arrived, sitting in my car round the corner having arrived early, so as not to be late, nervously playing with my suspender strap under my suit- I had just before leaving the office, been to the toilet and placed on my black basque and stockings under my suit, I had been in chastity cage for two days. I rang the bell at the house, which was discretely located. Miss D opened the door.....a submissive's delight.....all in black, immaculate red lips, perfect dominant hair (some will understand what that means) and devine high heeled boots.....I knew I was right, from the emails exchanged, this was going to be different. 

We entered Miss D's chambers....and I cannot explain, but others may relate, my nervousness instantly left, changing to excitement and eagerness to be exposed and vulnerable in front of Miss D. We chatted a little, Miss D continuing to put me at my ease, listening to my needs confirming my limits and setting a safe word (I realised only later, that I never asked Miss D what she wanted from the session) and then I began to remove my suit, and suddenly the session had began....standing in front of Miss D, naked save for my basque, stockings and chastity. 

You must forgive the inaccuracies in what follows in the re-telling, but slaves and submissives will appreciate that when you are so deep in to submission, you lose all track of a sense of time and details for I was so engrossed in the space of being an object, a toy, a mere plaything, there only for Miss D's amusement. What is retold, is accurate to the best of my recollection. 

For the first part of the session, my hands were cuffed and fixed to ceiling brackets. The noise, the 'clicks' as the tension was taken and then I was slightly stretched through the ratchets on ropes, was simply incredible. Next my legs were similarly bound and fixed to wall brackets and again tension taken through ratchets....and there I was...as I had longed to be for sooooo long......unable to move, exposed, vulnerable and simply helpless. Miss D then fitted me with a ball gag.... which was just the perfect fit....the ball only just fitted in my mouth, fixed behind my head....now helpless, totally vulnerable and mute. Miss D, then very slowly and most exquisitely ran her nails down my shoulders and bum....sending shivers all over, whilst I adjusted to my new bondage. Miss D, told me how pathetic I was and softly laughed, while at times she brushed my back....perhaps with her breasts but being so restrained I cannot know for sure. Miss D whispered in my ear and at times was a mere 1cm from my face, looking directly into my eyes, clearly seeing me, my inner slut, not merely the xdressing bitch which she had helplessly  restrained  before her. If I had not been gagged....I would have felt that I could simply have kissed her, our faces were so close....this is a level of intensity that readers may not understand but the power dynamic between Dom and sub was incredible, yes this was deeply physical (without any touch) but so clearly based upon her mental as well as physical dominance. All of this, I think was before even a single lash of a whip was delivered. Miss D then very kindly closed one nostril for me as I inhaled deeply a few times on poppers.....and so with a rush from the poppers.....the session developed. I will not try to retell everything from this stage, but I had electrodes attached to my testicles and the voltage increased over time. I am sure that I was whipped and paddled with a variety of implements, as I screamed through my gag. This was divine and I was left wanting more. A harder whipping, more lashes, more electric shocks (for which I did not need to wait very long) and craved others to observe my suffering. Sadly, I cannot be marked but I can genuinely say, I would have loved Miss D to mark me with her whips. I have no idea how long this stage of the session lasted, but it finished all too soon, Miss D knowing just when to push me harder and when to pause to allow recovery. As I was released from my bondage, I stood for a second, the warm glow from my bum, the poppers wearing off, with electrics to my balls continuing....I could not wait for the second stage of the session. I wonder how many lashes I took from which instruments? 

For the next stage of the session, I was face down, kneeling on a bondage bench, as though I was on all fours, but with my legs and chest supported. My legs were again fixed into bondage and nice and wide apart, my arms locked together behind my back and then raised, by the ceiling hooks so that I was in a slight stress position. Miss D taking time to ensure all was to her requirements and then she began. In this position, I was whipped some more and then ....to my absolute delight ...I felt what I thought was a butt plug being placed inside me.  More accurately, this was an electric plug as I soon discovered and the next period passed (again I had no concept of time) in a haze of pain and pleasure....the increasing voltage to by balls and now my anus, I think increasing over time, as I screamed in pain and I assure you....also screaming in absolute joy. Mistress alternated between having me in a ball gag and a wonderful latex gas mask, which when combined with poppers simply took an amazing experience in my submission, so much further.  It was amazing how Miss D could be 1cm from my face, hopefully enjoying my pain, whilst dispensing poppers and increasing the voltage to my bum. Removing the electrical plug, Miss D then pegged me...firstly with a small cock and then a larger one but only after I had sucked on this latex cock, as Miss D described what a useless slut I was and how she was going to fuck me. Miss D talked about perhaps having her Female friends watch me sometime or about having a real cock fuck me- I have no idea if these might happen or if this was only talk, but it will be fun to revisit and wonder if someone else is about to enter the room & if they did, there would be nothing I could do. I received the best fucking I have ever had. It had been some years since I was last on a rubber cock.....I hope I do not wait so long for my next...and  I hope Miss D uses her larger size next time to stretch me further. Lying there so vulnerable, with gag or gas mask on, inhaling poppers and having electricity through my balls and anus, then pegged and fucked like the slut I long to be.....heaven. Not knowing what might happen, might I be fisted, or whipped, candle wax applied, suffocated, shared, weights applied to nipple or ball clamps....to be so helpless, so out of control...devine. 

When my arm bondage was relaxed and then removed, I could feel the blood return, I had not noticed the  tension....such was the thrill of the electrics and pegging. The third stage of the session took place with me in a body bag, hands fixed by my side and completely immobile, in gas mask with Miss D applying poppers.....with my tiny cock cage the only part of me exposed other than my head. I did not know if Miss D would remove the cage or not - I had no expectations that I would be released or that I would be allowed to cum, I do enjoy being frustrated. It was however a thrill when Miss D decided to remove and what followed was a lovely session of tease and denial. Inevitably as I have always been quick to cum, by the time I thought to seek permission to cum, it was too late. I suspect Miss D was kind to me as this was my first session....I fully appreciate that I might have been made to clean my own mess, and lick my own spunk and / or have been whipped harder for covering her hand in spunk.

All too soon, the session ended, with us sitting together sharing a drink ....me still in my basque and stockings, Miss D (sadly but understandably) having re-covered her wonderful boobs, having allowed me to briefly see these whilst in bondage. I spoke to her, as I really am... a cross-dressing submissive and dare I hope, a new bdsm friend. If you are over 50 in your second marriage and a tranny and sub, you spend so much of your life not being yourself. For 10mins it was wonderful to be me and chat.

I had completely lost track of time. I had no idea if 30 mins or 4 hours had passed- I need not have worried, Miss D was in complete control. 

As for the session, well there will have been so much I excluded from above but it was wonderful and I hope to repeat soon and for Miss D to treat me more harshly, less forgivingly and to have real fun in inflicting me with pain. I adored the humiliation and degradation, I'm hoping that Miss D will take my limits and move beyond these and open a further level of submission and introduce me to new fun depravity. 

So, if you are like me and searching for a genuine Female Dominatrix, they do exist -do keep looking. 

To Miss D, simply thank you. I hope to serve you for a long time to come as you show me just how pathetic and submissive I truly am.