I am 40 years old and have been married to my wife for 10 years.

I have been with my wife since she was 18 and I was 22.

I always got on incredibly well with my in-laws, especially my mother-in-law, Who is 57. My father in law was always fine with me, but had a short temper and was very domineering over the rest of the family.

A couple of years ago there was an argument between my wife and her father resulting in the two of them no longer speaking to or seeing each other. Her parents remain married but we do not see her father.

Consequently, we do not see her mother as often as we used to either, as they no longer just pop in to see us or the grandchildren, no family gatherings with all of the in-laws together that kind of thing.

Shamefully, I’ve always fancied my mother-in-law. When I first met her, She was in her qlate 30s, similar to my wife currently. To say she was an attractive, older woman wouldn’t be accurate, she was an attractive woman, confident, and frankly sexy.

I think it’s fairly common for young men in their early 20s to fancy an attractive woman in mid to late 30s I certainly did, but it was nothing more than a fantasy.

What changed that fantasy into something more lustful happened one night in my mid 20s. I was staying at my in law with my girlfriend and late at night I went to the bathroom. The bathroom light was always left on overnight for my girlfriend’s younger sister, so I just walked into the bathroom. in a matter of a split second I managed to walk in and catch my mother-in-law, naked, getting some thing out of the airing cupboard. She turned and our eyes met, I instantly apologized and got out as soon as possible.

My now wife thought it was hilarious but I went to sleep trying to sear the image I had just seen into my brain. In all honesty it was just her bum, her back, and the mere hint of her left breast, but over the years the image has grown large in my brain. I’d managed to form a permanent picture in my head from something that lasted probably three or four seconds.

Over the years, I have often fantasized about my mother-in-law but it wasn’t until our children were born that I even contemplated doing anything about it.

After our second child was born by C-section, the intimacy in my marriage was naturally at a low point. Sitting awake with my newborn baby in the spare room one night, I hatched a plan to visit my mother-in-law in the morning on my way to work and see if catching her alone could prompt anything.

During that visit, I knew her husband had been unwell for many months, and that she was going through a hard time so I made it clear to her that I thought she was fantastic and a wonderful woman. Whilst she did get upset, and was very grateful for the things I had said, beyond a long, lingering cuddle nothing untoward happened, much to my disappointment. That being said, I am pretty sure something got into her head.

Fast forward a few years, and I often dropped my children at their grandparents, who looked after them in their younger years one or two days a week, so I still saw her often and shared some time alone as the children played. Of course nothing happened.

Shortly afterwards my wife fell out with her father and now they don’t see each other.

As I said earlier, this means we don’t see so much of her mother either and I must confess this upsets me on a personal level, although I agree with my wife’s decision not to see her father.

Despite only see my mother-in-law once a month or so the lust has never died. We moved further away, and so the opportunity to just call in isn’t there either.

Recently, however, I was asked to attend a work meeting which would mean I would have to drive through the town they live in on the way there and back.

I decided to call in on the way back as I knew father-in-law would be at work.

When I arrived at my appointment, I text her to ask if she was going to be in and if I could call in a few hours later. She replied to confirm and as usual, ended the text with a kissing emoji 😘

On the way there my heart was beating in anticipation. I shouldn’t have expected anything and my thoughts were frankly wrong, but I couldn’t help it. I was excited to see her.

When I arrived, she opened the door and was clearly very pleased to see me. I hadn’t set foot in that house for two years at least which felt weird at first.

She looked fantastic. She always did in my eyes. She got me a tea and we idly chatted in the kitchen before moving to the living room when the drinks were ready. I made sure to sit on the sofa rather than a chair, and she opted to sit at the other end. In my head, this was a sign.

After chatting about all sorts, we eventually got round to talking about the argument between my wife and her father. She confessed to me that over the years she had thought about leaving him several times due to his domineering argumentative ways, but having been together for so long, she’d never seen it through.

My reply sort of fell out my mouth. I said if only you told me that 11 years ago I’d have eloped with you before I married your daughter.

She laughed. I laughed, and then awkward silence fell.

She changed the subject awkwardly and we started talking about a few other things. After a while I thought it was time to make a move and made to leave. I couldn’t just stay forever. Nothing was going to happen.

In the hallway, she took my coat from the banister, and held it up for me to put my arms in. With my coat on, she rubbed both my arms from behind me.

I turned around and said goodbye, giving her a kiss on the cheek. I stepped back and simply said ‘I miss you’. Straightaway, she replied with ‘I’ve missed you too’. we embraced in a long cuddle, neither of us seemingly wanting it to end. Eventually, I moved to release her slightly and our eyes met. I couldn’t help myself, I said ‘ you should’ve told me 11 years ago’, she smiled, and the inches between us closed as I kissed her lips.

A brief kiss, and our eyes met again. The mood had changed. This time our lips met again and parted. It was a slow passionate kiss. That was the moment things changed forever. My hand reached the back of her neck and the passion took over. She pushed my coat back off my shoulders, and our hands were all over each other. Without talking, we were ascending the stairs, still kissing and pawing at one another.

My tie was removed. She was unbuttoning my shirt as we entered her bedroom. Although fast and frantic at first, when naked in the bed there was a genuine, passion and love for each other. We made love and lay in each other’s arms afterwards.

Unspoken, we both knew it was clearly wrong, but equally neither of us said anything we just held each other and kissed. The immediate frantic passion had passed, but neither of us wanted to leave and spoil it.

Eventually, the sound of a vehicle outside had us leaping out of bed. It was a false alarm, but the moment was interrupted.

I think a bit of guilt kicked in then, and although I had a glass of water downstairs with her before I left, the electricity we had felt earlier had been replaced by what I can only assume was fear or guilt.

As I left this time our hands intertwined And we shared a few more kisses.

I left saying I would call her and with one final kiss I opened the door and left.

Since that time we have spoken, and although both feel guilty, we both admitted we very much enjoyed it.

I have another meeting next week at the same place and have suggested I call in again but now the guilt is creeping in.

I’ve lusted after this woman the best part of two decades and I still do - it was wonderful but I guess the difference between the fantasy and the reality is there’s no guilt in the fantasy and there is with this reality.