I settled back into my comfy chair to watch the news on TV, a cup of hot chocolate in my hand.  My phone went.  It was almost midnight, who would call me at this hour?  'Unknown caller', announced the screen.  I answered it.

"Hello?"

No answer, just heavy breathing.  I went to hang up, but the devil in me told me to have some fun.

"Is this a dirty phone call?"

There was a long silence, then a man's voice said;

"Yes."

A little shudder ran though me.

"Okay, carry on."

Another silence, then;

"Really?"

"Yes, talk to me."

"How old are you?"

"Twenty-two."

I lied.  I am forty-four, divorced and live alone.  But I wasn't going to spoil his fantasy.  I had never had a dirty phone call, he was almost certainly wanking and the thought turned me on.

"What are you wearing?"

"I was getting ready for bed, I've been out clubbing."

"But what are you wearing?"

"Just my underwear."

"Describe it to me."

"Black, skimpy half cup bra, a thong, stockings and suspenders."

"Take the bra off."

"Only if you tell me what you are wearing."

"Nothing.  I'm wearing nothing.  I'm lying naked on my bed."

"With your cock in your hand?"

"Yes."

"Wanking?"

"Yes.  Take your bra off."

"It's off.

 "Have you got big tits?  Are your nipples hard?"

"36C, (True.) and my nipples are hard."

"Play with them."

"I am.  Is your cock big?  Are you circumcised?"

"Nine inches, uncut, but my foreskin is pulled right back."

Nine inches?  Now who was telling porkies?"

"Is your…  your cunt wet?"

"Very."

"Take your knickers off.  Touch your cunt."

"Shall I take the stockings off as well?"

Did I detect a note of panic in his voice?

"No, no!  Leave them on.  Lie on the bed and play with yourself."

I was wishing now that I could,  I was in fact, wearing jogging bottoms, an old sweatshirt and very sensible knickers.  No bra though.  I put the phone down, pulled my sweatshirt up under my my chin and pushed both pants and knickers down to give me access.

"Are you still there?"

"Yes, I was getting comfortable."

"Tell me about your evening, did you pull?"

"Pull what?"

"Did you get a bloke?"

"Oh.  Yes, I did."

"Did you suck his cock?"

"Yes."

"Was it big?"

"Not as big as yours."

"Did he fuck you?"

"Of course."

"How?"

"What do you mean how?  With his cock of course."

"I mean in what position?"

"Oh.  We were in the back alley, so we did it standing, I took my knickers off, he lifted my leg up and fucked me face to face."

There was a gasp, then a pause.

"Did you just come?"

Another long silence.  Then;

"Yes."

"I suppose you're going to go now, leave me hanging?"

"No, keep talking."

"Did you get spunk on your phone?"

"A bit, yes."

"Messy.  Did you shoot much?"

"Loads."

"What a waste, I wanted it in my cunt."

"Your bloke did that."

"No, he used a condom, everybody's wasting it tonight.  Can you go again?"

"Probably."

"I'm going to make myself come now, shall I place the phone so that you can hear?"

"Yes please."

I did just that and used both hands to bring myself off, fingers of my left hand up my truly wet cunt, fingers of my right strumming my stiff, slippery clit.  I moaned as I wanked and cried out when I came.  I wiped my fingers clean and picked up my phone.

"Did you hear?"

"Yes."

"Are you hard again?

"Yes, talk to me.  Do you take it up the arse?"

"I love it up the arse."

"Do you like a man to come in your mouth?  Do you swallow it?"

"Yes to both."

"Do you have a dildo?"

"Several, (True.)  I've got one bigger than your cock, I fuck my arse with it, but I prefer a real one."

I was wanking furiously again, this time one handed.  I pictured him doing it two handed.  I came again.

"Are you still, there?"

"Yes, I just came again."

"Me too."

"Can I call you again tomorrow?"

"Yes.  About the same time?"

"Yes, goodnight.  Thankyou."

The line went dead.  I put his number in my blocked caller list and went to bed