I am sure that this posting will create a little controversy however, as this is an adult site I am sure the tabling of reasoned personal views are welcomed. These are an expression of our opinion.
The subject I want to invite comment on is the set-up and control of rooms for Couples and Fems and, the approach of single males.
We are not looking for single males, I am sure that those who read our profile can see that this quite clearly stated. As a result we set-up or participate in rooms that are quite obviously geared to couples and fems.
Last night we set up such a room. At one point we had 71 participants, 29 of which were single guys. There was at the time over 1500 people in the chatrooms as a whole, so plently of choice and opportunity to talk to many varied and interesting people. At one point our PC crashed, we were frozen out; we could not get back into our own room because it was innundated by single men. In accordance to the chatrooms T&Cs which state " If you open a room you must warn someone before you kick them out"; we politely asked on many occasions to if the single males would respect the intent of the room title and leave. On this basis we are struggling to see where we are in conflict with the rules, however we were told in no uncertain terms that we were wrong to take this approach.
I know that someone will suggest that we use a passworded room; this is in conflict with teh T&Cs as multiple room set-up is not allowed. Irrespective of this, we come here to enjoy ourselves not to admin and vet access through the circulation of passwords. I suppose one would ask the question is it better to jump between two rooms giving access or spending all night asking guys to show respect in an open room.
I also refer to the T&Cs again which further state "We encourage everyone to treat each other with respect". This raises two issues; is it right having given out numerous requests for the single males to respect the participants and purpose of the room to then reluctantly have to resort to kicking them out. Secondly, the fact that these guys are in teh room in the first place showing any respect to the fems and couples who wish to be there without single male involement?
I am sure all can appreciate that this is not a subject we are the only people concerned about; by the same token we are interested to hear the considered views of all interested people; couples, fems, moderators and the single males.
We are hoping that by raising this difficult issue we can have a better understanding and appreciation of the problem and hoefully a reasonable solution can be achieved.
if the room is called couple and single fems only then i guess it fair to say thats the only people you want in there.
personally if a room states "only couples" then i wont go in.
im not sure how rules stand for kicking people from a room if they dont fit the title, as far as im aware you cant.
i understand the problems of having passworded rooms, only those you already know will know the password so you restrict your selves from meeting new people.
i did enter a room that was a location based room title and was very bluntly told i wasnt from that area and F**koff i was then booted.
this issue has been raised before and i think the only solution is to follow the aup and rules and see what happens when the new chat comes along.
xxx fem xxx
Thanks for your comment Fem.
You are right it is a sticky problem. One of the problems is teh interpretation of the AUP and T&Cs - they indicate respect for all and; after warning an ability and entitlement to make them leave. This view is not teh same as some of teh moderators making it difficult to know where you stand.
CnG
I'm thinking out load so I apologise if this is a bit of a ramble!
I think this thread poses a good question but the problem is that if you have a room for fems only, then you're going to have a gay/bi men’s room and then maybe a couples only room and where will it stop? Everyone will want a room.
Although I have given up opening rooms because very few people seem to take notice of the title, I don't think that having specialist separate rooms is really the answer.
If you are talking about rooms that you can only access because you have a certain profile i.e. single female etc I think this possibly could encourage people to fake a profile just so they can access a certain chat room. Some people would inevitably be 'found out' so then we wouldn't trust the rooms anyway, making them redundant.
If however you are talking about amending the AUP so you could kick people who didn't fit the room criteria, it may work if people didn't abuse the right.
I hope that makes sense!
KM
x
I wholly subscribe to Bilkie's earlier post which biwelshminx refers to. The site is for all to use. The most important issue though is respect. If you enter a room and slag off the people in there, you can expect an hostile reaction. I would defend anyone entering a room quietly and respectfully contributing to what's going on. They have no reason to be kicked or excluded. If you want to see this in action, look for the Easties room on server 1. I would welcome your contribution in there.
G
Questions....
How do you know the couples you allow in your room are couples?
How do you know the single fems are single fems?
If we could kick guys out of a couples only room, does that mean we could also:
Kick skinny women out of the bbw rooms.
Kick straight people out of bi rooms.
Kick fat people out of 'no lard allowed' rooms
Set up rooms for tall people only and boot the short-arses out?
It may sound ridiculous, but once you set off down that road - it won't be long until someone wants something else.
Is it really such a hardship that single guys come into a room for couples?
In my experience if you find 40 guys in a room, there's likely to be no more than a handful actually talking (and then they need someone to talk to). OK you get some who will say hello and then comment on your profile ("nice pics") or something equally short. It's hardly going to through you off track or stop you talking to other people - after all how do you cope when 8 couples are having 4 different conversations?
I could almost have more empathy if there was no suggestion that single fems should be allowed in this proposed sanctuary from single men - if it was a request for a couples 4 couples only room.. rather than a couples only (but we'll let single fems in too as we don't mind shagging them). By being able to open your own room (with pretty much whatever title tickles your fancy) you already have the advantage of narrowing down the room users. The beauty of the chatroom is you can wander freely around – talk to people from different areas with different interests… sticking a great big padlocked gate on everything or having to pass a criteria test to get in anywhere would be .. erm… crap really.
and whisper the password to any cpls/fems as you see fit. When you are ready get an Op to close this room for you and open a new one with said password.
assionkiss: :passionkiss: :passionkiss: