I have been asked by three couples from this site for a meet during the last week? Would you beleive it, not one single couple turned out to be genuine. I certainly do feel like naming them and shaming them so that other geuine people do not have their time wasted by them.
The most unfortunte thing is that one couple promised to meet me in the gay village Manchester and told me what they will be wearing and the time they will be there. I got their at the correct time and waited for a further one hour, but no sign of them. I tried to call, but each time the phone was answered by a machine. I travelled 50 miles each way.
Another couple I had invited back to my place, also failed to turn up. They did not have the courtesy to give a quick call to say SORRY.
Last and least the 3rd couple last night invited me to their place in Staffs, As I got off M6 junction 15, i got a txt message saying..... absolutely sorry just have had some unexpected guests, I txt back, that I have almost arrived and I can wait for a couple of hours until the guests leave. I got no reply after that...fuck sake I have almost travelled 100 miles to get to you? Please be honest...
sounds like some really tough luck on your part all i will say is persevere and keep trying there are genuine couples out there ... have you tried to meet up at the various socials or parties that are arranged .. an excellent way of meeting people and determining if the are genuine
I agree with sara john.
You also have to bear in mind, people do have last minute changes of heart. If they are new too, it doesnt take much for them to decide against what is a big step.
Also, the other issue you have as a single guy is that if they p*ss you off, there are thousands more right behind you who will go along with it. Plus for every couple that messes a bloke around, there are hundreds of blokes on here that are timewasters.
I have met a few good people on here and also been messed around and insulted by folk for telling people I arent bothered for meeting cos I got a bad vibe. Just stick with it!
G
Man you've had some bad luck :-( hey stick with it though because there are some gems out there buddy :thumbup:
We totally agree...hang on in there....and sort the wheat from the chaf! It can be done!
We have been messed around big time recently, but hey, its all good fun, when you get the fun!
There are MANY genuine folk on here, it is like a poster above said......some people just bottle out at the last minute!
They should of been up frount with you and explained things, but maybe they were embarrased?!
I once bottled out, but did take the time to actually ring up and explain, and my honesty was respected!
Sounds a good idea for a new post on The Cafe.....whats the best/worst reason you have heard for cancelling a meet?!
Lucy and Mike (both of us for a change)
best excuse ...... 'my wife found out and wont let me come' this from a 'single' guy
thanks for all the lovely messages, its re-assuring to hear there are so many couples out there who still care...
Thanks
desiass,
I have to say I have been on this site for almost 5 years now...(oh don't time fly, when you haveing fun), I have attended a number of socials, munches and parties, and had my share of meets, and I have to say, have not yet, ever been let down by anyone !! Maybe I'm just lucky, or maybe I have taken a little more time to get to know the people first. Not sure. But do have to say, if you show yourself to be genuine, and make an effort to know people, I think you will find that most on here are 100% genuine.
There are some genuine people out there - but in my view there are also loads of single blokes out there that pass themselves off as "couples" and "single females" - but to be fair it is pretty easy to catch them out.
If you have been deceived then that is clearly not very nice, that said, a bit more research on your part would not leave you "stood-up".
For example - a landline phone number or address, or even an email contact (not a web one) - it would of course mean that you would have to reciprocate and produce your details too - but it will thin out those that are genuinely serious and those that "might be".
Of course there may be "genuine" couples out there that are not willing to provide those details, it is of course your call as to how geniune they actually are before you embark upon arranging meets on the strength of their assertions.
Alternatively concentrate your efforts in a recognised venue.
We are also a genuine couple, we have only just recently started meeting people and so far have been lucky, in such a wide and varied lifestyle though, there are always going to be the odd time wasters and people who have nothing better to do with their time than sit on a website pretending to be something other than what they really are.
That is why we have been so frustrated at not having a web cam, because as a genuine couple who have nothing to hide, it is hard to arrange genuine meets when you cannot show that you are who you are.
That should be rectified pretty soon though.
Keep your chin up desiass, they are out there, we are one of them.
Steve, your last sentance makes no sense to me.
i think you will always find people on here,in chat etc that are right then at that moment serious about meeting.
then the evening comes around and they may get coldfeet,not be horny, had shit day at work, be knackered,etc. they then no longer like the reality of meeting a stranger.
some will have really been couples,some will have been guys who were just getting off on the cyber chat imagining you fucking their mrs.
there are no hard and fast rules to finding out whos the genuine ones.
i tend to expect pics, cam and resonably chat more than that one night, then only meet localish people so we can meet for a social drink a few days before, after all cams dont have smellyvision,(yes ive met some guys who are strangers to toothpaste and shower gel lol)
have you considered inviting them to your place? but dont go giving out your address at first chat.
just dont start paying out for hotels etc and have that additional cost wasted.
im sure you will meet some genuine people, get along to socials, helpyou and others get to know each other in a non sexual enviroment.
xx fem xx
We have found one foolproof way of weeding out timewasters and dreamers. Cam and chat to them on the phone at the same time.
We tend to do this as a pre-cursor to meeting at a club, that way if they don't show, or are not our cup of tea the evening isnt a total bust. Only once we have met them "socially" would we even dream of inviting them to our home.
The other swinging site we are on as a system of validataion, so that you can see if they are genuine, may appeal to you as you may know some of the same people etc with whom you can chat and find out a bit more about them. This may seem like extreme lengths to go to but you don't get all dressed up, shaved, pampered and in the mood to be let down by someone who never had any intention of turning up in the 1st place.
We're genuine, we post pics on the site and fill out the profile as much as possible, have recent face pics available and expect to chat on the phone and cam fairly early on from making contact as we don't see why we should waste our time giving some other person their jollies at our expense.
Maybe we are too strict in our vetting process as so far we have only met a single bi fem from this site and she was pleased that we went to such degrees to assure her we were genuine, and that we were as described in our profile. Of all of the "couples" that have chatted to us wanting to meet, so far as soon as we mention chatting on the phone and camming with both parties we never seem to hear from them again... strange that.....lol
We do a similar thing, or rather intend to! I think you need to, at the end of the day, this site is great, but, you've never *actually* met that other person/couple have you? And its because of that "but" we blocked our faces etc. Of course, when we do meet a lucky lady, we'll excahnge as many photos/phone calls/drinks in a pub as everyone feels comfortable with!
To the OP, man that really sucks mate, enough single guys on here get a lot of stick, but being let down like that is plain wrong. Best of luck anyhow!
hi. i had a simialr problem witha girl? who would only text! cos her phone does not work? i should have known but she sent her text for me to leave and travel to chesterlee st 45 miles when i got there knocked at the door no answer. i was assured by a member from club f she was genuine!. he or she called mea perv so thats how they get there kicks. i was told some send these fakes to watch you from a nearby house. when they told you to meet in the gay area that was your clue. i cured this problem when i said id send a member of phenix door staff from newcastle around
Sorry to say as a couple we have been messed about by couples, this is why we end our profile ; we are genuine are you .
we are real lol and can be verified by most in the nw rooms. we find our main trouble is with peeps that confirm our party invites and just dont show, when in the room next time, no effort to say sorry will be forthcoming.
we also find that a lot of peeps on here dont actually meet but say they do, or is it we are mingers lol.
anyway, enuff ranting...............anyone wanna do us
xxxxxxxxxxx
swinging is about accommodating in more ways than one. its about accommodating the needs of the other players as well as them accommodating your needs..if you find someone attractive and wish to play with them i see no reason as to not go out of your way to accommodate how they wish to take things further..we do the msn cam thing as a matter of course it allows them to see us and us to see them without the rest of the chatroom being party to our cam.. it also makes for easier point of contact w..ie we know where to find people quickly rather than browsing the chatrooms in the hope they may be in
im not suggesting this is the only way ..i mean you can please your self of course but it works for us..
being let down at parties.. we reckon 20 per cent is a good figure if you are inviting a number of unknowns .. less if all pals but still near to.. being let down for meets well we have never had that happen when its been a firm meet..
