Ok every sorry if this upsets anyone its not my intention,
My rant is about the name of the rooms in the chat room and peoples mentalitly I was on there this evening and thier was a room along the lines of, let me fuck your slut wife this evening,
I mean come on folks, I know im only young, but if i was married, i would let my wife any where near whoever created this room, its just degrading
I have been on here a while and had a couple of meets, and the impression i have got is people wanting to lift the stigma that swinging seems to have, its about like mind people enjoying themselves, i just feel that this degrades people, ok it might work for people, but for us youngsters who want to be taken seriously as a single guy it makes it very hard, i have been on here for two years and only been able to meet 3 couples in all of that time, i feel that im always polite and always genuine, just that there are the few who seem to want to ruin it,
Even in rooms where it says ask before your whisper there are still people who dont seem to pay attention, its just rude,
sorry rant over people, just had to get it off my chest.
Ed
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Time To Moan About The Chatroom
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Totally agree with you Sussex.
I absolutely HATE that word, - slut - but it has to be said, if you venture into the story section of the site, it's used loads - often by women talking about themselves.
Maybe some people feel that using terminology like this makes me feel sexier, and therefore more sexy to other people.
I absolutely HATE that word, - slut - but it has to be said, if you venture into the story section of the site, it's used loads - often by women talking about themselves.
Maybe some people feel that using terminology like this makes me feel sexier, and therefore more sexy to other people.
Dont be worried.
Ive been on here ages and not met any axe murderers yet
Also, you will be amazed at how different some people can be from their forum/chat room persona.
I've seen people who on here are full of bravado, have self-esteem to the point of cockiness, sound like they have "been there/done that" so much so that you might feel apprehensive about being in their company in case you aren't "with it" enough - and then when you do meet them they are the shyest, self effacing quiet person you've ever met.
So - don't go by how the minority sometimes sound on here. Yes there are idiots, like in all walks of life. But there's also loads of great people. :thumbup:
Cherry x
Ive been on here ages and not met any axe murderers yet
Also, you will be amazed at how different some people can be from their forum/chat room persona.
I've seen people who on here are full of bravado, have self-esteem to the point of cockiness, sound like they have "been there/done that" so much so that you might feel apprehensive about being in their company in case you aren't "with it" enough - and then when you do meet them they are the shyest, self effacing quiet person you've ever met.
So - don't go by how the minority sometimes sound on here. Yes there are idiots, like in all walks of life. But there's also loads of great people. :thumbup:
Cherry x
Hmmm!
It wouldn't be my desire to be called a slut however, for some it is a huge turn on and really not much different, I'd guess, from role play.
In fact, i honestly don't see it as that big a deal. I don't go in rooms like that 'cos it's not my thing but I'm more disgusted by Bareback rooms, truth be told. But - yet again - each to their own and all that crap.
It wouldn't be my desire to be called a slut however, for some it is a huge turn on and really not much different, I'd guess, from role play.
In fact, i honestly don't see it as that big a deal. I don't go in rooms like that 'cos it's not my thing but I'm more disgusted by Bareback rooms, truth be told. But - yet again - each to their own and all that crap.
Sex God
Have to say i agree with Essex. I dont like the idea's some have for room names I often think the same as you.
Reading Cherrytree's contribution. I would definately agree with her as too the nature of people on site and off it. Sometimes they are just two different things.
Marya I too have a big problem with bareback rooms
I think they are thoughtless, stupid, senseless and should be banned! I wonder if that will bring out the 'Oh, but it's an individuals right to chose' bollox again 
. If so i'll go get my hard hat now......... 
Reading Cherrytree's contribution. I would definately agree with her as too the nature of people on site and off it. Sometimes they are just two different things.
Marya I too have a big problem with bareback rooms
I think they are thoughtless, stupid, senseless and should be banned! I wonder if that will bring out the 'Oh, but it's an individuals right to chose' bollox again . If so i'll go get my hard hat now......... Quote by Lost
Have to say i agree with Essex. I dont like the idea's some have for room names I often think the same as you.
Reading Cherrytree's contribution. I would definately agree with her as too the nature of people on site and off it. Sometimes they are just two different things.
Marya I too have a big problem with bareback rooms
Agree, bareback rooms should be banned
I don't think they should be banned. If nothing else, they are a very useful tool for me as I can plainly see who to add to my "ignore" list.
And yes, the right to choose bollox has been done at least once when the last relative newbie got shouted down by the PC brigade ...
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/134781.html
And yes, the right to choose bollox has been done at least once when the last relative newbie got shouted down by the PC brigade ...
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/134781.html
Sex God
I don't have a problem with the 'slut' style rooms- i find that a bit of a turn on...
Bareback is a definate no no in my book though.
I think what you'll find here is each to their own, what one person thinks of as distasteful, to another it would be just what would float their boat.
You might not rate the kind of person that enjoys that room, perhaps others might think you're too 'nice', and for others, perhaps bareback is just their cup of tea, etc etc
If you don't like a certain room don't go in, or open up your own, I think you'll find all the rooms are there because they are appealing to at least 1 or 2 people, if not many more!!
Maz xx
Bareback is a definate no no in my book though.
I think what you'll find here is each to their own, what one person thinks of as distasteful, to another it would be just what would float their boat.
You might not rate the kind of person that enjoys that room, perhaps others might think you're too 'nice', and for others, perhaps bareback is just their cup of tea, etc etc
If you don't like a certain room don't go in, or open up your own, I think you'll find all the rooms are there because they are appealing to at least 1 or 2 people, if not many more!!
Maz xx
I can understand everyone's point, and i dont what what people are into, its just how it comes across. maybe im to much of a nice guy, who knows, i just wanna find genuine people, once organised a meet with a couple, who was all yeah she is a slut, loved it hard up her and all that kind of thing, when we meet they was nothing like they said, hadnt even shag in a year
Sex God
Quote by mazandden
If you don't like a certain room don't go in, or open up your own, I think you'll find all the rooms are there because they are appealing to at least 1 or 2 people, if not many more!!
Maz xx
Just about says it all for me :thumbup:
Same as if you dont like whats on the television....
Turn it off/over...
Sex God
Quote by northwest-cpl
Do you really think that the people in a bareback room, or most chatrooms for that matter, actually intend to do what they're talking about - it's fantasy land.
A lot about swinging is fantasy...
People get into swinging via fantasy's they have had same as many people have fantasy's they will never live out because then they become reality's and maybe not such a turn on to think about :thumbup:
Quote by northwest-cpl
Do you really think that the people in a bareback room, or most chatrooms for that matter, actually intend to do what they're talking about - it's fantasy land.
I actually know quite a lot of people who play bareback. A lot more than I ever expected in this "environment".
Quote by Marya_Northeast
Do you really think that the people in a bareback room, or most chatrooms for that matter, actually intend to do what they're talking about - it's fantasy land.
I actually know quite a lot of people who play bareback. A lot more than I ever expected in this "environment".
Most people I know who have barebacked are either dead or taking combination therapy drugs every day
Cherry - You are soo right!
In general though most folk are just folk .. with different senses of sexuality. Thank goodness we are not all the same. Part of the fun is meeting and sharing reminiscences etc.. Of course some are "newbies" and introducing themselves. Most embarrassed or awkward are "bi -curious" guys. Even though they want to share masturbation etc.. most are insistent that they are not wrongly "labelled". It does not matter if you enjoy sharing - It does not need a definition or justification .
Women (I have found) tend to be less concernd about all this. .. and happily enjoy watching guys playing with each other or sharing..etc..
In general though most folk are just folk .. with different senses of sexuality. Thank goodness we are not all the same. Part of the fun is meeting and sharing reminiscences etc.. Of course some are "newbies" and introducing themselves. Most embarrassed or awkward are "bi -curious" guys. Even though they want to share masturbation etc.. most are insistent that they are not wrongly "labelled". It does not matter if you enjoy sharing - It does not need a definition or justification .
Women (I have found) tend to be less concernd about all this. .. and happily enjoy watching guys playing with each other or sharing..etc..
Quote by Cherrytree
Dont be worried.
Ive been on here ages and not met any axe murderers yet
Also, you will be amazed at how different some people can be from their forum/chat room persona.
I've seen people who on here are full of bravado, have self-esteem to the point of cockiness, sound like they have "been there/done that" so much so that you might feel apprehensive about being in their company in case you aren't "with it" enough - and then when you do meet them they are the shyest, self effacing quiet person you've ever met.
So - don't go by how the minority sometimes sound on here. Yes there are idiots, like in all walks of life. But there's also loads of great people. :thumbup:
Cherry x
Quote by mazandden
I don't have a problem with the 'slut' style rooms- i find that a bit of a turn on...
Bareback is a definate no no in my book though.
Sorry for jumping in here and don't take it as a dig at you as its not its more my curiousity getting the better of me
but, do you like bareback? and i don't mean with just anyone i mean with den, and if so you could then say hey "i like bareback" thats just an example and theres probably lots of things you get up to with den you wouldn't do in a swinging scenario with just anyone, theres probably loads of couples on here that like anal with there partners (me and fb do) but wouldn't even think about it whilst swinging so does that mean i/we should never go in an anal lovers room? because i'll/we'll be judged and do anal with anyone with a pulse? i do agree with the original poster though that room titles containing slut can be a bit disrespectful to some but i don't see how a bareback named room (as an example) can annoy anyone, but whats worse is some people are actualy judging people by the room name they are in, now that is worring as most people tend to be nosey and have a peek if a room is busy regardless of its name (i know i do) thats like saying if i for example visited the mids room i'd be from the midlands? as we all know that wouldn't be the case so why is it then the case that everyone who visits a bareback room is into bareback sex with anyone they meet? sorry but if i was a fem i'd rather be called a slut anyday than be judged for who i speak to or a room name i may pop in for a nosey.@ seasider : don't you know anyone with a family?
:lol: :lol: 
Warming the Bed
Quote by Cherrytree
Dont be worried.
Ive been on here ages and not met any axe murderers yet
Also, you will be amazed at how different some people can be from their forum/chat room persona.
So - don't go by how the minority sometimes sound on here. Yes there are idiots, like in all walks of life. But there's also loads of great people. :thumbup:
Cherry x
Theres a lot to think about in this.
Is it a complaint or a warning? A mix of serious and lighthearted comment.
Sex God
Quote by solofun
I don't have a problem with the 'slut' style rooms- i find that a bit of a turn on...
Bareback is a definate no no in my book though.
Sorry for jumping in here and don't take it as a dig at you as its not its more my curiousity getting the better of me
but, do you like bareback? and i don't mean with just anyone i mean with den, and if so you could then say hey "i like bareback" thats just an example and theres probably lots of things you get up to with den you wouldn't do in a swinging scenario with just anyone, theres probably loads of couples on here that like anal with there partners (me and fb do) but wouldn't even think about it whilst swinging so does that mean i/we should never go in an anal lovers room? because i'll/we'll be judged and do anal with anyone with a pulse? i do agree with the original poster though that room titles containing slut can be a bit disrespectful to some but i don't see how a bareback named room (as an example) can annoy anyone, but whats worse is some people are actualy judging people by the room name they are in, now that is worring as most people tend to be nosey and have a peek if a room is busy regardless of its name (i know i do) thats like saying if i for example visited the mids room i'd be from the midlands? as we all know that wouldn't be the case so why is it then the case that everyone who visits a bareback room is into bareback sex with anyone they meet? sorry but if i was a fem i'd rather be called a slut anyday than be judged for who i speak to or a room name i may pop in for a nosey.@ seasider : don't you know anyone with a family?
:lol: :lol:Though i take your point regarding barebacking your partner and rooms attracting people by numbers etc. The idea that being a mids room and you not being from mids falls down in my mind. Mids room are not by calling mids room mids room advertising a potentially lethal activity. Where as a room called 'watch me bareback your wife'(and before anyone starts yes i know the risks involved with other practices etc so dont go off on one) is doing that.
Ok so im not seeking a discussion just giving a point of view from a person who in their professional and personal life has been winess to the pain of some pretty vile stuff happening through such things as this.
Not directing this next bit at you solofun but anyone barebacking other than there own partner ever - Go have a coffee in London light house on a sad day and listen to the pain of the brother sister mothers fathers and lovers and note on the tables in there bowls of CONDOMS!! they aint there for no reason. Go talk to the volunteers for terence higgins.
Come on nowadays no-one is unawre of the issues theres no exuse for stupidity and selfishness.
It aint gonna happen i know but ban the bareback rooms.
Fair point Lost, my gripe wasn't with bareback rooms in general it was more that people are judging others because of a room title they may have been in, and if your honest half of them are pure fantasy, but i do have to say that i disagree with you when you say ban bareback rooms, firstly i don't condone unprotected sex but people do it and regardless of what you and i think its surely there choice? secondly its not illegal to have unprotected sex so why should these so called rooms be banned, are people who have unprotected sex not welcome here? i'm not saying thats what your saying, its just a general question, next we'll have straight members asking to have bi rooms banned. You say its potentially lethal and you might have a point but so is Driving, Flying, Smoking, Drinking and most things we do on a daily basis, and if we all listen to the facts thrown at us regarding stds or hiv then gay sex and drug users pose an increased risk too, so should we ban gay rooms too? well if your reason is based on risks, if everyone who had unprotected sex was guaranteed to become infected my opinion would certainly change a little but it still wouldn't make a difference to anyone that does it, its all about risk and if they are willing to take these risks then they'll have to live with the cosequences, its like saying anyone who tries alcohol will end up an alcoholic or to ban alcohol altogether as it'll stop drink drivers and save lives. this is just my opinion of course but i dont see what harm a room name can be to anyone, if it doesn't involve anything illegal then i don't see too much wrong with it. in this society we live in people would think far worse of swinging than someone having unprotected sex, after all swinging can be risky and potentially lethal to, and accidents do happen even when using condoms, should we all stop swinging? i'll keep practising safe sex as will you so a room name won't make any difference to us and even if i entered such a room that wouldn't change. even though i might be judged otherwise by the same people that would have to look in the room to see you were in there in the first place. at the end of the day the only person you can trust is yourself, so keep yourself protected and leave the worring to people who take these silly risks, as a room name won't make any difference and certainly won't encourage or disscourage it either.
Sex God
Solofun and flower. Yeah i have to concede that indeed you are right. It would be very stupid to ban these types of room. I think I may speak with a certain degree of emotional bias when talking about these issues regarding unsafe sex. I dont dislike barebackers. I just dislike what they knowingly do, and the possible consequences of thier actions.
It's great to see the reasoned arguement win over the emotional reaction. Thanks for that.
I shall still advocate the use of protection at all possible opportunities and when asked by other so say 'swingers' if we would go bareback with them to answer them with disdain and wonder at thier selfish disegard or care over our health (rant rant).
You are right though we must preserve as much of our write to choose as is possible once one thing goes where does it stop?
Be good - cover thy knobs
It's great to see the reasoned arguement win over the emotional reaction. Thanks for that.
I shall still advocate the use of protection at all possible opportunities and when asked by other so say 'swingers' if we would go bareback with them to answer them with disdain and wonder at thier selfish disegard or care over our health (rant rant).
You are right though we must preserve as much of our write to choose as is possible once one thing goes where does it stop?
Be good - cover thy knobs
My 2p worth, I'll try to keep it brief.
1) It's a chatroom and people are talking not shagging.
2) Just because people are in those rooms it doesn't mean they would go bareback or do go bareback.
3) Whilst I personally have only gone 'bareback' with one man (my ex boyfriend) I would rather see bareback rooms talking about consensual sex between adults than the recently banned (thank God) 'pantie' rooms where men were talking about things like swapping their childrens knickers. :x
4) What adults decide to do between themselves, that isn't breaking any law and puts themselves - not you - at risk is their own busniess.
5) Yes I understand that to some people going bareback seems very disrepectful to others (and may well be 'so') but to another section of our society swinging is depraved/disrespectful/perverted etc.
Each to their own! I won't be going bareback so it doesn't make that much difference to me.
1) It's a chatroom and people are talking not shagging.
2) Just because people are in those rooms it doesn't mean they would go bareback or do go bareback.
3) Whilst I personally have only gone 'bareback' with one man (my ex boyfriend) I would rather see bareback rooms talking about consensual sex between adults than the recently banned (thank God) 'pantie' rooms where men were talking about things like swapping their childrens knickers.
:x 4) What adults decide to do between themselves, that isn't breaking any law and puts themselves - not you - at risk is their own busniess.
5) Yes I understand that to some people going bareback seems very disrepectful to others (and may well be 'so') but to another section of our society swinging is depraved/disrespectful/perverted etc.
Each to their own! I won't be going bareback so it doesn't make that much difference to me.
Sex God
Quote by Kiss
My 2p worth, I'll try to keep it brief.
1) It's a chatroom and people are talking not shagging.
2) Just because people are in those rooms it doesn't mean they would go bareback or do go bareback.
3) Whilst I personally have only gone 'bareback' with one man (my ex boyfriend) I would rather see bareback rooms talking about consensual sex between adults than the recently banned (thank God) 'pantie' rooms where men were talking about things like swapping their childrens knickers.
4) What adults decide to do between themselves, that isn't breaking any law and puts themselves - not you - at risk is their own busniess.
5) Yes I understand that to some people going bareback seems very disrepectful to others (and may well be 'so') but to another section of our society swinging is depraved/disrespectful/perverted etc.
Each to their own! I won't be going bareback so it doesn't make that much difference to me.
I take all those points Kiss and think fair play other than your point 4
If it was only those involved with bare backing then ok maybe its a fair point. But can it not be seen that there are inevitably going to be innocent people this could effect. Or is just me that thinks that there are people out there that would cheat on their partners.
Sex God
Quote by Lost
If it was only those involved with bare backing then ok maybe its a fair point. But can it not be seen that there are inevitably going to be innocent people this could effect. Or is just me that thinks that there are people out there that would cheat on their partners.
With regards to people cheating on their partners..
Is it something we have to worry about
Sorry to sound mercanary but as long as you and I practise safe sex then why do we need to worry about anyone else :dunno:
Quote by flower411
If it was only those involved with bare backing then ok maybe its a fair point. But can it not be seen that there are inevitably going to be innocent people this could effect. Or is just me that thinks that there are people out there that would cheat on their partners.
With regards to people cheating on their partners..
Is it something we have to worry about
Sorry to sound mercanary but as long as you and I practise safe sex then why do we need to worry about anyone else :dunno:
I think there was a thread a while ago where people suggested that wearing a comdom is Safer but not foolproof.
Which means that if you unknowingly meet up with people who have previously been barebacking, they are knowingly putting you at increased risk.
There is nothing that is 100% certain to protect us from disease but we all like to take precautions. Except of course for those who bareback. They are increasing the risk of transmitting disease and I`d rather know where they are.
Again, there is no foolproof way of knowing but banning the bareback rooms will just drive them into secrecy which increases the risk for all of us.
But your assuming that everyone who enters such a room is into unprotected sex, thats way wrong, its a chat room not a play room, and to see who was in the room you would have to enter it wouldn't you? would it then be ok if people judged you becuase you went in? at the end of the day swinging is a great risk, using condoms is great protecton but only if its worn before any other contact which we know doesn't happen in most swinging scenarios, whether it be through oral, touching others then youself, taking facials, the list goes on so picking on people that choose to take a slighty higher risk won't make much difference, just look after yourself thats the best advice anyone can give rather than preaching about something that all of the population have probably done at one time or another if they care to be honest.
The majority of couples on here probably don't use condoms when their together and probably prefer it as do most loving couples if their honest, so doesn't that put them in the category of bareback lovers? or can you only love something if you do it with everyone? if thats the case we're all stuffed then as we all love sex here so must be expected to do it with anyone and everyone :shock:
