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fingernails gentlemen please!

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alright,alright,i know what yer thinking,fuck me dirty,cant you do better than this?erm,well yes,but i didn't want to,ok.?...its a petty point,i know..and not one thats going to attract much controversy or debate,in fact i doubt anyone will dissagree,which my dear fellas,begs me to ask,why is this so often overlooked?...fingernails,long,jagged and disgusting fingernails...ok,so i've done satan's sausage and fiendish flange,but what about the nasty nail?..does this make me a hygiene junky,some sort of compulsive dissorder?,maybe,but i would assume if anyone had any notion of raming those digits into one of those soft pink pussies,then going in with what amounts to a fistfull of razor blades would be a trifle sadistic?.............allow me to months ago,a fragrant summer d was setting about a pretty little thing,initiating her in the arts of feminine love,man it was crazy,the little moans of ectasy,moans that were trying to be subdued,but couldn't excitement was outweighing the awareness of being watched by the small invited audience,it was proving too much for her,she was having to let go of her this point mrs dirty was knelt on the back seat,in doggy fashion,her face planted inbetween the victim's all got too much for one onlooker,who thrust his hand towards mrs d's jack and danny."er herm" said i,that wasn't his name,thats just what i did with me d turned around,"its ok if your nails are short"says then rather sheepishly holds his hand up,oh dear!"perhaps you had better not,only they look a bit rough"....well,five more minutes elapsed,and this young princess was cumming in grand style,the stiffled moans were now given full vent,the juices in full flow,her first girl on girl encounter was going well,then,"ooowwho the fuck was that",bloody edward scissorhands had gone and rammed his mitt in,cutting mrs d in the process!,and i mean had some kitchen roll to hand,and bloodied about three sheets."oh,sorry my dear,you're a bit sensitive",..well,that fucked things right up didn't it?...i mean,doing that when told not to is one thing,although i suppose it was like dangling a bonio in front of a spaniel,yeah,ok,still out of order i know,but those bloody nails..file them boys,please...................anyone care to differ?
It might also be worth the ladies keeping their finger nails short/rounded, as they can also be quite painfull!
(Not talking much today, not well, sore throat, cough, cold and a bloody awful ear infection - on loads of antibiotics and cant go out cause I keep falling over lol and its not through the drink)
I think this is a general hygiene thing more than anything else, I for one cant seen why guys can't have clean and trimmed nails, In fact I cant see why they cant be clean and trim all over really?? especially if they want a chance of being invited to play!!! I mean whats so difficult in cleaning under your nails? and giving them a trim now and then??
I've encountered more than one dogger who doesn't clean under his foreskin, let alone his finger nails :shock: evil
T-J
Quote by RedHot
I've encountered more than one dogger who doesn't clean under his foreskin, let alone his finger nails :shock: evil
T-J

Please, lets just hope Dirty doesn't see this, or he will give us another story about Satan's Sausage! His last one put me off sex for ages!
If a guy, or even a girl cant at least have a good old wash and scrub before they go out, then they certainly wont be playing anywhere near me!
Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
I've encountered more than one dogger who doesn't clean under his foreskin, let alone his finger nails :shock: evil
T-J

Please, lets just hope Dirty doesn't see this, or he will give us another story about Satan's Sausage! His last one put me off sex for ages!
If a guy, or even a girl cant at least have a good old wash and scrub before they go out, then they certainly wont be playing anywhere near me!
Nor me, although I did ask one if he wanted me to scrub him down with a brillo pad first or would he rather just f**k off :evil:
He left . . . :grin:
T-J
Well I have had no complaints (so far) lol
I always make sure the nails are nicely trimmed and clean.
As for the foreskin - whats a foreskin? lol
It's getting to the stage where I even lay off the garlic if its going to be a definate
If anyone wans to find out they just have to pm to arrange a meet!!!!!
Not a problem I have to worry too much about cool
Those who have seen my ad will know what I mean. lol wink :wink:
Quote by Bassman69
Not a problem I have to worry too much about cool
Those who have seen my ad will know what I mean. lol wink :wink:

Ok, so you can get away with that one, but you still have to clean behind your ...... other bits, including your ears :lol:
Why would anyone want to go out playing if they were not clean and sweet smelling? For me that is part of the whole experience of dogging; the nice long shower, putting on the makeup and smellies, chosing something sexy to wear etc. I know that some of the boys might not be into the makeup, but a good wash and a bit of smelly stuff never hurt anyone!
Oh, and not too much of the smelly stuff or we start to wonder what you are trying to cover up :lol: a nice clean and fresh smelling body is just lovely!
I do agree with being clean and fresh. And a touch of aftershave doesn't go amiss either.
One other thing I have been made aware of.....a days growth can feel like coarse sandpaper on a womans skin so a good shave is always a worthwhile excercise too. cool
Quote by Bassman69
I do agree with being clean and fresh. And a touch of aftershave doesn't go amiss either.
One other thing I have been made aware of.....a days growth can feel like coarse sandpaper on a womans skin so a good shave is always a worthwhile excercise too. cool

*Sigh* Why is it that the guys who know how they should turn out for dogging, always live so far away? confused
T-J
Don't despair Redhot. I have nippers in Bournemouth so am a regular visitor to your part of the world. cool
For you I would make sure I used the triple blade for that extra smooth feel. wink
perchance I see a business opportunity . If Mrs DD would display her charms , we could set up a mobile nail and manicure bar in the relevant carpark and make a mint !
Brings a whole new meaning to "French Polish"
Ew yuck, nasty nails, very unneccessary indeed! lol
Men do seem to be less inclined to trim and tidy things up further south, although they're getting better......they'll all be waxing their bits soon :shock:
Quote by Bassman69
Don't despair Redhot. I have nippers in Bournemouth so am a regular visitor to your part of the world. cool
For you I would make sure I used the triple blade for that extra smooth feel. wink

Promises, promises . . . :wink:
Quote by Silk and Big G
perchance I see a business opportunity . If Mrs DD would display her charms , we could set up a mobile nail and manicure bar in the relevant carpark and make a mint !
Brings a whole new meaning to "French Polish"

Euuwww!! But who would get to handle this job? I suggest some one who works in Environmental Health Cleansing Department :shock:
From what I've seen of their working conditions on the TV show "Grime Busters" they would have no probs with some of the manky sods that linger in dark car park corners at night, stinking of BO, tobacco smoke, chip fat and assorted other unmentionable smells :uhoh:
A quick scrub with a rusty wire brush and carbolic soap should do the trick. If they don't bother cleaning themselves after that I for one would be inclined to give up :lol2:
T-J
Hey, I adopt the view that if you keep yourself clean and your hands, nails and fingers in the general condition of a gynacologist then you will get on ok with all people, be it male or female.
rolleyes
Quote by RedHot
I do agree with being clean and fresh. And a touch of aftershave doesn't go amiss either.
One other thing I have been made aware of.....a days growth can feel like coarse sandpaper on a womans skin so a good shave is always a worthwhile excercise too. cool

*Sigh* Why is it that the guys who know how they should turn out for dogging, always live so far away? confused
T-J
MMMMMMM Rehot - I am only just down the road from you!!
I would even replace the Brut with Denim!!! lol 8-)
Quote by Manolishi
I do agree with being clean and fresh. And a touch of aftershave doesn't go amiss either.
One other thing I have been made aware of.....a days growth can feel like coarse sandpaper on a womans skin so a good shave is always a worthwhile excercise too. cool

*Sigh* Why is it that the guys who know how they should turn out for dogging, always live so far away? confused
T-J
MMMMMMM Rehot - I am only just down the road from you!!
I would even replace the Brut with Denim!!! lol 8-)
You remember those? :shock: Or even worse still use them :eeek:
And there was me thinking you were a *young* guy wink
T-J
its when they still wear hi-karate youv'e gotta worry,redhot...still,better than nowt i imagine.
Quote by RedHot
I do agree with being clean and fresh. And a touch of aftershave doesn't go amiss either.
One other thing I have been made aware of.....a days growth can feel like coarse sandpaper on a womans skin so a good shave is always a worthwhile excercise too. cool

*Sigh* Why is it that the guys who know how they should turn out for dogging, always live so far away? confused
T-J
MMMMMMM Rehot - I am only just down the road from you!!
I would even replace the Brut with Denim!!! lol 8-)
You remember those? :shock: Or even worse still use them :eeek:
And there was me thinking you were a *young* guy wink
T-J
Ok Ok As it's a special occasion I will brush the cobwebs off the Hugo Boss
:wink:
Quote by Manolishi
Ok Ok As it's a special occasion I will brush the cobwebs off the Hugo Boss
wink

*Swoon* and there was me thinking you were going to brush cobwebs off the Old Spice . . . lol
T-J
Quote by RedHot

Ok Ok As it's a special occasion I will brush the cobwebs off the Hugo Boss
wink

*Swoon* and there was me thinking you were going to brush cobwebs off the Old Spice . . . lol
T-J
Never heard of the stuff!! redface
But you know me Red, anything that it takes........
Ok done some searching on the web - I might have a little white bottle in the attic!!
The lenghts I go to...........
Quote by dirtydoggers
its when they still wear hi-karate youv'e gotta worry,redhot...still,better than nowt i imagine.

Jeeps! You must be a lot older than me - can hardly remember that one :shock: :lol2:
Quote by Manolishi

*Swoon* and there was me thinking you were going to brush cobwebs off the Old Spice . . . lol
T-J

Never heard of the stuff!! redface
But you know me Red, anything that it takes........
Ok done some searching on the web - I might have a little white bottle in the attic!!
The lenghts I go to...........
Well, I think you'll find I'm worth it :P
T-J
Well, I think you'll find I'm worth it :P
T-J
If I ever had the oppertunity Hugo-Boss it is. Definately body spray as well, although not all over - it stings!! lol wink
Hi all
I regularly cut and file my nails and always shower immediately before going dogging. I hadn't considered aftershave or body lotion. What do you recommend ladies, I have either Brut or Old Spice (I bid on E-bay for some Hi-Karate but it went too high). Oh and I am really only 29.
I tell you something Mr and Mrs D that sounded like a damn good night up until that point. I mean where is the respect these days (apart from me of course).
Mrs NWC sorry to hear you are not well. Hope you are feeling better ASAP biggrin xxx
Regards
Harry Jones
How about getting your friendly Avon Rep around for some of those nasal exfoliating mens fragrances? Ladies love them.... don't they?? rolleyes {LordElpus pukes at the thought of getting a selection of them next Xmas :cry: }
Maybe we could have them deployed to the HBB's - a bit like napalm.... (and drag 'em to the vet for their anal glands to be expunged too lol )
Having been a 'dogger' and also a 'doggee' over some forty years I have always prided myself in turning up to any dogging session cleanly bathed, freshly shaven and scrupulously turned out. and my partner, when I have one with me, in the same condition.
It's good fun having a shared bath before going out (sometimes it's such good fun we didn't even get out that night. lol.)
I'm always careful to be fully groomed. There may be some ladies out there who like a 'bit of rough' but not many approve of a badly turned out man.
Sometimes you win sometimes you don't, but it's all part of the game. If your into licking double cream topped off with fresh fruit from a ladies body, leave that at home, not everyone appreciates it. lol.
Dogging is fun as long as you remember your manners, e,g, I may take my hat off to a lady, but I do leave the rubber one firmly in place. lol.
Harry0.
Casanova, Drunk, Naturalist and Dogger of this Parish.
Going out clean,well groomed and smart counts for a lot in all walks of life not just dogging,as i'm sure you all guys spend more time in the bathroom than women when they go out at the weekends,but don't seem to bother for the rest of the week(i'm not talking about us hygiene conscious SH members here but the general public). If you have no pride in your own appearance or general cleanliness and demeanour then how can you expect anyone else to?I see guys about every week who look like they could do with a good steamcleaning followed by a week in a rose let's face it, shape up or ship out.
Not listening to anything Shorter has twisted my noodle for the rest of the day.