London meet

16 Jan 2006

As relative newbies to the swing scene and having met no one on the forum yet who can verify us, Is it possible to meet someone just for a drink/lunch or even a coffee, We know a great little coffee place in convent garden.
We are in north london but would prefer to meet in central london preferably some weekend or tuesday,
Mornings may be possible other days.
We would be perfectly happy to try and organise something like a small meet but with more than one or two attendees, but here are a few problems I see
Newbs usually aren't highly regarded in any forum until they have proven themselves.
So who is realistically going to show up? Besides we wouldn't have the first clue on how to go about it, and yes I know there is a guide to it but there is surely an awful lot of info which only going to a munch can offer.
At the same time newbs aren't invited to larger munches until they have been proven.
Isn't this a catch 22? We think so.
We have allready met ppl but were informed through PM by a mod that it must be somone on the forum who is also known.
So please anyone preferably a CPL with Bi fem, cause we might like to take it further as a group.
We are very nice people and young, intelligent etc. And basically good company
So please don't hold the newb thing against us, and help us to get to more of you.
For anyone who chooses to meet and verify us thank you.

16 Jan 2006

wud meet b in day or eve ?
<~~ work day times
Mite b interested in meeting quite new here too
BBnDAVE
ad#456031

16 Jan 2006

Just sent you a PM BB n Dave

16 Jan 2006

Hi 8th,
Might be interested too, keep me in mind
Harry

17 Jan 2006

By the sound of things a few people here are interested.
So maybe we should reconsider and make it a more formal meet.
Of course We would have to meet verified people too.
Anyone have a problem with irish pubs?

17 Jan 2006

Count me in!

17 Jan 2006

hey 8thsinner
i'm a newbi too and completely agree, its the very epitome of a catch 22 - even more so for a single guy sad

i would love to make some more contacts and invariably friends, so if you'd invite me i'd be there!
great pics by the way :O) you lucky man!

17 Jan 2006

Hi, guys, I aggree with you that it's difficult to join experienced swingers parties and meets. I'm new to this so I'd like to join you guys when you have a party.
we could meet in my place but only on daytime.
Drop me some lines please

17 Jan 2006

A nice offer there but as a predominantly nebie munch, it may be best to meet in a reasonably public place, that way if anyone feels a tad awkward they can easily make their excuses and go or just slip off into the crowd
The Irish pub idea sounds good
Harry

17 Jan 2006

Thanks Steph, I should have added that as well...its been a long day banghead

Harry

18 Jan 2006

Okay well how does this sound to start off with.....
I can probably bring one couple in plus one single Bi girl that I have met allready....
I may be meeting a cpl later today. If that goes well that might be two cpls.
Thats a possible 7 so far.
We need at least two single women preferably three
Maybe two or three single guys
and another cpl
Bringing a total to maybe fifteen.
Which for a small meet I think is quite enough.
I know one place which will happily allow upto undressing and teasing but NO SEXUAL CONTACT on site. I have a lot of respect for the owners and have known them since they opened the place, I would name and shame anyone who broke their rules.
It is not licensed but it is public and near totenham court road. So it is fairly central.
Serves coffee's hot choclate cakes etc
15 in there might be crowded a bit but it is very comfortable and sexually open. With very good quality refreshments.
Personally I would have to arrange times to suit the people I have met so far, simply to make me feel a little more comfortable....
If there are more replies than venue can hold I will try to get a good mix of people and interests.
For those who have been to small meets does this sound like a good ratio of preferences etc?
If it is sucessful maybe there could be more, But I will have to see what happens with this one first.
And other ideas or general advice, warnings, opinions etc.......?

18 Jan 2006

i like the sound of this... would def' be up for a chance to say hi to everyone drinkies

18 Jan 2006

Quote by 8thsinner
Okay well how does this sound to start off with.....
I can probably bring one couple in plus one single Bi girl that I have met allready....
I may be meeting a cpl later today. If that goes well that might be two cpls.
Thats a possible 7 so far.
We need at least two single women preferably three
Maybe two or three single guys
and another cpl
Bringing a total to maybe fifteen.
Which for a small meet I think is quite enough.
I know one place which will happily allow upto undressing and teasing but NO SEXUAL CONTACT on site. I have a lot of respect for the owners and have known them since they opened the place, I would name and shame anyone who broke their rules.
It is not licensed but it is public and near totenham court road. So it is fairly central.
Serves coffee's hot choclate cakes etc
15 in there might be crowded a bit but it is very comfortable and sexually open. With very good quality refreshments.
Personally I would have to arrange times to suit the people I have met so far, simply to make me feel a little more comfortable....
If there are more replies than venue can hold I will try to get a good mix of people and interests.
For those who have been to small meets does this sound like a good ratio of preferences etc?
If it is sucessful maybe there could be more, But I will have to see what happens with this one first.
And other ideas or general advice, warnings, opinions etc.......?

I'm confused........is this a social meet, as in drinks and chat? or a meet with a certain level of play expected but in a cafe/bar of some kind?
It seems to have changed dramatically from the first post so clarification would be good wink

18 Jan 2006

You will also find that should you attempt to 'name and shame' in the open forum, you membership is likely to be withdrawn pretty damn sharpish!!
Don't try to do everything at the same time. If it's drinks and a chat, keep it just at that level. If you are wanting to 'play', make it very clear that that is the expectation. Nothing worse than giving out mixed messages, so take it easy as your first event.
Mal
wink

19 Jan 2006

Okay to clarify thing.
This would be a meet in a non licensed establishment, eg no alcohol.
There would be no sexual contact allowed on the meet site. If you wanna take someone home thats fine, but not at the meeting point.
I would ultimatly be responsible for the behavipour of people turning up. So if any one broke the rules of the site meet they would be named and shamed. If you can't deal with that it isnt my problem, if the site has a problem with knowing the names of those not responsible enough to admit their own mistakes then I feel sorry for the site.
Quite frankly I don't give a shit about getting a bad name for naming and shaming. If people don't have respect enough towards me for supplying a place to meet other newby swingers then those people should not be on the site.
SO...........
This will be a first meet in a relatively normal place which allows undressing up to underwear. They will not tolerate sexual activities onsite.
And I being under a very high responsibility I will not tolerate it also.
If anyone decides to go elsewhere and become sexually intimate then that is there choice. I certainly have no locations that I can offer that will allow it.
Anyone who knows of a place that allows sexual activity onsite then let me know, we can always take the SOCIAL gathering else where. After the social meet.
But I will not be held responsible for other peoples disrespect for me or the initial meet site owners.
I hope that is clear enough

19 Jan 2006

Hi 8thsinner
That's clear. Thanks for taking the initiative. I echo what you have to say about making contacts and getting accepted. I think your meet is a great idea. I would like to come and meet people too. Have you reached your limit on numbers yet?
I'm another Newbie to the forum (yes another one!) although I have been replying to ads for some time.
So Hello to everyone else who reads this.

19 Jan 2006

BTW
I appreciate every ones input to this thread.
and I also welcome constructive critiscsim...(drunk so can't spell)
If you have a problem with the way I see things.......then tell me, especially you mods.

19 Jan 2006

Have PM'd you.. wink

Sounds like fun...

Quote by 8thsinner
BTW
I appreciate every ones input to this thread.
and I also welcome constructive critiscsim...(drunk so can't spell)
If you have a problem with the way I see things.......then tell me, especially you mods.

19 Jan 2006

Quote by 8thsinner
As relative newbies to the swing scene and having met no one on the forum yet who can verify us, Is it possible to meet someone just for a drink/lunch or even a coffee, We know a great little coffee place in convent garden.
We are in north london but would prefer to meet in central london preferably some weekend or tuesday,
Mornings may be possible other days.
We would be perfectly happy to try and organise something like a small meet but with more than one or two attendees, but here are a few problems I see
Newbs usually aren't highly regarded in any forum until they have proven themselves.
So who is realistically going to show up? Besides we wouldn't have the first clue on how to go about it, and yes I know there is a guide to it but there is surely an awful lot of info which only going to a munch can offer.
At the same time newbs aren't invited to larger munches until they have been proven.
Isn't this a catch 22? We think so.
We have allready met ppl but were informed through PM by a mod that it must be somone on the forum who is also known.
So please anyone preferably a CPL with Bi fem, cause we might like to take it further as a group.
We are very nice people and young, intelligent etc. And basically good company
So please don't hold the newb thing against us, and help us to get to more of you.
For anyone who chooses to meet and verify us thank you.

Hi Guys have sent you PM and I too think its a great idea, for a social and a good laugh.
Dave

19 Jan 2006

hi
i am a spanish straight guy living in london and would like to join the meet if there is some place,
feel free to ask any question
cheers

19 Jan 2006

OK guys. bear in mind I have allready stated that the number of people with preferences, and I have allready got more than enough single guys wanting to go who have PM'd me.
Don't just mail me and say I would like to go.
I don't have time to read through all the profiles yet.
So send me details of what you are, I don't care about pics.
where you are, what you are looking for.
I still need single women and cpls to go.
If all I am getting is guys wanting to go then this isn't going to work.
All that does is save me a hell of a lot of time and trouble setting it up.
All those women out there who have only got pics and one liners, this is your chance to meet a few faces in a safe place.

19 Jan 2006

The only advice I can give is do not go down the line of naming and shaming as you may find your membership of this site in jeopardy. You are expecting people to stick by your rules/the rules of the venue, but in turn, you must also stick by the Swinging Heaven rules, where we dont name and shame (it has been discussed over and over and believe me, it is not worth it, big can of worms, not worth opening, and it is the right decision not to go down this line)
Personally as you are fairly new, I would start with a pure social event, were people come along for a chat, with no mention of arranging after social fun. That way you take pressure of people who may still be a little nervous, and it makes it easier for people if they can go away and think on what has happened/been said before they decide if they want to play.
Really wish you well with this, but dont try to do to much, to soom, keep it small and simple and most of all, dont give anyone any false expectations about any after social playing lol

19 Jan 2006

Quote by 8thsinner
OK guys. bear in mind I have allready stated that the number of people with preferences, and I have allready got more than enough single guys wanting to go who have PM'd me.
Don't just mail me and say I would like to go.
I don't have time to read through all the profiles yet.
So send me details of what you are, I don't care about pics.
where you are, what you are looking for.
I still need single women and cpls to go.
If all I am getting is guys wanting to go then this isn't going to work.
All that does is save me a hell of a lot of time and trouble setting it up.
All those women out there who have only got pics and one liners, this is your chance to meet a few faces in a safe place.

okay... a couple of thing that i am confused about still and since you are still new might need clarifying.... a munch is a social gathering... more like a big piss up with likeminded people than what you are suggesting...
also if you are denying people "because you have enough of a certain type of person" then in reality you are no better than the people you orginally complained about....
they say you are too new...
you say there are too many..
if you want to organise a meet... then call it a meet/private party...and that way people have a better idea of what they are signing up to....
for example... look at what you are proposing and what is trying to be organised.....here
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/69616.html
they are two different things....
sean xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

19 Jan 2006

And other ideas or general advice, warnings, opinions etc.......?

8thsinner, STOP !!!!!!!!! :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:

I can probably bring one couple in plus one single Bi girl that I have met allready....
I may be meeting a cpl later today. If that goes well that might be two cpls.
Thats a possible 7 so far.
We need at least two single women preferably three
Maybe two or three single guys
and another cpl

What are you doing?? I thought this was a social meet............ a chance for new members to have a chat in a non threatening environment to get to know other members?? confused

:?
Why are you trying to manipulate and label the type of people that are eligible for this meet?? It matters not one jot whether any woman there is Bi, or single, or there as part of a couple!! You are going there for a chat aren't you?? :? :? :?
As Fabio pointed out, by labelling people and then restricting which type of people can go you are doing the same as Organisers that say no Newbies.

I know one place which will happily allow upto undressing and teasing but NO SEXUAL CONTACT on site.

These people are Swingers, not sexually deranged animals. Do you really think people are going to start shagging in a Coffee shop in London in the middle of the day??? :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
You are sending out mixed messages and are coming across as being confused as to what you are trying to arrange. By doing so, you are confusing the Newbies that want to come along to meet you.
I wish you luck with your proposed meet, but please think about what the meeting is about and heed the advice that people are giving you here. If there is anything I can do to help please feel free to PM me.

I would ultimatly be responsible for the behavipour of people turning up. So if any one broke the rules of the site meet they would be named and shamed. If you can't deal with that it isnt my problem, if the site has a problem with knowing the names of those not responsible enough to admit their own mistakes then I feel sorry for the site.
Quite frankly I don't give a shit about getting a bad name for naming and shaming. If people don't have respect enough towards me for supplying a place to meet other newby swingers then those people should not be on the site.

Let me be quite clear on this!! :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
I will ban anybody that takes it upon themselves to Name and Shame anyone on this site. If anyone has a problem with another member then inform a Moderator by PM or Site Admin and we will deal with it.

19 Jan 2006

Quote by 8thsinner
SO...........
This will be a first meet in a relatively normal place which allows undressing up to underwear.
I hope that is clear enough

Its NOT a SOCIAL then !!
A social is a social ........... meeting for a drink and a chat !!
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I am not a Newbie ............. and dont want any Newbie to think that they need to undress to attend a Social .......... this simply isnt the case.
Proper SOCIAL's are exactly what they say on the tin ........... a social, a chance to meet and chat ............... I for one am worried about what you expect these Newbies to do at your so-called Social ?

19 Jan 2006

Quote by 8thsinner
Okay to clarify thing.
This would be a meet in a non licensed establishment, eg no alcohol.
There would be no sexual contact allowed on the meet site. If you wanna take someone home thats fine, but not at the meeting point.
I would ultimatly be responsible for the behavipour of people turning up. So if any one broke the rules of the site meet they would be named and shamed. If you can't deal with that it isnt my problem, if the site has a problem with knowing the names of those not responsible enough to admit their own mistakes then I feel sorry for the site.
Quite frankly I don't give a shit about getting a bad name for naming and shaming. If people don't have respect enough towards me for supplying a place to meet other newby swingers then those people should not be on the site.
SO...........
This will be a first meet in a relatively normal place which allows undressing up to underwear. They will not tolerate sexual activities onsite.
And I being under a very high responsibility I will not tolerate it also.
If anyone decides to go elsewhere and become sexually intimate then that is there choice. I certainly have no locations that I can offer that will allow it.
Anyone who knows of a place that allows sexual activity onsite then let me know, we can always take the SOCIAL gathering else where. After the social meet.
But I will not be held responsible for other peoples disrespect for me or the initial meet site owners.
I hope that is clear enough

Just a thought, how many places around the West End these days DON'T have CCTV filming inside - maybe you should check that?
I really can't imagine a reason that any place selling coffee and cakes (licenced or not) is happy for people to be stripping down to their underwear as a matter of course confused

20 Jan 2006

Sgt bilko, If I have trouble with people I will then PM a moderator.
You have a very good point.
As for the mixed messages I am sorry.
I am not intentionally suggesting that any one is sex mad, and likely to start shagging in the place.
The reason I said that the place will allow undressing. is....
I am trying to put across how open and comfortable the place is. It is not a sleezy place and I would be genuinely surprised if after going there people didn't go back because of that comfort level. And how nice the place actually is.
The reason I am trying to limit the types of people is probably two fold......
When we played in the fetish scene were got so sick of single guys, coming up in clubs and gropping my GF. So we avoided place with tons of single guys. For us that was extremely uncomfortable.
I am not suggesting that it happens in the swing side of things, I don't know what to expect yet.
I am trying to make sure the meet is comfortable.
Apart from the people who I said might be able to make it there are no women there at all.
And yes my partner and myself would like to meet more women,
But is there actually any point in 15 single guys who probably are looking for women going to a place to chat and relax with one couple?
This is my reasoning for limiting things to a certain number.
Is that the wrong attitude? I don't know.......
Oh almost forgot.
Serendipity
If you want to check out the place I am talking about why don't you join us there at the weekend. I think you would be surprised.
Or if you want the address I could PM it to you and you can check it out yourself. Having over fifteen hundred posts you probably know a hell of a lot more about this than I do.
But if you do decide to join us we can talk to the owners about the meet, and give the owners a more experienced opinion of what is what.
Just a thought.

20 Jan 2006

Quote by 8thsinner
Serendipity
If you want to check out the place I am talking about why don't you join us there at the weekend. I think you would be surprised.
Or if you want the address I could PM it to you and you can check it out yourself. Having over fifteen hundred posts you probably know a hell of a lot more about this than I do.
But if you do decide to join us we can talk to the owners about the meet, and give the owners a more experienced opinion of what is what.
Just a thought.

Nope, I don't know or claim to know more about organising a social - but I know London, which is why I mentioned the CCTV in so many places now. If you're organising it, you should def check that if you don't already know the answer for sure. My questions were posted as someone who is often in London and potentially interested in coming to a social meet!

20 Jan 2006

Quote by 8thsinner
Sgt bilko, If I have trouble with people I will then PM a moderator.
You have a very good point.
As for the mixed messages I am sorry.
I am not intentionally suggesting that any one is sex mad, and likely to start shagging in the place.
The reason I said that the place will allow undressing. is....
I am trying to put across how open and comfortable the place is. It is not a sleezy place and I would be genuinely surprised if after going there people didn't go back because of that comfort level. And how nice the place actually is.
The reason I am trying to limit the types of people is probably two fold......
When we played in the fetish scene were got so sick of single guys, coming up in clubs and gropping my GF. So we avoided place with tons of single guys. For us that was extremely uncomfortable.
I am not suggesting that it happens in the swing side of things, I don't know what to expect yet.
I am trying to make sure the meet is comfortable.
Apart from the people who I said might be able to make it there are no women there at all.
And yes my partner and myself would like to meet more women,
But is there actually any point in 15 single guys who probably are looking for women going to a place to chat and relax with one couple?
This is my reasoning for limiting things to a certain number.
Is that the wrong attitude? I don't know.......
Oh almost forgot.
Serendipity
If you want to check out the place I am talking about why don't you join us there at the weekend. I think you would be surprised.
Or if you want the address I could PM it to you and you can check it out yourself. Having over fifteen hundred posts you probably know a hell of a lot more about this than I do.
But if you do decide to join us we can talk to the owners about the meet, and give the owners a more experienced opinion of what is what.
Just a thought.

Hi There
I have to say that I am little confused, I would love to come along and meet some guys, girls and couples etc but am I to think that I can now not come as I am a single guy from Essex?
I was really looking forward to having a drink and a laugh with likeminded people. I have to agree with fabio that I am still being excluded for being new and single. Please dont see this as a begging expression to come along but the initial post did seem to look really good for me and all the other single males who are new. However now looks like I am still at the back of the ever increasing queue.
Ok rant over, hope you have a great time guys and do post up how things went etc.
Dave

20 Jan 2006

Sod it all, its getting far to confusing lets all meet in the pub for a social chat and keep our clothes on, mines a G&T lol

Harry