Newbie MUNCH anyone?

11 Dec 2005

Hi all.
First of all let us introduce ourselves - we are a newbie swinging couple, and so far have only attended one swing-party (didn't much like it), and have had no luck with the online-dating thing so far. To be fair we haven't yet tried the ads on this site, but had a horrible time on some other sites we paid for - all were awash with time-wasters or people just not right for us. We had a few good moments at the swinging club, but found it a bit too rushed and felt uncomfortable at times - again it just isn't for us. However, we've had a few good moments in all, and still believe good honest sexy fun can be had if we meet the right people!
Which brings me onto the subject of my post here - the MUNCH idea looks great! We would absolutely love to be in a place were we could meet like-minded couples that we can just talk to without any pressure, and if we get on well then great - who knows what smile

The problem for us is that being newbies, we're not allowed to attend a MUNCH because we haven't been members of this site for long or posted anything (until now), so we need to wait a while, which is very frustrating! Now we understand the reasons behind the policy of only allowing "known" members to such events, but it makes things quite difficult for honest newbies that just want to meet like-minded people face-to-face without there being any assumptions or expectations of immediate hard-core sex, as is generally the case in clubs or via ads.
Well, if anyone is interested in meeting up for a non-offical-MUNCH - lets call it a "NEWBIE-MUNCH" let us know (we're London based). We were thinking of simply meeting up at at a club in Central London. I'm calling it an "NEWBIE-MUNCH" so as not to to cause confusion or offend those great people on this forum that run the the real MUNCH events!
Also, we would much appreciate feedback from the "proper" MUNCH organizers - is this a terrible idea, or can you think of a better idea or way forward for us poor newbies?
Thanks all for reading this post, and please let me know what you think about it - good, bad, or indifferent - just try and keep it constructive please!
Cheers,
D&E

11 Dec 2005

Hey
I am also a newbie and so empathise with your situation. For what its worth I think your idea is a good one, the only thing that I would say is a club might not be the best place to begin, as people will probably go off and do their own thing once inside. I think a place where you can actually get to know those who you're meeting, a bar say, might be a better STARTING point.
Of course I would love to join you but Im in Birmingham.
Anyway good luck with it!!!

11 Dec 2005

The only thing I would say is don't use the word Munch. That sort of meet has a specific status here - for the reasons you have acknowledged.
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/terminology/munch.html
It also means that Munches are 'stickied' (permanently located at the top) of the Let's Meet Up (LMU) forum. To do that you need the formal sanction of the Mods and you won't get it for this meet.
There's nothing wrong with what you're doing but this sort of meet is usually called a Social around here. Best to rename it that I think. You have made the nature of the meeting clear in your post - you need to make everyone who's coming is aware.
I suppose another comment is why restrict it to newcomers? One of the real pleasures on this site is meeting up with people, who you've got to know over the weeks/months. Pitching up at an open venue as you've suggested to 'talk sex' with a bunch of strangers may be a bit strained and a bit strange. wink

It doesn't take long to get youreslves known around this place as long as you put some effort in and then the whole shebang is open to you.
This thread may well be moved the the LMU forum by a mod.
HTH.

11 Dec 2005

I'll have my say now..... don't worry!!! not going to rip you to pieces honest...
The one thing i would say to newbies ever contemplating trying to organise one is talk to someone who actually has.....
Trust me they are so much work, and what i would generally say to people first to go to one to see on what scale these have now become.......
for example there were 80-90 people at the north east munch, 50-60 at the glasgow munch... 130-140 at the wigan munch....
i know newbies find it frustrating because they find SH as a brilliant resource and want to join in as soon as possible, I think what the wait does unwittinging is seperate the patient from the Gwapers.....and it the meantime you get to know people and characters (in a way would you want to get an instant invite and them be in a place when you didn't know 100+ people.... I am sure you would feel incredibly uncomfortable)
If you want to organise a little social the by all means go for it.... but bear a couple of things in minds, one of those is that you are so new! why should they trust you be able to organise something???
just to give you a heads up on something......a respected memeber tried to organise a munch/social in london a little while back... and she allowed "newbies" to put names down.... she had 95 on the list......29 turned up!!!!! and most of those who no-showed... newbies!!! so it does go both ways.........
If you do want any advice then by all means pm me and i'll try to help as much as possible
Sean xxxxxx

11 Dec 2005

anyone can do a social meet, if you want to arrange a meet in a pub just open a thread asking who wants to go, problem is as new people i doubt many people will want to go, trust goes a very long way in this game and no bodys going to want to go to a social to talk to new people only to find out their stories in next weeks local papers gossip collum!
so altho you are within your right to open a thread for a social meet my advice would be hang about for a while and go to a proper munch

11 Dec 2005

Hi Letstryit, welcome to the forums, or should I say madhouse lol

If you are serious about setting up a 'social' for newbies then I really do hope it works out. I wont use the term munch, mainly because on this site, the term munch is used for a social event that is not restricted to only 'new' people. Some restrictions are sometimes put on about who can attend, but that is mainly to ensure that everyone who attends is genuine and not someone who just joined the forums a few days earlier and want to just come along and have a good look!
The advice that Fabio and Tune have given is very good, but be warned, it is a lot of hard work getting it all sorted, arranging suitable venues, badges, invites, hotel lists etc etc etc. I would also take into account the comments made by Naughty Nymphos. She is right when she says that a lot of people would rather go to munches/socials arranged by well known members but there is always an exception, and some newer members may prefer something arranged be a fellow 'newbie;.
Whatever you decide, I really hope it works out and you have a good night. biggrin

11 Dec 2005

I've already tossed around the idea of a similar idea, whereby a regular can organise a local event with no more than say a dozen invited. The majority being newbies with no experience of a Munch, but with 2 or 3 regulars to tell them what goes on. These to be run on a regular basis around the country. The basic premis that it is specifically for newbies with a couple of regs, and not just a social for a load of regs to get together, they can do these anytime.
Due to other commitments and I believe something like Christmas just around the corner, I didn't want to kick this off until the New Year, but I think it can work. Once into next year I'll try and get it started properly and see what feedback we get, both from organisers and newbies.
Mal

11 Dec 2005

oooo fab - can I be brown owl please? wink

11 Dec 2005

Brilliant idea Mal, and I am sure it would be a success.
When we did our first munch, we were relative 'newbies' and had only been on the site a couple of months, had never been to a munch and didnt realise just how much work it would actually be!
Luckily for us, a brilliant bunch of 50 odd members turned up on the night and we all had a great time. The second munch was a little larger and we got approx 90 people who came but the last one was the best with over 130 people attending from all over the country. However, it did not make it easy for people to chat, and it was more of a party than the chance for people to sit down, talk and ask questions.
Mal, if you need a 'secretary' for any of the Munches you are thinking of, just give me a shout if I can help out in anyway biggrin

11 Dec 2005

Thanks guys.
As I said, let's get into the New Year and see what we can do.
Mal

11 Dec 2005

Thanks for the feedback all - good to see this forum is alive and clearly people care about this place.
All points taken in, it seems I have underestimated the effort and risks involved! Since a few people have also mentioned the potencial risks involved I can see why. I did read the page about offical MUNCH parties, but didn't realise they were so big either - 100+ at some, when I was imagining 10-20 people!
I understand completely that arranging a social for newbies-only is unlikely to work. To be fair when I came up with the idea of a newbie-MUNCH - I was thinking more along the lines of a social were newbies were also allowed and certainly wouldn't bar experienced MUNCHers.
Now, knowing what I now I'm a bit nervous about arranging such a social, but may rethink it in the New Year. I was still thinking something much smaller than MUNCH events mind - more like 10-20 couples, but perhaps there is a good reason the MUNCH events are so big that I have missed?
Mal, you've clearly been looking into this kind of idea too - so if you do arrange something it would be fantastic! If you need any help/support/etc, please let me know and I'll try to help.
Cheers all!

11 Dec 2005

Would be def up for that !!!
As a fellow newbieish (member around 8 weeks now) it is very hard to communicate with regular members of the fourm, without being pushy and TOO up front !!!!
Most people that i have "chatted" with seam and probably are just normal down to earth boys and girls
Please keep me informed when dates and venues are confirmed
Robbie
PS
Hope to have a pic on here soon

11 Dec 2005

Quote by letstryit
I understand completely that arranging a social for newbies-only is unlikely to work. To be fair when I came up with the idea of a newbie-MUNCH - I was thinking more along the lines of a social were newbies were also allowed and certainly wouldn't bar experienced MUNCHers.

No No No, please dont think it wouldnt work, and I do think it is an excellent idea, just wanted you to be aware that the 'take up' might not be as big as it would be if you were opening it up to all members.
Definately worth trying something, even if it is just a little get to gether in a local pub. PM me if I can be of any help.

Quote by robbiem1303
As a fellow newbieish (member around 8 weeks now) it is very hard to communicate with regular members of the fourm, without being pushy and TOO up front !!!!

Robbie, please, please, please dont ever think you are being to pushy or up front by chatting to us sad gits who are always on here lol

It is people like yourselves (dare I call you a newbie) who bring a breath of fresh air to the site, bring new ideas, new laughs and new avatars wink

Remember we were all newbies at some stage, and some of us would rather forget our first posts :wink: :wink: