I have a 14" penis and will give you the fuck of your life!
Must be prepared to offer me guarenteed sex, none of this kissing, touching and a blow. Must be horny, shaven, blonde hair, 48DD tits, no-one over 21 considered. Must go bareback, take it up the ass, swallow cum and pay for the hotel.
Your TWAT must taste line creme de menthe, and you MUST NOT have a hairy arse hole!!!!!!!!
Preference will be given to those with pierced clits.
Must be prepared to have video made (so I can show to all the lads later).
Must be prepared to behave like a complete whore and get nothing else out of this than a belly full of cum.
Might bring one or two of my mates with me, so you would have to fuck them too.
Had loads and loads of responses to messages in the past with this title, so cum get it whilst its hot!
Must live no more than 100yds from my local hotel as I can't be arsed travelling.
.....Oh and by the way, must be discreet. I have a bird and she'd kill me if she found out I was dicking another lass, especially after I got her best mate up the duff and all that.
PLEASE FUCK ME I'M AS DESPERATE AS HELL AND MY GIRLFRIND WON'T TOUCH ME TILL I GET RID OF THE CRABS.
If you're not 21 but look it (up to a maximum of 24) and dye your hair (convincingly blonde) I may as a last resort consider you!
Cheers mate
DICK HEAD DAVE!
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Sexy women wanted for S Yorks Super-Stallion!
if only your dick was bigger! I was ok with all the other stuff!!!
ah well ill have to keep looking lol
ah well ill have to keep looking lol
Oh i think im in love 
:lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: :laughabove: 
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Oh God. Thanks for that mate; hardest I've laughed all weekend.
Classic.
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Oh God. Thanks for that mate; hardest I've laughed all weekend.
Classic.
Sex God
ermmmmm can i be at the front of the queue? gosh he sounds like the man of my dreams
Quote by freckledbird
ermmmmm can i be at the front of the queue? gosh he sounds like the man of my dreams
No i was first bugger off
:lol2: 
Sex God
dream on. :lol:
:lol:
Sex God
No i was first bugger off
well Clare. maybe we could share him, he certainly sounds as if he's man enough to take us both on at once doesn't he? please say yes hun, i'll be soooo disappointed if i can't be near the top of his list
Quote by freckledbird
No i was first bugger off
well Clare. maybe we could share him, he certainly sounds as if he's man enough to take us both on at once doesn't he? please say yes hun, i'll be soooo disappointed if i can't be near the top of his list
Oh FFS if i have to
Sex God
maybe he'd allow us time to play on our own whilst he recovers between seeing to us both? Recovery time.... what's that!?
After 12 Viagra's.... I'm rock hard for a week. Bit uncomfortable at work tho'
Anyway, I'll take you both at the same time....... I always find one bird gets knackered out too soon. Could really do with half a dozen at once to satisfy me, doing a kind of relay race, only groping for my enourmous baton!!!!!!!
Dave xx
After 12 Viagra's.... I'm rock hard for a week. Bit uncomfortable at work tho'
Anyway, I'll take you both at the same time....... I always find one bird gets knackered out too soon. Could really do with half a dozen at once to satisfy me, doing a kind of relay race, only groping for my enourmous baton!!!!!!!
Dave xx
