It always pays to check who you're meeting....
:sad:
Orgasminator
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A cautionary tale..
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Sex God
Oh shit! That's a scary story!
Not sure how you could ever check anyone out to such a degree though. I guess we all take our chances and have to trust people.
Not sure how you could ever check anyone out to such a degree though. I guess we all take our chances and have to trust people.
Orgasminator
Only me trying to find their profile to ask for an invite to the next party then??? :rascal:
"ooh whack another blast of that bear spray on my nuts" :twisted:
"ooh whack another blast of that bear spray on my nuts" :twisted:
Sex God
Some people just don't know how to enjoy themselves.....all that ganja an' they went fer the bear repellent....it must be a scottish thing 
Can't find that cottage on the google map ffs.
Can't find that cottage on the google map ffs.
Sex God
Quote by Ben_Minx
Bloody amateurs, obviously you tie em up before you get the mace out. If only they had joined my extreme bondage group.
:rotflmao::rotflmao:couple of months ago I had a guy visit me here....I told him he wasn't coming in wiv a can o' stella in his hand...I relented when he disposed of the beer. He was very quiet, too reserved really, stayed just over half an hour...wanted to stay longer .. wanted to go get some beer and some drugs and come back....I said no fanks and he feked off.
I saw 'is pic on the telly followin night...he was a convicted murderer who had absconded from a low security mental institution. Well they have to be nuts to come visit me!
Sex God
Quote by skinny
couple of months ago I had a guy visit me here....I told him he wasn't coming in wiv a can o' stella in his hand...I relented when he disposed of the beer. He was very quiet, too reserved really, stayed just over half an hour...wanted to stay longer .. wanted to go get some beer and some drugs and come back....I said no fanks and he feked off.
I saw 'is pic on the telly followin night...he was a convicted murderer who had absconded from a low security mental institution. Well they have to be nuts to come visit me!
Hopes to G*d this story is true. Not that it was particularly nice for you at the time Skinny, obviously? Just it's a good tale for the possible future niece(s) and / or nephew(s) ((( looking like twins, keep yer fingers crossed for me sis! ))) about the stranger dangers of drink and drugs. When they're looking at me gone out waving the skunks and horse tranquilisers about being all hip and cool I'll be telling 'em to talk to Skinny, see what could 'appen to yer.
Sex God
Rediculous story. An orgy with three people? Since when?
Everyone who knows anything about anything would call that a threesome.
Skinny, your story is genuinely scary. I'm glad nothing worse happened and that you are left with just a cool story to tell.
Everyone who knows anything about anything would call that a threesome.
Skinny, your story is genuinely scary. I'm glad nothing worse happened and that you are left with just a cool story to tell.
Sex God
Quote by 4playinc
I told him he wasn't coming in wiv a can o' stella in his hand...
absconded from a low security mental institution. Well they have to be nuts to come visit me!
I Thought you where complaining it was just the one CAN OF STELLA GOTTA SHARE SURELY
:rotflmao::rotflmao:good to know my friends are concerned for my welfare.
Sexlightened
Skinny - how the hell did you get in touch with this loon, if he was escaped then did you find him at a bus stop?
Sorry, not funny and definitely scary.
I met a guy from a swinging site - who ended up dragging me back by my hair in a bar after I told him I didn't want to see him any more - I punched him and left.
On the way home he texted and called my 'play' mobile, my personal mobile and my work phone - the last two he should not have had.
He called for three days - every three minutes - then he emailed me at work and phoned my desk number.
Next day...
He turned up at my work - with a teddy and a creepy card left at reception - he was sitting outside THREE hours after I went down to get it staring at the doors. I copied the card and sent it all back by courier to his office - with a letter - clearly telling him to stop harassing me or I would go to the police.
I didn't tell him what I did or where I worked, even after two months of random meets as I am VERY cautious.
That weekend he turned up at my flat - again - he didn't know where I lived, or even what area of London - he asked to be let in - my then flatmates thought he was a random ex - I said just tell him to fuck off - he barged past two of them and into my bedroom with flowers - after I had told him in no UNCERTAIN terms to keep the fuck away from me. I got up and went NUTS pushing him out - my flatmates pushed him out the door and he lurked outside for three hours - I moved house shortly afterwards to be safe.
He had stalked me for two weeks. Was he nuts - definitely - could you tell NOOO
- He had a PHD from Oxford and was a senior correspondent for a national newspaper.
I emailed him at work with copies of his increasingly wierd and threatening emails and letters, citing his behaviour and told him that if I EVER heard from him again in ANY capacity - all the evidence was going to two papers - a tabloid - and the editor of the broadsheet he writes for.
RESULT - Silence.
People are scary and swinging can be risky, it is best to take precautions.
- Ask to see the person on cam WHILE speaking to them on the phone.
- By a cheap and disposable mobile as your 'play' phone so you can ditch the sim card if someone gets wierd - keep a note of regular and trusted contacts in a notebook.
- Always meet with someone in a public place to see what you think of them - do not go to someone's home alone without meeting them first and do not invite someone to your home that you do not know.
- If you can afford it the first time you play - get a hotel room - there will be people in the room next to you.
- I as a rule to not play with people on a first meet, I make it social and it gives me time to see what I think of them.
- If from a particular site - see if you can get someone you know or have met to vouch for them.
- Walk away at ANY point you have concerns.
As you can see my 'rules' are bourne of the above and other utterly scary/random meets.
It pays to be patient. If someone I am writing to or corresponding with gets pushy or odd before I meet them, they are deleted - if someone is odd at a social drink - I leave.
If someone I am playing with makes me feel uncomfortable - I leave.
Sorry for the essay I write way too quickly.
SCARY STUFF
Be safe all, Amber xxx
Sorry, not funny and definitely scary.
I met a guy from a swinging site - who ended up dragging me back by my hair in a bar after I told him I didn't want to see him any more - I punched him and left.
On the way home he texted and called my 'play' mobile, my personal mobile and my work phone - the last two he should not have had.
He called for three days - every three minutes - then he emailed me at work and phoned my desk number.
Next day...
He turned up at my work - with a teddy and a creepy card left at reception - he was sitting outside THREE hours after I went down to get it staring at the doors. I copied the card and sent it all back by courier to his office - with a letter - clearly telling him to stop harassing me or I would go to the police.
I didn't tell him what I did or where I worked, even after two months of random meets as I am VERY cautious.
That weekend he turned up at my flat - again - he didn't know where I lived, or even what area of London - he asked to be let in - my then flatmates thought he was a random ex - I said just tell him to fuck off - he barged past two of them and into my bedroom with flowers - after I had told him in no UNCERTAIN terms to keep the fuck away from me. I got up and went NUTS pushing him out - my flatmates pushed him out the door and he lurked outside for three hours - I moved house shortly afterwards to be safe.
He had stalked me for two weeks. Was he nuts - definitely - could you tell NOOO
- He had a PHD from Oxford and was a senior correspondent for a national newspaper.
I emailed him at work with copies of his increasingly wierd and threatening emails and letters, citing his behaviour and told him that if I EVER heard from him again in ANY capacity - all the evidence was going to two papers - a tabloid - and the editor of the broadsheet he writes for.
RESULT - Silence.
People are scary and swinging can be risky, it is best to take precautions.
- Ask to see the person on cam WHILE speaking to them on the phone.
- By a cheap and disposable mobile as your 'play' phone so you can ditch the sim card if someone gets wierd - keep a note of regular and trusted contacts in a notebook.
- Always meet with someone in a public place to see what you think of them - do not go to someone's home alone without meeting them first and do not invite someone to your home that you do not know.
- If you can afford it the first time you play - get a hotel room - there will be people in the room next to you.
- I as a rule to not play with people on a first meet, I make it social and it gives me time to see what I think of them.
- If from a particular site - see if you can get someone you know or have met to vouch for them.
- Walk away at ANY point you have concerns.
As you can see my 'rules' are bourne of the above and other utterly scary/random meets.
It pays to be patient. If someone I am writing to or corresponding with gets pushy or odd before I meet them, they are deleted - if someone is odd at a social drink - I leave.
If someone I am playing with makes me feel uncomfortable - I leave.
Sorry for the essay I write way too quickly.
SCARY STUFF
Be safe all, Amber xxx
Orgasminator
Couple of chilling tales in the topic now :uhoh:
Never had any major issues - a few creepies but nothing as scary as Skinny or Amber describe. I can understand how that would be very stressful.
I have the advantage of being able to act completely bonkers too, when I feel the need
I think I would enjoy a game of stalker chicken :twisted:
Never had any major issues - a few creepies but nothing as scary as Skinny or Amber describe. I can understand how that would be very stressful.
I have the advantage of being able to act completely bonkers too, when I feel the need
I think I would enjoy a game of stalker chicken :twisted:
Sexlightened
How do you stalk a chicken - I am intrigued...
Orgasminator
Quote by ambervixen
How do you stalk a chicken - I am intrigued...
You have just got to follow it across the road and get to the other side :giggle:
sorry, couldnt help myself
Casanova
:-o ambervixen, scary stuff. The irony of it is that... none of the proposed points in your piece of advice would have protected you from the person that stalked you (seeing that you hadn't shared real-life contact details, already had made an assessment/met him etc... so as you say, you just couldn't tell).
The scariest case I have heard was through a friend here, whose play partner (a single woman) was pretty much battered, if not , during a 1-on-1 meet with a man she met on this very site. What I find so upsetting about this is that... the man that did this to her has most certainly done it to other women and will do it again. He is right here on this site and must be charming/convincing/appearing trustworthy enough to have deceived this woman, who I know to be clever and discerning. It infuriates me to think of people that would try this on, and get away with it, too
The scariest case I have heard was through a friend here, whose play partner (a single woman) was pretty much battered, if not , during a 1-on-1 meet with a man she met on this very site. What I find so upsetting about this is that... the man that did this to her has most certainly done it to other women and will do it again. He is right here on this site and must be charming/convincing/appearing trustworthy enough to have deceived this woman, who I know to be clever and discerning. It infuriates me to think of people that would try this on, and get away with it, too
Sexlightened
Quote by ambervixen
Skinny - how the hell did you get in touch with this loon, if he was escaped then did you find him at a bus stop?
Sorry, not funny and definitely scary.
I met a guy from a swinging site - who ended up dragging me back by my hair in a bar after I told him I didn't want to see him any more - I punched him and left.
On the way home he texted and called my 'play' mobile, my personal mobile and my work phone - the last two he should not have had.
He called for three days - every three minutes - then he emailed me at work and phoned my desk number.
Next day...
He turned up at my work - with a teddy and a creepy card left at reception - he was sitting outside THREE hours after I went down to get it staring at the doors. I copied the card and sent it all back by courier to his office - with a letter - clearly telling him to stop harassing me or I would go to the police.
I didn't tell him what I did or where I worked, even after two months of random meets as I am VERY cautious.
That weekend he turned up at my flat - again - he didn't know where I lived, or even what area of London - he asked to be let in - my then flatmates thought he was a random ex - I said just tell him to fuck off - he barged past two of them and into my bedroom with flowers - after I had told him in no UNCERTAIN terms to keep the fuck away from me. I got up and went NUTS pushing him out - my flatmates pushed him out the door and he lurked outside for three hours - I moved house shortly afterwards to be safe.
He had stalked me for two weeks. Was he nuts - definitely - could you tell NOOO
- He had a PHD from Oxford and was a senior correspondent for a national newspaper.
I emailed him at work with copies of his increasingly wierd and threatening emails and letters, citing his behaviour and told him that if I EVER heard from him again in ANY capacity - all the evidence was going to two papers - a tabloid - and the editor of the broadsheet he writes for.
RESULT - Silence.
People are scary and swinging can be risky, it is best to take precautions.
- Ask to see the person on cam WHILE speaking to them on the phone.
- By a cheap and disposable mobile as your 'play' phone so you can ditch the sim card if someone gets wierd - keep a note of regular and trusted contacts in a notebook.
- Always meet with someone in a public place to see what you think of them - do not go to someone's home alone without meeting them first and do not invite someone to your home that you do not know.
- If you can afford it the first time you play - get a hotel room - there will be people in the room next to you.
- I as a rule to not play with people on a first meet, I make it social and it gives me time to see what I think of them.
- If from a particular site - see if you can get someone you know or have met to vouch for them.
- Walk away at ANY point you have concerns.
As you can see my 'rules' are bourne of the above and other utterly scary/random meets.
It pays to be patient. If someone I am writing to or corresponding with gets pushy or odd before I meet them, they are deleted - if someone is odd at a social drink - I leave.
If someone I am playing with makes me feel uncomfortable - I leave.
Sorry for the essay I write way too quickly.
SCARY STUFF
Be safe all, Amber xxx
A story that changes every time it is dragged out....
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopicpage/101241/20.html
Sexlightened
Quote by Dave__Notts
A story that changes every time it is dragged out....
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopicpage/101241/20.html
It was very similar to get the gist it is the same story
Dave_Notts
Disagree Dave.
No mention of punching him and leaving in the 2012 version.
2012 version 'On the way home he texted and called my 'play' mobile, my personal mobile and my work phone - the last two he should not have had.'
2007 version 'Any way, after that I called him on the way home to say, you know you are getting a bit intense and maybe we ought to cool things down a bit, after all I entered into this to meet friends and to have a bit of fun, but not to meet anyone serous or to have any problems. '
2012 version 'On the way home he texted and called my 'play' mobile, my personal mobile and my work phone - the last two he should not have had.'
2007 version 'He doesn't have my actual 'personal' number - I'm not that silly, but I have two swinging numbers, one for people I trust and another for people I don't trust. '
2012 version 'I didn't tell him what I did or where I worked, even after two months of random meets as I am VERY cautious. '
2007 version 'The only reason he had my work email address was because he did some research for me on a new job I have (started today with no sleep whatsoever - not good!!) '
2012 version 'I didn't tell him what I did or where I worked, even after two months of random meets as I am VERY cautious'
2007 version 'I told him about 2 days ago that I didn't want to see him again intimately and that we ought to be friends, after he pulled my hair in public when he didn't like the way the conversation was going - ok during sex but not in a bar where I fecking work!!! '
Should I continue?
Sex God
Quote by s3xyl3xy
Skinny - how the hell did you get in touch with this loon, if he was escaped then did you find him at a bus stop?
Sorry, not funny and definitely scary.
I met a guy from a swinging site - who ended up dragging me back by my hair in a bar after I told him I didn't want to see him any more - I punched him and left.
On the way home he texted and called my 'play' mobile, my personal mobile and my work phone - the last two he should not have had.
He called for three days - every three minutes - then he emailed me at work and phoned my desk number.
Next day...
He turned up at my work - with a teddy and a creepy card left at reception - he was sitting outside THREE hours after I went down to get it staring at the doors. I copied the card and sent it all back by courier to his office - with a letter - clearly telling him to stop harassing me or I would go to the police.
I didn't tell him what I did or where I worked, even after two months of random meets as I am VERY cautious.
That weekend he turned up at my flat - again - he didn't know where I lived, or even what area of London - he asked to be let in - my then flatmates thought he was a random ex - I said just tell him to fuck off - he barged past two of them and into my bedroom with flowers - after I had told him in no UNCERTAIN terms to keep the fuck away from me. I got up and went NUTS pushing him out - my flatmates pushed him out the door and he lurked outside for three hours - I moved house shortly afterwards to be safe.
He had stalked me for two weeks. Was he nuts - definitely - could you tell NOOO
- He had a PHD from Oxford and was a senior correspondent for a national newspaper.
I emailed him at work with copies of his increasingly wierd and threatening emails and letters, citing his behaviour and told him that if I EVER heard from him again in ANY capacity - all the evidence was going to two papers - a tabloid - and the editor of the broadsheet he writes for.
RESULT - Silence.
People are scary and swinging can be risky, it is best to take precautions.
- Ask to see the person on cam WHILE speaking to them on the phone.
- By a cheap and disposable mobile as your 'play' phone so you can ditch the sim card if someone gets wierd - keep a note of regular and trusted contacts in a notebook.
- Always meet with someone in a public place to see what you think of them - do not go to someone's home alone without meeting them first and do not invite someone to your home that you do not know.
- If you can afford it the first time you play - get a hotel room - there will be people in the room next to you.
- I as a rule to not play with people on a first meet, I make it social and it gives me time to see what I think of them.
- If from a particular site - see if you can get someone you know or have met to vouch for them.
- Walk away at ANY point you have concerns.
As you can see my 'rules' are bourne of the above and other utterly scary/random meets.
It pays to be patient. If someone I am writing to or corresponding with gets pushy or odd before I meet them, they are deleted - if someone is odd at a social drink - I leave.
If someone I am playing with makes me feel uncomfortable - I leave.
Sorry for the essay I write way too quickly.
SCARY STUFF
Be safe all, Amber xxx
A story that changes every time it is dragged out....
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopicpage/101241/20.html
and ya point is s3xyl3xy im not really getting what your trying to point out :huh:
Quote by s3xyl3xy
A story that changes every time it is dragged out....
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopicpage/101241/20.html
It was very similar to get the gist it is the same story
Dave_Notts
Should I continue?
The story layout remains the same but the detail does differ. Is this because of the time difference in writing? This is why witness accounts have a lesser weighting as evidence as people cannot always remember exactly what happened, or over time they remember something different or a memory comes back due to being blocked out at first.
Dave_Notts
Sexpert
I'm not disputing the similarity between the tales; and it doesn't matter whether thr story comes from 2007/2011/2012 etc What matters are the lessons we learn from those stories.
Thankfully we've not had a stalker, but we do follow some of the precautions Amberfox suggests:-
An old mobile with a pay-as-you-go sim for play contacts (backed up by a notebook, with comments on those we've met).
Having had some truely dreadful meets and no shows, we decided on a no exceptions rule - we only meet at club for the first meet. That way if the person we are meeting doesn't turn up or gets stage fright or isn't what we expected, we can still have some fun. When we explain that to potential meets, most people seem to understand our stance. Of course meeting at a club has the added advantage of safety.
Personally we avoid adverts that state they want regular meets/friendships/relationships - we have a relationship - with each other. We only want occasional playmates. Those wanting more than a play can form attachements and become clingy.
It is very easy for someone to pretend to be someone they aren't on the internet. Pictures on profiles may well not be of the person you are meeting.
Swinging is supposed to be fun - but use common sense and your gut instinct.
Lecture over.
Thankfully we've not had a stalker, but we do follow some of the precautions Amberfox suggests:-
An old mobile with a pay-as-you-go sim for play contacts (backed up by a notebook, with comments on those we've met).
Having had some truely dreadful meets and no shows, we decided on a no exceptions rule - we only meet at club for the first meet. That way if the person we are meeting doesn't turn up or gets stage fright or isn't what we expected, we can still have some fun. When we explain that to potential meets, most people seem to understand our stance. Of course meeting at a club has the added advantage of safety.
Personally we avoid adverts that state they want regular meets/friendships/relationships - we have a relationship - with each other. We only want occasional playmates. Those wanting more than a play can form attachements and become clingy.
It is very easy for someone to pretend to be someone they aren't on the internet. Pictures on profiles may well not be of the person you are meeting.
Swinging is supposed to be fun - but use common sense and your gut instinct.
Lecture over.
Sexlightened
S3xyl3xy,
I have to admit that I don't quite get your point either. You have, by the way misquoted the years and made an erroneous reference - which for me proves how petty and irrelevant it is to 'nitpick' with posts.
I do not 'drag out' this particular scenario of my life, I mention it very rarely when I think it might be beneficial as a cautionary tale, which in this instance seemed relevant.
You are welcome to your point of view s3xyl3xy, I am just unclear as to what exactly you were trying to point out.
As others have noted, the details are essentially the same. I did not, unlike you go back and check my first post in detail to check in minutae the details.
This is something which happened about six years ago - and it is an upsetting topic - so forgive me for not cross referencing details. I wrote it from memory and quickly, it was an overview of a stressful time in my life, I was trying to give a brief idea of the situation.
I am sorry, this seemed like a rather personal and left-field post s3xyl3xy due to the fact that all you said was "A story that changes every time it is dragged out.... ".
I will finish writing now, but I felt the need to respond.
Amber
I have to admit that I don't quite get your point either. You have, by the way misquoted the years and made an erroneous reference - which for me proves how petty and irrelevant it is to 'nitpick' with posts.
I do not 'drag out' this particular scenario of my life, I mention it very rarely when I think it might be beneficial as a cautionary tale, which in this instance seemed relevant.
You are welcome to your point of view s3xyl3xy, I am just unclear as to what exactly you were trying to point out.
As others have noted, the details are essentially the same. I did not, unlike you go back and check my first post in detail to check in minutae the details.
This is something which happened about six years ago - and it is an upsetting topic - so forgive me for not cross referencing details. I wrote it from memory and quickly, it was an overview of a stressful time in my life, I was trying to give a brief idea of the situation.
I am sorry, this seemed like a rather personal and left-field post s3xyl3xy due to the fact that all you said was "A story that changes every time it is dragged out.... ".
I will finish writing now, but I felt the need to respond.
Amber
