A Positive Post About Newbie PM's

14 Jan 2006

I know we've all had a jolly good moan over the last few weeks about newbies pm'ing us. There are few who have escaped the *wanna shag* brigade, but I wanted to let everyone know that there is a positive side to some of it smile

We have had zillions . . . well ok, slight exaggeration there, but loads anyway . . . of pm's from newbies recently.
Some have been absolute bollox, some not even worth the time it took to read them, but in amongst them all, we have found some really nice people biggrin

Often, they are not local to us looking to meet, or looking for anything other than to say Hi, but since they are articulate, polite and chatty is is a real pleasure to open a message from them cool

Perhaps we should restart the "pm someone you don't yet know" thread and see how many new friends can be made :angel:
Tracy-Jayne

14 Jan 2006

Hmmmmmmmm...............I suppose at least that way you would get Pm's from people who actually bother to check the Forums and might therefore have a bit of an idea what this site is really all about. biggrin

14 Jan 2006

Quote by vodka_babe22uk
runs before she gets the slap

/ gentle slap . . . Too late, didn't run fast enough wink

Want someone to kiss it better for you? :twisted:
T-J xxx

14 Jan 2006

Quote by vodka_babe22uk

runs before she gets the slap

/ gentle slap . . . Too late, didn't run fast enough wink

Want someone to kiss it better for you? :twisted:
T-J xxx
depends on who it is mate like you im fussy lmao
mmmmmmmm please let him have a sexy ass and a tache
You mean my pet goat? :eeek: :rotflmao:
He's on his way . . . . :wink:
T-J xxxx

14 Jan 2006

Quote by Lissa
Hmmmmmmmm...............I suppose at least that way you would get Pm's from people who actually bother to check the Forums and might therefore have a bit of an idea what this site is really all about.

So what is it really about then? dunno

As newcomers ourselves we are still finding it hard to work out just what this site thinks it is, and more importantly what the users of the site think it is.
Zillions of PMs! We have had only about 1 per weekâ€¦I told her it should have been my arse on the photo :grin:

14 Jan 2006

Quote by firelizard
Hmmmmmmmm...............I suppose at least that way you would get Pm's from people who actually bother to check the Forums and might therefore have a bit of an idea what this site is really all about.

So what is it really about then? dunno

As newcomers ourselves we are still finding it hard to work out just what this site thinks it is, and more importantly what the users of the site think it is.
Zillions of PMs! We have had only about 1 per weekâ€¦I told her it should have been my arse on the photo :grin:
It's about inter-action, it's about getting to know people, it's about having a laugh and a chat with like-minded people, it's about being able to discuss sexual and non-sexual things, it's about finding people you click with both sexually and non-sexually.
It's NOT about 'I've got a big cock and you're gonna have it, cos you're a woman on here so you must be easy'

14 Jan 2006

Quote by RedHot
I know we've all had a jolly good moan over the last few weeks about newbies pm'ing us. There are few who have escaped the *wanna shag* brigade, but I wanted to let everyone know that there is a positive side to some of it
We have had zillions . . . well ok, slight exaggeration there, but loads anyway . . . of pm's from newbies recently.
Some have been absolute bollox, some not even worth the time it took to read them, but in amongst them all, we have found some really nice people
Often, they are not local to us looking to meet, or looking for anything other than to say Hi, but since they are articulate, polite and chatty is is a real pleasure to open a message from them
Perhaps we should restart the "pm someone you don't yet know" thread and see how many new friends can be made :angel:
Tracy-Jayne

Wonderful idea, T-J - you are a lady and a scholar! :D
It's a curious thing though - there are a lot of people in SH, yet only a very small minority have placed ads in the last few months. And only an even smaller minority bother to contribute to the threads in the forums.
Does this mean the vast majority ain't interested in being PMed, no matter how friendly and respectful the PM might be? confused

14 Jan 2006

Quote by hotrod39
It's a curious thing though - there are a lot of people in SH, yet only a very small minority have placed ads in the last few months. And only an even smaller minority bother to contribute to the threads in the forums.
Does this mean the vast majority ain't interested in being PMed, no matter how friendly and respectful the PM might be?

Even before the change, all the people using the ads could have joined the forum if they wanted to......so I guess they didn't, and still don't, want to. It's just that they now have access to the PM facility too so it's another tool for contact.
I have to say that I've had quite a few PMs from people in the last 48 hours who clearly have looked at profiles - they still seem to think that preferences on profiles are ads but I'd say that's progress biggrin

14 Jan 2006

As a newbie, I've resisted PMing people. My feeling is that until I've spent a bit more time reading the forums and dropping in for a chat occasionally it would be rude to PM you folks. The softly softly approach, I guess. I think for me to start sending out PMs now would be intrusive - a bit like a stranger turning up on the doorstep and demanding a cuppa!
Maybe I'm wrong and the more up-front are now having a great time
biggrin

14 Jan 2006

Since the new ownership of the site and the changes that have been made, I have received almost as many PMs from newbies and people I don't know, as I've received in the last 20 months since I joined.
Without a doubt the feel of the forum has changed. It is now far less intimate and much more of a quick shag site, I'm not offering any opinion as to whether this is a good or a bad thing, but it is a fact and it's impossible to swim against the tide of change.
When I look at the people who are logged in, the vast majority are strangers to me, so I now don't spend anything like as much time here as i used to. There are times when I log in here, browse and sometimes join in, but I have a home elsewhere which I find a more comfortable place to be.
I am sure there are many people here who are entirely comfortable with it and I wish them success and hope they find what they want.I will continue to use the forum here, from time to time, as long as I am still welcome but it is not the place it used to be, for me at any rate.
smile

:)

14 Jan 2006

Quote by EagerSlut

Without a doubt the feel of the forum has changed. It is now far less intimate and much more of a quick shag site, I'm not offering any opinion as to whether this is a good or a bad thing, but it is a fact and it's impossible to swim against the tide of change.

You are undoubtedly correct about the structure and use of the site now, but I feel you have missed the point of my post.
Lets be honest, we've always had twats on here, some come and go, others have stayed (and become regular and well known forum users confused

), but with the large numbers of so called newbies joining the forum, when they formerly probably only used the ads, they are some really nice peeps amongst them just waiting to be discovered.
Now the initial flurry has calmed down a bit, perhaps we could all try to make some of these people feel more welcome if they pm us, instead of leaving the site in droves and coming back here to tell us how crap it is on here and how it's more welcoming elsewhere. rolleyes

T-J

14 Jan 2006

Quote by RedHot

Without a doubt the feel of the forum has changed. It is now far less intimate and much more of a quick shag site, I'm not offering any opinion as to whether this is a good or a bad thing, but it is a fact and it's impossible to swim against the tide of change.

You are undoubtedly correct about the structure and use of the site now, but I feel you have missed the point of my post.
Lets be honest, we've always had twats on here, some come and go, others have stayed (and become regular and well known forum users confused

), but with the large numbers of so called newbies joining the forum, when they formerly probably only used the ads, they are some really nice peeps amongst them just waiting to be discovered.
Now the initial flurry has calmed down a bit, perhaps we could all try to make some of these people feel more welcome if they pm us, instead of leaving the site in droves and coming back here to tell us how crap it is on here and how it's more welcoming elsewhere. rolleyes

T-J
I wouldn't disagree with you there hunni. I didn't want my comments to come across as knocking it here. I'm sorry if that's how it appeared to anyone. redface

ops: :oops:
We all have to find out own comfort zones wink

ES :rascal:

16 Jan 2006

As a newbie guy here I'm sorry to dive in, and give my opinion.
I have lurked in the background here for quite sometime, and I have noticed a lot of the fellas here with the 'Duhhh....can i put my knob in you' kind of posts, and frankly it is comical.
Just for the record.....we are not al that way. Some of us have more than one brain cell that doesnt explode when we remember our names (although granted theres some muppets here that obviously werent in possesion of the family brain cell when they posted)
Please dont 'tar us all with the same brush'
Perahps this site is a victim of its own success........but in my opinion if you ignore the idiots you can still talk to the people you like. This site is fantastic, with some really nice people
Just my 2 pence worth
Have fun ...4_Fox_Ache biggrin

16 Jan 2006

Quote by mihangel69
As a newbie, I've resisted PMing people. My feeling is that until I've spent a bit more time reading the forums and dropping in for a chat occasionally it would be rude to PM you folks. The softly softly approach, I guess. I think for me to start sending out PMs now would be intrusive - a bit like a stranger turning up on the doorstep and demanding a cuppa!
Maybe I'm wrong and the more up-front are now having a great time

I`m in a similar situation. I know as a mature single guy, I will have my options seriously reduced. I, for one, am currently happy just to join in with the banter on the forums, I don`t do chat as I`m just too slow, but if I can get an invite to a munch, job done.

16 Jan 2006

Good post, intelligent comments, mature debate ........ is it too early to ask one of you red hot babes for a shag ?

16 Jan 2006

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

16 Jan 2006

Interesting debate. I'm not new on the site but a relative newbie on here. I have PMed folk and got the odd reply but not many, so now I know where I've been going wrong! Thanks!
More importantly I do think it is good to get to know folk a bit before anything else but until now I've been bewildered by the range of topics on the forum and not known where to start. Oh well sad

Still I'm in here from time to time now biggrin

16 Jan 2006

Quote by Burtman
Good post, intelligent comments, mature debate ........ is it too early to ask one of you red hot babes for a shag ?

Thanks for lightening the mood, Burtman lol

Frankly, it is not too easy for newbies to find out the ropes. Yes, I do know about the 'advice' section on the left hand side of the screen. I expect I am one of the tiny minority of newbies who's actually gone out of his way to read it.. go on, give me a coconut.. cool

... and in any case, I don't believe it mentions people should not PM each other 'on spec', nor that women actually read men's ads! And, I might add, there is nothing spefically for single women and couples - IMHO, there should be!

16 Jan 2006

I think you'll find that most of the regular forum posters who've been here for some time will always reply to a polite and articulate PM, no matter who it comes from, even if it's just to say thank you but no thanks.
No-one needs to feel nervous about joining in. Just take it steady to start with; post a thread to introduce yourself and join in in the threads that interest you. You'll soon begin to become a familiar name and your character/persona will start to develop and other people will begin to bounce off your posts.
You don't need to have been here for a tremendous length of time before you can attend a Munch, provided someone established and trusted will verify you.
Hope this helps anyone who's feeling hesitant about dipping their toes in the water! :thumbup:
:rascal: bolt

16 Jan 2006

Quote by Burtman
Good post, intelligent comments, mature debate ........ is it too early to ask one of you red hot babes for a shag ?

:smackbottom: You're supposed to ask in pm! Bloody newbies . . . rolleyes

Now c'mere and give me that shag :twisted: :lol2:
T-J :wink:

17 Jan 2006

Quote by RedHot

Without a doubt the feel of the forum has changed. It is now far less intimate and much more of a quick shag site, I'm not offering any opinion as to whether this is a good or a bad thing, but it is a fact and it's impossible to swim against the tide of change.

You are undoubtedly correct about the structure and use of the site now, but I feel you have missed the point of my post.
Lets be honest, we've always had twats on here, some come and go, others have stayed (and become regular and well known forum users confused

), but with the large numbers of so called newbies joining the forum, when they formerly probably only used the ads, they are some really nice peeps amongst them just waiting to be discovered.
Now the initial flurry has calmed down a bit, perhaps we could all try to make some of these people feel more welcome if they pm us, instead of leaving the site in droves and coming back here to tell us how crap it is on here and how it's more welcoming elsewhere. rolleyes

T-J
Your right. Before the site changes, even in the short time we have been here, we've seen people join the site, join in on the forums, and become popular and respected members.
As you say the site has changed, but it doesn't mean that all the newbies joining in are just after a quick shag...... The site is beginning to settle down, so lets see what kind of community can develop.

17 Jan 2006

We've been here for a few months now, and so far everything is great. It's obvious from looking around on the forums that there are a lot of regulars, and speaking as a couple that are fairly new to the place, I can say it does feel a little intimidating at times. But perseverance is the key, and trying to be funny :P
The way Britain is today, with 390,630 accounts on this site, there are bound to be a few lemons, and also a couple of gems! ;)

17 Jan 2006

hi i am a fairly new on i have posted a few threads but have had no joy with pms i fear if i pm anybody i will get a sense of rejection but i suppose if i presevere things will come right in the end

17 Jan 2006

Quote by man50
hi i am a fairly new on i have posted a few threads but have had no joy with pms i fear if i pm anybody i will get a sense of rejection but i suppose if i presevere things will come right in the end

Not a dig at man50, but something just blinged in my head when I read the whole thread, particularly T-J's posts, then the above post.
An idea might be to look on the PM system as another means of communication rather than one of "contact - hopefully leading to more"
In my time here, I've sent loads of 'blind' PMs. None of them being one line "Wanna-shag?" type.
Some have gone on and "lead to other things" - some have developed into rl friendships.
One of the "De-lurk" PMs even lead, in a roundabout way; to me giving up my "swingle" status :shock: (I bet no-one knew that! ! )
I've always understood the "rule" to be - PM away, but be polite and respectful in both content and context.
Now - here's a dangerous thing.
Forgive me if this turns sour - but . . . . . .
This is the link to the original "PM a stranger thread"
Have a read at your leisure.
Remember tho' . . . . . . . .
POLITE AND RESPECTFUL
btw, T-J; Nice thread, Nice thought :thumbup:

17 Jan 2006

Quote by RedHot
Good post, intelligent comments, mature debate ........ is it too early to ask one of you red hot babes for a shag ?

:smackbottom: You're supposed to ask in pm! Bloody newbies . . . rolleyes

Now c'mere and give me that shag :twisted: :lol2:
T-J :wink:
Yippee I've pulled !!! And who said one-liners never got you anywhere ....