A timely reminder

8 Aug 2006

It's not had much airing of late and with a fair few new faces trickeling in to the forum I thought I might just broach the subject of one line pm's :scared: or ones of the derogatory nature. I'm all for compliments and use them regually when due. But logging on to find such things as cor she ain't half bad or I bet she loves it this way and that way never really have been the done thing. Everyone I know well welcomes PM's of a friendly nature but seriously some of the shite landing in my PM box of late I wouldn't dream of saying.
Prehaps its me being naive but I've always been a beleaver of if you wouldn't walk up to someone in public and say it don't say it on here wink

8 Aug 2006

Sorry Sheddy i will try to refrain from doing it again :giggle:
hehe We understand what you meen though there a pain lol

Shaz x

8 Aug 2006

I've not sent pm's of this nature as you say it's a common problem we hear a lot about.
One thing that wondered is it the fact it's just one line or whats in that line.
ie
Is a one line type message that is well mannered as less well recieved as one with filth, puns, innuendo etc.
It's just something i'v thought about should i need to contact someone as i have a full profile. Or should i lessen the profile and use it for PM's
Also what is considered a good length for a 1st pm.

8 Aug 2006

Quote by goose35
Also what is considered a good length for a 1st pm.

It's not about length goose I can send short one line PM's to most people on here and do, what is meant as a one line PM is the type that go "fancy a shag" or "fook me your hot when can we meet" or the ones thatr are simply a cut and paste sent to loads of users confused

8 Aug 2006

Quote by sheddy

Also what is considered a good length for a 1st pm.

It's not about length goose I can send short one line PM's to most people on here and do, what is meant as a one line PM is the type that go "fancy a shag" or "fook me your hot when can we meet" or the ones thatr are simply a cut and paste sent to loads of users confused

That what i thought but just thought id ask. TY

8 Aug 2006

one more timely reminder :shock:
If you are new or newish and arn't sure what is the done thing
click here
or even the links in the advice section in the sticky at the top of the cafe (i did but em in here but fooked up my formating redface

:thumbup:

8 Aug 2006

I now know what I am doing wrong :doh: lol

Seriously I wouldn't dream of doing that and cannot understand why people would think that is acceptable and something somebody would want to read rolleyes

8 Aug 2006

Quote by AndyNudeUK
Seriously I wouldn't dream of doing that and cannot understand why people would think that is acceptable and something somebody would want to read

You have been well educated then lol

Shaz x

8 Aug 2006

Quote by Shaz_n_Tony
Seriously I wouldn't dream of doing that and cannot understand why people would think that is acceptable and something somebody would want to read

You have been well educated then lol

Shaz xI just think it's being nice to someone and speaking to them how you would like to be spoken to smile

Maybe these one-liners like to be spoken that way too dunno

8 Aug 2006

Quote by AndyNudeUK
Seriously I wouldn't dream of doing that and cannot understand why people would think that is acceptable and something somebody would want to read

You have been well educated then lol

Shaz xI just think it's being nice to someone and speaking to them how you would like to be spoken to smile

Smack on, Wish all people would have that kind of commonsense biggrin

Shaz x

8 Aug 2006

Well said Sheddy!
I was just wondering though if this is since you and PK have had a joint account?

8 Aug 2006

Quote by Kiss_Me
Well said Sheddy!
I was just wondering though if this is since you and PK have had a joint account?

yes KM.......although Sheddy's not here at the moment I think that is the case......but having a joint account has opened his eyes even futher which is why he felt the need to bring the subject up again......
for him to open his own PM's and find crude oneliners aimed at me has shocked him as he previously wasn't aware of the extent to which it happens........as I'm used to them I genrally just laugh at the plonkers and delete them but he understandably takes offence to such remarks being aimed at me.....
one of the best ones we had recently was a guy oneline Pming me.....and then half an hour later when he'd obviously done a bit of research PMing him to say......opps sorry....didn't realise that was your misses.....
but the hope is that some of these people ( and i say people as its not just single guys.......couples and fems have been known to do it too) will read this and then engage their brains before sending out PM's...............wishful thinking i know but we can try..... lol

8 Aug 2006

Quote by sheddy
Prehaps its me being naive but I've always been a beleaver of if you wouldn't walk up to someone in public and say it don't say it on here

Are you sure sheddy??? surprised

Really really sure??
Bet your wrong...... biggrin

Mike

8 Aug 2006

Quote by poshkate
Well said Sheddy!
I was just wondering though if this is since you and PK have had a joint account?

yes KM.......although Sheddy's not here at the moment I think that is the case......but having a joint account has opened his eyes even futher which is why he felt the need to bring the subject up again......
for him to open his own PM's and find crude oneliners aimed at me has shocked him as he previously wasn't aware of the extent to which it happens........as I'm used to them I genrally just laugh at the plonkers and delete them but he understandably takes offence to such remarks being aimed at me.....
one of the best ones we had recently was a guy oneline Pming me.....and then half an hour later when he'd obviously done a bit of research PMing him to say......opps sorry....didn't realise that was your misses.....
but the hope is that some of these people ( and i say people as its not just single guys.......couples and fems have been known to do it too) will read this and then engage their brains before sending out PM's...............wishful thinking i know but we can try..... lol

I don't know if anything can be done about these messages that get sent or if they do already but it isn't going to encourage females to be members here and enjoy the swinging scene if these are the types of messages that they are going to receive mad

People need to be encouraged not put off!
Sorry to hear you are having these messages Kate and anybody else for that matter. I really hope something can be/is being done about it smile

8 Aug 2006

Quote by AndyNudeUK
Sorry to hear you are having these messages Kate and anybody else for that matter. I really hope something can be/is being done about it

no need to be sorry andy.......like i said......i find them quite amusing.......and its great therapy replying to them........ :twisted:

8 Aug 2006

Quote by poshkate
Well said Sheddy!
I was just wondering though if this is since you and PK have had a joint account?

yes KM.......although Sheddy's not here at the moment I think that is the case......but having a joint account has opened his eyes even futher which is why he felt the need to bring the subject up again......
for him to open his own PM's and find crude oneliners aimed at me has shocked him as he previously wasn't aware of the extent to which it happens........as I'm used to them I genrally just laugh at the plonkers and delete them but he understandably takes offence to such remarks being aimed at me.....
one of the best ones we had recently was a guy oneline Pming me.....and then half an hour later when he'd obviously done a bit of research PMing him to say......opps sorry....didn't realise that was your misses.....
but the hope is that some of these people ( and i say people as its not just single guys.......couples and fems have been known to do it too) will read this and then engage their brains before sending out PM's...............wishful thinking i know but we can try..... lol

Spot on PK! :thumbup:
I had a sneaking suspicion that it would have started when you two got a couples account. It's like you say though, if it's directed at you you can get used to it and deal with it, but when it's directed at somebody you love it has to be extremely annoying and hurtful.
Hopefully this thread will do some good!
biggrin

8 Aug 2006

Quote by poshkate

Sorry to hear you are having these messages Kate and anybody else for that matter. I really hope something can be/is being done about it

no need to be sorry andy.......like i said......i find them quite amusing.......and its great therapy replying to them........ :twisted:It's lucky that you are able to laugh at them and hopefully that will continue to be the case smile

, but I am sure it would put some people right off bolt

8 Aug 2006

Quote by Kiss_Me
Spot on PK! :thumbup:
I had a sneaking suspicion that it would have started when you two got a couples account. It's like you say though, if it's directed at you you can get used to it and deal with it, but when it's directed at somebody you love it has to be extremely annoying and hurtful.
Hopefully this thread will do some good!

Obviously it started when we got a couples account as before no one wanted to send one liners to my neked torso lol

But the main reason I posted was because the people they were coming of late from were new so I thought a little constructive help may go a long way. As Kate said all we do is laugh at them, but a little reminder on site etiquette can be no bad thing cool

8 Aug 2006

Quote by goose35
Also what is considered a good length for a 1st pm.

About 9" :giggle:
sorry I was just reading the measuring your penis thread rotflmao

I'll go now shall I? bolt

8 Aug 2006

Quote by sheddy

Spot on PK! :thumbup:
I had a sneaking suspicion that it would have started when you two got a couples account. It's like you say though, if it's directed at you you can get used to it and deal with it, but when it's directed at somebody you love it has to be extremely annoying and hurtful.
Hopefully this thread will do some good!

Obviously it started when we got a couples account as before no one wanted to send one liners to my neked torso lol

But the main reason I posted was because the people they were coming of late from were new so I thought a little constructive help may go a long way. As Kate said all we do is laugh at them, but a little reminder on site etiquette can be no bad thing cool

A good thread that will hopefully help others, and glad to hear that you can both laugh at it!
I have changed my profile to say "I don't want/seek anything" but I still get winks and one-liners, but at a lot less that I used to!
:thumbup:

8 Aug 2006

can i just borrow this bit Soft wrote in the chatrooms broke thread????

Quote by softouch1
Hi,
I imagine this subject has been covered before, but it seems that it needs reiterating. I am a relatively new chatroom user, so maybe i'm just not used to it, but i never cease to be amazed by the level of stupidity and rudeness shown by some of the chatroom users. Why do guys who would never dream of going up to a girl in their local pub or club and saying "get your tits out !" think that approach will work just because the women on this or any other site are open about their love of sex ?
I've been a member of this site for about 3 years, and it is only since i started using the chatroom that i have actually met anyone from here. I think that is because the chatroom and webcam facility provide an environment where my personality is on display in a way that a static ad and photos cannot. So those guys who come in and whisper without asking first, or the first thing they say in the room is a demand to see some body parts or some "action", what does that say about you ? Would you want a guy like that to meet your wife or girlfriend ? The women in the chatroom are not tarts or sluts despite the racy names some of them choose to adopt, speak to them as you would a woman in a normal social situation, you'll get a better response !
On a seperate but related topic, why do some white guys find it so difficult to accept that there are some women out there who prefer the company of black guys ? I am usually to be found in the "white fems for black guys" room, and the name is pretty self explanatory, but some guys insist on coming in and abusing the users because they are not what the women are looking for. The term "racist" has been levelled at us many times.
We are not racist, in our "normal" lives we all probably interact with people of all nationalities, and treat them all equally, But the chatroom is our private life, and there we are free to express our sexual are welcome to come in and contribute to the chat, but don't condemn us. Would you as a slim girl go into a BBW room and complain you were being excluded ? I don't think so, you would look elsewhere. If you are a white guy and can't handle the fact that the women in the white for black room might not find you sexually attractive..............don't go in !
Peace and love to all (even the small minded),
softouch.

maybe it`s all the same peeps who jump into your pm box ,who r running round the chatrooms???
biggrin

8 Aug 2006

Quote by twos_company
maybe it`s all the same peeps who jump into your pm box ,who r running round the chatrooms???

exactly.......
problem is though, to a degree, its wasted effort bringing it up in here.... as most of them never venture in here... probably cos theres no live titty action.

8 Aug 2006

Quote by DeeCee
exactly.......
problem is though, to a degree, its wasted effort bringing it up in here.... as most of them never venture in here... probably cos theres no live titty action.

I have to disagree Dee Cee have you seen our in boxes how do you know they didn't come from forum users wink

8 Aug 2006

Quote by DeeCee
probably cos theres no live titty action.

8 Aug 2006

Quote by sheddy

exactly.......
problem is though, to a degree, its wasted effort bringing it up in here.... as most of them never venture in here... probably cos theres no live titty action.

I have to disagree Dee Cee have you seen our in boxes how do you know they didn't come from forum users wink

i stand corrected then.... surprised and corrected...

8 Aug 2006

Quote by DeeCee

exactly.......
problem is though, to a degree, its wasted effort bringing it up in here.... as most of them never venture in here... probably cos theres no live titty action.

I have to disagree Dee Cee have you seen our in boxes how do you know they didn't come from forum users wink

i stand corrected then.... surprised and corrected...
I saw a lot of unknown to the forum users in the forum during my few night chat stints over the weekend that i dont see during the day.

8 Aug 2006

Quote by goose35
I saw a lot of unknown to the forum users in the forum during my few night chat stints over the weekend that i dont see during the day.

Erm, Goose, say that again please lol

8 Aug 2006

Right before it turns into a fookin witch hunt rolleyes

I posted this to advise I'm sure it will do excactly that so as far as we are concerned if it helps others to find out how to get along on the site we are happy. Yes these kinda PM's shock/piss me off but I'm big enough and mature enough to laugh it off. cool

8 Aug 2006

Quote by DeeCee

maybe it`s all the same peeps who jump into your pm box ,who r running round the chatrooms???

exactly.......
problem is though, to a degree, its wasted effort bringing it up in here.... as most of them never venture in here... probably cos theres no live titty action.
welll........
just quoted it in the chatroom too............. :twisted:

8 Aug 2006

Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple

I saw a lot of unknown to the forum users in the forum during my few night chat stints over the weekend that i dont see during the day.

Erm, Goose, say that again please lol

Right i saw many users in the forum during some of my over night stints in the chat rooms at the weekend that dont use the forum. Some may be reading some are just profile hunting. When in chat i often have a quick look in the forum for new posts and noticed this.
I'm was trying to say that sheddys point on why posting in the forum about this is good whether his or anyone elses PM's come from forum users or not.
It read better in preview lol

Are you sure?