I don't know how to behave!!! I have a second date tomorrow night with someone from a 'straight' dating site and he's really nice and I no longer know what to do. I can't say 'Let's go back to mine' etc etc. I can't tell him whatever he wants to do in the bedroom is fine by me. I have to be proper.
Do I?
How long do I have to be 'proper'?
When do I tell him about SH?
Can I ever go back to the vanilla world?
Jezzay.
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A vanilla date
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Orgasminator
Wouldn't it be a bummer if HE was thinking the same & neither of you confessed!!!
:? :? :? Orgasminator
OOooo Maia, our posts came simultaneously!!!
Quote by Maia
HI Jezzay
what do you mean by having to be proper?
Do you think he would think you are disreputable if you intonate that you will consider sex on a second date? Do you reckon you might overwhelme him with your kinkiness? :P
Yes - that's exactly what I think.
Confession time. At an overnight work conference the other week I was 'seduced' by a young man who having won the day couldn't handle the result. He asked if he could (details on application) and when I said 'Yes' he said 'You make it sound like it is standard'. It wasn't a complement. It's different out there.
Jezzay.
Quote by jezzay
Confession time. At an overnight work conference the other week I was 'seduced' by a young man who having won the day couldn't handle the result. He asked if he could (details on application) and when I said 'Yes' he said 'You make it sound like it is standard'. It wasn't a complement. It's different out there.
Jezzay.
oooo go on then, details please.....
Orgasminator
Quote by Maia
hmmmmm...... given the chance there are many many things we could achieve simultaneously....
Mmmm I'd love to but it's all I can do to just spell simultaneously!!!
Quote by Maia
Confession time. At an overnight work conference the other week I was 'seduced' by a young man who having won the day couldn't handle the result. He asked if he could (details on application) and when I said 'Yes' he said 'You make it sound like it is standard'. It wasn't a complement. It's different out there.
Jezzay.
oooo go on then, details please.....
Oh OK then - wank all over my tits. No big deal I thought. Was to him!!!
And the thing which entertains me most is - two days later we found ourselves having to work together. It was clear he found it a big problem - I found it HUGELY enjoyable!!! His issues, I suspect are because he has a partner - I think. And now he is panicking big time about my discretion.
So anyway - now I don't want to get in the same muddle again because this new guy is nice.
Jezzay.
I can see your dilemma, Jezzay. Don't want to scare him with your sexual prowess 
Personally I would play coy and subtly lead him, make him think he is in control all the time.. a few verbal encouragements here and there and some helping hand on your part will surely get his imagination going overdrive.
other than that, the "i've always wanted to try this...." trick might do it..
Personally I would play coy and subtly lead him, make him think he is in control all the time.. a few verbal encouragements here and there and some helping hand on your part will surely get his imagination going overdrive. other than that, the "i've always wanted to try this...." trick might do it..
Orgasminator
Quote by jezzay
I don't know how to behave!!! I have a second date tomorrow night with someone from a 'straight' dating site and he's really nice and I no longer know what to do. I can't say 'Let's go back to mine' etc etc. I can't tell him whatever he wants to do in the bedroom is fine by me. I have to be proper.
Do I?
How long do I have to be 'proper'?
When do I tell him about SH?
Can I ever go back to the vanilla world?
Jezzay.
Why not just enjoy your date and let him make the pace?
It's only the 2nd date so wait 'til you know him better to help you decide when to tell him about your SH secrets.
There's no rush is there?
Orgasminator
Scary...together again Maia but this time I came 2nd. :bounce:
...I can empathise with your dilemma Jezzay, I'd had a wild old decadent time during my singleton days and never held bck from being open about my sexual predilictions (nothing heavy I hasten to add!!), then when I met the girl who I really fell for..I clammed up like a naughty school boy, probably due to a fear of not wanting to offend or upset her..months later after our relationship had deepened, we were chatting about this and she confessed that she had considered ending the relationship because she thought I was intimidated by her and 'up tight' sexually..so I guess my advice is be true to yourself..what ever you get off on should be shared and open for discussion..maintaining an act is just too exhausting and may not have the desired outcome in any event!!
Good luck hun
:) :) :)
Good luck hun
:) :) :) 
Orgasminator
Quote by jezzay
Confession time. At an overnight work conference the other week I was 'seduced' by a young man who having won the day couldn't handle the result. He asked if he could (details on application) and when I said 'Yes' he said 'You make it sound like it is standard'. It wasn't a complement. It's different out there.
Jezzay.
oooo go on then, details please.....
Oh OK then - wank all over my tits. No big deal I thought. Was to him!!!
And the thing which entertains me most is - two days later we found ourselves having to work together. It was clear he found it a big problem - I found it HUGELY enjoyable!!! His issues, I suspect are because he has a partner - I think. And now he is panicking big time about my discretion.
So anyway - now I don't want to get in the same muddle again because this new guy is nice.
Jezzay.
Typical male reaction! *scorn*
They want the pie whole and they want to eat it too. Same situation with wanting a good girl for a wife and a nasty slut to shag on the side. It is never about what we want or need or desire
I am beginning to think that men have more issues about sex than we do! Anyway, back to your dilemma... if you really like him, let him know and take the consequences, whatever these may be. I am glad I had revealed how much I liked my Scot man and lost out - it would have been emotionally unbearable to me to have had sex and then lose out.
Quote by Maia
well,,, it is tomorrow night... what happened?
Ah well, we had a pleasant supper and more good conversation. He was friendly but not flirtatious. We left as it had got noisy and couldn't decide where to go next. Biting my tongue to stop it saying 'Back to my place then?' I said instead 'What do you want to do?' He answered 'Honestly? Go somewhere quiet, kiss you and touch you. But you might feel that's too much to do with just lust.'
And so did Jezzay say :
a) I think that's a bit forward for a second date, or
b) You men - just treat us as sex objects, or
c) (without a second's hesitation) Lust is fine by me!
I think you guessed right. And we had a lovely time. He didn't stay over, however, because he 'wouldn't sleep properly' and so this morning I did feel a little peeved - 'Ah it WAS just sex' - I was hoping for the cuddles and the cup of tea in the morning. But I needn't have worried. He was back on my doorstep by lunchtime to make up for lost cuddles.
So the moral is : follow the advice you're given on SH - it works.
And so is this a SH departure? Not yet. More likely a twist on that recurring thread topic : 'How can I make my BOYfriend interested in Swinging?'!
Thanks,
Jezzay
Sex God
Take him along to a Munch.
John
John
Orgasminator
Quote by jezzay
And we had a lovely time. He didn't stay over, however, because he 'wouldn't sleep properly' and so this morning I did feel a little peeved - 'Ah it WAS just sex' - I was hoping for the cuddles and the cup of tea in the morning. But I needn't have worried. He was back on my doorstep by lunchtime to make up for lost cuddles.
Aaahhhh!!! I just love a happy ending. :thrilled: :happy: :inlove:
Orgasminator
Quote by Maia
awww Jezzay
that sounds lovely!! Enjoy each other .... then see if he would like to share
Strewth! Jezzay has only just helped him back into his pants and Maia is touting for a bit of the action already!!!
Is there no stopping her?!!!
Keep him and enjoy him all to yourself Jezzay.......
....urrmmm unless you'd like a little mmf of course.
Quote by jezzay
HI Jezzay
what do you mean by having to be proper?
Do you think he would think you are disreputable if you intonate that you will consider sex on a second date? Do you reckon you might overwhelme him with your kinkiness? :P
Yes - that's exactly what I think.
Confession time. At an overnight work conference the other week I was 'seduced' by a young man who having won the day couldn't handle the result. He asked if he could (details on application) and when I said 'Yes' he said 'You make it sound like it is standard'. It wasn't a complement. It's different out there.
Jezzay.
YOu are right...I love to be simultaneaous with you.
Quote by Maia
Strewth! Jezzay has only just helped him back into his pants and Maia is touting for a bit of the action already!!!
Is there no stopping her?!!!
Keep him and enjoy him all to yourself Jezzay.......
:
no littlemee
i've only got plans for you......
I like this as well ... but with a stick!
Orgasminator
Quote by Maia
ok
you're confusing me now....
Don't worry Maia, she's Italian.
Orgasminator
Quote by Maia
no littlemee
i've only got plans for you......
So you gonna let me know what these plans are or you gonna surprise me? :wink:
