Abusive Members

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Tv_Susie_Kent
When you state in a post you are looking for something, why do people add you to their msn and when you politely remind them that you are looking for what you posted about, eg a female and THEY are male, they launch into you with verbal abuse and continue to pester you. Thats twice in two days. Plus someone out of the blue sending an abusive pm for no reason.
Why do people do that, i guess its the same for couples seeking a bi females and getting guys pester them then abuse them when you remind them you dont want a guy you want a female.
Cant people read? and why the abuse?

Hi Susie.....
Sorry to hear that you've had trouble...... keep the abusive pm and send it to one of the mods... they will deal with it for you hunni....
Some people dont read exactly what others are looking for, or hope to change their minds...for whatever reasons.....
Keep smiling Susie.
equi-princess xxx

11 Sep 2005

Can't explain the abuse Susie, but if I was you, I'd report abusive pms (abuse@swingingheaven.co.uk).
As for people adding you to their MSN, if you remove your email address from your ad, they can't do that without yougivingthem the email.

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Tv_Susie_Kent
When you state in a post you are looking for something, why do people add you to their msn and when you politely remind them that you are looking for what you posted about, eg a female and THEY are male, they launch into you with verbal abuse and continue to pester you. Thats twice in two days. Plus someone out of the blue sending an abusive pm for no reason.
Why do people do that, i guess its the same for couples seeking a bi females and getting guys pester them then abuse them when you remind them you dont want a guy you want a female.
Cant people read? and why the abuse?

It isn't that they can't read, it is just they don't understand that it applies to them AS WELL .
If you are getting abusive PM's then report it in the proper place, and let the Mods either ban them or take what action is neccessary.

11 Sep 2005

We had to renove are msn from are add, but kept it on here now it doesnt seem to bad. some people just cant understand the word NO. hope you get it sorted out :taz:

11 Sep 2005

I know what you mean, i have had it a few times when i have stated i am looking for something and people email you offering the opposite to what you have asked for, usually str8 men when i have placed a add for a bi one, and when you say 'no' you don't want to meet them i usually get comments like...well your a ugly bitch anyway i don't need to coem on here for a shag i can get it anywhere .......guess its the male ego

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Tv_Susie_Kent
The abuse i suppose i can handle,

Sorry if this sounds a little harsh, but why the hell should you handle the abuse? What gives them the right to abuse you or anyone else for that matter? I really do think you should take the advice of Frecklebird and the others and report it to the Mods (email address was posted somewhere above).
Dont let these idiots think they can get away with sending you, or anyone else, abusive emails!
Good luck.

11 Sep 2005

Absolutely, NWC - the next person might think it's typical of the site and be put off completely.

11 Sep 2005

full agreance with the other posts susie...not sure really...obviously single males dont really have this problem much..well at least i dont ...
maybe as mentioned people are expecting to meet up and go straight to the punch line ...
well as long as you dont let these miscreant neofaschist dweebies get to you...
happy adding for the future
dargento

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
The abuse i suppose i can handle,

Sorry if this sounds a little harsh, but why the hell should you handle the abuse? What gives them the right to abuse you or anyone else for that matter? I really do think you should take the advice of Frecklebird and the others and report it to the Mods (email address was posted somewhere above).
Dont let these idiots think they can get away with sending you, or anyone else, abusive emails!
Good luck.
Couldn't agree more. Nobody new or a regular should have to suffer abuse. Report it - don't put up with it.

11 Sep 2005

Im an abrasive member , does that count ? :shock:

11 Sep 2005

Quote by Silk and Big G
Im an abrasive member , does that count ? :shock:

I've already reported you :2fingers:

11 Sep 2005

Cheers

11 Sep 2005

All i can say is my iggy list has grownnnnnnnnn lol

And yeah i have had the "well your ugly" line anyway :lol:

12 Sep 2005

Sorry to hear about the trouble you have had Susie sad

I to had remove my msn and e maill adresse from here as i constantly had guys adding me asuming as a lot of people who dont know any better do that just cause your are on swinging site that you shag anyone mad

But im sure as you allready that there are lots of nice genuine peole on here biggrin

Carol

12 Sep 2005

we appear to have a very optomistic male community. I hear it all the time males thinking their a couple
WHY

13 Sep 2005

when we first joined s/h we were chatting to a guy who asked for a pic ,we obliged , then he replied sorry you,re too big :shock: i,m glad i did,nt let this idiot put me off as we,ve had lots of fun since lol

, but at the end of the day you can be more diplomatic ie ; sorry you,re not what i,m looking for etc ! But i must admit i did feel a bit insecure for a few days redface

13 Sep 2005

Quote by sexyann57
when we first joined s/h we were chatting to a guy who asked for a pic ,we obliged , then he replied sorry you,re too big :shock: i,m glad i did,nt let this idiot put me off as we,ve had lots of fun since , but at the end of the day you can be more diplomatic ie ; sorry you,re not what i,m looking for etc ! But i must admit i did feel a bit insecure for a few days

Personally , in those circumstances I would rather here "sorry your too big " than any other mumbo jumbo that says nothing. Not everyone is into bigger women , that is a fact of life and there choice. I hate the ambiguity of "not what I'm looking for"

13 Sep 2005

Quote by treasurechest
when we first joined s/h we were chatting to a guy who asked for a pic ,we obliged , then he replied sorry you,re too big :shock: i,m glad i did,nt let this idiot put me off as we,ve had lots of fun since , but at the end of the day you can be more diplomatic ie ; sorry you,re not what i,m looking for etc ! But i must admit i did feel a bit insecure for a few days

Personally , in those circumstances I would rather here "sorry your too big " than any other mumbo jumbo that says nothing. Not everyone is into bigger women , that is a fact of life and there choice. I hate the ambiguity of "not what I'm looking for"
Yes but he meant FAT which i took as a personal insult and when you,re new to a thing it,s a bit overwelming especially when you,ve not a lot of confidence anyway confused

ops:

13 Sep 2005

Quote by sexyann57
when we first joined s/h we were chatting to a guy who asked for a pic ,we obliged , then he replied sorry you,re too big :shock: i,m glad i did,nt let this idiot put me off as we,ve had lots of fun since , but at the end of the day you can be more diplomatic ie ; sorry you,re not what i,m looking for etc ! But i must admit i did feel a bit insecure for a few days

Personally , in those circumstances I would rather here "sorry your too big " than any other mumbo jumbo that says nothing. Not everyone is into bigger women , that is a fact of life and there choice. I hate the ambiguity of "not what I'm looking for"
Yes but he meant FAT which i took as a personal insult and when you,re new to a thing it,s a bit overwelming especially when you,ve not a lot of confidence anyway confused

ops:
Why care what he meant? What is fat to him might not be fat to others. But i know what you mean by being overwellming when your new

13 Sep 2005

Quote by sexyann57
when we first joined s/h we were chatting to a guy who asked for a pic ,we obliged , then he replied sorry you,re too big :shock: i,m glad i did,nt let this idiot put me off as we,ve had lots of fun since , but at the end of the day you can be more diplomatic ie ; sorry you,re not what i,m looking for etc ! But i must admit i did feel a bit insecure for a few days

Personally , in those circumstances I would rather here "sorry your too big " than any other mumbo jumbo that says nothing. Not everyone is into bigger women , that is a fact of life and there choice. I hate the ambiguity of "not what I'm looking for"
Yes but he meant FAT which i took as a personal insult and when you,re new to a thing it,s a bit overwelming especially when you,ve not a lot of confidence anyway confused

ops:
If you are happy in your own skin, then fuck what anyone else thinks. They've probably got problems of their own and being insulting is the only way they know how to handle it - and they generally don't do that very well either.

13 Sep 2005

Quote by treasurechest
when we first joined s/h we were chatting to a guy who asked for a pic ,we obliged , then he replied sorry you,re too big :shock: i,m glad i did,nt let this idiot put me off as we,ve had lots of fun since , but at the end of the day you can be more diplomatic ie ; sorry you,re not what i,m looking for etc ! But i must admit i did feel a bit insecure for a few days

Personally , in those circumstances I would rather here "sorry your too big " than any other mumbo jumbo that says nothing. Not everyone is into bigger women , that is a fact of life and there choice. I hate the ambiguity of "not what I'm looking for"
I agree - I actually quite respect someone if they're straight up enough to say 'Sorry, you're too big' if that's how they feel! - but that's just me!
Others are more comfortable with a 'you're not my type' ' you're not what I'm looking for' - and that's fine too. The key is saying it in a tactful manner - once , without elaborating and making it insulting - and move on.
Personal preferences again! rolleyes

13 Sep 2005

It would apear that the biggest problem is with single guys, funny but where have I heard that before!
It would appear that certain of my type cannot handle rejection and this manifests itself in a number of ways one of which is insults and abuse. Either that of they think that because you have advertised on here you have given up your right to choose who you meet for fun! Either way it is there problem and not yours.
In fact take it as proof that your a good judge as what would they be like if you met them.
Maybe we should have a qualifying exam for swinging single males. Question 1 is there a difference between swinging and getting a quick freebie shag, - discuss!

13 Sep 2005

Well, for once I have a brighter side to report.
Over the last couple of days we have had two single males add themselves to our messenger. Now I know that some people consider this rude, and prefer an e-mail request before adding, but hey, we donâ€™t mind, weâ€™re not that proud, anyway we enjoy the whole chat thing.
Sorry I digress (again) anyway, one of these guys starts chatting to me, so I asked him if he had read our profile, no came the reply, but will do so now â€¦â€¦â€¦â€¦â€¦â€¦ when he came back he said â€œsorry mate, but Iâ€™m too young and impetuous for the whole long term thing, and besides I think the age gap is a bit wide for us to become friends.
His candidness and honesty really impressed me and we ended up chatting for a couple of hours, he then went on his merry way, Caron and I had a good giggle and no-one was upset or offended. And if your reading this, you have represented your peers well young man, keep it up.
The second single guy to do this, had read our profile, and again because he was not really into the whole friendship thing, was not looking to take things further, but just came on to tell us that he liked the add, again we had quite a long chat with him, and again everyone parted on good terms.
Oh if only everyone could behave in such a way, it would make this lifestyle so much more fun.
Right, Iâ€™m off to feed the chickens :shock:

13 Sep 2005

Hi Guys,
This post has actually made me feel really sad sad

I'm stunned to think that people are that mean. I accept that I'm a single str8 bloke, and there are hundreds of us. I accept that there are a tiny number of ads that I can reply to, and I don't try to alter peoples minds - why would they?!
The thing that irritates me more is that these people actually give the rest of us a bad name!
Incidently, take some comfort that you're not totally alone - only last week I was PM'd by a single fem taking the mick out of my looks!
I don't know many of you on a personal basis, but I HAVE had the pleasure of talking in the forums with lots - every single one of you has been amazing.
Guess we'll just stick together and keep the shallow people out eh?

15 Sep 2005

We've met loads of really genuine people from this site .. One day we got an email from a couple asking us to meet up, at that particular time Ken was really busy doing Disco's at weekends, therefore I suggested if they didn't mind waiting waiting a few weeks it wouldn't be a problem meeting up..
The guy added us to messenger and we got discussing arrangements, He then asked if I could possibly meet up with them on my own and if I liked them ? I could pass my thoughts onto hubby :shock:
I told him we don't work like that, if were meeting a cpl we go together, he then started to get abusive, because I wouldn't meet them on my own.. said I was a time waster, and an abuser, probably not even me or us in the pic, prob an old pic, he also said we were looking for more notches on our bedpost the list goes on. the conversation that followed left me extremely upset.
Ken was livid about the conversation, he had been Dj -ing that night but on returning home I showed him a copy of it.. thankfully we haven't seen them on the site since , but I must admit that it did rattle me a bit rolleyes

Lucy xxx

15 Sep 2005

Quote by naughtynymphos1
I know what you mean, i have had it a few times when i have stated i am looking for something and people email you offering the opposite to what you have asked for, usually str8 men when i have placed a add for a bi one, and when you say 'no' you don't want to meet them i usually get comments like...well your a ugly bitch anyway i don't need to coem on here for a shag i can get it anywhere .......guess its the male ego

Just my luck to have missed the looking for a bi one add sad

will keep looking though wink