Help...I got a pm from a bloke who sounded quite nice. I thought he could be a possibility for a dogging meet with my hubby.. I looked at his postings through the forum, and you know that feeling when something isn't quite right? well, I realised that it was my hubby.
He was obviously trying to catch me out.
So, this morning, I re-registered under a different name, and sent him a pm, telling him I'd love to meet, discreetly etc, thinking that will shock him.
He comes home from work, looking ill, has a bath and then say's who's " ?" I deny all because I'm still playing my game with him. He's persistent. I'm persistent.
Eventually I owned up, saying I was playing along with his little game, but it's too late.
He wants a divorce. This is the icing on the cake. He's driven off with an overnight bag.
What the hell do I do now?
Our daughter is crying. I'm mad as hell.
Sensible suggestions appreciated.
Firstly dont panic.,,
When the time is right tell him you need to talk about this whole matter. Arrange somewhere quiet, no kids, and with time and try to talk about what has happened and why.
This can be very difficult for a couple without matters getting out of hand. If you find that the emotions dont allow you to talk this through then I would recommend a counsel;ling service. Try either Relate or Marriagecare (both in yellow pages) They can really help you resolve this (I know I was a relationship counsellor for 10 years)
Hope it works out for the best
I really feel for you :cry:
First of all - you definitely need to work out one thing - was he trying to catch you out (in which case he probably wouldn't have been shocked so suddenly), felt caught out himself (which may explain it a bit), or it might be that you were in the same boat. You could've both not realized each other were on here, and were both looking for something to spice up the realtionship.
I know it's probably impossible to find something positive in this, but don't you find it a strange coincidence that the one person you were drawn to out of all these people was your husband? That could say something....
Most of all, make sure you talk about it, it's best not to leave things unsaid. When my parents broke up a while ago I realized very quickly that anything left unsaid ALWAYS comes back to haunt. Be honest with each other, and you've got a good chance of sorting things out.
Good luck,
T
Hi , I do hope you guys can start really talking today and work this out . Be positive, put the effort in to discover how you got here , do the right things about it and you will come out of this together and stronger . Using a professional at Relate or similar would make a lot of sense they can hold the ring in a situation where it easy to generate more heat than light .
Good luck , and your friends are always here for you
I've not got much to add to the above, but I hope you manage to work this out somehow.
I'm sure you'll have plenty of shoulders to cry on from the SH crowd if you need them, but you should think long and hard about wther we are the right people to be turning to at this point. I know I'm out of my depth here!
sorry to hear what has happened.....
someone above me said something that i agree with.....the person that you liked enough to reply to was your husband, which says a lot... i am still confused as to why he would have flown off like that though, i take it you have gone dogging with hubby in the past and this would have been no different.....
i still think trying to trick you is a bit low though, why would he have an ad and go to all that trouble instead of just talking to you....
once you have both calm down try talking rationally, relate are brilliant for this type of thing....
i hope things all go well for you, if you ever need to talk you have so many SH people here who listen, it would be like hundreds of shoulders to lean on.....
sean xxxxxx
Me too am confused why he just left...
But I truly hope it works out well in the end. Give it some time and don't panick.
