Ageism.....whatever you say about it, it can't ever be new.. I've been around for a number of years, stop laughin' cubes, and I've generally, well since I've nearly grown up anyway, been honest about my age. I know that employers, I generalise again, discard job applications from people over a certain age, and that's unfortunate. The thing is, I've realised from my online life that many of the sites being used for people to meet, socially or sexually, employ a search tool which allows, even encourages in some cases, people to filter messages and other communications based on age.....for instance, if I've said I want to meet women between 25 and 35 I can tick a box and anyone outwith this age bracket trying to contact me will have their message rejected. Perhaps the meetings for sex are a poor example, because people will try specific things at specific times, and age could play a part. There's no suggestion that communications shouldn't be filtered, but isn't this just a generally unhealthy attitude to encourage in our population. Wasn't it granny who taught us how to suck eggs? Are we in danger of encouraging people to only interact with people in their own, or specific, age groups?
I am often part of the ageism scenario in swinging, and quite rightly, people should have thier own personal criteria for who they want to meet and have sex with, large, small, black, white, tall, short, hairy, shaved, old and young, it is sex not friendship, people can have older friends but not want to have sex with them because of thier age.
That said I have found that for everyone that thinks I am too old there are others that prefer an older guy, sometimes because I am the same age group as them, sometimes because a younger guy feels less threatened by having a grandad play with thier younger wife, sometimes because people simply prefer older guys.
The only thing I find a little funny is how many people write me off because of my age when seeing the profile online, yet when we go to clubs those same people are happy to play with us, I have never seen anyone at a club, spot someone they find sexually attractive then refuse to play with them because they ask thier age and find them too old, the truth is if you find someone sexually attractive, you find them sexually attractive and the age of them does not come into it (notwithstanding the legal limits of course)
I am never bothered about being too old because I think personal choice is important and I am quite simply an old git, but I am a happy old git
I noticed that once I turned 40 I got a lot less attention online than I did before ... however, I also realise that nothing's set in stone, and what doesn't necessarily look good "on paper" is totally different to everyday life - people are a lot more flexible and open to surprises in real situations.
I guess it's the thing with online stuff - people lose half their communication skills and reduce each other down to a series of sound-bites and checkboxes, and real life simply isn't like that.
Not that I'm bothered really ... people have all sorts of tastes from skin colour to height and more. As long as I don't miss out then each to their own.
All this talk about being too old over 40, whereas for the most part all I've had on here is that I'm too young at 24. Perhaps that's just an excuse used instead of telling me they simply don't like me, who knows. Either way this time around using SH I've found my apparent youth puts people off more than it did when I was around in 07/08. Outside of SH I don't come across it too severely. As an engineer there are advantages to fresh thinking youths as well as experienced elders, so it's not really much of an issue.
I used to use filters but life taught me that I can be pleasantly surprised when I relax my strict boundaries - be them related to someone's age, profession, colour, ability or lack of, income, etc. I once made the mistake of discounting someone because he didn't fit my tight criteria and when I met him in person I was bowled over by how brilliant he was (brilliant enough to make every negative point pale.) Now I try to keep an open mind and if there is chemistry online, I am almost certain there will be chemistry in real life.
