So, when it comes to the bedroom . . .
Are Swingers better lovers?
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Are Swingers better lovers?
Are Swingers Better Lovers?
Sex God
I hate to be a bitch (actually I quite enjoy it at times 
) but judging by some of the guys we have swung with I would say swinging doesn't necessarily improve your GIB status 
T-J
) but judging by some of the guys we have swung with I would say swinging doesn't necessarily improve your GIB status T-J
Ohhh i have a feeling i'm going to get my legs slapped for this one but you asked our opinion so here mine
To be honest i do not find swingers better lovers, in my experience i find swinging men, more so single ones very selfish lovers who are only in it for what they can get out of it and are not at all bothered if the women is having a good time or not so long as they cum, i find this even more so in clubs when men as a rule cum and go
and have many times had guys walk away from me b4 i have done because they have, once i even had a guy push me away when i tryed to get back on him after changing possitions saying "its ok u can go now i have cum" 
i find most guys in swinging just want a bj and a shag and have many times giving a guy in bj and b4 i have even finished hes had the condom open ready in his hand to put on when i stop :roll: :roll:
Ok so i admit not all the guys i have met thro swinging are like this but i have to say most of them have been.
To be honest i do not find swingers better lovers, in my experience i find swinging men, more so single ones very selfish lovers who are only in it for what they can get out of it and are not at all bothered if the women is having a good time or not so long as they cum, i find this even more so in clubs when men as a rule cum and go
and have many times had guys walk away from me b4 i have done because they have, once i even had a guy push me away when i tryed to get back on him after changing possitions saying "its ok u can go now i have cum" i find most guys in swinging just want a bj and a shag and have many times giving a guy in bj and b4 i have even finished hes had the condom open ready in his hand to put on when i stop :roll: :roll: Ok so i admit not all the guys i have met thro swinging are like this but i have to say most of them have been.
Hmmmm . . . think I could have phrased the question better . . . I'm thinking if your partner (eg long term partner) is also a swinger, or you swing together . . . Does being a swinger make your partner (or prospective partner) a better lover?
A 'one off' with another person in a swinging situation is not quite the same . . .
A 'one off' with another person in a swinging situation is not quite the same . . .
Personally it has bought us closer together, thereby we have become better lovers with each other. After a night of swinging and we get back home that final session as we get into the sack is usually the best 
more intimate and more intense than anything else.
Naughtynymphos1 your remark about single guys is absolutely spot on, we have one guy who swings with us ona regualrly basis and we can see that he is only in it to staisfy himself, the reason w keep him around and don't kick him into touch he is very respectful of boundaries and a dab hand with the camcorder :) oh and a 10 " cock.....
more intimate and more intense than anything else.Naughtynymphos1 your remark about single guys is absolutely spot on, we have one guy who swings with us ona regualrly basis and we can see that he is only in it to staisfy himself, the reason w keep him around and don't kick him into touch he is very respectful of boundaries and a dab hand with the camcorder :) oh and a 10 " cock.....
Quote by steve_j
Personally it has bought us closer together, thereby we have become better lovers with each other. After a night of swinging and we get back home that final session as we get into the sack is usually the best
Our thoughts exactly,we find that our sex life with each other has greatly improved since we swing with others its just sex for us,but with each other it's far more intense!!
Orgasminator
After cough cough ummph erm ahh years of being together, my partners and my sex life had become 'samey' thats not to say it was in any way bad but it had become repetative ( after all there is a finite amount of situations you can develope involvig the same two people) so we tried swinging.....
When you have sex with multiple people, the first thing you discover is that those people have a mulitude of different approaches and techniques to very similar situations. some are very pleasureable and others are not so much fun. If you can bring the pleasureable bits from swinging sex, back to your private sex life then i think it has to generally improve things, as long as a relationship( and ego's) can withstand a partner being open enough to say "Miss X did this in such a way and it was fantastic" etc etc
I think what I am trying to say is that sex, like everything else in life has a learning curve, and the more peoples notes you study the better your final grade will be lol.
When you have sex with multiple people, the first thing you discover is that those people have a mulitude of different approaches and techniques to very similar situations. some are very pleasureable and others are not so much fun. If you can bring the pleasureable bits from swinging sex, back to your private sex life then i think it has to generally improve things, as long as a relationship( and ego's) can withstand a partner being open enough to say "Miss X did this in such a way and it was fantastic" etc etc
I think what I am trying to say is that sex, like everything else in life has a learning curve, and the more peoples notes you study the better your final grade will be lol.
Quote by naughtynymphos1
Ohhh i have a feeling i'm going to get my legs slapped for this one but you asked our opinion so here mine
To be honest i do not find swingers better lovers, in my experience i find swinging men, more so single ones very selfish lovers who are only in it for what they can get out of it and are not at all bothered if the women is having a good time or not so long as they cum, i find this even more so in clubs when men as a rule cum and go...
I can't really understand that mentality as it is rather self defeating in the long term. After all, if you are selfish in bed your partners will not be as willing to have a rematch another time or to experiment new things with you (if they know you are looking for their needs they know that you are more likely to be conscious of their reactions, good or bad, when trying new things).
It's the same with foreplay. When looking at girls we want to kiss their tits, caress their ass or put our hand down their knickers but when having sex most guys seem to only want to cum as fast as possible!?!? Why? Just when they can put your hands all over her they don't seem to want to anymore??? It doesn't make much sense (to me anyway).
Right ok then seeing as i got it wrong the first time round and u wasn't actually meaning people u swing with i'll try again lol
I agree with sleazy (god don't tell him i'll never live it down) that swinging can make u better if u can learn new things from others and take it home with u, but if you ever tell me someone did something better than me ur in the dog house young man
I agree with sleazy (god don't tell him i'll never live it down) that swinging can make u better if u can learn new things from others and take it home with u, but if you ever tell me someone did something better than me ur in the dog house young man
Quote by naughtynymphos1
I have many times had guys walk away from me b4 i have done because they have, once i even had a guy push me away when i tryed to get back on him after changing possitions saying "its ok u can go now i have cum"
Pardon my innocence, but if they are this bad in general, why do you still go back to Clubs?
Quote by sexyscotcarol
Swinging has brought us closer together.
It has spiced up our sex life and encouraged us to experiment and we are having a ball doing it
That's more of the type of experience I can empathise with :-)
There's been a few comments about single guys in clubs, and one or two reactions from guys, but how about guys who are in a relationship with a swinger or swinging partner?
When I look through some relationships (one-to-one) with wonderful women that I have been privileged to know, women with swinging experience seem to be quite remarkable. I don't mean for a minute that every woman, or every person, isn't very special, but I think there's certain things that a more evolved person - especially those that learn from feedback - can learn from swinging (and which the unevolved simply ignore!)
i) you become better at handling jealousy - you learn to appreciate your own space; how that is different from your partner's, how to love yourself more and give and receive love better.
ii) you can become better at certain sexual basics . . . to an evolved person this can simply equate to having had a number of good partners - just that the honesty that goes with swinging maybe affords an opportunity to learn faster. E.g. I have yet to meet a swinger who was clumsy - in the way of climbing over me in bed and resting their elbow/knee with all their weight on me, or other basic inconsiderate things (you can go through several long term partners before finding one that can tactfully put you right). I've yet to come across a woman in swingers clubs that couldn't give a good blow-job (there's many outside of swinging that are proficient of course, but with someone watching you, who doesn't polish up their act, simply out of self respect? - plus you get the chance to learn from others - this is also an opportunity for guys). And I suspect that swingers tend to get better at communicating things they like and don't like more effectively (and politely) - almost as a rule of survival.
iii) I've yet to meet a swinger, especially a clubbing swinger, who wasn't meticulous about personal hygeine. The little things that are too often tactfully overlooked by someone who loves you, whereas you want to be at your best for strangers with whom you are going to be intimate . . . and then it becomes second nature to do it with one you love. Examples - buttholes you could eat your dinner off, fresh breath, scrubbed armpits, (and for guys, all these and) removing stubble. (guys - do you all shave before going to bed with your partner?? Do you wash your armpits before she nuzzles up under one?)
iv) treating sex as seriously as you would any hobby and trying to get better (but not neurotic) about it. Swinging is a hobby (and for many a lifestyle choice) - who wants to be cr*p at it!? yet in a simple one-to-one an inexperienced person (of either sex) can too easily think that's 'it's what's inside that counts' - sure it does - but how you express that outwardly is important too! I think I tend to the view that good sex requires a combination of feeling/passion/emotion AND technical knowledge/experience.
OK, these are just a few thoughts to hopefully maybe even up the balance. I'm very lucky inasmuch I've had almost exclusively good experiences from swinging. It's sad that some of the comments show there are some pretty inconsiderate 'swingers' about and it's not the first time I've heard of negative things. They bring the whole scene down. I like swinging mostly as I feel it offers the possibility of a better way of interacting than traditional relationships, at least for those that like it. (Though I would say that when I've had an even slightly less than brilliant experience, I've tended to say things to myself like, how could I have been more successfully picky? how could I have avoided that? how could I have attracted a better quality experience?)
Some of the comments remind me there's still much to do, still a long way to go. Maybe the example of tolerance, understanding and basic kindness/affection (which a lot of SH-ers show) helps. I've learnt a lot, and a lot about myself, from swinging, I've learnt a lot of good things, that have helped me grow as a person. I know this is a bit waffley for some tastes, but if I didn't feel there were benefits to swinging I wouldn't do it.
Love n hugs
Chris x x
:happy: :rose:
I've certainly learned a few new tricks since I started swinging and I am far more confident sexually than I was before. I've never been a selfish lover and I've always tried to please whoever I was having sex with, my enjoyment is derived from her enjoyment. But overall? Yes, swinging has made me a better lover.
Quote by Rollo Tomassi
I have many times had guys walk away from me b4 i have done because they have, once i even had a guy push me away when i tryed to get back on him after changing possitions saying "its ok u can go now i have cum"
Pardon my innocence, but if they are this bad in general, why do you still go back to Clubs?
where else am i supposed to go?
Ok i do admit i like parties better but i can't just go to a party when u like club are open every day and u can just up and go when u like, i cannot accom cause i have kids and i feel as a woman its unsafe to go to strangers houses, i do not drive so i can't go dogging, so any suggestion welcome lol
Quote by Wishmaster
I've certainly learned a few new tricks since I started swinging and I am far more confident sexually than I was before. I've never been a selfish lover and I've always tried to please whoever I was having sex with, my enjoyment is derived from her enjoyment. But overall? Yes, swinging has made me a better lover.
I would say swinging, chatting to and meeting people on here has made a lot more confident sexually and in general.
I wouldnt say it has made a better lover but certainly a much more confident one.
Carol
