Are swingers really nice????

14 Feb 2005

Went to a club on sat night and had a really good time but it was noticed that when we got talking to some cpls and the conversation moved on to sex , When we explained that we did not swing and only liked to watch and then play alone it was noticable that the mood became very cold. One cpl who we had chatted to for quite a while simply got up and walked away. I can understand before anyone pipes up that we were in a swingers club but that is no excuse for bad manners . Sarah did comment that it made it feel like a meat market. Dont get me wrong we do enjoy being watched and have really good nights but ti seems that although no does mean no it is obvious that it is not liked !! Perhaps this is the ramblings of a cpl who are not Hardened swingers but we treat it as an extension of our sex life but it is obvious some look at it as more of a game .I dont feel we will ever swap even though S is keen to sample the delights of another woman , We still see actual penetration as being something sacred and only for us .
No one need reply but im sure others have had this same experience.

14 Feb 2005

Well what you do seems to be what is classed as 'soft swing'. It is nothing uncommon and I am sure this experience you had was isolated. Give it another go: another club, another night - who knows? Of course I have never been to a club or actually swang... which makes me a bit of a non authority on the subject so let's wait and hear from others. smile

14 Feb 2005

I guess the bottom line is that you do what you feel good with and no more.
Nobody should ask or expect you to do anything you are not comfortable with.
I'm only clutching at straws here but maybe they were the last eggs in the basket and wanted to move on to another couple they could interact with before it got too late.
Still no excuse for bad manners though.

14 Feb 2005

Quote by sexualcpl
Went to a club on sat night and had a really good time but it was noticed that when we got talking to some cpls and the conversation moved on to sex , When we explained that we did not swing and only liked to watch and then play alone it was noticable that the mood became very cold. One cpl who we had chatted to for quite a while simply got up and walked away. I can understand before anyone pipes up that we were in a swingers club but that is no excuse for bad manners . Sarah did comment that it made it feel like a meat market. Dont get me wrong we do enjoy being watched and have really good nights but ti seems that although no does mean no it is obvious that it is not liked !! Perhaps this is the ramblings of a cpl who are not Hardened swingers but we treat it as an extension of our sex life but it is obvious some look at it as more of a game .I dont feel we will ever swap even though S is keen to sample the delights of another woman , We still see actual penetration as being something sacred and only for us .
No one need reply but im sure others have had this same experience.

Clubs usually have at least a few couples that only play on their own. We went to clubs for a long time before we played with others. In that time we made lots of very good friends. We always made it clear at the beginning of a conversation that we did not play. Some couples would make their excuses and leave straight away. Some would chat before they moved on. Eventually though, even the couples we were friendly enough to go out for meals, etc, with would leave us to go and find someone to play with. If you are not going to play with a couple then they may see chatting to you as a "waste of trapping off time".
Personally, we will chat to anyone, but there comes a time when we go off to play, hopefully without appearing rude. The only advice we can offer is to make your position clear at the outset, and then the walkers will walk immediately, giving you a chance to move on to other people that might be more up for a chat. If the club has a jacuzzi, that is often a good place for a social chat as people are very often just relaxing in them.

14 Feb 2005

Quote by sexualcpl
Went to a club on sat night and had a really good time but it was noticed that when we got talking to some cpls and the conversation moved on to sex , When we explained that we did not swing and only liked to watch and then play alone it was noticable that the mood became very cold. One cpl who we had chatted to for quite a while simply got up and walked away. I can understand before anyone pipes up that we were in a swingers club but that is no excuse for bad manners . Sarah did comment that it made it feel like a meat market. Dont get me wrong we do enjoy being watched and have really good nights but ti seems that although no does mean no it is obvious that it is not liked !! Perhaps this is the ramblings of a cpl who are not Hardened swingers but we treat it as an extension of our sex life but it is obvious some look at it as more of a game .I dont feel we will ever swap even though S is keen to sample the delights of another woman , We still see actual penetration as being something sacred and only for us .
No one need reply but im sure others have had this same experience.

In our day, G and I have met and seen loads in clubs, and more often than nowt, ran into couples much like yourselves. Couples that are exhibitionists, voyeurs like to be watched and chose participation at their own discretion.
Further more, I've seen clubs that have allowed single men in without any respect for numbers and I've seen it get nasty and ugly and don't blame other couples for not wanting to play once they've seen the sites.
Personally, don't let people like that ruin your evening. Crack on, do what ever enlightens you and peeks your curiosity. Unless they got a sign over the door stating that you 'must fuck on entrance of this establishment.'
G and I have talked about hitting some of the clubs again, (you know the whole watching and showing thang) but personally, i don't want to play with anyone else and I pity the poor fucker that tries to make me feel that it isn't my choice.
Silk