Awakenings

27 Oct 2006

Bear with me you lot - I've been thinking :shock:
In the 'decades' thread recently, there were comments about sexual awakenings.
I thought about this and keep coming back to it.
What IS a sexual awakening?
Do you think it's the first sexual encounter you experience?
Is it the realisation of what you enjoy sexually?
Is it the realisation that you can also enjoy sex with more than one person?
Is it when you experience something with a person who is not your long-term lover?
I think that it's most of the above, and probably more than that. I know that I would not count my first time as my sexual awakening though (because it was crap).
Your thoughts?

27 Oct 2006

Sexual awakenings - When top shelf magazines aren't just pictures of people with no clothes. :shock:
As a man when your penis takes on a life of its own and starts making its own decisions redface

27 Oct 2006

I feel I've had a couple of times that I could describe as 'sexual awakenings'.
Always having a preference for the ladies my first real sexual experience was with a girl and we were both 14. It was like opening Pandorras box for me (no pun intended so get your mind out of the gutter!), and a night I will never forget.
At 15 I joined a band in London and was taken in hand by a gorgeous Hungarian woman who was the singer. She taught me a thing or two.
I had some fun with guys and experimented but it never felt as satisfying. But then I met my ex boyfriend when I was 19 and everything changed. He was quite a bit older and the 3 years we spen together were very enlightening.

27 Oct 2006

when you get your first hard on rolleyes

27 Oct 2006

Quote by markz
when you get your first hard on

Has that happened to you yet? lol

27 Oct 2006

Quote by Freckledbird
when you get your first hard on

Has that happened to you yet? lol

no but I've got a bigger size pair of boxers ready :roll:

27 Oct 2006

Quote by Freckledbird
Bear with me you lot - I've been thinking :shock:
In the 'decades' thread recently, there were comments about sexual awakenings.
I thought about this and keep coming back to it.
What IS a sexual awakening?
Do you think it's the first sexual encounter you experience?
Is it the realisation of what you enjoy sexually?
Is it the realisation that you can also enjoy sex with more than one person?
Is it when you experience something with a person who is not your long-term lover?
I think that it's most of the above, and probably more than that. I know that I would not count my first time as my sexual awakening though (because it was crap).
Your thoughts?

My sexual awakenings seem to have been coming thick and fast for the past couple of years. For me i think that maturity has brought these on. Being more open minded and of course finding Sh has helped these along. Im discovering new things that i like now but have never thought about before. oh, and always on the look out for more. :twisted:
Louise xx

27 Oct 2006

Quote by markz
when you get your first hard on

Remember a hard-on doesn't count as personal growth. :dry:
For me, sexual awakening was when I discovered what I really liked doing and went ahead and did it! I guess it could mean when you lose your virginity too but then it will mean different things for different people

27 Oct 2006

When a bus ride becomes an erotic experience redface

27 Oct 2006

Quote by keeno
When a bus ride becomes an erotic experience

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Untill a few years back when a close firend of mines son who was going through puberty asked me if that was normall I just thought it was me who had suffered from that surprised

ops:
Now for those that don't understand it wasn't erotic as such but for some reason the daily bus journey into school always seemed to trigger something in a pubescent sheddy :oops:

28 Oct 2006

These can happen at any time in your life, usually when you are so young you don't rmember. But i can remember one incident when I was about 7 or 8, sitting under a piano and seeing the music teacher playing the piano, getting a full on peep at her undercarriage. :P

28 Oct 2006

Being tied up by my sisters friend at the age of 14 and being touch by a girl for the first time.....and liking it :shock:
Going to my first swinging party....and REALLY liking it biggrin

Joining SH and realising that being a horny dirty slut is normal in some circles....and feeling at right at home lol

Horny

28 Oct 2006

Gonna get back to this one.
But my very, very first sexual awakening was when I climbed up a twenty foot rope aged about 12. I orgasmed me way down and was walking around like Groucho Marks fer 10 minutes!!!
.

29 Oct 2006

Quote by Freckledbird
What IS a sexual awakening?
Do you think it's the first sexual encounter you experience?
Is it the realisation of what you enjoy sexually?
Is it the realisation that you can also enjoy sex with more than one person?
Is it when you experience something with a person who is not your long-term lover?
I think that it's most of the above, and probably more than that. I know that I would not count my first time as my sexual awakening though (because it was crap).

Firstly, I think your first time has got to be an awakening by definition. If it is crap then it awakens you to the fact that it can be crap. That said I think all the above can be sexual awakenings.
I was one of the ones who who identified in the decades thread that I'd had an early sexual awakening when young and also another in this current decade.
This latter awakening is my discovery of swinging and more particularly its 'moral code'.
This relates particularly to the fact that, as a couple, swinging can actually strengthen your relationship. Angelica and I agree that swinging has done this for us. It has engendered an environment of total trust and of giving to eachother. This has been a true learning experience.
Another thing is that, from a couple's perspective, being friends with another couple whilst swinging is 'OK'. (that's not to say that a couple being friends with a single is not OK but it is much more difficult).
.

29 Oct 2006

Mine was when I met my husband!... Until then an orgasm was something I did secretly after sex as the guys in question didn't quite understand me or my needs lol.. maybe my fault for being too shy. Making love to my hubby for the first time I ended up crying because it had taken me 30 years to experience what I did that night.... then of course few years later we came into this form of extra naughtiness! lol
hump

29 Oct 2006

I think there's a bit more of an awakening with your life partner, after you've swung with someone and realised how important your own partner is to you.

29 Oct 2006

Quote by Freckledbird
I think there's a bit more of an awakening with your life partner, after you've swung with someone and realised how important your own partner is to you.

Amen to that :thumbup:

30 Oct 2006

I've always taken "sexual awakenings" to mean a major shift in sexual appreciation?
The awakening comes when you are moved to a new type of sexuality by someone or something that you were not aware of before? Like the bus ride!

30 Oct 2006

I agree with that Shayz!
I first had sex at 15. This was NOT an awakening. My actual sexual awakenings came at around 13 when I did it myself and then again at 26 when I first had sex with someone who cared enough about me to make sure I enjoyed it. Then again when we both discovered SH.
Love
FIRE x

30 Oct 2006

Quote by Freckledbird
I think there's a bit more of an awakening with your life partner, after you've swung with someone and realised how important your own partner is to you.

Defo, and its makes you stronger as a couple, I think. smile

31 Oct 2006

I thought of the obvious 'virginity' awakening first...

31 Oct 2006

Quote by jaymar
I think there's a bit more of an awakening with your life partner, after you've swung with someone and realised how important your own partner is to you.

Defo, and its makes you stronger as a couple, I think. smile

I think that but the relationship has to be strong in the first place.
.

1 Nov 2006

Quote by westerross
I think there's a bit more of an awakening with your life partner, after you've swung with someone and realised how important your own partner is to you.

Defo, and its makes you stronger as a couple, I think. smile

I think that but the relationship has to be strong in the first place.
.
Of course, but do you agree that no matter how strong a relationship is, there is always room for improvement? When I said stronger I sort of meant goes from strength to strength, its a personal thing really I feel I just keep loving him more and more each day. Does anyone agree? Can you love anyone more than you already do?

1 Nov 2006

Quote by shayz1
I've always taken "sexual awakenings" to mean a major shift in sexual appreciation?
The awakening comes when you are moved to a new type of sexuality by someone or something that you were not aware of before? Like the bus ride!

I totally agree, my first orgasm on my own was at 14 which was so mindblowing that I had to keep repeating frightened in case it disappeared :haha: Then I had years of disappointing non orgasmic sex until the age of 30.

1 Nov 2006

Quote by jaymar
I think there's a bit more of an awakening with your life partner, after you've swung with someone and realised how important your own partner is to you.

Defo, and its makes you stronger as a couple, I think. smile

I think that but the relationship has to be strong in the first place.
.
Of course, but do you agree that no matter how strong a relationship is, there is always room for improvement? When I said stronger I sort of meant goes from strength to strength, its a personal thing really I feel I just keep loving him more and more each day. Does anyone agree? Can you love anyone more than you already do?
I think that you can love your partner more and more, not that you dont love them enough in the first place but i think that the longer you are together and the more you discover about yourselves together you seem to get a closeness that you cant possibly have within the first few years of a relationship. Growing more comfortable with each other as the years go by. The closer that we get and the more we discover, the love seems to get more and more intense. I cant imagine ever being without him and having to start all over again. If i ever could.
Louise xx

3 Nov 2006

Quote by louise_and_joe
I think there's a bit more of an awakening with your life partner, after you've swung with someone and realised how important your own partner is to you.

Defo, and its makes you stronger as a couple, I think. smile

I think that but the relationship has to be strong in the first place.
.
Of course, but do you agree that no matter how strong a relationship is, there is always room for improvement? When I said stronger I sort of meant goes from strength to strength, its a personal thing really I feel I just keep loving him more and more each day. Does anyone agree? Can you love anyone more than you already do?
I think that you can love your partner more and more, not that you dont love them enough in the first place but i think that the longer you are together and the more you discover about yourselves together you seem to get a closeness that you cant possibly have within the first few years of a relationship. Growing more comfortable with each other as the years go by. The closer that we get and the more we discover, the love seems to get more and more intense. I cant imagine ever being without him and having to start all over again. If i ever could.
Louise xx
I couldn't have put it better myself :color:

3 Nov 2006

Quote by Freckledbird
What IS a sexual awakening?

To me it was "becoming sexual" as opposed to just having sex. Learning about my liks and dislikes and being confident enough to experiment, admit to certain likes and dislikes.

Quote by Freckledbird
Do you think it's the first sexual encounter you experience?

Certainly wasn't with me ... but others may well think so for themselves.

Quote by Freckledbird
Is it the realisation of what you enjoy sexually?

I'd go along with this ...

Quote by Freckledbird
Is it the realisation that you can also enjoy sex with more than one person?

Part of it was ..... developing as a sexual person, meant that I could accept that on person might limit my/our experience.

Quote by Freckledbird
Is it when you experience something with a person who is not your long-term lover?

Sometimes ... nice to experience different things, techniques, ideas .... also nice to bring some of them home to long-term partner.

3 Nov 2006

Quote by louise_and_joe
I think there's a bit more of an awakening with your life partner, after you've swung with someone and realised how important your own partner is to you.

Defo, and its makes you stronger as a couple, I think. smile

I think that but the relationship has to be strong in the first place.
.
Of course, but do you agree that no matter how strong a relationship is, there is always room for improvement? When I said stronger I sort of meant goes from strength to strength, its a personal thing really I feel I just keep loving him more and more each day. Does anyone agree? Can you love anyone more than you already do?
I think that you can love your partner more and more, not that you dont love them enough in the first place but i think that the longer you are together and the more you discover about yourselves together you seem to get a closeness that you cant possibly have within the first few years of a relationship. Growing more comfortable with each other as the years go by. The closer that we get and the more we discover, the love seems to get more and more intense. I cant imagine ever being without him and having to start all over again. If i ever could.
Louise xx
This sub-thread started on the basis of swinging strengthening your relationship. Are we still talking about this here or are we talking about your love for your partner which grows stronger naturally?
My point was that swinging can bring tensions into a relationship. If you have a strong relationship to start with then it is likely to get stronger with those tensions. If it is not strong to start with then the tensions are likely to blow it apart.
.

3 Nov 2006

Quote by louise_and_joe
I think there's a bit more of an awakening with your life partner, after you've swung with someone and realised how important your own partner is to you.

Defo, and its makes you stronger as a couple, I think. smile

I think that but the relationship has to be strong in the first place.
.
Of course, but do you agree that no matter how strong a relationship is, there is always room for improvement? When I said stronger I sort of meant goes from strength to strength, its a personal thing really I feel I just keep loving him more and more each day. Does anyone agree? Can you love anyone more than you already do?
I think that you can love your partner more and more, not that you dont love them enough in the first place but i think that the longer you are together and the more you discover about yourselves together you seem to get a closeness that you cant possibly have within the first few years of a relationship. Growing more comfortable with each other as the years go by. The closer that we get and the more we discover, the love seems to get more and more intense. I cant imagine ever being without him and having to start all over again. If i ever could.
Louise xx
This sub-thread started on the basis of swinging strengthening your relationship. Are we still talking about this here or are we talking about your love for your partner which grows stronger naturally?
My point was that swinging can bring tensions into a relationship. If you have a strong relationship to start with then it is likely to get stronger with those tensions. If it is not strong to start with then the tensions are likely to blow it apart.
.