Not that I can spek for anyone but clubs' in this scenario, only facilitate meeting people with similar taste or people,I guess ,in a swinging environment have a fairly open approach to what anyone would find to be a turn on,and would try to be considerate to a person's taste.I for one find the concept and imagery of Bdsm to be pretty erotic,I'm seriously not into pain,and even more seriously not into inflicting what i'm tryin to say is 'clubs' are just a collection of people with tastes desires and 've all got limits and always pretty much everything goes as long as people are all happy bunnies,but the connection rate is going to go down proportioately with the extremity of any particlar fetish Always feel that the big criterion is integrity.......making people feel respected,safe, and happy.
Take care and Happy swinging
It's interesting and completely understandable, that most people make an automatic association between BDSM and pain.
Where pain for pleasure certainly is a big part of things for many people, it is really a multi-faceted area. I think that the problem is that the term BDSM tries to encompass all possible elements under this umbrella.
For many, though there is much to be gained from a relationship where dominance and submission are the key elements. This is often played out in a mental and emotional way, rather than with canes and floggers etc.
For others, bondage is important, perhaps the experience of being tied up, or enclosed in, for example rubber.
Then there is a whole other area of sensation play.
I would say that we both are a mixture of all these (and probably more) elements.
We're in total agreement those of you who have posted, mentioning the trust issue. It's a massive consideration for a whole variety of reasons.
I guess that there are different levels though. I mean a little sensation play, I would have thought would be a real asset to a scene. I doubt that it would be wise to go much further than this with someone you don't know well.
I do think that we will play in the dungion rooms together, because it's what we love to do, but if we get into a scene with anyone at a club, naturally we wouldn't hope for anything other than a sexual encounter.
It has been a consideration when we wrote our ad on S H that being open about what we do might scare off any potential enquirers, because they might think that we require them to be tied to the bed and beaten black and blue lol.
Hopefully we have been clear that we don't actually need floggers and clamps to have a good time. lol
I think it depends on what interests you in the BDSM scene.......
I love going to fetish clubs mainly for the atmosphere, dressing up bit and most of meeting some great peeps......... an I love rubber on a fella, especially if I know the guys turn on is wearing rubber... gets me all goosepimply thinking about it!!
Sensation play definately (I think hehe) could be part of a swinging experience (an I dont know much about swinigng) as can be wearing ya fetish gear! Long as everyone knows your kinks, boundaries and they are clear to all.... enjoy!! If it isnt others scene.... you dont go there, enjoy the situation for what it is.
I'll go back to my lurking mode now!!!
xanaisx
I will make a large post on this subject tomorrow as me and Tony are into all 3 of these scenes quite heavily.....
I ain't going to attempt it tonight though as i am to knackered and the site won't let me post anything big at the moment
Shaz x
I am sure you can happily combine the two as you are a couple and will always be there to look after each other when scening with strangers.
I don't know which of you is the top and which the bottom or if you are both switches but I can see the top tying up the bottom and letting others feel him/her to get the horny juices flowing, then a bit of play between the two being witnessed by an audience, then perhaps a little menage a trois ... yes, the more I think of it, it could work out very well.
My one complaint about BDSM clubs was that things stopped short of penetration and that never really made sense to me as BDSM is a highly sexual activity for me. One thing I would advise is wait and see how serious the play gets in the swinging clubs before indulding into any heavy play as that might shock innocent bystanders. Also you have to be very vigilant of your toys in case someone decides to use them. (I once took my pinwheel to a party and it went from hand to hand without even people asking my permission to touch it and I freaked out because it is so easy to prick one's finger with it and spread disease. Needless to say I did not use it, thereafter.)
Enjoy!
BDSM/Fetish & Swinging are, in my Hummmble....perfect arenas for a full and erotic experience played out between people involving a potentially huuuuge range of emotions and physical sensations...
... however.....
In my experience, when it comes to BDSM clubs, there seem (and I only say *seem*) to be rules regarding the more sexually inclined acts of swingers.
Sex itsself appears to be frowned on... Many a scene can be played out reaching to all sorts of levels, though an actual penetrative act involving bodies, and not toys etc seems to have a line drawn before it!
and I wonder why?
(its not true to say this of all fetish clubs, but its there all the same)
I enjoy (or rather did, as I havent indulged a great deal recently) the fetish scene for an atmosphere.. a very liberating experience, even if simply observing the scenes of others, and having an open enough mind to appreciate new experiences...
Personally *heavy* painfull play (at present at least) is not my bag at all.. though I do find a very strong sexual charge in fetish/BDSM clubs... and wonder why more indulgance in a sex/swinging scenario isnt appreciated.
hmmmm
I dunno
LP
londonplaything
So am I unusual in my desire to be tied down naked in leather collar, wrist and ankle cuffs, and used by such selected people as my partner dictates..?
I must be in the minority that allow control of me by my partner (and others under her supervision) and thoroughly enjoying it. It's not about pain for us, but the erotiscm of the event.
We do engage in sexual congress with others, in a swinging environment, same room full swap as we enjoy watching each other having fun with others of a like and similar mind. On the other side of the coin, I enjoy being her plaything, both alone and in company. She enjoys watching (and joining in) others taking pleasure from me. As well as being the one that takes the pleasure herself......
So, yes we believe there is a cross over between swinging and BDSM.
Anyone that fancies joining in is welcome to drop us a note
ah... now then.... dont get me wrong here..
I believe that the swing/BDSM cross/overlap might be frowned upon in certain places, and by certain players indeed... though here as in everything else: each to their own, and good luck/happy play to those who know what they enjoy, and know where to play, and who to play with..
all limits are for the individuals after all...
BUT:... I personally like the hinterland between what are currently the generally seperate areas of BDSM, fetish & Swinging...
more of it...
>please<
LP
londonplaything
I've just read a very interesting thread on this very subject on a BDSM site. It has over 60 posts on it, and makes for interesting reading.
I'm not sure of the etiquette of posting a link here to another site, althouh its a completely free site and is not a swingers one so I shouldn't think it's a problem, but I'll refrain from so doing for now.
However, if anyone is interested to see it, then I'll send you the link if you pm me.
G x
Thanks for your reply! I had a funny idea it was that one you were talking about......it usre was a long thread lol
I think Ive seen another too... see if i can find the link to it for you...
xanaisx
Had to think about this one prior to posting and even now I don't think I can explain myself properly, so it may sound garbled.
The biggest problem between the two genres basically boils down to understanding, or a lack of generally.
Swingers don't understand BDSM and BDSM'ers don't understand swingers. Swingers fuck for pleasure, are prepared to do so privately or publically, with one partner or multiple partners. BDSM is intensly private IMO, despite scenes being played out in public, the satisfaction is generally down to trust, limits and sensation and these things vary from person to person. Penetrative sex is not necessarily the ultimate ending ... whereas in swinging it is.
Just because a person is happy to be flogged in front of a group does not mean they are open minded about sex in general.
The BDSM/swinging balance seems to be crossing over more, since I joined two years ago there are a lot more threads and ads addressing the combined needs. BDSM seems to be more accepted and discussed. However, I think talk is possibly as far as it gets a lot of the time, because the trust needed for a BDSM scene cannot be gained quickly and I suspect whilst a lot of people fantasise about BDSM they are very wary about reality.
I am more into BDSM than swinging, Morbius, more into the swinging, and we do tend to balance out quite well but the BDSM I have never explored with this community, purely down to trust.
Anyone can wield a flogger or whip, but do you really want to play with someone who thinks BDSM is good but is essentially a swinger just wanting a shag?
I really don't believe that the two can be interlinked easily ... not that they won't ever, but there just isn't enough understanding of the two genres.
Cx
:gagged: 
we are intrigued to see how much people from either side of the fence (for want of a much better phrase) view each other.
:whistling:
