Being comfortble with single guys

13 Jul 2005

This may have been done in fact probably has. Bonnie and I have had a male friend who we have had fun with who to be honest with you I'm not to comfortable with anymore in a sexual situation , and Bonnie agrees. Thing is he is a close friend to start with so I trusted him entirely and that is the problem... kind of.
If we were to seek another male friend I know I would find it very difficult on a trust basis, so I was wondering if anyone had advice to give. Do you just get a feeling for someone if you meet them. I understand most genuine males would have no problem if we met and nothing happened on a first meet but I'm wondering what people on SH look for on a meet.
Daft thing about this is if something were to happen on an accidental dogging scenario I would probably be more comfortable as it would be more a chance encounter and less of a social challenge aswell, none of the your place or mine kind of thing. Oh and that isn't an invite lol

This probably sounds as if we are not sure about the lifestyle but that is not the case as I said at the beginning of the post we have had some good fun times with our male friend with no real problems. Anyways I hope you understand what I mean and appologies for the long post.

13 Jul 2005

It can be hard to complicate friendship (as in mates) with sex as well, at least in my experience.
I've been lucky enough to cultivate some friends-with-benefits where we have worked out that the best thing to do is decide in advance of going out whether it's a chat night or a shag night.
All the same, the most successful arrangements have been where either they are just friends or we meet for sex, it seems hard to mix and match the two.
So I'd recommend meeting anyone new with a view to making them a sex partner but clarifying in advance that you really need to get to know them before there is any sex.
There are lots of ways you can do that, but I'd start with a social just to see how you feel - if not sure, another one, then gradually work up to the sexual side of it.
The people who make good long-term fuckbuddies will have the patience to tolerate it. Those who don't - well, you can do without them anyhow.

13 Jul 2005

Hi,
Why not try a few munches, they're the perfect way to get to know people before deciding if you want to shag them. There have been plenty in your area recently and more are planned. I believe the next one is Sept 24th in Donny. ( check the date in LMU )
Look at the threads for the last one to see what a great night it is even if you just end up having a social event,