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BIoke's virtual fantasy sex party

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BIoke you bad but very very funny :giggle:
Quote by Dawnie
BIoke you bad but very very funny :giggle:

jdw's not impressed, I can tell wink One more frown and he'll go in the back yard where Mal has just started the 'tie a sausage to yer gonads and see if you outrun the Staffie' game :twisted:
Quote by BIoke
BIoke you bad but very very funny :giggle:

jdw's not impressed, I can tell wink One more frown and he'll go in the back yard where Mal has just started the 'tie a sausage to yer gonads and see if you outrun the Staffie' game :twisted:
eh??
Quote by jdwxxx
BIoke you bad but very very funny :giggle:

jdw's not impressed, I can tell wink One more frown and he'll go in the back yard where Mal has just started the 'tie a sausage to yer gonads and see if you outrun the Staffie' game :twisted:
eh??

awww jd our man of few words but many pictures lol
cute pussy :wink:
All though my new found intrests in the male form are very exciting the are along the same line's as DM's will be I would think, but I don't think I could take on the dominance role as well as he would, and Im sure there would be no need for the lovely splendid to offer either of us the use of her very threatening strapon, thou it would seem she as taken a peep to see if I would be intrested in fun along those line's, sorry Bloke/splendid thanks but no thanks,I sure there would be other's at the party that would happily stand in line for you pleasure, and I really don't see DM taking the sub role and supplying me with the bumfun I enjoy,but if there are any male's at the party that would like to see us having fun with there ladies, and then be dominated by us both and made to preform oraly on us, :twisted: all very selfish I know but that's the way it is, so if your not to faint hearted come on down.
Quote by MasterandLady
...but if there are any male's at the party that would like to see us having fun with there ladies, and then be dominated by us both and made to preform oraly on us.....

So.... if I'm reading this correctly, you want me to sing to you at the party? lol
OK, well that wasn't on my original list of 'things to do' but I'll think about it.. I can do show tunes and a really lovely version of 'Whip Crack Away'. Will that work? :twisted:
Varca - you get a seat for free. Bring ice cream, popcorn, condoms and lube.. wink
Oi let me out this cellar, Im off to JWD's party sorry bloke, as he sneaks some can's under his jacket. lol
Quote by varca
How much are ring/cage side seats going for? :grin:

lol what a fine masterpiece!
This thread has be in stiches
Quote by brucie
is the old queen still going on about his imaginary party??? :twisted:

Sorry, did some neanderthal man just grunt or is there a pig at my party?
Oh, wait, here he is... brucie, so glad you could make it, you seem confused. Anything I can help with? lol
That can't be right, it appears to be demonstatring a high enough level of development to use tools.
lp
Quote by BIoke
is the old queen still going on about his imaginary party??? :twisted:

Sorry, did some neanderthal man just grunt or is there a pig at my party?
Oh, wait, here he is... brucie, so glad you could make it, you seem confused. Anything I can help with? lol

:laughabove::laughabove::laughabove:
Quote by jdwxxx

Who's she - it looks like she has something pink leaking out of her back lady-bottom confused
string...
She's one of those easy inflatables then
Hmmmm...
"Do not inflate your Barbie Doll until after jumping out of the window and please remove all high-heeled shoes before doing so.."
I don't know what the people in the apartments opposite must be thinking - I've had dialled 911 by now!
Quote by BIoke
Hmmmm...
I don't know what the people in the apartments opposite must be thinking - I've had dialled 911 by now!

Is that her number??? :grin:
Mal
wink
Quote by Mal
Hmmmm...
I don't know what the people in the apartments opposite must be thinking - I've had dialled 911 by now!

Is that her number??? :grin:
Mal
wink
I don't know but I wish she'd come down - it's all because neilfromleeds stole the bloke she showed up with and came back dressed in her sussies, with him on his back.
Who else can we invite Mal? :twisted:
Bluexxx
She gave me the opportunity with her parties for me to let loose my games and much fun was had by all!! :twisted:
Anyway, why should this be a fantasy party, Bloke - get it organised!!! lol
Mal
wink
Quote by BIoke

At my virtual fantasy sex party there would be:
Noladreams - we're virtually inseparable nowadays and she knows my next move now like any girlfriend should rotflmao She can also count the 'oh fuck yeah's!'. Actually, she can almost predict by facial expression the next time one is coming... a bit like labour contractions. Her main role though would be to help me out with all of the massive cocks and lovely bums that would be there.

Yep, I'll come. I make a decent caiprinhas and I can totally get with the massive cock and lovely bum aspect of the role.
I'd like TheLovelyOne to be invited too... she and I could help out with the rugby team and then hone our Dorothy Parker-esque put downs.
In fact, if we invite Will he can open his cocktail bar and I can forget caiprinha duties and concentrate more on cocks and arses! :giggle:
Did somebody mention massive cocks?
The Lovely One thanks BIoke for his kind invitation and is delighted to accept!
Quote by TheLovelyOne
Did somebody mention massive cocks?
The Lovely One thanks BIoke for his kind invitation and is delighted to accept!

Would you like one more bigggg one?
You're going to need a massively exhibitionist anal slut with a big cock, aren't you?
Quote by varca
Lube... lube....??? I never need lube :grin:

Mix it with rock salt... it keeps them on their toes :rascal:
I actually had a really weird dream last night... and I think some of the scenarios from this thread featured in it!
:shock:
Quote by varca

Mix it with rock salt... it keeps them on their toes :rascal:

You're a closet sadist aren't you? :grin:
I like it though, might come in useful sometime :lol2:
DM makes mental note "bring own lube"
Quote by noladreams
I actually had a really weird dream last night... and I think some of the scenarios from this thread featured in it!
:shock:

To tie this in to the thread about the mysterious vibrating vibrator in the middle of the night...
Sleep wanking?
lol ;)
Quote by DungeonMaster
DM makes mental note "bring own lube"

BIoke makes mental note "bring rock salt" lol
An-y-ways... installment two of my virtual sex party coming later today/tonight.
Featuring:
- brucie gets gang-banged by five ladyboys with my pants in his mouth
- oneoclockgun slips on the fruit bowl and stands up with a smile on his lips :lol:
- dungeonmaster teaches varca & RO the real meaning of the word 'sir'
- bouncy & thelovelyone get lost in steam and cock in the shower room when the London Wasps pay a surprise visit
- flower and kents get creampied – nuff said!
- poshkate’s personal trainer finds out the Body Pump session he thought he was coming to run wasn’t quite what he expected
- tmann kicks off the ‘big one’ competition in the Conservatory and amuses the 85 year old neighbour having a late afternoon tea party next door
- littlegem sells neil's bum to me for two goldfish and a tube of smarties and throws in nola's mysterious vibrator to boot!
Back later x
i dont suppose theres room in the shower with bouncy and thelovelyone?? theres plenty of wasps to go round wink
*scoffs*
I look forward to the instalment... although, right now, one may have him for the measley sum a half a goldfish and a previously sucked boiled sweet.
(A common one no less, plain/ bording ugly fish with horrid poppy eyes and a squint, not even a pretty talented ironing goldfish with a wispy fin, long lustrous tail and sparkly muli-toned scales... Why? Such a bargain for fish attitude on this fine Saturday early afternoon? ... you may ask. Well, because the day has been wasted, yet again, by my gorgeous but grumpy rolleyes And have you seen the weather outside? Glorious. Even for northern standards. confused We could be sunbathing by the toxic pit lake that ever-so-slightly glows in the dark. If you can't get a tan by that bit of chemical waste, well, nothing will ever work. ;) )
*adds PK's BODY PUMP instructor to her wish list and skips off for lunch*
kiss LG. x
Quote by little gem
*scoffs*
I look forward to the instalment... although, right now, one may have him for the measley sum a half a goldfish and a previously sucked boiled sweet.
(A common one no less, plain/ bording ugly fish with horrid poppy eyes and a squint, not even a pretty talented ironing goldfish with a wispy fin, long lustrous tail and sparkly muli-toned scales... Why? Such a bargain for fish attitude on this fine Saturday early afternoon? ... you may ask. Well, because the day has been wasted, yet again, by my gorgeous but grumpy rolleyes And have you seen the weather outside? Glorious. Even for northern standards. confused We could be sunbathing by the toxic pit lake that ever-so-slightly glows in the dark. If you can't get a tan by that bit of chemical waste, well, nothing will ever work. ;) )
*adds PK's BODY PUMP instructor to her wish list and skips off for lunch*
kiss LG. x

Could you not just lift what little there is of grumpy-mr-sleepy-cat and take him outside.
He is but a slip of a man
wink
lol I've fed him up Lairdy! ;)
I know I could probably still lift him if I really tried... and got a good grip before he woke... but, I don't think I'd endanger my health by encountering the wrath! It'd end up like trying to feed a cat medication.... a futile excercise in a battle of wills, of which I would most likely loose! :lol:
kiss LG. x
Quote by little gem
lol I've fed him up Lairdy! ;)
I know I could probably still lift him if I really tried... and got a good grip before he woke... but, I don't think I'd endanger my health by encountering the wrath! It'd end up like trying to feed a cat medication.... a futile excercise in a battle of wills, of which I would most likely loose! :lol:
kiss LG. x

If you need a hand shifting him give me a shout. I'm sure we could all do it together wink xx