Has a comment or event ever changed your life??
Last year a friend of mine at work was talking about a girl she knew,she looked at me and said "I dont want this to sound awful but i know how BIG you are but she is huge!"
Well that comment was the one that spurred me on to loose my weight.I havent reached my target yet but i know that thanks to that comment it changed my view of myself.
It hurt like hell to hear at the time,but now im thankful that she said it,because i wasnt comfortable with myself and she actually did me a favour.
Someone very close to me was an alcoholic,at the time when me and Steve quit smoking i think we spurred her on to quit the only pitty now is that due to some stressful circumstances at the start of the year we started she quit the drink for good and i am soo happy for her.
So has this happened to any of you too?Has one of these things ever made you change your outlook on life,and made you do anything about it for the better??
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Changing your outlook on life
Orgasminator
Has a comment or event ever changed your life??
A pivotal moment in my life from which everything changed dramatically happened ten years ago this coming February. My then husband Nigel tossed a Compuserve disc to me and said 'here, put this on your machine... you might have fun with this!'
So two on-line romances, finding a new love, starting a WWW business... getting a divorce... getting to go to LA several times... meeting friends from all over the world... re-discovering Northern Soul 'cos of the Net... then finding the absolute love of my life... is all as a result of that moment in an office on a murky February evening...
Good thread Clare!
Quote by Clare_Lincs
Has a comment or event ever changed your life??
Last year a friend of mine at work was talking about a girl she knew,she looked at me and said "I dont want this to sound awful but i know how BIG you are but she is huge!"
Urgh! Glad that worked out positively for you Clare.
I am a small build, and was always naturally skinny, people used to comment and compliment me on this even though I was just lucky, I never needed to diet, and never put any work into staying slim, so the compliments were undeserved really.
Then I became fat. It really brought the trolls out of the woodwork
One woman approached me and asked me if I had put on weight (it was obvious, I`d gained three and a half stone) embarrassed I said yes, and she went on to say that I had been lovely and thin..............how did this happen?!`
How DARE she expect me to `explain myself` :x
Another `friend who I see less often, who is rather large herself, crowed enormously when she visited and saw the weight gain, she loved it, yet when she visited after I lost the wieght, she didn`t say a word. I mentioned the weight loss the last time she visited, she merely gave me a dirty look and said `yes, so I see`, no well done, nothing! I hadn`t crowed, it was just a casual mention to see if she was capable of dishing out a compliment as well as she could the pisstake. She couldn`t.
Sorry, this touched a nerve!
I lost the weight, and am still losing it. In fact I`m keeping an eye on just how much I am losing because some of it was due to illness, and at 8 1/2 stone I don`t want to lose anymore, but I am glad I lost the weight, because it just didn`t suit me, some women look great being a size 16+, I didn`t.
Hmmm, things that changed my life?
When it was pointed out to me that I was my own worse bully. I am much more relaxed about how I react to given situations now, I no longer go home and flay myself for not doing things differently..........well, not too often anyway!
Oh, and succumbing to depression a few years ago. Natures wake up call for not spotting things for myself. Did me a HUGE favour in the longrun.
Venusxxx
I suppose really the thing that changed my life (at 41 years old) was someone in the chat room telling me I was too old to be there!!!!
We had been sort of slowly getting into the swinging scene, but hadnt been brave enough to go to any of the parties. After being told we were too old, I thought "f*** you" and put our name down for our first party.
Well, we have been to one or two now, and have met some really lovely people, and are looking forward to meeting more at the NW Munch.
It could have gone either way, I could have disappeared off into the sunset with a lump in my throat and a tear in my eye feeling quite sad, but I'm tough.
However, if you're reading this (the person who told me I was too old). Just think on. You can really hurt someone with a careless word.
Jules n Dave
We had been sort of slowly getting into the swinging scene, but hadnt been brave enough to go to any of the parties. After being told we were too old, I thought "f*** you" and put our name down for our first party.
Well, we have been to one or two now, and have met some really lovely people, and are looking forward to meeting more at the NW Munch.
It could have gone either way, I could have disappeared off into the sunset with a lump in my throat and a tear in my eye feeling quite sad, but I'm tough.
However, if you're reading this (the person who told me I was too old). Just think on. You can really hurt someone with a careless word.
Jules n Dave
Sex God
life changing moments..... wow....
i think i have had a few...... nearly dying when i was 14 calmed me down.... i was living in the states and was a cocky SOB... then got caught up in the crossfire of a post office raid...bullet skinned my eyebrow... and i know that if i didn't change that was the direction i was heading....
after getting back my A level mock results, i had a teacher say to me "why are you apply to universities, you were never good enough for it in the first place" to which i told him to "screw himself"..... told hime to "screw himself" again when i good what i needed...
almost going blind after getting congunitivitus in both eyes...... not knowing if you are going to regain your sight is one of the hardest things i have ever had to go thru......and it taught me to live everyday......
sean xxxxxxx
i think i have had a few...... nearly dying when i was 14 calmed me down.... i was living in the states and was a cocky SOB... then got caught up in the crossfire of a post office raid...bullet skinned my eyebrow... and i know that if i didn't change that was the direction i was heading....
after getting back my A level mock results, i had a teacher say to me "why are you apply to universities, you were never good enough for it in the first place" to which i told him to "screw himself"..... told hime to "screw himself" again when i good what i needed...
almost going blind after getting congunitivitus in both eyes...... not knowing if you are going to regain your sight is one of the hardest things i have ever had to go thru......and it taught me to live everyday......
sean xxxxxxx
I lost a lot of weight after being dumped by my first proper girlfriend (day after my eighteenth birthday) Bought weights, went jogging 3 times a week, swimming etc. Got fit, slim, toned. Didn't make any difference as she still didn't want me but I felt a lot better about myself.
Fast forward 16 years and I'm pretty much back where I was, a bit overweight but happy because I realised that self esteem doesn't just come from how you look, for me, it came from facing my fears about rejection and finally understanding that some people love me because of who I am, not because of what I look like
Fast forward 16 years and I'm pretty much back where I was, a bit overweight but happy because I realised that self esteem doesn't just come from how you look, for me, it came from facing my fears about rejection and finally understanding that some people love me because of who I am, not because of what I look like
Sex God
The life changing moment was on the bus one day and I saw a girl with bright pink hair. I used to have bright pink hair and I loved it. I dyed it a different colour every month at one point and was having great laughs with it. Some colours were great, others made me look like grotbags! Guess which colour that was! hehehe
Anyway, my boyfriend at the time said if you ever dye your hair a strange colour again I'd dump you.
This was a guy who had expressed interest in marrying me and had been together for 2years. I wondered what other creative and expressive avenues he was going to ban me from. :shock: Needless to say it was a turning point in the relationship and it broke down when I went to live abroad for a few months.
Best thing that happened us splitting up. I would't have or be as happy and confident as I am now!
Anyway, my boyfriend at the time said if you ever dye your hair a strange colour again I'd dump you.
This was a guy who had expressed interest in marrying me and had been together for 2years. I wondered what other creative and expressive avenues he was going to ban me from. :shock: Needless to say it was a turning point in the relationship and it broke down when I went to live abroad for a few months.
Best thing that happened us splitting up. I would't have or be as happy and confident as I am now!
Sex God
wow, what moving stories.
a big communal :therethere: and
from us. x
a big communal :therethere: and
from us. x 
Sexlightened
I've got to say after reading these stories what a lovely, strong bunch of people you are. Big hugs to all of you. I'm afraid mine is a little more mundane but just as special to me- the birth of my two sons
Although they can be pains at times I still love them very much and would do anything for them.
Although they can be pains at times I still love them very much and would do anything for them.
Thanks to all of you for such honest replies,and Calista you have a pm hun!
Its reassuring that everyone has insecurities in the "real" world and that people provoke reactions in you guys aswell,keep em coming its extremely interesting reading!
(makes a change for a thread of mine! :shock: )
Its reassuring that everyone has insecurities in the "real" world and that people provoke reactions in you guys aswell,keep em coming its extremely interesting reading!
(makes a change for a thread of mine! :shock: )
Quote by Steve_Lincs
Calista,that is one of the most moving things ive ever heard,it must have taken a lot to write that for all to see.
Heres a big :therethere: and
Thanks
I do consider myself lucky, I was young enough to start again .... many women don't leave and live the horror of domestic violence daily. My best friend was my saviour, had she not have took me away and given me the break I'd possibly still be there.
Calista,
You've got alot of guts... both for writing what you did but also getting away from the abusive ex. I have a few female friends that have been in the same situation, and from what I've seen, the hardest thing is making the decision to do so in the first place.
My life-changing event was 11th Sept 2001. In the wake of that, the US software company I was working for closed down the UK office and sacked everyone here when all our customers stopped spending money as the IT industry stalled. I'd spent the last year putting my heart and soul into building up the UK business, first I had to fire all the people I'd worked with and then fire myself! This hit me hard, but sent me off looking for ways to make a living that I actually enjoy.
Coming up for 3 years later, I'm earning less than half of what I used to, but wake up every day feeling much more fulfilled.......
You've got alot of guts... both for writing what you did but also getting away from the abusive ex. I have a few female friends that have been in the same situation, and from what I've seen, the hardest thing is making the decision to do so in the first place.
My life-changing event was 11th Sept 2001. In the wake of that, the US software company I was working for closed down the UK office and sacked everyone here when all our customers stopped spending money as the IT industry stalled. I'd spent the last year putting my heart and soul into building up the UK business, first I had to fire all the people I'd worked with and then fire myself! This hit me hard, but sent me off looking for ways to make a living that I actually enjoy.
Coming up for 3 years later, I'm earning less than half of what I used to, but wake up every day feeling much more fulfilled.......
The moment that changed my life the most was when i met Clare (i know it sounds corny).I was in a relationship that had no love in it and the only reason i was still with her was because we had a young son.
I met Clare one evening out on the town and the day after i felt in me that i had met someone who i would be with for the rest of my fell in love after only a few weeks and the rest is history.
Right everyone you can stop being sick now :lol: :lol:
I met Clare one evening out on the town and the day after i felt in me that i had met someone who i would be with for the rest of my fell in love after only a few weeks and the rest is history.
Right everyone you can stop being sick now
:lol: :lol: 
Sex God
Wow, Clare - what have you done here? These are truly beautiful moments - where people can recount what did it for them.
I don't think I've anything to offer (too much of a planner me) but it may be I haven't got the guts that some of the others have - will give it some thought.
Cali - come here followed by a 
I don't think I've anything to offer (too much of a planner me) but it may be I haven't got the guts that some of the others have - will give it some thought.
Cali - come here
followed by a 
Sex God
I would echo Tune's comment that this is a damn good thread. On a personal note, I have no particular moment to add and I guess that makes me a very lucky person. There has never been a defining or life changing moment that has really put the brakes on and made me think that things need to change although I will say that as I get older, I am reflecting on things a bit more.
Its only been in recent years as I attend more funerals than birthdays, that the realisation of how short life is has hit home a bit more and that how the chase for the things that I once listed as being important(mostly materialistic), really is a fools errand.
Wether or not I have the balls to kick it into touch will be another story and perhaps, that one moment, that some of you have already had.
Its only been in recent years as I attend more funerals than birthdays, that the realisation of how short life is has hit home a bit more and that how the chase for the things that I once listed as being important(mostly materialistic), really is a fools errand.
Wether or not I have the balls to kick it into touch will be another story and perhaps, that one moment, that some of you have already had.
You be Frank and I'll be Earnest !!! 
:? :? :?
Another sad one I'm afraid!!!
When my first daughter was born my then wife had post-natal depression. I was in the army but some how managed to look after the baby almost single handed. I would nip home in my tea break to feed her, again at lunch time then look after her from the moment I finished work until I went back to work in the morning (Including all the night feeds etc.)
After six weeks of this I was physically and mentally exhausted. The baby slept in a moses basket at the end of our bed and I was convinced that our movement (and the wife's snoring!!) was keeping her awake so I decided to try putting her into the nursery, next door to our bedroom, for the first time.
That night I had the best nights sleep since she was born and woke up at 6 o'clock so proud that my daughter had slept through the night for the first time.
I went into the nursery and stood there looking at her for a few minutes, but soon realised something was wrong. She wasn't breathing. She had died in her sleep that night.
This was 19 years ago now and obviously had a big impact on me, but the reason I am telling you about this is because of the way it changed my life. I used to lie in bed worrying about silly little things but now I don't. I think the worst thing that can happen to anyone is one of their children dying, so when that happened it put everything else into perspective. So what if a bill isn't paid on time or there's some big meeting coming up at work. I am now much more laid back and don't worry about anything (well hardly anything!!)
I was trying to think of something funny to end with but I can't think of anything - but I'm not worried about it!!!
:? :? :? Another sad one I'm afraid!!!
When my first daughter was born my then wife had post-natal depression. I was in the army but some how managed to look after the baby almost single handed. I would nip home in my tea break to feed her, again at lunch time then look after her from the moment I finished work until I went back to work in the morning (Including all the night feeds etc.)
After six weeks of this I was physically and mentally exhausted. The baby slept in a moses basket at the end of our bed and I was convinced that our movement (and the wife's snoring!!) was keeping her awake so I decided to try putting her into the nursery, next door to our bedroom, for the first time.
That night I had the best nights sleep since she was born and woke up at 6 o'clock so proud that my daughter had slept through the night for the first time.
I went into the nursery and stood there looking at her for a few minutes, but soon realised something was wrong. She wasn't breathing. She had died in her sleep that night.
This was 19 years ago now and obviously had a big impact on me, but the reason I am telling you about this is because of the way it changed my life. I used to lie in bed worrying about silly little things but now I don't. I think the worst thing that can happen to anyone is one of their children dying, so when that happened it put everything else into perspective. So what if a bill isn't paid on time or there's some big meeting coming up at work. I am now much more laid back and don't worry about anything (well hardly anything!!)
I was trying to think of something funny to end with but I can't think of anything - but I'm not worried about it!!!
Quote by Sgt Bilko
You be Frank and I'll be Earnest !!!
Another sad one I'm afraid!!!
When my first daughter was born my then wife had post-natal depression. I was in the army but some how managed to look after the baby almost single handed. I would nip home in my tea break to feed her, again at lunch time then look after her from the moment I finished work until I went back to work in the morning (Including all the night feeds etc.)
After six weeks of this I was physically and mentally exhausted. The baby slept in a moses basket at the end of our bed and I was convinced that our movement (and the wife's snoring!!) was keeping her awake so I decided to try putting her into the nursery, next door to our bedroom, for the first time.
That night I had the best nights sleep since she was born and woke up at 6 o'clock so proud that my daughter had slept through the night for the first time.
I went into the nursery and stood there looking at her for a few minutes, but soon realised something was wrong. She wasn't breathing. She had died in her sleep that night.
This was 19 years ago now and obviously had a big impact on me, but the reason I am telling you about this is because of the way it changed my life. I used to lie in bed worrying about silly little things but now I don't. I think the worst thing that can happen to anyone is one of their children dying, so when that happened it put everything else into perspective. So what if a bill isn't paid on time or there's some big meeting coming up at work. I am now much more laid back and don't worry about anything (well hardly anything!!)
I was trying to think of something funny to end with but I can't think of anything - but I'm not worried about it!!!
Sarge :therethere: :therethere: :therethere:
For the second time in this thread im in tears.
Im completely astounded by what you guys have been through and i count myself extremely lucky.
I think your all incredibly brave to be able to post such touching events in public and never realised that i would provoke a reaction such as i have.
