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Now I know I'm supposed to try and get to know you all - and I've had really good responses to messages I've posted here - but I've just been in the chatroom and said hi to everyone but made a slight mistake by suggesting a cam room to someone who was asking where one was - I then got a snippy response from someone telling me off and that was my only reply - is the chatroom always like that or did I choose a bad moment?
well this site does not have a cam room.. so you must have been sugesting the cam room on another site.
oddly enough advertising or sugesting that people leave this site to go to another one is frowned on by the ops in the chatroom! confused
so i would hazard a guess that you would have had the same response at any time.
x
I agree about being frowned upon about encouraging people to leave - but it was a reply to a direct question about where the people could find a site that used cams - hence I thought I was being friendly and helpful so the negative reply was a bit of a surprise - the chat rooms quite an intimidating place for a first timer so maybe I need to thicken my skin a bit or hope people like you are there to guide me gently!
maybe you would have been better asking the persons permision to pm them. you could then have given them the addy in private.
i dont go in the chatroom often but trust me.. the ops are nice.. they dont bite... except intimately!
wink
hope u have fun
x
Section of chat room log :-
HappyHappyCpl : Jon::do you know any cam romms?
sgmab : happyhappycpl - try
@Jon : we do not give out other urls in this chat room
That will have been my response to a direct question to ME then...........
Quote by spinach
the chat rooms quite an intimidating place for a first timer so maybe I need to thicken my skin a bit

Or read the rules......................... http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/chatroom/user-rules.html - y'know, from that big link on the chatroom page..........
Thanks for proving my point - it was my first time in the chatroom; I make a slight mistake and you take the piss - so I made a mistake - I'm only fucking human
Which is why it is always prudent to read the rules before entering a chat room Spinach.... And seeing as it gives you the option to do just that before you enter, I personally can see no reason for anyone not to know them..
The chat room OP's have a very difficult job and as you said yourself it is very busy in there, try to appreciate that they sometimes get rather tired of hearing the old adage "I didn't know the rules"...
Oh and before you have a go at me too, I was once a chat room OP and know exactly what Jon is on about..
Shireen
what i object to was the speed at which I was criticised by someone who ignored all my previous pleasantries and then replies in an offensively arrogant way - the chatroom op's may have a difficult job but those people who are told time and time again to make an effort to get themselves known and then face this kind of backlash are, in my opinion, having an even harder one.
You miss the entire point - my response was to the person who asked me the damn question ffs!
Now - would you like me to pass you a ladder......................so you can climb down off your high horse...................
Ummmm... feel free to jump on me for saying this, but you aren't doing yourself any favours by belittling the mods in public so it might be an idea to just drop it.
What you dont see is the behind the scenes work that the chat room OP's are doing, so many a time they often miss people joining... Please also remember that they are watching the room far more closely than yourself and therefore more often than not have tired eyes...
It is not possible for the OP's to become a babysitter to all newbies in the chat room it's not like the forum... It's real time and therefore does not allow for the sort of pleasantries that are afforded in the forum.
Like I said before all people joining the chat room are given the option to read the rules first, in any society it is wise to research the "local customs" before stepping through the door...
Shireen
We've been coming on here for almost a year now off and on. And while we have never personally been chastised by the chat room ops I understand peoples frustration at being jumped upon by the OPs the minute they misunderstand a thread of conversation in the chatroom. Sometime its simply a newcomers way of getting into a conversation.
It's unrealistic to expect everyone to read the rules before entering the chatroom. And I (m) really cannot be done with all the back slapping that goes along with being an OP. If they find it is a hard job then stop doing it. No one is forcing anyone to be an op. Get off the soap box and give some of the new comers a break.
And yes I understand that without the OPs chaos may reign. But some of the best times I have had in the chatroom are when OPs are not present.
Sorry but I dont believe it is unrealistic to expect people to read the rules..
Thats why they are there...
The rules are in place in an attempt to make the chatroom a happier ploace to be.
Some people choose not to read them because they are intent on disregarding them anyway..
Others because they cant be bothered....
Either way when you have the option to read them you haven't a leg to stand on when you are picked up for transgressing them..
Quote by ScotsCpl
It's unrealistic to expect everyone to read the rules before entering the chatroom.

Why is it unrealistic? If you joined a club or such, you would be given a set of rules and expected to abide by them.
If you did not, you would be ejected. Simple as that.
Rules are there to keep order and everyone happy. If someone doesn't like it they are free to leave rolleyes
Tracy-Jayne
Life shouldn't revolve around rules and regulations. If as I'm sure is the case some folk stumble upon this site while surfing the net. Think to themselves I'll pop in there for a wee chin wag, have a bit of a gas with someone, then whats the problem with that. Sure in an ideal world they would have the rules downloaded to their brain the minute they hit the site, but life ain't perfect and people don't always understand the etiquette of sites they are visiting.
I'm desperately hoping I don't get into trouble for this, or shat on from the hights of a soap box, but in a year of visiting this site I have never read the rules.
And I have joined clubs without reading the rules in the past, both on line and for example my local golf club. On the whole I have found members more than willing to take the time to explain the rules when I ask about them. When I don't ask and get things wrong they have all been kind enough to politely and with respect tell me about the rules.
What they don't do is go running to the nearest OP or equivalent and say they have PM'd me without asking. And before the usual suspects bemoan the fact they are PM'd without permission, could I suggest it would be a lot more fuss to press the ignore button rather than letting everyone in the chatroom know how popular you are with the newcomers. Some folks fingers must be red raw, just click ignore, its a lot less bover.
Quote by ScotsCpl
We've been coming on here for almost a year now off and on. And while we have never personally been chastised by the chat room ops I understand peoples frustration at being jumped upon by the OPs the minute they misunderstand a thread of conversation in the chatroom. Sometime its simply a newcomers way of getting into a conversation.
It's unrealistic to expect everyone to read the rules before entering the chatroom. And I (m) really cannot be done with all the back slapping that goes along with being an OP. If they find it is a hard job then stop doing it. No one is forcing anyone to be an op. Get off the soap box and give some of the new comers a break.
And yes I understand that without the OPs chaos may reign. But some of the best times I have had in the chatroom are when OPs are not present.

ahem!
i think you might find some people no longer op the chatroom because it is a thankless task, which can rapidly see friendships ((( which aren't about backslapping or opping kudos at all! ))) and attitudes to you change. opping can remove all pleasure from the room precisely because of the crap you get for trying to make the room usable for others who have read the rules, and abide by them. ops can't always read every single line and follow convos that closely. they can only warn for infringements they spot as and when they happen. a swift kick and a reminder to read the rules doesn't strike me as harsh or unwarranted IMHO?
neil x x x ;)
As I said.............Some folk just wanna disregard the rules and some folk just cant be arsed..
Receiving a pm when using java to chat transfers the curser to the new window without the knowledge of the person typing.....Which could lead to personal information being sent to somebody who is not entitled to that info..
How would you feel if you were giving somebody your email addy or phone number and it was sent to a third party because someone who couldnt be arsed to read the rules had pm'd you???
Ignore button wont be any good to you then will it??
Quote by ScotsCpl
What they don't do is go running to the nearest OP or equivalent and say they have PM'd me without asking. And before the usual suspects bemoan the fact they are PM'd without permission, could I suggest it would be a lot more fuss to press the ignore button rather than letting everyone in the chatroom know how popular you are with the newcomers. Some folks fingers must be red raw, just click ignore, its a lot less bover.

The reason we have rules against sending people unsolicited private messages is quite simple. The majority of our chatroom users use the Java interface (which is linked to from the main site). If one of these users is already in a private conversation with someone and you decide to open a new private window without asking then their cursor automatically jumps into your private window. They may not realise that this has happened and could quite easily send you the message intended for the person they were talking to by mistake.
"So what?" you say. That message could quite easily contain personal information that wasn't meant for you. It could quite be a telephone number, an address or a meeting place that they had absolutely no intention of sending to you at all. Clicking the "ignore" button afterwards isn't going to change the fact that you hijacked that information and you had no right to receive it.
It's against the rules!!!!!
Steve
i think you might find some people no longer op the chatroom because it is a thankless task, which can rapidly see friendships ((( which aren't about backslapping or opping kudos at all! ))) and attitudes to you change.

I agree 100%, its a thankless task, but lets not get sentimetal about it. It's like asking someone to feel sorry for a politician.
How would you feel if you were giving somebody your email addy or phone number and it was sent to a third party because someone who couldnt be arsed to read the rules had pm'd you???

I wouldn't be so dumb!
Being dumb doesn't come into the equation. The chatroom ops are there to make sure that the room is 'safe' for everyone to use. That's why we have rules. Ignore them if you want but your stay in the room will be very short lived if you do.
Steve
Can you just let me know what name you use in the chatroom please scots so my first bit of typing can be
/ignore(yournamehere)
Just to avoid me being a dumb ass and passing you any info you understand
Being dumb doesn't come into the equation. The chatroom ops are there to make sure that the room is 'safe' for everyone to use. That's why we have rules. Ignore them if you want but your stay in the room will be very short lived if you do.

Sorry. Really sorry. I understand there are reasons for OPs and I do understand they do a very good job. I really have nothing but admiration for the OPs, it's not a job I would volunteer to do.
Messed up in what I was trying to say is that, yes in the chatroom OPs are a necessity., But, what is uncalled for is when newcomers post something on this forum, they then have a barrage of sanctamonious claptrap from people who should know better. We have all been there. We have all been new, and we should all be as welcoming as possible, even when the newcomers have got it wrong. Especially if they are brave enough to post their misgivings on the forum
Newcomers to the site in my truely humble opinion worship don't have a valid point to moan about the chatroom when they haven't bothered to read the rules(despite my earlier statement, I probablyu jusy got lucky.....read the rules). On the other hand if they do post a query on the forum, more wisely members of this site have an obligation not to chastise them but to encourage them.
I ain't getting involved anymore. And apologies in advance for those I might still be rubbing up the wrong way. Although feel free to PM me and maybe we can discuss ways I and my beloved can rub you up the right way lol :lol: :lol:
Well as a former op,
Ops are there for a reason, not santamonious claptrap as sertain chatters would like to call it
tell ya what love, you try doing it for a day, see how you get on, see how pissed off youg get with the arsehole single guys who say they cant read the rules, they can read enough to get in, so they should go read the rules too......... or can they only read in brail or morse code, or even by hyrogliphics, seeing as they ONLY look at pics on an add, dont bother to read what it says
and as for spinach moaning cuz he was asked not to post a url or ask for cam chat rooms
GET A LIFE ya sadsac
You need a more specialized kink website, not a fricking swingers one mad
TAKHISIS
I've a feeling this thread might be locked soon 'cos it's verging on personal attacks - oh! another rule! - so I'm getting my bit in now before that happens!
i love the chatroom. I started using it before I joined the Forum and I've had loads of fun chatting to newbies and regulars alike.
Instead of just jumping in, I typed a simple hello and sat back to watch the room. Patience is a virtue. Ignoring the rules, asking 'asl', PM-ing without asking, being offensive to other users, trolling and talking about other sites are all things which annoy different people to a more or lesser extent.
Yes, of course we shouldn't have to live our lives by rules and regulations but we do. It's the way it is the world over. It's called civilisation.
Newcomers ARE made very welcome in the chatroom - just like on here, they say hello and we say hello back. What more do you want, bloody cartwheels???
The ops are busy people and without them there wouldn't be a chatroom - or at least not one many would want to use.
Honest to God - bottom line - if you don't like it, don't go in. rolleyes