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Confessions......

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Ok, being an avid reader of Cosmo and all other magazines, i thought i would transfer some of the fun to here. not sure if it will take off, but its worth a try!!
i'd like to dedicate this thread to your confessions, :shock: embarrasing moments, redface and those naughty, rude or funny little things that YOU may have done but not told anyone, OR something you MAY have told people but want to share again so you can cheer us all up after a hard day at work!! :twisted:
So go on, tell all and be unburdened!!!!!!!
When I was a lot younger I had sex with my girlfriend in the spare room with the baby monitor on... It was as bad as you can imagine. The whole family was around for dinner...
Oh joy... Wonder where she is now....
DAH69
some years ago i went out with a lady who said to me " thank god you are not as big as my ex husband "
belive it or not i since found out years later that she is a celebs mum :shock: :shock:
will never forget it
The first one that springs to mind is of me falling asleep, naked, head on knees, pissed as a fart on my then gf's parents' upstairs toilet. redface
I was woken by her asking if I was still okay to finish what we had started downstairs.
Yes I was and yes we did. wink
It couldn't have been too bad - she became Mrs Dambuster MkII (nobody saw that, did they???
That one always come to mind first. Maybe others will pop into my head. And maybe I'll share them with you. :twisted:
(Marvellous idea for a thread)
Oh my God, I'm too boring. I have nothing to confess! :-( :-( :cry: :-(
sorry.. i cant tell you.. or i would have to kill you1
i am saving all my "moments" for my book! lol
lol
Aw, WBB hun, go on, tell us SOMETHING!! please???
ok.. just for lou...... rolleyes
i was on the bus once on my way home froma weekend meet and so had a biggish bag with me.... when i put the bag down it must have knocked one of my toys and a loudish buzzing noise started. :shock:
everyone was looking round.. but i knew that to turn it off i would have had to open my bag and pull stuff out to find the toy... so everyone would have known that it was me!
i just left it.. hoping the batteries would soon run out - the didnt!! confused
it must have been obvious it was me though.. as when it was my stop.. i had to walk down the aisle of the buss carrying the bag! redface
that was QUITE embarrasing!
when i was 9 i peed myself in class at school!
but probably the most embarrasing moment was when i first had my coil put in.. it made my periods go really funny before it stopped them completley.
i went out with a guy i had seen a few times and we ended up going back to his place for a bit of fun.
i had no idea i had "come on" and so was more than happy to let him have a play around.
it was not untill i went to the bathroom (where the light was on) that i noticed all the mess.
i couldnt face going into the room and putting the light on to see what mess had been made of his bed and him..and having to tell him what had happened, so i started crying and told him he had "injured me" and i was going home!
i have actually seen him since,.,and he felt really guilty that he had done something to me! surprisedops:
Quote by well_busty_babe
when i was 9 i peed myself in class at school!

When I was even younger than nine; I once pooped in my pants on the way to or on the way home from school.
My brother snitched on me to Mum. So the next day she took gave me my daily penny (remember the big ones) took it back from me and gave it to him!!!
I hated him for ages for that mad
I once stole a pint of milk from a pub doorstep :shock:
but probably the most embarrasing moment was when i first had my coil put in.. it made my periods go really funny before it stopped them completley.
i went out with a guy i had seen a few times and we ended up going back to his place for a bit of fun.
i had no idea i had "come on" and so was more than happy to let him have a play around.
it was not untill i went to the bathroom (where the light was on) that i noticed all the mess.
i couldnt face going into the room and putting the light on to see what mess had been made of his bed and him..and having to tell him what had happened, so i started crying and told him he had "injured me" and i was going home!
i have actually seen him since,.,and he felt really guilty that he had done something to me! redface

Busty that was brilliant! lol :lol: :lol:
I went to Brighton and bought my first vibe when I hit 18. Out of curiousity I upacked it in the train station loos, in a locked cubicle. I switched it on.................and it made such a loud buzzing noise, and vibrated so much, I dropped it in alarm, and it rolled out into the wash area..........................where I had to go out and retrieve it in front of EVERYONE :shock: surprisedops: :shock: :oops: :o
Venusxxx
WBB and VenusnMars have just reminded me of my daughter asking as a toddler why Mum had a "funny torch" at the side of her bed redface
And of my boy asking if Mum was okay on one particular noisey/active night.
Bless him, he didn't want to come into the bedroom in case we were having an 'argue'
God, I miss my kids. And the innocence they had.
Ok well this is a non sexual one but very embarassing all the same!
I was at a school fete when i was about 7 and I'd lost my mum. I was crying my little heart out and was looking round for her everywhere.
I suddenly spotted her and ran up to her (accidentally) pushing her over onto one of the tables which then promptly collapsed - along with my mum on it!
The whole crowd turned and stared at the sight - then I realised it wasn't even my mum! Just someone with the same hair do......... oh the shame! redface

biggrin
ooooo i have so many but i guess the one ill never ever live down was
i got on this ride at blackpool funfair and it was like a waltzer but a big dipper combined anyhows
i was terrified and held on to the seating with all my might and screamed
my friend kept laughing and trying to nudge me
but i would nt open my eyes
to cut a long story short
at the end of the ride i opened my eyes and saw the poor lad sitting next to me clutching his goolies
i hadnt had the seat .....but was hanging on to his crutch ....oppss
he got carted off to first aid redface
Many many years ago, in my early 20s, my girlfriend and I were shagging in the dunes at Studland, and really getting into it hump . Suddenly she stopped moving underneath me, went all tense and I noticed her wide eyes as she looked over my shoulder. :shock: I looked round and saw 3 naked, middle-aged blokes standing there wanking. My hardon turned into a shrivelled up little sausage in record time.
We were both abolutely mortified and covered ourselves up.... And then I got angry and the guys ran off.
It was another 20 years before I learned about dogging lol. And I often wonder could I carry on if it happened now????
Wow, these are so good!! i wasnt expecting such a good response!! Keep them coming, we might even be able to comission an SH Confessions book!!! :shock: lol
I split with my daughter's daddy when she was about 6 months old. A few years later and dating fella who is now hubby .... we were invited to a friends Engagement party. Her fella's brother looked just like my ex and my daughter thought it was her real Daddy and kept going up to him and holding his hand saying Dada etc. He and especially not his wife didn't have a sense of humour and just didn't see the funny side of it.
We tried to explain that this bloke looked just like my daughter's daddy, but they simply looked at my new beau and didn't believe me!
My friend told us later that they are an odd couple and a few years earlier he'd gone off and had numerous affairs and the wife thought I was one of them redface
Luckily my friend and her other half knew my ex and could verify our story!
Well, a few months ago, DB and I had a couple of friends round to the house. We decided to watch a video and I asked the lady of the couple to put the vid in to the machine. To my horror, there was a vid already in the machine that I would rather not have been seen! I went bright red and did not know where to put my face! Needless to say it has never been mentioned again redface
I have to say though that I don't really care what people think of me when I am in my own home anymore - they take me as they find me lol
Many years ago when I was in my teens I was invited to a birthday party being held in a large B&B, which was owned by the parents of the birthday boy. There were loads of guests and we were all staying for the night.
After far too many bottles of Woodpecker, boyfriend and I decided to go upstairs . . . .
Halfway through me giving him a BJ, birthday boys mother walk into the room to get some bedding from the large cupboard in the corner of the room.
She glanced across at us, carried on to the cupboard, got out the stuff and walked out smiling without saying a word as we carried on regardless cool
The following morning I just could not look that woman in the eye at breakfast - especially as she told everyone I would be having two sausages - as she knew they were my favourite :shock:
She sat and watched me eating with a smirk on her face as I tried to chew my food.
She asked "Are you having trouble swallowing? You seemed ok last night" redface surprisedops: :oops:
Needless to say, I never got invited there again lol
Tracy-Jayne
Just thought of another one...
I was at a party once and slept over...Well, fell into a drunken coma more like...
Anyway, i woke up at about 5am with bodies strewn everywhere, it was like a roman orgy... I needed a wee. Never been in this house before either by the way...
i found my way upstairs and into the bathroom, still pissed at this stage remember, but couldn't seem to locate the toilet. In my drunken state I decided the bath (Which met my knees with a bang) was the best bet.
About 3/4 of the way through there was some moaning coming from below me... Yep, some poor F***er had chosen the bath for his place of rest...
It was not a pretty scene...
DAH69
This will date me.......
Many moons ago when I was in my teens (for some now inexplicable reason) I was a Mod and had the obligatory Lambretta scooter.
The local Mod crowd was having a fancy dress party for Christmas and I was dared to go as a fairy!
Never been one to back down from a dare I obliged... dressed in a Ballerinas dress, blonde ringlet wig, glitter, sparkly tights, makeup, wand etc… I set off across town on my scooter (no crash helmets in those days) only to break down on route....
The long and the short of it is... the police car that stopped pissed himself and said as a fairy I should be able to wave my wand and fix it myself.... I couldn’t and had to walk 3 miles home through a crowded town pushing a scooter in full fairy drag!!!
Was about 10 years till the jokes eventually stopped!!!
redface
We covered this a while ago so I thought I would recycle my post from then:
When I was a young Private Bilko I was sort of seeing a girl that lived up the road from me. I was 18 and she was 16. Her parents wouldn’t let her go to the pub so being the gent that I was I used to go out and get bladdered then go round to her house on the way home for lots of sex. We would wait for her parents to go to bed then start humping away on the sofa. wink
One night, after a particularly heavy drinking session I popped round on my way home and went through the usual routine of waiting for her mum and dad to go to bed before indulging ourselves on the sofa once again.
I would normally walk home once the deed was done but on this occasion I must have fallen asleep. My girlfriend covered me with a blanket and went to bed.
Next morning I awoke bright and early and lay there with my eyes closed, thinking about the session we had enjoyed on that same sofa some six hours earlier, This aroused me again, and my willy began to respond so I assisted by giving it a few strokes of encouragement.
At his point I realised that the blanket must have fallen off me during the night so I opened my eyes and then the full horror of what was happening smacked me in the face :shock: :shock: …………………………………………………………Her mum and dad were sat drinking tea in the chairs next to the fireplace about two feet away from me, staring open-mouthed in my direction as I lay there naked, on my back, playing with my erection!!!!
redface surprisedops: :oops: :oops: lol :lol:
I wanted to die and couldn’t get out of there fast enough.:
confused :? :? :wink:
I'd just like to say... Nice one Sgt Bilko...
Bloody hell.... :shock:
DAH69
awwwww bless. wonder what the parents thought when they saw sargent bilkos little soldier stood to attention?
lol :lol:
When i first met Steve he lived with his brother and his brothers girlfriend.
One afternoon,i skived off college and went to see him feeling a bit naughty,as we had the house to ourselves we got a bit carried away and got down to it on the sofa,when to our horror the girlfriend walked in redface surprisedops:
In the good old days i was really shy and was never so embarrassed,and of course she didnt shut up about it for ages.
Another time that comes to mind was when i was at school,not sexual but still embarrasing.
I used to have really weak ankles and would go over on them at any time,
One day between classes when everyones moving on to their next classroom my ankle decided to go on me on the bloody stairs,i fell down the stairs and landed on top of a lad at the bottom.
The only problem was that he was with one of his mates who i fancied like mad,so i got up dusted myself off,and hobbled off :oops: :oops: :oops:
Clare,xxx
wink
Quote by well_busty_babe
awwwww bless. wonder what the parents thought when they saw sargent bilkos little soldier stood to attention?
lol :lol:

Dipped it in a boiled egg ? :shock:
Paul