From the AUP:
'Abusive or aggressive behaviour towards fellow members, Ops/Mods or Administration staff.'
What constitutes abusive or aggressive behaviour?
I'd say it's being nasty or threatening. What do you think?
Sex God
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Define this?
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Sex God
Quote by Sassy-Seren
I'd say it was anything said that's likely to deliberately cause offence to another member.
Good point raised Frecs :thumbup:
Well, if you said something that you knew would offend a particular person, yes. But some people get offended at the most innocuous things, don't they?
Quote by Freckledbird
I'd say it was anything said that's likely to deliberately cause offence to another member.
Good point raised Frecs :thumbup:
Well, if you said something that you knew would offend a particular person, yes. But some people get offended at the most innocuous things, don't they?
Being offended is something the person on the receiving end decides. According to the policies in my employment and my opinion too. So yes, the actual 'offence' can vary from person to person.
Master of Sex
In employment law there is a difference between abusive/aggresive and offensive. Different people are offended by different things, but abuse and aggression are pretty universal.
Even on a permissive site like this (or should that be especially on a site like this?) all members should be careful about giving offence. But nasty, hurtful, aggressive etc behaviour is NEVER acceptable.
Even on a permissive site like this (or should that be especially on a site like this?) all members should be careful about giving offence. But nasty, hurtful, aggressive etc behaviour is NEVER acceptable.
Sex God
Quote by Freckledbird
I'd say it was anything said that's likely to deliberately cause offence to another member.
Good point raised Frecs :thumbup:
Well, if you said something that you knew would offend a particular person, yes. But some people get offended at the most innocuous things, don't they?
Very good point Frex. Some people don't like the truth, even if presented in perfectly polite and neutral language. Is their supposed taking of offence in such a situation valid?
And then there are what duncanlondon once referred to as "various grumblers and professional complainers" in here.
Interesting one this, as we are on a site that is used by a large and varied cross section of the populous.
Its a bit of a minefield the old "what constitutes threatening or abusive behaviour" debate precisely because of the issue that has already been raised on the topic, that different people have different levels of what they constitute as such!
I myself am pretty thick skinned, I like a bit of rib taking and banter and would say that I can take stick as well as give it out, I am cautious on the site (more so on the Forum) as to what I will say as I do worry that people will take my somewhat "out there" sense of humour to be something more sinister.
The people I usually banter with or comment on are people that I know, (as so much as you can know somebody on an internet site) so I feel they know my style and that I am a bit of a "piss taker" for want of a more colloquial term.
To deliberately make a statement to make somebody in particular feel bad or use some of the big social no no's such as racism, sexual orientation and sexism (to an extent
) or threats of a violent nature are pretty much intolerable and inexcusable.
I have been known to on occasion call some homosexual members "poofs" and "bum bandits"(tho I know them personally) and they have responded by calling me an "anally retentive pompus twat" but this bares no relevance to me thinking of them in a negative connotation, we are simply engaging in light-hearted extraction of urine.
Whilst on another occasion I used the word "stupid" in reference to another member (whom I didn't know personally) on the persons viewpoint in a Forum thread and was severely reprimanded by a Mod.
What I have realised during my time here is to be very cautious. Why? i hear you cry, because we have such a mixed and diverse bunch of people on the site that somewhere, sometime down the line you are going to make a flippant off the cuff remark that hurts somebody's feelings.
Some would say they are being over sensitive, some would say that I was being insensitive, each of us has our own levels of tolerance and judgments on matters that can vary greatly depending on whether or not we know the person.
Anyway enough rambling, good post I will keep my beady, judgmental eye on it!!
Its a bit of a minefield the old "what constitutes threatening or abusive behaviour" debate precisely because of the issue that has already been raised on the topic, that different people have different levels of what they constitute as such!
I myself am pretty thick skinned, I like a bit of rib taking and banter and would say that I can take stick as well as give it out, I am cautious on the site (more so on the Forum) as to what I will say as I do worry that people will take my somewhat "out there" sense of humour to be something more sinister.
The people I usually banter with or comment on are people that I know, (as so much as you can know somebody on an internet site) so I feel they know my style and that I am a bit of a "piss taker" for want of a more colloquial term.
To deliberately make a statement to make somebody in particular feel bad or use some of the big social no no's such as racism, sexual orientation and sexism (to an extent
) or threats of a violent nature are pretty much intolerable and inexcusable.I have been known to on occasion call some homosexual members "poofs" and "bum bandits"(tho I know them personally) and they have responded by calling me an "anally retentive pompus twat" but this bares no relevance to me thinking of them in a negative connotation, we are simply engaging in light-hearted extraction of urine.
Whilst on another occasion I used the word "stupid" in reference to another member (whom I didn't know personally) on the persons viewpoint in a Forum thread and was severely reprimanded by a Mod.
What I have realised during my time here is to be very cautious. Why? i hear you cry, because we have such a mixed and diverse bunch of people on the site that somewhere, sometime down the line you are going to make a flippant off the cuff remark that hurts somebody's feelings.
Some would say they are being over sensitive, some would say that I was being insensitive, each of us has our own levels of tolerance and judgments on matters that can vary greatly depending on whether or not we know the person.
Anyway enough rambling, good post I will keep my beady, judgmental eye on it!!
i suppose being aggressive could be following someone around room to room after they have told you no etc.
Some people who constantly whisper when asked not too could be viewed as bullying and unwanted.
Comments about a person made infront of others is bullying whether meant as a joke or dont know how that person takes the posted comment from behind the screen.
My experience of the chatrooms has been to witness plenty of unwanted remarks when its seen the majority of the members in the room stand up and say something which is good.
If anyone did continue aggressive or unwanted behavior to a members mailbox im sure the people here would deal with why you never give out personal email or phone number until sure.
A lot of what Srne says is who know each other know the limits.
Some people who constantly whisper when asked not too could be viewed as bullying and unwanted.
Comments about a person made infront of others is bullying whether meant as a joke or dont know how that person takes the posted comment from behind the screen.
My experience of the chatrooms has been to witness plenty of unwanted remarks when its seen the majority of the members in the room stand up and say something which is good.
If anyone did continue aggressive or unwanted behavior to a members mailbox im sure the people here would deal with why you never give out personal email or phone number until sure.
A lot of what Srne says is who know each other know the limits.
I agree with all the points raised so far. To deliberately and KNOWINGLY say something to offend a particular member or group of members, or to cause hurt to them is a breach of AUP in my opinion.
for example, if I came on and posted that I had taken up belly dancing :shock: and was loving it, and member (whom I didnt know well or know at all) posted something like, "well you certainly have enough bellies to dance with", or "well I think that you are a sad cow who should get a life" or" well personally I think anyone who likes belly dancing is being f@cking unpatriotic and should learn a British pastime instead"
Then that is, I would say
'Abusive or aggressive behaviour towards fellow members, Ops/Mods or Administration staff.' as they are being deliberatly nasty towards me
If someone who came on and posted, "well I dont really care much for belly dancing, its not my thing, all that flesh wobbling about" they are expressing an opinion, in a nice way, and not making a personal attack on me.. ....I may get offended by the remark, but it was not deliberately written to offend me, so would not breach the rules.
Some people get offended easily, even by the most well intentioned of remarks (guilty as charged and to that person to whom I took offence I apologise unreservedly for doing so
), but I think thats life in general.
for example, if I came on and posted that I had taken up belly dancing :shock: and was loving it, and member (whom I didnt know well or know at all) posted something like, "well you certainly have enough bellies to dance with", or "well I think that you are a sad cow who should get a life" or" well personally I think anyone who likes belly dancing is being f@cking unpatriotic and should learn a British pastime instead"
Then that is, I would say
'Abusive or aggressive behaviour towards fellow members, Ops/Mods or Administration staff.' as they are being deliberatly nasty towards me
If someone who came on and posted, "well I dont really care much for belly dancing, its not my thing, all that flesh wobbling about" they are expressing an opinion, in a nice way, and not making a personal attack on me.. ....I may get offended by the remark, but it was not deliberately written to offend me, so would not breach the rules.
Some people get offended easily, even by the most well intentioned of remarks (guilty as charged and to that person to whom I took offence I apologise unreservedly for doing so
), but I think thats life in general. Quote by MikeNorth
I'd say it was anything said that's likely to deliberately cause offence to another member.
Good point raised Frecs :thumbup:
Well, if you said something that you knew would offend a particular person, yes. But some people get offended at the most innocuous things, don't they?
Very good point Frex. Some people don't like the truth, even if presented in perfectly polite and neutral language. Is their supposed taking of offence in such a situation valid?
And then there are what duncanlondon once referred to as "various grumblers and professional complainers" in here.
There are also the experienced members who are quite cunning at winding up vulnerable newbies and gormless tourists. From which ensues a set of abusively constructed arguments. All seemingly coming from the hapless victim, who find themselves in a defensive position and lashing out with all they can.
But there's always 2 sides to the argument. And leading on and winding up is as offensive as falling for it.
Sex God
Quote by thevillians
In employment law there is a difference between abusive/aggresive and offensive. Different people are offended by different things, but abuse and aggression are pretty universal.
Even on a permissive site like this (or should that be especially on a site like this?) all members should be careful about giving offence. But nasty, hurtful, aggressive etc behaviour is NEVER acceptable.
so where does threatening to beat someones bum with a wooden spoon come into it???
look at the times we all been bantering away in the chatroom n some newbie thought we all were meaning it....
it`s difficult ... would never upset anyone on purpose....but it happens so easy by accident....
Sex God
:shock: blimey ................ just as well no one takes me seriously then innit 
