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Eyup love, fancy a shag............?

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And when I picked myself up from the floor, I thought that maybe, just maybe, my hitting on a girl technique needed a little fine tuning.
If c@rlsberg did chat up lines, it wouldn't be that one.
:laughabove:
Bell :mrgreen:
Last time we were out on a vanilla night a guy offered Mrs Tweeky a cigarette. On lighting it he said "Fuck later?". Slightly undervalued there I feel, at least two cigarettes lol Oh, and no we did not :lol:
I once had "I'm desperate for a shag, how are you fixed?"
I was polite in my refusal, my ego took a right kick in the bollocks.
Quote by Kaznkev
i hope even if you are fixed you would use a condom! lol

It's my only unbreakable rule, everything else are guidelines.
<edited for grammar - I wasted my education>
Quote by essex34m
I once had "I'm desperate for a shag, how are you fixed?"
I was polite in my refusal, my ego took a right kick in the bollocks.

Sorry, but I thought you understood that was my one and only chat up line redface
I will try and be more to the point next time wink
Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
Sorry, but I thought you understood that was my one and only chat up line redface
I will try and be more to the point next time wink

Mrs NWC,
fancy a shag ?
flipa
surprisedops:
"I'll get my coat........"
At least it wasn't broad Yorkshite...
"Eeeeeeeeee, baa gum, tha's bit taaaaaaasty. Faaaaancy furrrrrrrtlin' me fuuuuuurrets laaaater lass? Tha haaaaas a reeet lovely snuggly slippaaaas t'wear n paaaaaape tha can smoke after t'fact, laaaaaak. Wass tha saaaaay?"
;)
lol LG. x
Quote by little gem
At least it wasn't broad Yorkshite...
"Eeeeeeeeee, baa gum, tha's bit taaaaaaasty. Faaaaancy furrrrrrrtlin' me fuuuuuurrets laaaater lass? Tha haaaaas a reeet lovely snuggly slippaaaas t'wear n paaaaaape tha can smoke after t'fact, laaaaaak. Wass tha saaaaay?"
;)
lol LG. x

Eeeeeh, tha's lookshoery, that. Get tha knickers off, then. Oh, and take tha cap off an' all. Leave tha socks on.
xxx
hmmmm dont know whether to be offended by above two comments :twisted:
we av class up in yorkshire dunt tha knows lol
Don't be too hard on Gem Trixie. She's from Lancashire tha knos, and still struggling to come to terms wi' t'fact that everything she were ever taught as a nipper about which side o' t'pennines were t'right side were wrong. ;)
Sappho, you had me scratching me 'ead there for a minute with the lookshoery thing. Thought it was some strange dialect I'd not yet come across. confused I had to say it out loud once or twice but the penny dropped in the end! lol
BTW, just for the avoidance of doubt I have never once used 'fancy furtling me ferrets love' as a chat up line. I'm not sure using a filthy, furry, smelly little beast as a euphemism for me nads would be much in the way of a winning strategy? dunno
N x x x ;)
Quote by neilinleeds
Don't be too hard on Gem Trixie. She's from Lancashire tha knos, and still struggling to come to terms wi' t'fact that everything she were ever taught as a nipper about which side o' t'pennines were t'right side were wrong. ;)
Sappho, you had me scratching me 'ead there for a minute with the lookshoery thing. Thought it was some strange dialect I'd not yet come across. confused I had to say it out loud once or twice but the penny dropped in the end! lol
BTW, just for the avoidance of doubt I have never once used 'fancy furtling me ferrets love' as a chat up line. I'm not sure using a filthy, furry, smelly little beast as a euphemism for me nads would be much in the way of a winning strategy? dunno
N x x x ;)

Eyup! I've never heard that one either... :lol: Mind you, I'm shacked up wi' a southern shandy pants n 'es never even seen a ferret let alone furtled one!
You remind me of a parking ticket!
You have fine written all over you
bolt
Apologies to both Trixie kiss and Neil :kiss: - absolutely no offence intended. I just had a Monty Python moment. They come upon me of a sudden.
And now for something completely different...
Sappho x
Well Sappho, I found it quite hilarious. Especially the bit where Nellie actually googled "lookshoery" to see what it meant!
:giggle:
Quote by neilinleeds
BTW, just for the avoidance of doubt I have never once used 'fancy furtling me ferrets love' as a chat up line. I'm not sure using a filthy, furry, smelly little beast as a euphemism for me nads would be much in the way of a winning strategy?

rotflmao You told me they wouldn't smell, and they do. They reek! ;) Now I'll leave you all to wonder whether I mean Neil's nads or ferrets! lol
Trixie, I know there is class in Yorkshite, but not in our house! :lol: Usually the posh-est we get in here is when he says excuse me after farting in the bath to try to replicate that jacuzzi feeling at home without the cost! Don't even ask him about wafting the smells around as if it was aromatherapy. confused
And I supposedly come from the 'wrong' side of the pennines, eh? ;)
:lol: kiss LG. x
its ok i was only jesting anyway, no offense taken, at the end of the day we all take the piss out of each others accents but i must say in all my years in yorkshire no ones ever asked me to fettle their ferret lol
There is always a first time! :rascal:
:giggle:
I might try it at the next munch / club meet / social we go to, see how it runs out as a genuine chat up line!
And while we're on about accents... Bury is pronounced Bury. It's not Berry - those are things you eat! rolleyes lol
Quote by little gem
Is that like 'clorthes' DG? ;) biggrin

:giggle: :giggle: :giggle:
Quote by Freckledbird
Is that like 'clorthes' DG? ;) biggrin

:giggle: :giggle: :giggle:
Hahahaha... you're hilarious!! rolleyes redface
Bastids!!! :giggle: