In what way would it have helped them?
I ask this genuinely as I really don't see how a list of links covering questions and concerns would make them feel as though they fitted in more.
Everyone is different and while I don't as an individual want to see the same topics repeated week after week I often think that there are new answers and opinions for the same question over a period of time.
I personally search the last two months and if it hasn't been covered in that peiod then I would post it and there will be fresh faces and fresh opinions/outlooks/advice to be offered.
Perhaps the real answer is longer term members should try and remember their concerns when they were new and not be so quick with the search button is your friend comments when a genuine question is asked or a concern raised.
Regarding the whingy posts - I can't get a shag, my ad isn't working etc. There have been advice sections around for a while for these people and they don't read them or they wouldn't come on the forum and post their whinge. Nothing will change that.
Jas
XXX
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Quote by Sassy-Seren
Perhaps the real answer is longer term members should try and remember their concerns when they were new and not be so quick with the search button is your friend comments when a genuine question is asked or a concern raised.
Jas
XXX
Exactly what I've been saying
totally agree and i beleive thats what sheddy was trying to deal with in his suggestion!
Quote by sexkittenhfx
Perhaps the real answer is longer term members should try and remember their concerns when they were new and not be so quick with the search button is your friend comments when a genuine question is asked or a concern raised.
Jas
XXX
Exactly what I've been saying
totally agree and i beleive thats what sheddy was trying to deal with in his suggestion!
I beleave I even mentioned the same point at one stage over on page one
Quote by Jas-Tim
But this is the bit I don't get
In what way would it have helped them?
I ask this genuinely as I really don't see how a list of links covering questions and concerns would make them feel as though they fitted in more.
Jas
XXX
in my opinion its not the reading of the links that will make them feel they fit in, its the fact that they could be referred to those links in a friendly way and feel comfortable to continue posting, rather than be shot down in flames by some regular posters. does that make sense?
Quote by sexkittenhfx
But this is the bit I don't get
In what way would it have helped them?
I ask this genuinely as I really don't see how a list of links covering questions and concerns would make them feel as though they fitted in more.
Jas
XXX
in my opinion its not the reading of the links that will make them feel they fit in, its the fact that they could be referred to those links in a friendly way rather than shot down in flames by some regular posters. does that make sense?
What she said
Links aren't friendly but helpfull advice or even knowing someone has took time to think about your question either by aranging a sticky of answering your post in a polite manner
is certainly what I'd class as welcoming :D
Quote by sheddy
What she said
Links aren't friendly but helpfull advice or even knowing someone has took time to think about your question either by aranging a sticky of answering your post in a polite manner
is certainly what I'd class as welcoming :D
oi, you quoted me before id had time to edit my font colour lol
Quote by sexkittenhfx
But this is the bit I don't get
In what way would it have helped them?
I ask this genuinely as I really don't see how a list of links covering questions and concerns would make them feel as though they fitted in more.
Jas
XXX
in my opinion its not the reading of the links that will make them feel they fit in, its the fact that they could be referred to those links in a friendly way rather than shot down in flames by some regular posters. does that make sense?
Depending on who got to thread first it could go either way.
One group would be "Hi welcome etc, this has been asked before and there is some great advice here" type friendly post
The other groupl would be "
there's a sticky full of threads at the top of the page if you had bothered to read it you wouldn't be asking these questions now" type unfriendly postIt's the tone of posts (for want of a better word) that makes people feel daunted about posting, not where or how to get the links from.
I don't think that more or differently named threads change that in the slightest.
Jas
XXX
Quote by sexkittenhfx
sassy, are we the sheddy fan club or what?
seriously, i think as were both relatively new we can just see his point!
Your both welcome in my club anyday
However can I point out that these are not all my own points but more so I'm the one who was willing to put up with being ripped to shreds if it was a bad sugestion :D
Quote by sexkittenhfx
sassy, are we the sheddy fan club or what?
seriously, i think as were both relatively new we can just see his point!
I'd always be in sheddy's fan club but for all the wrong reasons I guess :twisted:
I'd be behind this no matter who started the thread or suggestion as I feel sheddy's made a valid point.
ok jas, totally take your point and when it comes down to it its up to admin to decide if they want to add any new advice topics isnt it?
i think the bigger picture being uncovered here is about how we welcome new posters to the forum, and thats a far more important issue so im happy with this thread for teasing that out a bit more
kitten xxx
i think the bigger picture being uncovered here is about how we welcome new posters to the forum, and thats a far more important issue so im happy with this thread for teasing that out a bit more
kitten xxx
Quote by Sassy-Seren
sassy, are we the sheddy fan club or what?
seriously, i think as were both relatively new we can just see his point!
I'd always be in sheddy's fan club but for all the wrong reasons I guess :twisted:
I'd be behind this no matter who started the thread or suggestion as I feel sheddy's made a valid point.
erm me too sassy, i wasnt inferring otherwise! now, to the club house :twisted:
Quote by sexkittenhfx
sassy, are we the sheddy fan club or what?
seriously, i think as were both relatively new we can just see his point!
I'd always be in sheddy's fan club but for all the wrong reasons I guess :twisted:
I'd be behind this no matter who started the thread or suggestion as I feel sheddy's made a valid point.
erm me too sassy, i wasnt inferring otherwise! now, to the club house :twisted:
Quote by Jas-Tim
Depending on who got to thread first it could go either way.
One group would be "Hi welcome etc, this has been asked before and there is some great advice here" type friendly post
The other groupl would be "
It's the tone of posts (for want of a better word) that makes people feel daunted about posting, not where or how to get the links from.
I don't think that more or differently named threads change that in the slightest.
Jas
XXX
Prehaps pointing people to a sticky is a lot more friendly than ffs sake not this again.
I'm not naieve enougth to think it'd stop all repetative questions being raised however if it stems the flow a bit it may just changesome peoples attitude when they reply.
Or do we not want a more newb friendly forum because I can stock up on a job lot of :roll: 's if thats the case.
Like I said it was a sugestion to make the place less dawnting prehaps others have sugestions on how we can acheive the same thing
Sex God
Quote by sexkittenhfx
i think the bigger picture being uncovered here is about how we welcome new posters to the forum, and thats a far more important issue so im happy with this thread for teasing that out a bit more
kitten xxx
I think that is the big issue here, not where people can or cant ask questions, but how the people on here respond to the questions. We have all been new, we have all sat here wondering what sort of response we would get if we posted something and we have all done a post and wished we could delete it only to find someone has quoted us!
Surely it is down to the other members to make the difference to the newer posters. If someone posts a sarcastic reply, then step in with something useful rather than just joining in with the piss taking!
Some people do seem to a big buz out of making others look silly or tearing others to shreds, so it is down to the rest of us to help the ones who are asking the questions, either by giving them the link to a recent similar question, or by trying to give some good advice about posting.
As I said earlier, I think Seedy has a good point, but I am not sure how this would work in reality. Im more for people being a little more forgiving with newer members and not automatically shooting people down for asking silly questions, making silly posts or worrying about the size of their willy
You're obviously taking this far too personally just because I don't agree that a threadful of stickies will turn the forumns into a sunshine filled happy welcoming place.
Don't suggest that I was implying wanting an unfriendly forum because I disgree with you, it just isn't true.
Jas
XXX
Or do we not want a more newb friendly forum because I can stock up on a job lot of icon_ 's if thats the case.
Don't suggest that I was implying wanting an unfriendly forum because I disgree with you, it just isn't true.
Jas
XXX
Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
i think the bigger picture being uncovered here is about how we welcome new posters to the forum, and thats a far more important issue so im happy with this thread for teasing that out a bit more
kitten xxx
I think that is the big issue here, not where people can or cant ask questions, but how the people on here respond to the questions. We have all been new, we have all sat here wondering what sort of response we would get if we posted something and we have all done a post and wished we could delete it only to find someone has quoted us!
Surely it is down to the other members to make the difference to the newer posters. If someone posts a sarcastic reply, then step in with something useful rather than just joining in with the piss taking!
Some people do seem to a big buz out of making others look silly or tearing others to shreds, so it is down to the rest of us to help the ones who are asking the questions, either by giving them the link to a recent similar question, or by trying to give some good advice about posting.
As I said earlier, I think Seedy has a good point, but I am not sure how this would work in reality. Im more for people being a little more forgiving with newer members and not automatically shooting people down for asking silly questions, making silly posts or worrying about the size of their willy
Bravo that woman
brains as well as beauty As far as I can see is that the only ones who would object to being friendly and helpfull is those that enjoy ripping people's posts for the fun of it.
Quote by Jas-Tim
You're obviously taking this far too personally just because I don't agree that a threadful of stickies will turn the forumns into a sunshine filled happy welcoming place.
Or do we not want a more newb friendly forum because I can stock up on a job lot of icon_ 's if thats the case.
Don't suggest that I was implying wanting an unfriendly forum because I disgree with you, it just isn't true.
Jas
XXX
i dont think he was suggesting that you were implying that at all?
and :thumbup: sassy
Quote by Jas-Tim
You're obviously taking this far too personally just because I don't agree that a threadful of stickies will turn the forumns into a sunshine filled happy welcoming place.
Or do we not want a more newb friendly forum because I can stock up on a job lot of icon_ 's if thats the case.
Don't suggest that I was implying wanting an unfriendly forum because I disgree with you, it just isn't true.
Jas
XXX
I'm a vocal person in general and trust me I learnt along time ago (through debating sessions at college) not to take objections personally life is far too short
As for you other concern far from it but like I said it was a sugestion that I hoped others would add to and you've done just that so thankyou :D
Sex God
I kinda have with a leaning towards it not being that usefull. I take Jas-tim's point that stickies don't work that well, the chatroom sticky is currently the best example I can think of with folk still asking questions or seeking their answer outside of that, even though the answer to the question is buried in there somewhere. They either don't see the sticky, can't be arsed to search through the sticky, or more likely, would actually like to raise the question themselves anyway and lets face it, there ain't many of us that go into stickies where we can and respond to posters, so they either find an answer through a link which does fuck all for getting them into the cafe or they ask the question again, but get fuck all response, they aint really moved off the starting grid in either scenario.
There is the added niggle that once a sticky has been made, it can become another little cosh to batter the poster with if they then go post a repeating thread anyways.
Asides this there is the consideration that the current tried and tested method of dealing with repeat questions (which is mostly the members reactions) is a usefull moderating tool, that posters on most forums use, when permitted, to drive the forum along in the direction that most folk are comfortable with, hence the uproar whenever a post that is out of kilter with the general mish mash we have all come to expect when we log on, hits the screen.
In short I can see the theory behind the suggestion, I just dont think it would make much difference and might, as daft as it sounds, make things even more difficult for a new poster to get started cos at least at the moment, some get started by taking a deep breath and asking a done to death question, which for the most part ain't the issue, cos from what I see it's the first few responses they get and their subsequent responses to that, which either opens up the door for the newbie or shuts it in their face. By adding a sticky to the search button there's a chance that it becomes another twig to smack an arse with.
There is the added niggle that once a sticky has been made, it can become another little cosh to batter the poster with if they then go post a repeating thread anyways.
Asides this there is the consideration that the current tried and tested method of dealing with repeat questions (which is mostly the members reactions) is a usefull moderating tool, that posters on most forums use, when permitted, to drive the forum along in the direction that most folk are comfortable with, hence the uproar whenever a post that is out of kilter with the general mish mash we have all come to expect when we log on, hits the screen.
In short I can see the theory behind the suggestion, I just dont think it would make much difference and might, as daft as it sounds, make things even more difficult for a new poster to get started cos at least at the moment, some get started by taking a deep breath and asking a done to death question, which for the most part ain't the issue, cos from what I see it's the first few responses they get and their subsequent responses to that, which either opens up the door for the newbie or shuts it in their face. By adding a sticky to the search button there's a chance that it becomes another twig to smack an arse with.
Quote by davej
I kinda have with a leaning towards it not being that usefull. I take Jas-tim's point that stickies don't work that well, the chatroom sticky is currently the best example I can think of with folk still asking questions or seeking their answer outside of that, even though the answer to the question is buried in there somewhere. They either don't see the sticky, can't be arsed to search through the sticky, or more likely, would actually like to raise the question themselves anyway and lets face it, there ain't many of us that go into stickies where we can and respond to posters, so they either find an answer through a link which does fuck all for getting them into the cafe or they ask the question again, but get fuck all response, they aint really moved off the starting grid in either scenario.
There is the added niggle that once a sticky has been made, it can become another little cosh to batter the poster with if they then go post a repeating thread anyways.
Asides this there is the consideration that the current tried and tested method of dealing with repeat questions (which is mostly the members reactions) is a usefull moderating tool, that posters on most forums use, when permitted, to drive the forum along in the direction that most folk are comfortable with, hence the uproar whenever a post that is out of kilter with the general mish mash we have all come to expect when we log on, hits the screen.
In short I can see the theory behind the suggestion, I just dont think it would make much difference and might, as daft as it sounds, make things even more difficult for a new poster to get started cos at least at the moment, some get started by taking a deep breath and asking a done to death question, which for the most part ain't the issue, cos from what I see it's the first few responses they get and their subsequent responses to that, which either opens up the door for the newbie or shuts it in their face. By adding a sticky to the search button there's a chance that it becomes another twig to smack an arse with.
Prehaps a sticky isn't the solution however it was more a point of raising how some of us respond to quierys in a flipant maner.
With regards to the chat room sticky I've used it once only and with a terific response.
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopicpage/69765/260.html
Also when people have posted in the forum instead of the chat sticky I've either pointed them in the direction of said thread. Or as I've learnt more about chatroom problems answered in their thread with a solution.
If this thread goes some way to stopping the pointless digs or coments that some people obviously get enjoyment from making then I'm happy. It won't affect me personaly so why should I care? The reason is because I get a lot from this site friends, fun and nights out to name a few and I just thought that some people could go that little bit more when it comes to making people feel welcome.
The tittle of the thread is FAQ's not what do you think of my idea of a FAQ sticky. I was hoping to raise the underlynig subject that more than a few people have mentioned in this thread and prehaps comeup with a solution to something that obviously does exist. Rather than me getting a pat on the back for a sugestion that was merely a starting point.
However apart from NWC's mention of Mal's mentoring scheme no one has come up with an alternative sugestion as thats all they are untill we put things into practice
Sex God
If I have failed to answer the underlying question in favour of the actual question, then I apologise, but I thought it was this that I was trying to make a measured unemotional response to with quite probably the same aim as you, albeit with the conclusion that things work out reasonably well at the moment and that attempts to make things even better can often work against the people that they are designed to help, as perverse as that sounds.
Quote by sheddy
Just a thought but sometimes questions get asked about topic's that have been answerd before and whilst its tiresome for some people to answer the same thing over and over again
From a newbies point of view the search button isn't the easiest of things to use if you only using a common word to search with. For instance a search on protection has just returned at least ten pages of results :shock:
I was wondering if we could all benefit from sticky that held links to some of the recent sensible FAQ's (something like the advice sticky) prehaps with a heading encouraging users to use that section before posting a quiery.
Quote by davej
If I have failed to answer the underlying question in favour of the actual question, then I apologise, but I thought it was this that I was trying to make a measured unemotional response to with quite probably the same aim as you, albeit with the conclusion that things work out reasonably well at the moment and that attempts to make things even better can often work against the people that they are designed to help, as perverse as that sounds.
Just a thought but sometimes questions get asked about topic's that have been answerd before and whilst its tiresome for some people to answer the same thing over and over again
From a newbies point of view the search button isn't the easiest of things to use if you only using a common word to search with. For instance a search on protection has just returned at least ten pages of results :shock:
I was wondering if we could all benefit from sticky that held links to some of the recent sensible FAQ's (something like the advice sticky) prehaps with a heading encouraging users to use that section before posting a quiery.
Sorry Dave it wasn't a broadside at you I wanted to quote part of you but as soon as I started little eyes turned up so I had to do it covertly and fast :D
Sex God
Quote by sheddy
Sorry Dave it wasn't a broadside at you I wanted to quote part of you but as soon as I started little eyes turned up so I had to do it covertly and fast
Too much information sheddy, what your doing under the desk has no never mind to me.
So answering your underlying question, I do think that doing fuck all, which sounds like someone failing to see a problem, but is actually a suggested solution and one that I suggest works well at the moment would be my choice. If that aint enough, then you've got to appeal not only to the poster that rips the piss and yes that does happen, but also to the newbie coming on who doesn't recognise its piss taking and doesn't have the communication skills or the initial courage to deal with it. All in all I see that some solutions may well be bigger than the actual problem warrants.
Sheddy, I think you SHOULD get a pat on the ass................I mean back 
for bringing this to the attention of the members. If it helps to make the forums a more inviting place for newbies then it's a job well done !
People come and people go, some newbies will post a few times and never be heard of again while others, like me, will stay and become post whores in a short space of time.
I'm still here because of a few members making me feel very welcome when I first arrived. If I'd been put off in those crucial first days, I wouldn't have made so many new friends and potential playmates or had some very enjoyable meets.
for bringing this to the attention of the members. If it helps to make the forums a more inviting place for newbies then it's a job well done ! People come and people go, some newbies will post a few times and never be heard of again while others, like me, will stay and become post whores in a short space of time.
I'm still here because of a few members making me feel very welcome when I first arrived. If I'd been put off in those crucial first days, I wouldn't have made so many new friends and potential playmates or had some very enjoyable meets.
