Dear Sweet Gentlemen
I'm sorry, but this has to be said.
How often do you lads (and ladies) without perminant partners have sex? In general I mean? Once a week? Twice a week?
I get around 6-8 PMs, as well as 'enquiries' from other sources, a day. It doesn't take a genius to figure out I can't meet all of them even if I wanted to. The ones I do meet tend to be those sane, cheerful and friendly sounding guys are know what the game is about.
From little girlie chats with other ladies (yes! We DO talk to each other), it's become clear to me one or two or more of you lads are being ROYAL PAINS IN THE BUTT!!! Whether it's moaning on the forum or great big swathes of emails which boarder on spamming, it's still unnecessary. You can't coerce us into having sex with you just to make you go away.
Now... I've been around the track a few times as you know.
But the point I'm making is that you are actually chasing girls away by behaviour which sometimes boarders on obsession.
End of rant.
Hxx
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Fellas, pay attention...
Hi Heather,
I can understand your annoyance. It also means that when a non-pushy guy like me replies, his reply is often submerged by all the others and doesn't get noticed.
Also the converse is that when a normal, non-pushy guy advertises as a single guy he gets no replies because he is "tarred with the same brush".
smiles
I can understand your annoyance. It also means that when a non-pushy guy like me replies, his reply is often submerged by all the others and doesn't get noticed.
Also the converse is that when a normal, non-pushy guy advertises as a single guy he gets no replies because he is "tarred with the same brush".
smiles
I'm sorry, but this has to be said
Don't despair Heather. There are some that are listening.Kit and I see the single women, couples AND successful single men who visit this forum as being thoughtful, adventurous and having a full and active sex life. If are looking for desperation, you knocked on the wrong door! :P
And my thanks to all those who have contacted us understanding that, it is a pleasure hearing from you.
LHK
KitKat
x
Well said Kit. I've been swinging for a couple for years now and have met dozens of nice couples and ladies. So I've seen and heard a lot of war stories. I'll relay one of my own....
The first couple that I ever met was in Wokingham two years ago. They advertised for single guys for a gangbang and video session, that being their fantasy, they naturally got 250+ replies.
After deleting the dick shots and the one line wannafucks they were left with 50. They picked out ten of them and invited all ten, knowing that only 3 or 4 would actually turn up. Two turned up....me and another guy who was "anxious to get it over with quickly as he had a party to go to".
The look on the couples faces said it all as he departed still doing his flys up and yapping into his mobile.
I never felt so sorry for anyone in my life as that couple and it made me realise that the swinging arena is not how I had imagined it to be. They told me how difficult it is for couples and ladies to find the right people and they remain good friends to this day, although they have moved away from my area now unfortunately :cry: .
I guess the point that I am trying to make is that for the guys in this game who don't whine, don't push, who are courteous and actually turn up its really not that difficult to have a damn good time. Failure to do all of these things is what pushes the genuine people away from swinging...which is what I think Heather is trying to say.
Peter
The first couple that I ever met was in Wokingham two years ago. They advertised for single guys for a gangbang and video session, that being their fantasy, they naturally got 250+ replies.
After deleting the dick shots and the one line wannafucks they were left with 50. They picked out ten of them and invited all ten, knowing that only 3 or 4 would actually turn up. Two turned up....me and another guy who was "anxious to get it over with quickly as he had a party to go to".
The look on the couples faces said it all as he departed still doing his flys up and yapping into his mobile.
I never felt so sorry for anyone in my life as that couple and it made me realise that the swinging arena is not how I had imagined it to be. They told me how difficult it is for couples and ladies to find the right people and they remain good friends to this day, although they have moved away from my area now unfortunately :cry: .
I guess the point that I am trying to make is that for the guys in this game who don't whine, don't push, who are courteous and actually turn up its really not that difficult to have a damn good time. Failure to do all of these things is what pushes the genuine people away from swinging...which is what I think Heather is trying to say.
Peter
Mod
This is mainly for Heather and KitKat, but not exclusively. I hav only been on this site a short time, but have thoroughly enjoyed the topics that pop up and the relatively sensible views of people (tongue in cheek!). I also enjoy the amusing comments and 'true-life' experiences as Peter has mentioned. How boring this could be if we came on here and just saw comments like 'shag wanted'. Not very stimulating, physically or mentally. Heather and KitKat, I enjoy your company, I enjoy your comments and I feel you are smashing people I would like to meet sometime. Unfortunately you are too far away from me, but on here you are right next to me. I gather it takes time and effort to sort the wheat from the chaff, but when panning for gold, there's always the chance of a little nugget amongst the crap!
TTFN
TTFN
Mal, Pete...
You are exactly the kind of fellas I like to play with.
Pete, thanks for telling us that story. If a few of these young guns read that perhaps they'd see swinging for what it is.
What we need, to compliment my 'advice to single guys' is the perspective of successful experienced guys like yourselves. Would one of you consider doing that? Mark, I am sure, would be chuffed to add it to mine... then perhaps we could all persuade blokes who would be better off with prostitutes to go and seek them out...
Just because we are free with our favours (in my case VERY free :twisted: :twisted: ) it doesn't make us 'objects' they way some blokes on here make me feel at times.
Lets all have a laugh about it....
:lol: :lol:
Hxx
You are exactly the kind of fellas I like to play with.
Pete, thanks for telling us that story. If a few of these young guns read that perhaps they'd see swinging for what it is.
What we need, to compliment my 'advice to single guys' is the perspective of successful experienced guys like yourselves. Would one of you consider doing that? Mark, I am sure, would be chuffed to add it to mine... then perhaps we could all persuade blokes who would be better off with prostitutes to go and seek them out...
Just because we are free with our favours (in my case VERY free :twisted: :twisted: ) it doesn't make us 'objects' they way some blokes on here make me feel at times.
Lets all have a laugh about it....
:lol: :lol: Hxx
Sex God
Well said, Heather - once again!
From personal experience I've met loads of single guys both at clubs and some time ago now, in private, and most "play the game", they know what is expected of them, how far they can go, and are respectful but to the people they are playing with and other singles in the same position as them. It is the minority - usually young men, but not exclusively - who behave rudely, badly, or who are just too eager, and basically piss everyone else off. We all know these guys are looking for sex, but as Heather says, we are not objects and if you want simply sex with no strings with no effort on your part, please get your hand in your pocket and go and see a prostitute
From personal experience I've met loads of single guys both at clubs and some time ago now, in private, and most "play the game", they know what is expected of them, how far they can go, and are respectful but to the people they are playing with and other singles in the same position as them. It is the minority - usually young men, but not exclusively - who behave rudely, badly, or who are just too eager, and basically piss everyone else off. We all know these guys are looking for sex, but as Heather says, we are not objects and if you want simply sex with no strings with no effort on your part, please get your hand in your pocket and go and see a prostitute
Thanks Heather,
I usually don't drone on about my perspectives too much as I don't like to sound too condescending, but heres a few if anyone is interested.
When you contact someone for fun you are asking them to make one of the most personal decisions it is possible to make....to share their bodies with you. So I always give it the importance and time that sort of decision deserves when writing to them. One liners tell them that they are not important enough to spend much time on and they will regard you exactly the same.
Most couples/fems want a person that they can be comfortable with and will usually be more interested in who you are rather than the fact that youre hung like a horse and can breathe through your ears(although that helps :twisted: ).
Sex is admittedly a physical thing to many guys, so its easy to believe that the physical bit is the only bit or at least the most important, this is why a lot of men only send dick shots out, which most couples or fems in my experience actually find a complete turn off.
Getting no replies. This is the ususal moan...believe me its all part of the game. If you can't be prepared to be turned down many times then go find that working girl in the massage parlour...she will never turn you away... Most couples and fems that I've met have advertised and had hundreds of replies, logistically it simply isn't possible to pay them all the same attention. So even if you are what they are looking for you may not get the chance. I find its best to reply to an ad several weeks after it has gone up...by then they won't be getting so many replies and have probably been stood up several times so there is more of a chance.
Not turning up: I'm convinced that this is simply just nerves. Its easy to shag someone when youre staring at their picture on a monitor. The imagination runs riot with the images of that lovely luscious pair of lips dripped around your throbbing member...now a reality check: Youre in a room with other guys as well...naked. Possibly with a video cam going or pictures being taken..the other guys are younger and well hung...she looks at you and says "its your turn". I really don't think many guys can put themselves in this position before actually comitting to a meeting, Ive seen people actually walk out of meets because they simply can't do it, and even passed guys sitting in cars outside the couples house struggling with the decision on whether to go in! The best I ever heard was "My house caught fire so I had to turn round".
Last point: think of a meet as an opportunity to make friends...not to just fuck someone. When I go to meets I usually dress fairly smart and take a bottle of wine or something. Afterwards I always compliment the fem on her sex skills.....as soon as I get back home I drop an email of thanks. Thats the recipe for getting invited back for more and sometimes a copy of the videotape as well... its amazing how many guys just zip up and leave with a quick goodbye having blown their wad.
Okay...well thats a few perspectives and theres more as well....but I'm starting to sound like a know all so I'll shut up :lol:
Good thread Heather. Hey, do you like Chardonnay? :lol: :lol: :lol:
Peter
I usually don't drone on about my perspectives too much as I don't like to sound too condescending, but heres a few if anyone is interested.
When you contact someone for fun you are asking them to make one of the most personal decisions it is possible to make....to share their bodies with you. So I always give it the importance and time that sort of decision deserves when writing to them. One liners tell them that they are not important enough to spend much time on and they will regard you exactly the same.
Most couples/fems want a person that they can be comfortable with and will usually be more interested in who you are rather than the fact that youre hung like a horse and can breathe through your ears(although that helps :twisted: ).
Sex is admittedly a physical thing to many guys, so its easy to believe that the physical bit is the only bit or at least the most important, this is why a lot of men only send dick shots out, which most couples or fems in my experience actually find a complete turn off.
Getting no replies. This is the ususal moan...believe me its all part of the game. If you can't be prepared to be turned down many times then go find that working girl in the massage parlour...she will never turn you away...
Most couples and fems that I've met have advertised and had hundreds of replies, logistically it simply isn't possible to pay them all the same attention. So even if you are what they are looking for you may not get the chance. I find its best to reply to an ad several weeks after it has gone up...by then they won't be getting so many replies and have probably been stood up several times so there is more of a chance. Not turning up: I'm convinced that this is simply just nerves. Its easy to shag someone when youre staring at their picture on a monitor. The imagination runs riot with the images of that lovely luscious pair of lips dripped around your throbbing member...now a reality check: Youre in a room with other guys as well...naked. Possibly with a video cam going or pictures being taken..the other guys are younger and well hung...she looks at you and says "its your turn". I really don't think many guys can put themselves in this position before actually comitting to a meeting, Ive seen people actually walk out of meets because they simply can't do it, and even passed guys sitting in cars outside the couples house struggling with the decision on whether to go in! The best I ever heard was "My house caught fire so I had to turn round".
Last point: think of a meet as an opportunity to make friends...not to just fuck someone. When I go to meets I usually dress fairly smart and take a bottle of wine or something. Afterwards I always compliment the fem on her sex skills.....as soon as I get back home I drop an email of thanks. Thats the recipe for getting invited back for more and sometimes a copy of the videotape as well...
its amazing how many guys just zip up and leave with a quick goodbye having blown their wad.Okay...well thats a few perspectives and theres more as well....but I'm starting to sound like a know all so I'll shut up :lol:
Good thread Heather. Hey, do you like Chardonnay? :lol: :lol: :lol:
Peter
Mod
Jags
Is that the bottle or it's contents you are referring to? :P
Mal
Is that the bottle or it's contents you are referring to? :P
Mal
Mod
Jags
Mmmmm, thats an offer that's hard to refuse!
Mal
Mmmmm, thats an offer that's hard to refuse!
Mal
Contents of bottle, of course! Don't do foreign objects...foreign fluids welcome
Not even just to remove the cork Jags? could be a neat party trick.
Once saw a woman shoot a ping pong ball across the room. Several one after the other in fact.
lhk
Kat
Sex God
PClark - phew, you write more than I do . I basically agree (well, sort of), though what's wrong with sending dick shots? :wink:
Jags & Kat, you just can't be left alone for a minute without getting saucy, can you!
. I basically agree (well, sort of), though what's wrong with sending dick shots? :wink: Jags & Kat, you just can't be left alone for a minute without getting saucy, can you!
Sex God
I don't know where you're going wrong to be honest! Perhaps you're just unlucky and mailing foks who are absolutely overwhelmed with replies, or the girls you're emailing are afking for something slightly different that what you've got. But it's impossible to tell without actually being a fly on the wall!
Quote by bluexxx
what's wrong with sending dick shots?
Actually I quite like dick shots Blue, and Ive got some of my own that I like to share round liberally...although mine usually have someone elses anatomy in the picture too :wink: . I think the problem is when someone sends only a dick shot in an email. Most couples I've met say that they usually delete them straight away.
Not sure what youre doing wrong Manchester male, all that I've said is what I've heard from people I've met. I do tend to travel a bit for the right people(Wales is the furthest) so maybe Ive just had a broader choice
.Peter
Sex God
I'll try and make my spelling better than in my last post - omg it's terrible!
Pclark , I guess you're right, perhaps a dick shot and nothing else is a bit off puttting, especially if it's not a very pretty one! Dick shots with other people's anatomies in are always welcome however
Pclark , I guess you're right, perhaps a dick shot and nothing else is a bit off puttting, especially if it's not a very pretty one! Dick shots with other people's anatomies in are always welcome however
Warming the Bed
How often do I make love, at this moment less than Father Christmas!!!!! 
:D :D :D :D
:D :D :D :D
Sex God
Ah yes, but the big FC has all those little elves to keep him happy, and don't think that Rudolph is innocent either - that red nose is a dead give away
Dominic..
It's not where you are going wrong (as you appear to be going right), the point of this thread is still salient (Christ! That's the most grown up word i've used all day!).
It's the gung-ho dickheads that are spoiling it for you.
Keep being polite, keep trying.... one day you'll be at the right place at the right time with the right people - trust me!
Pete
Excellent posting. Mark really should pin that up next to mine. How else are new comers going to find out these things unless we more experienced people share our thoughts?
Hxx
It's not where you are going wrong (as you appear to be going right), the point of this thread is still salient (Christ! That's the most grown up word i've used all day!).
It's the gung-ho dickheads that are spoiling it for you.
Keep being polite, keep trying.... one day you'll be at the right place at the right time with the right people - trust me!
Pete
Excellent posting. Mark really should pin that up next to mine. How else are new comers going to find out these things unless we more experienced people share our thoughts?
Hxx
Sex God
Oooohhhh, thank you greatly - can't wait :P
Warming the Bed
Elves would be good, but rudolfs antlers dont do it for me!!
Sex God
Me neither, but the big FC is a pervy git - comes from years of sneaking down chimneys - I bet he's seen some sights at Xmas Eve piss ups, you know!
Warming the Bed
Yes, he can be a bit perverse, especially leaving something in your stocking
Sex God
Yuk :shock: , yeah, never thought of that - hey, Kat, has the big FC visited your stockings lately :twisted:
:twisted: 