First Bi Encounter

6 Jan 2007

I have been more and more intrigued lately by the Bi side of life. The only problem is where to start. Im wondering is it a good idea to have this experience with a single Bi fem ( although lack of experience in this field may put them off), or to meet with a couple where there is a bit of something i know there too and my attentions can be split between the two, maybe taking the pressure off of the situation. I really cant decide which way would be best. I dont want to make the wrong choice. Thats if it really does matter how different the choices are. If you would like to give me the benefit of your knowledge and experience, how was your first time, was it with a couple or a single bi female/male, or more than one female/male. Did you, like me only realise your bi side later on in life and how did you feel about potentially exploring it?
ps this is not a thread looking for offers( although all gratefully recieved) :twisted: wink

Louise xx

6 Jan 2007

I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body, does that count?
lol

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
What about clubs? You ever been or thought of going?

6 Jan 2007

Louise, you do pose some good and interesting questions you know! i think alot of folk just muddle through with this first steps stuff, but you, you just come right on out and ask the SH oracle (and get answers to questions alot of newbie folk are pondering too but darnt ask :thumbup: )
on that note i've forgot what i was going to say :doh: - I'll come back to it lol

6 Jan 2007

my first encounter was early last year at my first social
i had never really considered or even given a thought as to whether i was bi or not, i knew there were female friends i fancied (not even sure that is the right word) but never thought much of it
at the social i met someone who totally blew me away, there was an instant attraction, and later when we were in close proximity, cant even really remember how it started, we started kissing, it was electric and certainly put the look of shock on the faces of the guys standing round us at the time, we ended up on the floor and the rest of the details i wont give away, but we also became good friends.
needless to say when we see each other, that electricity and attraction is still there, definately for me anyway and she will always be very special to me.
quite odd really, when i told my sister about my swinging life and females etc, she wasnt at all surprised about the females but was about the swinging lol.
Earthy xx

6 Jan 2007

think you have to feel right about it ,you will know if it feels right,mrs ns first time was at a club we swore we would only go to see wat it was like ,a few party games lots of alcohol later we ended up going to watch in the playroom and she ended up having a fff 3 sum,which was we have met a few cpls with bi fem and a few single bi fems some good and some not so good made some good freinds along the way all over the we have met you end up as freinds and mrs n finds sometimes that she wont play with them because of that .think you will find out all in due course but hope you have fun doing it. lol

6 Jan 2007

Other than a bit of a fascination with my best friends breasts (they were huge!) when I was about 16 I never really thought much about my bi side until I was halfway through my 20's. I was curious for a while and discussed it with my crowd of friends at the time. They were all curious (or so they said) but not to the extent of doing something about it. I wanted to satisfy that curiousity and I'm very very glad I did! biggrin

Eventually I mentioned it to a guy I was mates with and he said that he knew someone who might be interested in meeting me. I didn't want someone with no experience, what would be the point in both of us fumbling through it?! So we chatted on the phone and online and then eventually I met her on a one to one basis and had one of the most amazing sexual experiences I've ever had. (Until I met her with her husband that is... that was even more amazing!) lol

I didn't want someone I knew in case it all went tits up but that was in my mid twenties and we're still good friends now. Sadly that's not the case for my crowd of friends... I told them about it and none of them have spoken to me since! :shock: Nowt as strange as folk!
Just make sure you find someone you're comfortable with Louise... take it at your pace and see where you end up!! Am sure you'll have a great time and whether you decide to do it again or not at least you'll have had the experience and be able to make an informed choice if you're a bi tickler or not! ;) Enjoy!
DGxx

6 Jan 2007

Well... when growing up I always thought I was gay, so I've been through the same thing but in reverse! lol

My first F/F experience was when I was 14 and then had a girlfriend when I was 15, we were together for two years. Anway when we split up I got curious about men and what all the fuss was about so at 17 I lost my hetero virginity.
He was a lovely guy, but we were friends and there was no pressure - which is what I would suggest.
Don't put pressure on yourself, and don't make any promises to a female/couple and above all else be honest.
There are bound to be lots of ladies out there that are having the same thoughts and worries as you, you've just got to find them.
kiss

6 Jan 2007

Clubs are sometimes a good way Louise, it all depends on how you are feeling on the day. My first experience was at a club, I had no idea it would happen, didn't go with that expectation. The lady was younger than me and much more experienced and she just took control and then I returned the favour and it all just came naturally in the end (pardon the pun). I like my bi-side, I don't always enjoy a bi-liaison as I have to feel good vibes from the other party, if they don't seem to enjoy it neither do I. But 98% of the time it's great.
All in all, you can just tell when it feels right and you will get that feeling I am sure.
Mar xxx

6 Jan 2007

Quote by louise_and_joe
I really cant decide which way would be best. I dont want to make the wrong choice. Thats if it really does matter how different the choices are.

My oppinion - there is no right or wrong, best way etc, its what feels right to you.....and the more you try to plan it/ orchestrate it/ make some ideal in your head about how it will be, the higher the chance that it wont! just go with the flow hun, it'll happen in time & in my experience its the stuff you dont plan in advance that ends up being incredible wink

how was your first time, was it with a couple or a single bi female/male, or more than one female/male. Did you, like me only realise your bi side later on in life and how did you feel about potentially exploring it?

when i was in my teens, being bi or lesbian was a big no-no within my circle of friends, it was guys all the way and 'doing women' was wrong rolleyes

so it was never really something I thought or fantasised about dunno

we always did the whole girly linking arms, dirty dancing with eachother in nightclubs etc but it was an attention thing not an attraction thing :dunno: One night we were all a bit pissed and me & a mate ended up full on snogging, shocked the hell out of everybody and that was it, flicked a switch in me so to speak but it wasnt til about 3 years ago that I actually did owt about it. :dunno:
Out with a vanilla friend and she pulls some bloke I cant stand & the feeling was mutual, cutting a long story short we ended up sleeping at his place, her with him and me on the sofa playing gooseberry:roll:, a short while later he wasnt exactly floating her boat and god knows how but i kinda took over while he watched - and then went to sleep and left us to it rotflmao

:doh: We left before he got up and its never been discussed between us since :dunno:
I guess, to answer your question, my first time then was just fem:fem and the guy really was passive (or disinterested lol

) enough to not want to come between what was happening and I liked that.... and :idea: (on goes another switch :lol smile

having just read that back to myself I've just realised that's the re-occuring theme in almost all the bi-encounters I've had since, and probably the reason I find it incredibly difficult to plan to play with other fems, or play in clubs, because there's always someone who wants in on the action :lol:

6 Jan 2007

Quote by louise_and_joe
I have been more and more intrigued lately by the Bi side of life. The only problem is where to start. Im wondering is it a good idea to have this experience with a single Bi fem ( although lack of experience in this field may put them off), or to meet with a couple where there is a bit of something i know there too and my attentions can be split between the two, maybe taking the pressure off of the situation. I really cant decide which way would be best. I dont want to make the wrong choice. Thats if it really does matter how different the choices are. If you would like to give me the benefit of your knowledge and experience, how was your first time, was it with a couple or a single bi female/male, or more than one female/male. Did you, like me only realise your bi side later on in life and how did you feel about potentially exploring it?
ps this is not a thread looking for offers( although all gratefully recieved) :twisted:
Louise xx

hi lousie,
i am in a similar position, having finally being able to accept that i am curious about all aspects of my sexuality. i feel excited about exploring it and believe that the opportunity will come along when i am ready to deal with it.
i'm hoping to learn lots from this thread and hope people send in their experiences for me to consider,
curvy XX

6 Jan 2007

I didn't actually realise I was bi even tho at 11 year old I fancied my I.T teacher and when I was 15 I fancied my R.E teacher dunno

:dunno: until I actually met someone off a chatroom who was bi when I was about 17/18. My first experience was after a drunken night out on the grass of a park at like 2:30am :shock: The lass had a girlfriend at the time confused

For me, I fancied this lass and so I knew it was the right time for me. People always like to lose their virginity to a man who is special to them and don't want to remeber it as being a drunken one-night stand so maybe it could apply to this situation aswell? :dunno:
Anyway, whether it be with a couple or one-to-one, I hope it all goes well. A little voice from within ur soul will tell u when the 'right' time will be.
All The best,
Miss Cream xxx

6 Jan 2007

I wondered how true it is that Bi women wear thumb rings, as a 'sign'?
There was a girl in a local who was quite up-front and outspoken. I noticed that she had a thumb ring on, and commented that I'd heard that denoted bi-sexuality. She laughed it off, but at the end of the night, there was just me, the landlord (who had already played with my partner-so knew the score), my partner and this (married) girl.
I thought we were going, so I went out to the car. When my partner didn't come out, I strolled back in, to be confronted by the sight of the girls beginning a long, very sensual kiss. The landlord looked as surprised as me. It developed from there into all three of them 'entertaining' each other while I enjoyed the show.
That was her first (and only, so far) Bi experience, and it came totally out of the blue.

6 Jan 2007

I wondered how true it is that Bi women wear thumb rings, as a 'sign'?
No idea dunno

6 Jan 2007

I've seen thumb rings discussed often on American Bi/Lesbian message boards. Maybe it's just a US thing?

6 Jan 2007

I wear a thumb ring... never heard that theory before though! dunno

Don't suppose it matters for me! lol

6 Jan 2007

Quote by louise_and_joe
I have been more and more intrigued lately by the Bi side of life. The only problem is where to start. Im wondering is it a good idea to have this experience with a single Bi fem ( although lack of experience in this field may put them off), or to meet with a couple where there is a bit of something i know there too and my attentions can be split between the two, maybe taking the pressure off of the situation. I really cant decide which way would be best. I dont want to make the wrong choice. Thats if it really does matter how different the choices are. If you would like to give me the benefit of your knowledge and experience, how was your first time, was it with a couple or a single bi female/male, or more than one female/male. Did you, like me only realise your bi side later on in life and how did you feel about potentially exploring it?
ps this is not a thread looking for offers( although all gratefully recieved) :twisted:
Louise xx

Hello hun
I think its a good idea to have this experience with a single girl as long as she knows that it is your first time and is cool with it.
I also think if you meet with a couple you are right about there being a bit of both so to speak and you may feel more secure.
As for me I suspected I was Bi from my first pregnancy as my fantasies went a bit wild from then on and then with each subsequent pregnancy got a bit stronger until after my last pregnancy they never really went away. My first time was great, the second also and the 3rd was pretty damned good too, so I am now no longer curious :twisted:
Love
FIRE xxx

6 Jan 2007

i agree with what the girls have already said to be honest....
i had a bi experience down a dirty alley way. it was somthing i wanted to try and so i just did one night with a guy i had chatted to online...we agreed to meet, and it happened..
guess i kinda forced myself into it...thought about it for so long, just thought better to get it over with! lol...
i guess i wish i had waited for the right person...someone who makes you feel comfortable, and someone who leads you i guess..someone you can talk to...i certainly didnt wana end up having the expierience down an alley way!!
guess what im saying is make sure its right for you, dont pressure yourself about it, and like has already been said, make sure you talk about it with the person..what do they want from it, what do you want from it...its like the first time you sleep with someone, you dont want to have memories of it being with someone you hate...no regrets and all that..
sorry for jumping on a female thread, just wanted to respond as it sounds like you are where i was a few years ago...
x

6 Jan 2007

Quote by Darkfire
Louise, you do pose some good and interesting questions you know! i think alot of folk just muddle through with this first steps stuff, but you, you just come right on out and ask the SH oracle (and get answers to questions alot of newbie folk are pondering too but darnt ask :thumbup: )
on that note i've forgot what i was going to say :doh: - I'll come back to it

Thanks Darkfire, I nearly deleted this thread just after writing it because i thought it may make me look a little silly. redface

I do tend to ask a lot of questions but i always know that i will get good honest, informative answers from them, which is the case already from this thread. So thank you everyone. kiss

I can already see that it has helped another member who has the same thoughts as me. So i wont worry about posting next time.
Louise xx

6 Jan 2007

Quote by easy
I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body, does that count?
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
What about clubs? You ever been or thought of going?

We have thought about going but cant seem to get a decent recommendation from someone who will already know of some. Maybe we should just go and find out for ourselves. Thanks for the suggestion easy.
kiss

Louise xx

6 Jan 2007

ooh i wear a thumbring but never knew it was a sign
as for the club thing i would go as a couple first and see if you like them, clubs are not for everyone.
Earthyxx

6 Jan 2007

Me and *Him* talked about this long and hard before we went for it. I personally (*Her*) wanted my first time to be FF, with no one else there, but *Him* wasn't too happy with that so we decided to leave it. Then we met someone who befriended us at our first munch (a year ago to the day almost!) and we became really good friends. To be honest the thought hadnt really crossed our minds, but then we all got a bit tipsy at our house one night and whilst *Him* was in the loo, she kissed me. Then when we went for a fag it was made clear that something could happen if we wanted it to and it went from there.
I think at the end of the day, you've got to really just think about whats best for you in this situation. After all, it's no one else thats going for it is it, and if it's your first time you need to be as comfortable as possible
*Her*

20 Jan 2007

Hi all
My first proper bi experience was last week (I'm 28). She was part of a couple who we met on another site. omg the nerves!!! After a bit of dutch courage I think I went a bit mad and completely surprised myself by taking the lead (even though she was the one with all the experience). I was really rather dominant (not like me at all) but I gave myself a metaphorical pat on the back for all the orgasms she had. omg she even squirted a few times, something she said she'd never done before. Would love to experiment with other ladies now :twisted:
I think as first experiences go it was a very good one. No complaints from me biggrin

20 Jan 2007

It's a very interesting point to raise hun and not silly at all. passionkiss

I took the plunge from bi-curious with a couple and to be honest, it wasn't the best for me. I feel more relaxed with a single fem than a couple. I've had a meet with a lady who hadn't been with another lady before and it was very enjoyable. I told her to just take things at her own pace and only go as far as she was comfortable with.
As long as the lucky lady in question knows you're a bi 'virgin' I'm sure she'll be understaning enough to take the lead but allow you to stop if you feel you don't want to go further.
You have a pm wink

20 Jan 2007

well i haven't tried it yet, but i;m not ruling it out............ :high-smile:

21 Jan 2007

Quote by Whatyalike2do
Hi all

Hello you two wave

Welcome to the Forum :thumbup:
>end hijack>

21 Jan 2007

The first time I properly snogged a woman was really horny.....I wanted to do more than that, but didn't quite know whether I could and whether I would please her or not....
I think if you want to go for it then go for it, but just tell the woman that you have never done it before....and that you want to go slowly.....and just find out what you like and what you don't like....

21 Jan 2007

Quote by Darkfire
Louise, you do pose some good and interesting questions you know! i think alot of folk just muddle through with this first steps stuff, but you, you just come right on out and ask the SH oracle (and get answers to questions alot of newbie folk are pondering too but darnt ask :thumbup: )

She sure does Darkfire, not silly at all and for that, I thank you Louise.
I have fancied and fantasized about many females for a while and i have decided that I am ready to make this reality now and Im confident enough to do this. I have some 'bi' friends so I am able to chat to them quite openly about this and have realised that when I meet the right person, it will happen, no point forcing the issue as life is pretty grand as it is right now!
So many helpful responses to this thread(as always), will continue to watch with great interest.
Hats off to you Louise worship

Mrs G x

21 Jan 2007

Quote by aj1980
i agree with what the girls have already said to be honest....
i had a bi experience down a dirty alley way. it was somthing i wanted to try and so i just did one night with a guy i had chatted to online...we agreed to meet, and it happened..
guess i kinda forced myself into it...thought about it for so long, just thought better to get it over with! lol...
i guess i wish i had waited for the right person...someone who makes you feel comfortable, and someone who leads you i guess..someone you can talk to...i certainly didnt wana end up having the expierience down an alley way!!
guess what im saying is make sure its right for you, dont pressure yourself about it, and like has already been said, make sure you talk about it with the person..what do they want from it, what do you want from it...its like the first time you sleep with someone, you dont want to have memories of it being with someone you hate...no regrets and all that..
sorry for jumping on a female thread, just wanted to respond as it sounds like you are where i was a few years ago...
x

Don't apologise aj, you made some excellent points there :thumbup:
My first bi experience was in my teens and, while enjoyable, was little more than fumbling to gauge the reaction biggrin

I have had one or two encounters since then and I have to say, for me, I prefer one on one with another fem as opposed to meeting a couple. It's probably all in my head lol, but with a couple I feel under pressure to 'perform' as opposed to being able to relax fully and just enjoy the experience confused

(I have never been made to feel this way I have to add, like I said it's in my head).
Going back to aj's post I would only say the same sort of thing, don't rush it and don't put pressure on yourself to pop your bi cherry. It's better to wait until the right person comes along (and as others have said, I think you will know when that is) so you fully enjoy the experience ;)

21 Jan 2007

Louise; Only daft question is the one you wish you had asked. ;)
Thanks for the reply, I didn't expect one lol

but maybe a club isn't the way to go. I can imagine there being a lot of pressure placed upon you to "perform", specially if there's a lot of males in.
Perhaps a better idea would be to visit Munches or to just chat online with people to see if there's anyone who floats your boat. The good thing about doing it this way is that you can see who you're chatting to before you make any lifestyle-altering decisions (cos let's face it there's got to be some level of physical attraction as well as mental stimulation ;) ). :lol:
The thing that comes across from the posts here is that if you feel pressure, either from someone else or from your own mind to just get stuck in, then it's probably going to kill the mood and the enjoyment for you.
Oh and as for the thumbrings.......... Countess has a huge one on each thumb. :shock: confused

................ just wondering if I need to think about buying a bigger bed. :giggle:

21 Jan 2007

Hiya
I think that i`d had questions about my sexuality ever since i was a kid, as a boy discovering masterbation for the fist time with my friend, and doing it together in his bedroom i`d wondered what it would be like to do more.
Anyway last year i took steps to find out for myself, and though it was only me masterbating a guy and him giving me head it did start the ball rolling, i have now gone a step further by giving head also and enjoing the experience.
I do love women much more than men, and i love kissing and i cant do that with a man and i do want to be in love again, but i cant ignore that there is another side to me and my sexuallity
But as a side note has anyone male/female experienced negative vibes after the event its happened in my case not from me but from the other guys and they have been much more experienced than me
r1rider