Well I've been working on achieving a mmf, mff and mmff with my wife for a few years now. We're both 38 and slim - she has a gorgeous body! With each year that passes, I feel we make progress, although of course it's too slow!
Current status is...
She's agreed to go on a nudist holiday with me (we're going in June to the Dom Rep) - I think/hope this is a big step in the right direction, time will tell.
We'll take erotic novels with us on the holiday (that include all the fantasies I'd like to achieve!)
We now talk in bed (jokingly) about a mmf (usually it's with the fictional 'Simon').
She knows I would like to experiment more, with others, (but always with her included).
...but I need advice on what more to do, what more can I do. I really don't want to get to the end of the holiday without progressing the dream.
I look forward to your ideas/advice.
D.
Obviously I don't know either of you, but reading between the lines it seems blindingly clear to me that this is something YOU want to do and she doesn't, although perhaps she plays along with you because she doesn't want to let you down by giving you a straight NO. Would you be prepared for a straight and final no from her to your suggestions? Perhaps that's the crucial question.
Mike.
Like Mike has said , I think you need to talk to each other and be open and honest.
Don't force / talk her into anything she doesn't want and it will only make for problems in the future
OOO
If I were a man and reading erotic novels on a nudist beach, I really don't fancy my chances of remaining modest ehem ehem...
Careful that it isn't a family friendly nudist beach
Hiya D,
If you are exploring fantasies together it is likely that your sex life has already been improved just by taking that step.
My advice would be to leave your books at home, put your own fantasies on the back burner, and concentrate on discovering what your wife's fantasies are.
You say that you talk jokingly about a MMF threesome, when you talk about this fantasy, do you both get horny? - Assuming you do, does your wife get turned on by the fantasy, or by the fact that the fantasy turns you on?
If she enjoys giving herself an orgasm, either with her fingers or toys, ask her what she thinks about while she does it.
lhk
Kat
Yep what lots of others said . Sounds like youre just wearing her resolve down , and it dont really matter how long it takes , if youre " convincing " her then youre convincing her , and that aint how it works.
Comes accross as a very one sided fantasy. If that's the case then I wouldn't push it.
The old adage about swinging is that it's the men who suggest it and the women that keep it going.
Within any area of a relationship it is surely usual for one partner to be the instigator. We have been married for many years and done many varied things in our lives. I can't really remember a time when we both had the same sudden thought - "we must try that." It has always been one of us suggesting something and the other agreeing, whether it is buying a car, decorating a room or swinging.
Our entry into swinging was similar to dar2005's position now. Initially it was my idea and was met with less than enthusiasm. Over a period of several years and a reluctance on my part to let it drop, but with a great deal of talking about it, we eventually tried a club. It was then another 2 years of regular club going before Mrs northwest was happy to play with others. The rest, as they say, is history, as anyone who knows us from Liaisons will testify.
Should I have dropped the idea when she first said no? If I had then she would never have experienced something that she now finds an extremely enjoyable and important part of her life and I would not have experienced something that I "knew" would be enhancing for both of us.
It's hard to offer dar2005 advice without knowing him or his partner. However, I would say that persistence tempered with a great deal of patience and a lot of open-minded talking worked wonders for us.
Sometimes, when you lead the horse to water, it does take a drink and finds that it really wished it had tried it sooner.