John Snagg was commentating on the University Boat race, which was held on a very misty day,
"In the mist, I can't make out who is in the lead, its either Oxford or Cambridge!"
thechairman18
Sexlightened
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Sex God
Quote by Deviated Prevert
the Jonathan Agnew comment about Ian Botham: "he couldn't get his leg over".
I used to have this on an mp3 on my old pc but then bought a triple set of comedy cds as it was on it. I still cry laughing everytime I hear it, its just priceless, I just wish I could have heard it live when first broadcast so I could bore everyone to death describing in detail where I was when I first heard it.
For those of you who haven't heard it its not the quote thats actually that funny its the whole atmosphere surrounding it, now you can all rush off to google to find it.
Regards
Harry Jones
Master of Sex
what about the quote from johnners again.
" ian botham has just got his leg over"
as he maded a scrambled run, and jumped over the wicket.
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
" ian botham has just got his leg over"
as he maded a scrambled run, and jumped over the wicket.
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: 
Guess what I just found at the top of another site's forum:
To all refugees from paysites everywhere
Some of you may be shocked and saddened by todays breaking news.
A little birdie told us about this a while ago, but, to protect them we had to honour the confidentiality.
:rotflmao:
*Kat wanders off giggling at visions of starving hyenas singing The Monkey song from Jungle book to themselves
Orgasminator
What's yellow and runs off a 13amp plug?
George Best!
George Best!
Sex God
God and ST peter are standing at the gates of heaven and god says to st peter "we're getting a bit busy in here so starting from tomorrow we only let people in who've had a sh1tty day when they died"
Next day a guy comes up to the gates of heaven and st peter says "sorry we're a bit busy so i can only let you in if you've had a sh1tty day" "sh1tty day" the boy says "shitty day i'll tell you. i got let home from my work early and thought i'd surprise the wife and take home some flowers and a box of chocolates. i went into the livingroom and couldn't see her. i went into the kitchen and couldn't see her. i went into the bedroom and shes lying there naked panting and covered in sweat. Shes obviuosly been sh@gging someone else. I ran back through to the livingroom to look for him but he wasn't there so i ran through to the kitchen and he wasn't there. i ran back through to the bedroom and looked out the window and there was a guy hanging on the window Sill. i ran back through to the kitchen and got my hammer then ran back through to the bedroom and hit his hands. he fell 5 storeys and landed in a bush and hes still alive! i ran back through to the kitchen and picked up the fridge and ran back through to the bedroom. i lifted up the fridge to drop it on his head and as i was leaning out i fell out of the window, landed on the pavement and broke my neck"
St peters says "thats a sh1tty day. in you go"
Next guy comes up and st peter says "we're a bit busy in here so i can only let you in if you've had a really sh1tty day" "sh1tty day" the boy says "sh1tty day i'll tell you.
"i was in my flat 7 storeys up cleaning the windows and i stretched too far and fell out. i fell 2 storeys and managed to twist round and grab a window Sill. i was thinking thank feck for that!! and looked up and there was a nutter standing there with a hammer. he started hitting my hands and i fell another 5 storeys and landed in a bush and was still alive. i looked up and this nutters standing there with a fridge and he threw it out. it landed on my head and broke my neck and here i am!"
St peter says "thats a sh1tty day!... in you go.
The next boy comes up to the gates and st peter says "we're a bit busy in here so i can only let you in if you've had a really sh1tty day"
"sh1tty day" *sigh* ..the boy says. "sh1tty day i'll tell you!.. i was hiding in this fridge...
Next day a guy comes up to the gates of heaven and st peter says "sorry we're a bit busy so i can only let you in if you've had a sh1tty day" "sh1tty day" the boy says "shitty day i'll tell you. i got let home from my work early and thought i'd surprise the wife and take home some flowers and a box of chocolates. i went into the livingroom and couldn't see her. i went into the kitchen and couldn't see her. i went into the bedroom and shes lying there naked panting and covered in sweat. Shes obviuosly been sh@gging someone else. I ran back through to the livingroom to look for him but he wasn't there so i ran through to the kitchen and he wasn't there. i ran back through to the bedroom and looked out the window and there was a guy hanging on the window Sill. i ran back through to the kitchen and got my hammer then ran back through to the bedroom and hit his hands. he fell 5 storeys and landed in a bush and hes still alive! i ran back through to the kitchen and picked up the fridge and ran back through to the bedroom. i lifted up the fridge to drop it on his head and as i was leaning out i fell out of the window, landed on the pavement and broke my neck"
St peters says "thats a sh1tty day. in you go"
Next guy comes up and st peter says "we're a bit busy in here so i can only let you in if you've had a really sh1tty day" "sh1tty day" the boy says "sh1tty day i'll tell you.
"i was in my flat 7 storeys up cleaning the windows and i stretched too far and fell out. i fell 2 storeys and managed to twist round and grab a window Sill. i was thinking thank feck for that!! and looked up and there was a nutter standing there with a hammer. he started hitting my hands and i fell another 5 storeys and landed in a bush and was still alive. i looked up and this nutters standing there with a fridge and he threw it out. it landed on my head and broke my neck and here i am!"
St peter says "thats a sh1tty day!... in you go.
The next boy comes up to the gates and st peter says "we're a bit busy in here so i can only let you in if you've had a really sh1tty day"
"sh1tty day" *sigh* ..the boy says. "sh1tty day i'll tell you!.. i was hiding in this fridge...
The 1st mate on a ship goes to see the captain............................knocks on the door................
Captain....................come in!
captain................ah, 1st mate, what can i do for you, please, sit down.
1st mate..............well sir, its a little bit delicate, but i though i should informyou, that i believe the steward is gay.
Captain................really! and what gives you that impression?
1st mate...............well sir, when i went to his cabin last night, to suck him off, he had a distinct taste of shit on his dick!
Captain....................come in!
captain................ah, 1st mate, what can i do for you, please, sit down.
1st mate..............well sir, its a little bit delicate, but i though i should informyou, that i believe the steward is gay.
Captain................really! and what gives you that impression?
1st mate...............well sir, when i went to his cabin last night, to suck him off, he had a distinct taste of shit on his dick!
young city slicker is driving through the countryside of gloucestershire
when he see a sigh saying.......
fete this saturday for local Hospise.
leaning over a hedge is a yokel with a piece of grass dangling from his mouth
city slicker says "scuse me mate whats a hospice"
"bout 3 gallons" replys the yokel.
when he see a sigh saying.......
fete this saturday for local Hospise.
leaning over a hedge is a yokel with a piece of grass dangling from his mouth
city slicker says "scuse me mate whats a hospice"
"bout 3 gallons" replys the yokel.
Sex God
I'm getting bad headaches Doc, what should I do?
Sid, If I want to get rid of headaches I have sex with my wife.
Later that week Sid and the doc are chatting in the pub
How are you feeling Sid, headaches gone?
Sid smiles and replies, you were right! I feel great and by the way you have a great home.
Sid, If I want to get rid of headaches I have sex with my wife.
Later that week Sid and the doc are chatting in the pub
How are you feeling Sid, headaches gone?
Sid smiles and replies, you were right! I feel great and by the way you have a great home.
Sex God
