well I think its a two way process. post a reasonable topic and nobody responds , post an outragious topic and people will respond if only to say how outraged they are ! and so bumps the topic up ! sxboy makes far more news than me ! I say great but then I would rather be known for my inteligent wit and observations on life. If one looks to the newspapers both "the Sun" and "the Times" are very popular publications but at opposite poles of peceved I think maybe this is reflected here in that "Kinky MPs 3 in a bed sex romp orgy" type news will generate far more traffic than " Government backs plans to introduce swinging laws" ( unless the government DO introduce a swinging law and by then the story appears in the Sun as " Barmy Brits Ban Bonking ! " )
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have we created this problem?
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As I am a new one, am I one of the irretating ones then? If so what have I done that is so bad. Everyone has to start some where and only need a quiet word via pm explaining what they are doing wrong. It is very difficult to know what to do to get knowen by the more experianced people. You are also talking to people you dont know and you are worried about upsetting people and getting a bad name. What would you suggest. Surly you were new at some stage. What did you do to get known.
Sex God
Quote by bevntony
To all non-newbies,
is there anyway they we can encourage people that it is quality and not quantity that counts???
Yes - just tell us. I would recommend that someone with experience on the site and/or a mod drops a PM giving exactly this feedback.
have we gotten to the stage that so many new people want to come to muches and parties that we have created a rod for our own back in that people feel they have to write to become regulars regardless of what is written????????
Yes - because all advice is "get yourself known" and while some people are here for the banter and chat, I would guess more are here to actually join/take part in the swinging community of which munches seem to be a great part
Appreciate this is not a "noobs bashing" post but knowledge is power and those of you who have history with the site are the all powerful to those of us trying to join...
Quote by Kit-Off
As I am a new one, am I one of the irretating ones then? If so what have I done that is so bad. Everyone has to start some where and only need a quiet word via pm explaining what they are doing wrong. It is very difficult to know what to do to get knowen by the more experianced people. You are also talking to people you dont know and you are worried about upsetting people and getting a bad name. What would you suggest. Surly you were new at some stage. What did you do to get known.
Having read these two posts I am actually a bit ashamed to have posted a moan in here, I hadn't really thought about things in this way. Maybe it is easier to moan and not come in here than try and help other people out.
Roger the Dragon
Quote by Kit-Off
As I am a new one, am I one of the irretating ones then? If so what have I done that is so bad. Everyone has to start some where and only need a quiet word via pm explaining what they are doing wrong. It is very difficult to know what to do to get knowen by the more experianced people. You are also talking to people you dont know and you are worried about upsetting people and getting a bad name. What would you suggest. Surly you were new at some stage. What did you do to get known.
Not that I am old hand, but very few people (and def not you) have got up my nose in last few months for overposting. I think if you got somthing to say on a thread say it, new or not, your opinion counts the same
I think l the problem regulars may have is the growth in I am listening to this, I saw a pretty cloud today, etc type posts that can drown out more thought provoking threads (in some ways like this one).
Yes we gone over this a few times in the last week which is why I have not repeated everything I have said before, but look on the boards today and we got some good comedy, we got some heartfelt pleas, and other stuff as well. I would say the board is alive and kicking :)
Edit: More tired than I thought, read this and it made no sense so corrected :)
Each to there own is what i say. Would it be possible that someone might like to share all the great things about the site rather than moaning the face off of everyone else about what they don't like.
If you don't like, don't add to the post. Sorted.
Oldies and newbies alike have as much right to post drivel bollocks and guff, the same as the next oldy/newbie.
Blah blah blah blah.
Lots of love, hugs and kisses
Little
XXX
If you don't like, don't add to the post. Sorted.
Oldies and newbies alike have as much right to post drivel bollocks and guff, the same as the next oldy/newbie.
Blah blah blah blah.
Lots of love, hugs and kisses
Little
XXX
Sex God
Quote by Kit-Off
As I am a new one, am I one of the irretating ones then? If so what have I done that is so bad. Everyone has to start some where and only need a quiet word via pm explaining what they are doing wrong. It is very difficult to know what to do to get knowen by the more experianced people. You are also talking to people you dont know and you are worried about upsetting people and getting a bad name. What would you suggest. Surly you were new at some stage. What did you do to get known.
A couple of people have said that the advice given to new people is to get themselves known. I think I may have said it myself to some newcomers, but usually I say 'Get to know people', which is a much more passive thing than 'Getting yourself known'. I think I can see why the former is a more prudent path for new members to take. Taking one's time reading and reacting will then result in becoming known - bit slower albeit but without too much stress.
I'm not making observations about you Kit-Off - you just happen to be the last person to allude to it.
I remember just after I started posting similar being sadi about newbies over posting and I got completely paranoid ~ a couple of the regulars told me to chill out and relax and after that I felt better.
The excitement of suddenly finding a liberated place on the 'net where the exploration sexuality is encouraged and the humour is refreshing can be overwhelming and in an attempt to be part of that you can get swept away.
We do encourage newbies to join in ~ agreed, the plae would stagnate if we didn't ~ but there's joining in and there's taking over! Many of the posts lately don't add to our "liberated" feel but they do detract from it.
As I posted earlier in the week, if the newbies gave a littel more thought about what they want to know, how people can get to know them then the place wouldn't feel quite so "draining".
I don't think anyones telling newbies they aren't welcome, just that they need to be a little more thoughtful.
What would be interesting is to find out if more newbies are joining each day than this time last year and where everyone is coming from ....
C x
The excitement of suddenly finding a liberated place on the 'net where the exploration sexuality is encouraged and the humour is refreshing can be overwhelming and in an attempt to be part of that you can get swept away.
We do encourage newbies to join in ~ agreed, the plae would stagnate if we didn't ~ but there's joining in and there's taking over! Many of the posts lately don't add to our "liberated" feel but they do detract from it.
As I posted earlier in the week, if the newbies gave a littel more thought about what they want to know, how people can get to know them then the place wouldn't feel quite so "draining".
I don't think anyones telling newbies they aren't welcome, just that they need to be a little more thoughtful.
What would be interesting is to find out if more newbies are joining each day than this time last year and where everyone is coming from ....
C x
Could a big part of the problem be that when new poster post a subject thats been posted before they are told to search title first, as we've been there done that.
But when you hit search and see 15+ pages to refer to with that word or phrase included.
Then you start reading the thread only to dicover that after 3-4 post on the subject the old gaurd have hijacked it and started talking utter gibberish with no relevance to the posted subject ( you know who you are) or just qoutes with emoticons
So maybe they are led by the example you refer them to as to forum etiquette in S/H
It also make for a very limited subject matter to post on
As we are masters of our own destiny I find the best control is yourself if the subject matter is pointless ignore it and it will go away. But to post in it and post about it to complain only keeps it alive.
p.s I’m getting very opinionated lately must be this bloody forum
But when you hit search and see 15+ pages to refer to with that word or phrase included.
Then you start reading the thread only to dicover that after 3-4 post on the subject the old gaurd have hijacked it and started talking utter gibberish with no relevance to the posted subject ( you know who you are) or just qoutes with emoticons
So maybe they are led by the example you refer them to as to forum etiquette in S/H
It also make for a very limited subject matter to post on
As we are masters of our own destiny I find the best control is yourself if the subject matter is pointless ignore it and it will go away. But to post in it and post about it to complain only keeps it alive.
p.s I’m getting very opinionated lately must be this bloody forum
Sex God
It's an interesting thread and some good points have been made by people who've contributed.
I guess that threads stay near the top whilst there are people energised enough to want to contribute to something that interests them.
Because of the diverse nature of the membership some crass threads will attract other's who like "crass". The same could be said for intellectually stimulating threads/ comedy/ pleas for help/ etc., etc,.
The fact all types are here says to me we have a healthy forum. :D
Just like the wider world, eh? !!
I guess that threads stay near the top whilst there are people energised enough to want to contribute to something that interests them.
Because of the diverse nature of the membership some crass threads will attract other's who like "crass". The same could be said for intellectually stimulating threads/ comedy/ pleas for help/ etc., etc,.
The fact all types are here says to me we have a healthy forum.
:D Just like the wider world, eh? !!
Is swinging heaven becoming a victim of its own success?
we usually just browse the forums,if something interesting or
funny hits a note with us,we join think thats probably the way to go,
the sites getting more popular,we all have to live with it,join in
when you want,and visa versa,way to go guys n gals
we usually just browse the forums,if something interesting or
funny hits a note with us,we join think thats probably the way to go,
the sites getting more popular,we all have to live with it,join in
when you want,and visa versa,way to go guys n gals
I'm probably going to get allienated for this, but WTF.....
Rhetorical question: Can someone tell me what I am?
- I've been here the best part of six months now.
- I log in almost every night.
- I read almost every thread from top to bottom.
So I'm a "regular" based on my tenure?
But.....
- I have a penchant for one-liners expressing my own (perhaps unique) sense of humour.
So my attitude makes me a "newbie"? Or that's what I understand from some of the posts in this thread. Maybe I'm a regular newbie? :dunno: I'm not an intellectual so I add my colour to the mix the best way I know how - with one-liners.
To compound that view:
- I hardly ever start threads (less than a handful).
- I've never been to a meet or a munch (need to be discreet).
- I only post in the Cafe (don't do dogging or casual).
- I have no ad.
The Cafe is (or should be) somewhere that we can discuss anything we feel is important, interesting or useful to other people. The amount of stuff I've learnt here in the last six months would put any place of further learning to shame. I don't judge people by their use of spelling, grammar or verboseness, any more than I would judge them by colour, creed, race or sexuality. Diversity is one of the cornerstones of the culture we live in and it would be a very dark time if we rejected it.
In any case, I've been here long enough to know that this question has been discussed at length in the past, just as it will be again in the future.
Just my two-penneth :dunno:
Rhetorical question: Can someone tell me what I am?
- I've been here the best part of six months now.
- I log in almost every night.
- I read almost every thread from top to bottom.
So I'm a "regular" based on my tenure?
But.....
- I have a penchant for one-liners expressing my own (perhaps unique) sense of humour.
So my attitude makes me a "newbie"? Or that's what I understand from some of the posts in this thread. Maybe I'm a regular newbie? :dunno: I'm not an intellectual so I add my colour to the mix the best way I know how - with one-liners.
To compound that view:
- I hardly ever start threads (less than a handful).
- I've never been to a meet or a munch (need to be discreet).
- I only post in the Cafe (don't do dogging or casual).
- I have no ad.
The Cafe is (or should be) somewhere that we can discuss anything we feel is important, interesting or useful to other people. The amount of stuff I've learnt here in the last six months would put any place of further learning to shame. I don't judge people by their use of spelling, grammar or verboseness, any more than I would judge them by colour, creed, race or sexuality. Diversity is one of the cornerstones of the culture we live in and it would be a very dark time if we rejected it.
In any case, I've been here long enough to know that this question has been discussed at length in the past, just as it will be again in the future.
Just my two-penneth :dunno:
Sex God
Quote by northwest-cpl
The '50 posts before breakfast' (tm MikeNorth) is not a new phenomenon.
You missed out a derogatory adjective between "50" and "posts", but the current spirit of this forum would be against me putting it back in.
I agree with the concerns that some of us have for the new people who do not seem to have much self-control in here, seeming to be involved in a race to boost their post rate as high as possible. My post rate is just below 5 per day, and I would get worried if it went above 5. I repeat what I have said in another thread, quite a few newer people in here are NOT half as funny as they think they are - their one-line quips fall completely flat. We can only hope that the novelty of seeing their name up "in lights" fades quickly.
Mike.
Quote by bigDewi69
For example I find BigDewi's contributions to be humorous and worthwhile
Someone finds me humourous?? :shock:
:bounce: :bounce: :bounce:
I'm gonna go shout from the rooftops
Anyway, back on topic.....
Umm..... :bounce: :bounce:
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: The thing with you Dewi is that you always post with emotion and character - it works :bounce:
Cu3b4ll - god I can't answer that lot! :shock: but another one that only posts when there's something worthwhile to say, what you do works, don't change
I would say that very few one line quips work (and when they work they're bluddy hilarious! :lol: ) - the rest is drivel. The worst ones when people start a thread like that
............ although the other day I was cracked up at a one line thread - a poor worried Musketeer charging into the Cafe cos he had just tried to shag the dishwasher :rotflmao:We have a chatroom and a PM system for chat - the forums should be mainly full of stuff that is interesting to at least a few of the 20000 or so members! Have a reason for posting something an explanation for posting it if necessary.
I used to get so cross with the over enthusiastic newbies - if it's all one line 'chat' stuff it's boring and it only takes a couple of people to completely swamp the threads. But have learned, over time, that these people always either calm down or leave ....... but there will always be others to take their place :?
Sexpert
Our thoughts, not necessarily in any order;
"Oldie regulars" may post inane topics without fear of it being locked or ridiculed, newbies almost certainly face the fault, just natural, human prejudgement.
Quality IS preferable to quantity, but as has been mentioned on this thread, it is possible for a poster to post both quality AND quantity.
Computer/internet ownership AND sexual liberation seems to be rising exponentially within the UK, hence the accelerating increase in membership.
Many oldies were once multiple posters. Many of these oldies are now measured,quality posters. However, the amount of newbies is accelerating, therefore there will always be more newbies going through the "multi post" stage. Therefore, sadly, the board may be "doomed" to multi postings/lower quality as there will always be a growing influx of eager new posters growing at a rate faster than those who fall by the wayside. Quotes around doomed as it may not be a bad thing, its simply evolution for better or worse. Its easy to try selective reading but as you know, you can skip a boring looking thread, only to return to it later when you`ve run out of things to read, only to find a CORKER of a thread!!!
Newbie bating is alive and doubtlessly deserve it, others don`t. A very grey area.
Downright laziness when writing posts is inexuseable, but posts pointing out small errors are more pointless than the pointless posts.
There is an overuse of the word judgemental to the extent where we are not even sure what it means anymore.
Sorry no summary, conclusions or recommendations other than to say that those who run and assist in the running of the site have an unenviable task.
Maybe this thread will throw up some suggestions?
"Oldie regulars" may post inane topics without fear of it being locked or ridiculed, newbies almost certainly face the fault, just natural, human prejudgement.
Quality IS preferable to quantity, but as has been mentioned on this thread, it is possible for a poster to post both quality AND quantity.
Computer/internet ownership AND sexual liberation seems to be rising exponentially within the UK, hence the accelerating increase in membership.
Many oldies were once multiple posters. Many of these oldies are now measured,quality posters. However, the amount of newbies is accelerating, therefore there will always be more newbies going through the "multi post" stage. Therefore, sadly, the board may be "doomed" to multi postings/lower quality as there will always be a growing influx of eager new posters growing at a rate faster than those who fall by the wayside. Quotes around doomed as it may not be a bad thing, its simply evolution for better or worse. Its easy to try selective reading but as you know, you can skip a boring looking thread, only to return to it later when you`ve run out of things to read, only to find a CORKER of a thread!!!
Newbie bating is alive and doubtlessly deserve it, others don`t. A very grey area.
Downright laziness when writing posts is inexuseable, but posts pointing out small errors are more pointless than the pointless posts.
There is an overuse of the word judgemental to the extent where we are not even sure what it means anymore.
Sorry no summary, conclusions or recommendations other than to say that those who run and assist in the running of the site have an unenviable task.
Maybe this thread will throw up some suggestions?
Sex God
Quote by foxysaround doomed as it may not be a bad thing, its simply evolution for better or worse. Its easy to try selective reading but as you know, you can skip a boring looking thread, only to return to it later when you`ve run out of things to read, only to find a CORKER of a thread!!!
Our thoughts, not necessarily in any order;
"Oldie regulars" may post inane topics without fear of it being locked or ridiculed, newbies almost certainly face the fault, just natural, human prejudgement.
Quality IS preferable to quantity, but as has been mentioned on this thread, it is possible for a poster to post both quality AND quantity.
Computer/internet ownership AND sexual liberation seems to be rising exponentially within the UK, hence the accelerating increase in membership.
Many oldies were once multiple posters. Many of these oldies are now measured,quality posters. However, the amount of newbies is accelerating, therefore there will always be more newbies going through the "multi post" stage. Therefore, sadly, the board may be "doomed" to multi postings/lower quality as there will always be a growing influx of eager new posters growing at a rate faster than those who fall by the wayside. Quotes
Newbie bating is alive and doubtlessly deserve it, others don`t. A very grey area.
Downright laziness when writing posts is inexuseable, but posts pointing out small errors are more pointless than the pointless posts.
There is an overuse of the word judgemental to the extent where we are not even sure what it means anymore.
Sorry no summary, conclusions or recommendations other than to say that those who run and assist in the running of the site have an unenviable task.
Maybe this thread will throw up some suggestions?
Oi! Watch it!!
:P :twisted: I don't really care how many posts people have done, to be honest. I'm probably classed here as one of the oldies, I can remember when I joined and there were just a handful of us that posted in the Cafe and we all got know each other pretty well.
I do remember my elation at finding such a forum though and I think I probably "went a bit mad" when I first joined too. Munches hadn't started when I joined though so it wasn't for the intention of being invited to one...I think I was just over-excited at being here which is why I say "awww" when a see a new person being the same. Don't get me wrong, sometimes I think "why are they posting so much shite??" but then everyone is different.
I do pick up on what someone said earlier in this thread though, people get to know each other and start having private conversations (whether it be by PM, MSN, email or phone) and start to interact less on the board. I'm on a lot of internet forums and this happens everywhere.
I know for certain this is why I post less. I came on (for example) the other night and sent a PM to someone I've known for a long time and started reading threads, then a PM came through from her and we started chatting. I forgot about the forum because I was chatting and lost track of time.
I don't want to blame the newbies for posting anything that is not deemed interesting because there's loads of people joined since I did and I love some of the postings here, I know some of it is boring and has been done to death but really, what am I doing to sort that out? Nothing...because I am chatting to my friends by PM.
Reading back, this sounds like a lot of crap but who cares, I'm posting it anyway before I look to see who is coming to Sparkle!!
I do remember my elation at finding such a forum though and I think I probably "went a bit mad" when I first joined too. Munches hadn't started when I joined though so it wasn't for the intention of being invited to one...I think I was just over-excited at being here which is why I say "awww" when a see a new person being the same. Don't get me wrong, sometimes I think "why are they posting so much shite??" but then everyone is different.
I do pick up on what someone said earlier in this thread though, people get to know each other and start having private conversations (whether it be by PM, MSN, email or phone) and start to interact less on the board. I'm on a lot of internet forums and this happens everywhere.
I know for certain this is why I post less. I came on (for example) the other night and sent a PM to someone I've known for a long time and started reading threads, then a PM came through from her and we started chatting. I forgot about the forum because I was chatting and lost track of time.
I don't want to blame the newbies for posting anything that is not deemed interesting because there's loads of people joined since I did and I love some of the postings here, I know some of it is boring and has been done to death but really, what am I doing to sort that out? Nothing...because I am chatting to my friends by PM.
Reading back, this sounds like a lot of crap but who cares, I'm posting it anyway before I look to see who is coming to Sparkle!!
Well I made my points in The Laird's thread but it is interesting that the discussion is still going on. Maybe open discussion is the way to resolve the matter as the "one line" and "text speak" brigade will probably not join in and these threads will therefore become more interesting?
As said before I agree with a lot of what has been said here - yes the site is attracting more people and therefore more posts, and yes the general welcome to newbies is to join in and consequently what may have seemed like a smaller, cosy community will inevitably grw and get more impersonal.
But, (to answer Calista) as I have said before, newbies will only take over if the oldies let them. The traditional posts are great - long may they continue but if the oldies back out then all that will be left are the younger new members and that would be a shame as the oldies have definitely more to say. It goes with the territory of groowing up!
At the end of the day the answers rest with the site members themselves. No one is asking you to answer or join in every thread that is posted and the is surley big enough for all groups to co-exist.
When it comes to actual meets/munches, there will clearly come a time when one group of people want to attend a certain type of social occasion and another group want to do something different - is there anything wrong in that?
In short, live and let live; continue posting amongst the people you feel happy posting with and dont grt involved or wound up in threads that annoy you - leave the to the people that do enjoy them.
I have been in Holland too long and am taking a compromise view. I will get my clogs ......
As said before I agree with a lot of what has been said here - yes the site is attracting more people and therefore more posts, and yes the general welcome to newbies is to join in and consequently what may have seemed like a smaller, cosy community will inevitably grw and get more impersonal.
But, (to answer Calista) as I have said before, newbies will only take over if the oldies let them. The traditional posts are great - long may they continue but if the oldies back out then all that will be left are the younger new members and that would be a shame as the oldies have definitely more to say. It goes with the territory of groowing up!
At the end of the day the answers rest with the site members themselves. No one is asking you to answer or join in every thread that is posted and the is surley big enough for all groups to co-exist.
When it comes to actual meets/munches, there will clearly come a time when one group of people want to attend a certain type of social occasion and another group want to do something different - is there anything wrong in that?
In short, live and let live; continue posting amongst the people you feel happy posting with and dont grt involved or wound up in threads that annoy you - leave the to the people that do enjoy them.
I have been in Holland too long and am taking a compromise view. I will get my clogs ......
thing is..what is quality.....who is going to decide !!!
What I find rubbish threads, Im sure others like. For example i can't see the point "what you listening to now" threads......but fair play plenty contribute to it so I just simply avoid it. In the end if you don't like a thread don't post on it...it will soon drop off the page if no-one else likes it !!
What I find rubbish threads, Im sure others like. For example i can't see the point "what you listening to now" threads......but fair play plenty contribute to it so I just simply avoid it. In the end if you don't like a thread don't post on it...it will soon drop off the page if no-one else likes it !!
Sex God
Quote by MISSCHIEF
The thing with you Dewi is that you always post with emotion and character - it works :bounce:
Quote by Tune Essence
It's only 'cos yer Welsh ya daft sod!!
Rest my case
can i now ask a question.... is there anyway they we can encourage people that it is quality and not quantity that counts???
I believe it starts the moment someone walks through the door. Rather than respond with the ritual "Hi, sit down and join in the banter we are all mad in here forget your real life" Respond by taking an interest in the person and asking questions. Not A/S/L what are you in to- I don't believe anyone should be asked for that information, Sensible social questions based on their post.
This gets people into the right frame of mind from the start, makes for a more interesting introduction, and, most importantly, gives people the opportuinity to get themselves known without the stresses of diving into miriads of threads.
I think Sean is right, it is a problem we create for ourselves, because when people say hello we tell them to get themselves known without giving them any support or encouragement to do so.
I personally make it a rule never to post in someones hello thread unless I can ask a question that I will feel they will be comfortable asking and offers them the opportunity to have a conversation.
lhk
Kat
Well, just recently there have certainly been a few thought provoking threads and this is another.
Maybe it is good to get some of this out into the open and I truly believe that the recent threads have been an opportunity for both newbies and oldies alike to vent their frustrations.
I don’t necessarily believe that all threads are just to bump up the post count – I do believe a lot are from a “look at me†perspective, however that said, this applies to newbies and oldies alike, it is just that there are more from newbies. When the oldies do similar, they are received and replied to, why, because the individuals are known, but to a newbie that post could also be perceived as dull purely because they cannot participate.
I do detest inane threads, so most of the time I just don’t bother to enter a post in reply.
It was said to me recently that I don’t post enough, that is why people don’t know me. Do I care? Of course not. I post because I want to, not because I need to. I also post one liners and in one or two cases a lot more. Again why? Because I feel it appropriate for me. Do I care that most that I submit is ignored? – Of course not, if I did, my style would change and that would not be in keeping with who I am.
Bottom line – yes there has been an influx of dull threads and replies, but if we look back, they have always been there, just in less numbers and the community was smaller and I believe more patient. How many times have we seen in the past dull threads be turned into great reads purely because one or two individuals have that knack of instilling warmth and humour into any thread.
Now that the site is bigger hopefully some newbies will also show that ability if given the chance.
Maybe it is good to get some of this out into the open and I truly believe that the recent threads have been an opportunity for both newbies and oldies alike to vent their frustrations.
I don’t necessarily believe that all threads are just to bump up the post count – I do believe a lot are from a “look at me†perspective, however that said, this applies to newbies and oldies alike, it is just that there are more from newbies. When the oldies do similar, they are received and replied to, why, because the individuals are known, but to a newbie that post could also be perceived as dull purely because they cannot participate.
I do detest inane threads, so most of the time I just don’t bother to enter a post in reply.
It was said to me recently that I don’t post enough, that is why people don’t know me. Do I care? Of course not. I post because I want to, not because I need to. I also post one liners and in one or two cases a lot more. Again why? Because I feel it appropriate for me. Do I care that most that I submit is ignored? – Of course not, if I did, my style would change and that would not be in keeping with who I am.
Bottom line – yes there has been an influx of dull threads and replies, but if we look back, they have always been there, just in less numbers and the community was smaller and I believe more patient. How many times have we seen in the past dull threads be turned into great reads purely because one or two individuals have that knack of instilling warmth and humour into any thread.
Now that the site is bigger hopefully some newbies will also show that ability if given the chance.
Sex God
Quote by little gem
I'm having Deja Vous about this thread with plenty of others I've read over the last week. Can we all just stop whining and post some decent threads now!
yup, that would prolly be a bit more productive i reckon!
Quote by McCloggie
But, (to answer Calista) as I have said before, newbies will only take over if the oldies let them. The traditional posts are great - long may they continue but if the oldies back out then all that will be left are the younger new members and that would be a shame as the oldies have definitely more to say. It goes with the territory of groowing up!
At the end of the day the answers rest with the site members themselves. No one is asking you to answer or join in every thread that is posted and the is surley big enough for all groups to co-exist.
a good point, well made! ;)
i don't much like seeing the forum swamped with dross too much myself, but the solution would be to be positive, and post something hopefully worth reading to counter the trend. instead of whinging about how shit everyone elses posts are, try posting something yourselves.
most of us have been through little posting frenzies at times, and were probably just as excited as the current newbies when we joined. the difference was, we had good examples to follow looking at what other members were posting, and the forum was slower, so we could get away with posting crap on threads without it affecting the balance of the forum too much. these days, yeah the balance seems to have shifted, and the examples people are following are set by the membership that actually bother to post.
i've slowed right down myself, cos to my mind The Cafe is not particularly fun or interesting these days, and i have little to bounce off, but it's up to us to change that i think, if it's possible to change things at all. i think we might well be past all that, but i do know going through this little row again and again and again serves no purpose whatsoever.
neil x x x ;)
Quote by KitKat
I personally make it a rule never to post in someones hello thread unless I can ask a question that I will feel they will be comfortable asking and offers them the opportunity to have a conversation.
I am of the same frame of mind, I very rarely say hello to people (unless they are people that I have introduced to this site, that's a whole different thing!) I don't do this out of rudeness though, just get a bit fed up of posting
because I don't think I am contributing to anything doing that. On the other hand, if we ignored first posts and didn't :wave: then said newbie might be put off, so I tend to go with whether there is something I can help them with or even encourage them with.Quote by KitKat
I believe it starts the moment someone walks through the door. Rather than respond with the ritual "Hi, sit down and join in the banter we are all mad in here forget your real life" Respond by taking an interest in the person and asking questions. Not A/S/L what are you in to- I don't believe anyone should be asked for that information, Sensible social questions based on their post.
This gets people into the right frame of mind from the start, makes for a more interesting introduction, and, most importantly, gives people the opportuinity to get themselves known without the stresses of diving into miriads of threads.
I think (if I can remember that far back) this is what you did to me, Kat. You took an interest in me, along with some of the others and helped me out of my little old shell. And for that, I do thank you all
Quote by little gem
I'm having Deja Vous about this thread with plenty of others I've read over the last week. Can we all just stop whining and post some decent threads now!
i was just thinking that
:twisted:
right
how to get back to last years board
delete all members who've joined in 2004
ban all newbies
ban all new posts
see problem solved
Sex God
OK, well... seeing as this will be my... wait for it.......11569th post :eeek: I'm probably more guilty than anyone of making lots of crap posts . Of course you will all disagree with that and you will all tell me that every single one of my posts is a masterpiece that contributes without bounds to the everlasting beauty of this forum 8-) 8-) ... WHAT??? You're not going to tell me that.......???/ Let me tell you.... OH YES YOU ARE GOING TO TELL ME THAT :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :lol: :lol:
Ha hah hehehehehehehehe
Seriously.... when I found this forum and eventually got up the courage to register and start posting :uhoh: I posted as much as I could on as many threads as I could. In short, I was hooked :silly: . I didn't think much about what I was saying to be honest. I felt I was contributing something, even if it was crap . After what seemed like ages 
people actually started replying to me and this fuelled my posting even more :uhoh: . After a while I seemed to be making friends, more people were joining that I felt I had things in common with, in all sorts of ways. This was before munches were ever thought of so I wasn't ever anticipating ever meeting more than a few people, and I certainly never anticipated what people might think of me and my posts in real life :haha:
I figure when newbies are over-zealous that they are like me when I first joined..... excited, maybe a bit naive, and certainly meaning no harm :confused: ... then again, things have changed.... I can recognise a few, well more than a few, who post just to get noticed, to get meets ASAP, and to get enough posts to get an invite to a munch :roll: :roll: . This type of behaviour is going to happen. There is nothing we can do to stop it really. Asking questions as Kat says is a good way to intergrate newbies, but only if they want to be intergrated in the ways of REAL forum life :smug: , otherwise we just have to put up with their crap posts til they get bored and move on. Such is life.
I post less in serious threads now, and probably less in the GFZ-type threads too.... so why is my post count spiralling still? :shock: :shock: :shock: I obviously post more than I think I do - maybe I have a sleep-posting problem :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: . But I am more aware what I post now, maybe cos I'm a mod, maybe cos I'm not naive any more, I don't really know :? , but I'm still big headed enough to think that I contribute to this great forum :2fingers: :smug: . Some of the most crappest threads actually do contribute a lot to this forum - they show people for what they really are..... usually the type of "Crap" tells me whether someone is witty, humourous and someone I could have a laugh and a drink with in real life, or whether they are just a tosser after a fast fuck. I wouldn't want the crap posts to stop really, but it's the nature of the crap that is important :confused: .... is anyone still reading? :sleeping:
Anyways, I know what I mean, and before this goes down as one of my all time crappest posts, I'd better stop typing :roll: ..... blimey..... what was the question again?
:lol: :lol: :lol:
. Of course you will all disagree with that and you will all tell me that every single one of my posts is a masterpiece that contributes without bounds to the everlasting beauty of this forum 8-) 8-) ... WHAT??? You're not going to tell me that.......???/ Let me tell you.... OH YES YOU ARE GOING TO TELL ME THAT :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :lol: :lol: Ha hah hehehehehehehehe
Seriously.... when I found this forum and eventually got up the courage to register and start posting :uhoh: I posted as much as I could on as many threads as I could. In short, I was hooked :silly: . I didn't think much about what I was saying to be honest. I felt I was contributing something, even if it was crap
. After what seemed like ages people actually started replying to me and this fuelled my posting even more :uhoh: . After a while I seemed to be making friends, more people were joining that I felt I had things in common with, in all sorts of ways. This was before munches were ever thought of so I wasn't ever anticipating ever meeting more than a few people, and I certainly never anticipated what people might think of me and my posts in real life :haha: I figure when newbies are over-zealous that they are like me when I first joined..... excited, maybe a bit naive, and certainly meaning no harm :confused: ... then again, things have changed.... I can recognise a few, well more than a few, who post just to get noticed, to get meets ASAP, and to get enough posts to get an invite to a munch
:roll: :roll: . This type of behaviour is going to happen. There is nothing we can do to stop it really. Asking questions as Kat says is a good way to intergrate newbies, but only if they want to be intergrated in the ways of REAL forum life :smug: , otherwise we just have to put up with their crap posts til they get bored and move on. Such is life.I post less in serious threads now, and probably less in the GFZ-type threads too.... so why is my post count spiralling still? :shock: :shock: :shock: I obviously post more than I think I do - maybe I have a sleep-posting problem :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: . But I am more aware what I post now, maybe cos I'm a mod, maybe cos I'm not naive any more, I don't really know :? , but I'm still big headed enough to think that I contribute to this great forum :2fingers: :smug: . Some of the most crappest threads actually do contribute a lot to this forum - they show people for what they really are..... usually the type of "Crap" tells me whether someone is witty, humourous and someone I could have a laugh and a drink with in real life, or whether they are just a tosser after a fast fuck. I wouldn't want the crap posts to stop really, but it's the nature of the crap that is important :confused: .... is anyone still reading? :sleeping:
Anyways, I know what I mean, and before this goes down as one of my all time crappest posts, I'd better stop typing :roll: ..... blimey..... what was the question again?
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Sexlightened
This is just my thought and mine alone, but I get the feeling that a lot of people are trying to get noticed in the hope (THAS HOPE) of being moderated and after tonite in the chat room I feel the same even more and god help us if they are and it is just an opinion
and it is just an opinion ok if someone did 81 posts in there first week on here is that to much.....?
really like to know.. sorry fabio but u moaning again.. bout something what is not that important..
everyone who uses this site... look back when you started..everyone wrote load of shit when they started...when people say they dont write alot now.... why is that?.. cause there is more crap on the forum??? or is it like most things in life... the buzz dies down...
sorry fabio but theres been loads of talk this week about people who say this has been done before ..then show the link......and as you are known for saying that to people.... are you trying changing the subject abit... or that what im doing ???
really like to know.. sorry fabio but u moaning again.. bout something what is not that important..
everyone who uses this site... look back when you started..everyone wrote load of shit when they started...when people say they dont write alot now.... why is that?.. cause there is more crap on the forum??? or is it like most things in life... the buzz dies down...
sorry fabio but theres been loads of talk this week about people who say this has been done before ..then show the link......and as you are known for saying that to people.... are you trying changing the subject abit... or that what im doing ???
