judy,
You play safe by nobody's rules but your own. as far as i'm concerned(Paul) you haven't asked for anything out of the ordinary. I see no problem at all with your 'rules'
It's not as if it's an OTT request to phone a landline is it?
I'd just put this one down to experience and hopefully, your vision of loveliness will see the error of his ways and come crawling back to you.......
Paul and Susie (Paul)
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Heartbroken Tranny
Sex God
Quote by JudyTV
I am so pissed off annoyed doesn't even come close to it.
I have been communicating with this drop dead gorgeous male sex god that heaven graciously escorted to my PC screen via my advert and after a couple of quick exchanges of polite emails he sent me a pic of himself. This vision of Germanic loveliness is enchanting and looking for a TV (not cathode ray) to be taught the finer things of sexual awareness. Well, to be quite blunt I very quickly lost all sense of self control and all but told him I wanted to have his babies. Rebbecca hunni if you are reading this and are thinking about some sardonic quip regarding my age then don't even go there dear. Another couple of exchanges and a verbal agreement for drinkypoos was arranged ( dampness now begins to creep in around the lower abdomen) before any deep discussions of running off into the sunset with toothbrush and Ford Focus. Now folks I am a cautious sort of malegirl so I asked for his landline as a token of his esteem sincerity which I said I would gladly call to finalise the arrangements. I will NOT meet anyone with just a mobile number as it could be just anyones. I am quite prepared to give my number after I have contacted the other party via their own land line. That is my criteria and I made that abundantly clear from the very start. Lo and behold he now says he wont give me his landline until, in his words, "He knows I am ok". Now if anything, I am sure I come across as a genuine person and I am fairly well known on the forum and the chat room so to be confronted by this, I feel, is rather an insult. Huh, until he knows I am ok indeed. He doesn't have an add on here, he doesn't post in the forum and I have never seen him in the chat room but he has the nerve to say he will give me his phone number after he knows I am ok.
I have politely told him he has insulted me and I thought he was better than that and waved him a tearful farewell. So I am available yet again.
Tell me, am I wrong to get the hump here and have I potentially blown my future happiness with a sex creature sent to me by my maker just for the sake of a harsh self rule? Are my rules too harsh, are my standards too high, and is my criteria unacceptable. What would you have done? your views would indeed be appreciated here.
Life is such a bummer at times, no pun intended of course.
Judy TV :cry:
Your rules are your rules and his rules are his rules. I think you have a vastly better case than he does though because he can come in here and read for himself the high regard in which you are held, and if he knew your criteria from the outset he should have spoken up there and then if he wasn't happy with it. All the same, who knows, he might have just got cold feet for reasons you don't know about, so try not to feel aggrieved for too long and rise serenely above it all.
Are your criteria too demanding? Only you can answer that, but for myself I would say never lower your standards for anyone else... always be true to what you think is right for you. You have set your standards and settling for less will make you feel like you've cheated yourself. If the choice is to hold out for what you want or settle for what's offered at the moment, I'd say go for the former every time. Give yourself permission to do right by yourself, then say to yourself "Thank you, Judy, I deserve that."
Ice
Sex God
Stick to your guns Judy, everyone in here regularly knows you are "OK"...no, so much more than OK....he was definitely not "OK".
Mike.
Mike.
Judy,it is definately his loss!
He may look like some sex god,but when you met him he may have been the dullest person youve ever met in your whole life!!
Stick to your guns,certain rules are always there for good reasons even if it doesnt feel like it at the time.
Clare,xxx
He may look like some sex god,but when you met him he may have been the dullest person youve ever met in your whole life!!
Stick to your guns,certain rules are always there for good reasons even if it doesnt feel like it at the time.
Clare,xxx
You're away so if he does get in touch you won't be able to return his mail? Bloody good!!!!!!!
You made your rules clear (and by the way I think your rules are just common sense) and it's his loss if he now wishes to play by a different set of rules.
Judy hun, don't demean yourself by popping in to an internet cafe, that way he would be affecting your life in a negative way. Have a great time whatever you're doing, put him to the back of your mind, and when you get back, start afresh.
Sex gods are overrated anyway.
jules
xxx
You made your rules clear (and by the way I think your rules are just common sense) and it's his loss if he now wishes to play by a different set of rules.
Judy hun, don't demean yourself by popping in to an internet cafe, that way he would be affecting your life in a negative way. Have a great time whatever you're doing, put him to the back of your mind, and when you get back, start afresh.
Sex gods are overrated anyway.
jules
xxx
deep discussions of running off into the sunset with toothbrush and Ford Focus
Judy, i dont know if you mean to, and i may be slightly off topic, but the way you put things in your posts has to be the funniest use of words i have clapped my eyes on, you make me roll with laughter..
On a more serious note.. your safety and sanity is more important than some sex god, so just relax and keep to your own good standards, if he doesnt give you his number then theres probably a good reason for you not to bother with him anymore
Chin up
Russ
Judy, I'm an infrequent visitor to these hallowed portals but just wanted to say that every time I've been in the chatroom you've been a model of support and fun and someone with a great outlook so don't you change one bit!
You are one of those few people who may not agree with what others do all the time but respect that we are all individuals and each have a 'boat to float' and 9 times out of 10 your stance on any given issue is spot on ..... so although it may be difficult ... stick to your guns hun!
I doff my cap in your general direction
You are one of those few people who may not agree with what others do all the time but respect that we are all individuals and each have a 'boat to float' and 9 times out of 10 your stance on any given issue is spot on ..... so although it may be difficult ... stick to your guns hun!
I doff my cap in your general direction
Orgasminator
Stick to the rules that you feel comfortable with Judy :-)
But I will add... I dont have a land line, I decided to get rid of it when I realised that (a) I didnt need it to keep my broadband, and (b) no one ever rings my land line, and I never use it to ring anyone...
Now my mobile however is my "landline" it only ever leaves my side if I want some piece and quite... I have been known to use it in some strange in interesting places; such as in the toilet; while "on the job" (long story... the lass who rang still hasnt lived it down, lol); Half way through a photo shoot... while saying "lovely, just open your legs a little more" to which my mum on the other end said "I hear you're busy... I'll call you back later"
Also all my contact cards and my site direct everyone to my mobile... if there is one number than means anything to me... tis my mobi :-)
But I will add... I dont have a land line, I decided to get rid of it when I realised that (a) I didnt need it to keep my broadband, and (b) no one ever rings my land line, and I never use it to ring anyone...
Now my mobile however is my "landline" it only ever leaves my side if I want some piece and quite... I have been known to use it in some strange in interesting places; such as in the toilet; while "on the job" (long story... the lass who rang still hasnt lived it down, lol); Half way through a photo shoot... while saying "lovely, just open your legs a little more" to which my mum on the other end said "I hear you're busy... I'll call you back later"
Also all my contact cards and my site direct everyone to my mobile... if there is one number than means anything to me... tis my mobi :-)
Um, sorry to against the grain, but much as I agree with everyone else, that you shouldn't compromise your prrinciples, you have to consider his criteria, also.
Maybe he does not give out his landline to just anyone either? We all know you're not just anyone, Judy, but he doesn't. Not yet.
Maybe a call to his cell phone (having blocked your number, of course) would lead to more confidence, from him. Maybe he is daunted by the forums and the prospect of coming into 'your territory'.
Keep your principals. but allow him to keep his.
I would have (very carefully) just given it all a little more time.
{{{{{JudyTV}}}}} We all love you, hun. (You like m/f couples? ;-) )
Maybe he does not give out his landline to just anyone either? We all know you're not just anyone, Judy, but he doesn't. Not yet.
Maybe a call to his cell phone (having blocked your number, of course) would lead to more confidence, from him. Maybe he is daunted by the forums and the prospect of coming into 'your territory'.
Keep your principals. but allow him to keep his.
I would have (very carefully) just given it all a little more time.
{{{{{JudyTV}}}}} We all love you, hun. (You like m/f couples? ;-) )
Orgasminator
Oh Judy, Judy, Judy you must be gutted. You have done the right thing though. Hope you are ok.
Sex God
I'm going to echo Vix sentiment here.
If there's one thing I've learnt, it's that life is about negotiation.
You've asked this person to change their saftey rules without considering altering your own. Were you aware of his rules? Did you ask? (I'll assume you did, being the bright, level-headed person you are.)
Maybe he's had a previous experience that's been bad and is just a litle cautious.
Perhaps a better idea would be to exchange mobile numbers (if you haven't already) and indulge in some texting, just until you're both a little more comfortable with each other.
It does sound as though your excitement has maybe made you rush things a little and now they've ground to a halt you're kinda blaming him for it. If he's genuine (and i think maybe you're wondering about that yourself because you posted this), then maybe he's just got very nervous at the speed things are all you're a very strong, opinionated person and I'm betting that after the initial contact it was you that dictated the speed things moved at.
You could send him a link to your profile on here, although after posting this thread that may not be such a good idea.
If he wants to post a thread there are 100's of people here that have met you and can vouch for your integrity.
I know that there's a lot of maybes and perhapses here, but only you have spoken to this person, so only you have the "gut instinct" to go on. I'm not saying that you should compromise your own personal security, just that you may have been a little rash in dismissing him.
Oh and the link mentioned above is here.
If there's one thing I've learnt, it's that life is about negotiation.
You've asked this person to change their saftey rules without considering altering your own. Were you aware of his rules? Did you ask? (I'll assume you did, being the bright, level-headed person you are.)
Maybe he's had a previous experience that's been bad and is just a litle cautious.
Perhaps a better idea would be to exchange mobile numbers (if you haven't already) and indulge in some texting, just until you're both a little more comfortable with each other.
It does sound as though your excitement has maybe made you rush things a little and now they've ground to a halt you're kinda blaming him for it. If he's genuine (and i think maybe you're wondering about that yourself because you posted this), then maybe he's just got very nervous at the speed things are all you're a very strong, opinionated person and I'm betting that after the initial contact it was you that dictated the speed things moved at.
You could send him a link to your profile on here, although after posting this thread that may not be such a good idea.
If he wants to post a thread there are 100's of people here that have met you and can vouch for your integrity.I know that there's a lot of maybes and perhapses here, but only you have spoken to this person, so only you have the "gut instinct" to go on. I'm not saying that you should compromise your own personal security, just that you may have been a little rash in dismissing him.
Oh and the link mentioned above is here.
Sex God
he can come in here and read for himself the high regard in which you are held,
indeed he can! Judy not gen? pah! the very idea! t'is a sad story indeed, but sorry i had to laugh! what a way with words!
judy, i trust those who've had not yet had the pleasure of your company will have the opportunity once again to see just how genuine you are, in little over a fortnight! in the meantime, be good and stick to your guns. i hope your lovegod learns the error of his ways, and spread's a little marmite on your toast! ;-)
love n hugs n stuff
n x x x ;-)
Sex God
Tell you what, Judy..... seeing as he's such a sex god, I'll meet him, shag his brains out, and if he's genuine, I'll send you the crumbs that are left :grin: :grin: :grin:
Oh Judy, you have a wonderful way with words
On a more serious point tho, I would agree with Vix and Easy. He might not supply a landline because he is extra cautious, not a timewaster.
Must admit that I very rarely give out my home number - mainly because I have the girls here, but even if I took them out the equation for a moment, I still don't think I would. My home is my territory and I keep everything swinging related away from here. I know it sounds silly, but it kinda feels that even people on my landline are then in my territory. I am extremely protective of it.
So it now depends on your feelings with the landline taken out of this for now. How do you feel about him? If it is ONLY the landline thing that has put you off then maybe you should move your cute little stubborn ass and compromise slightly
How about calling his mobile, then arranging to just go for these 'drinkipoos' somewhere busy - see how you feel about him then. If after you have met him face to face for an evening, you still feel wary, then yes, back off - gut instinct is often the right one.
It seems such a shame to write him off just because of the landline - especially when you are talking sunsets and Ford Focuses 8-)
Failing that Blues plan sounds bluddy good :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
On a more serious point tho, I would agree with Vix and Easy. He might not supply a landline because he is extra cautious, not a timewaster.
Must admit that I very rarely give out my home number - mainly because I have the girls here, but even if I took them out the equation for a moment, I still don't think I would. My home is my territory and I keep everything swinging related away from here. I know it sounds silly, but it kinda feels that even people on my landline are then in my territory. I am extremely protective of it.
So it now depends on your feelings with the landline taken out of this for now. How do you feel about him? If it is ONLY the landline thing that has put you off then maybe you should move your cute little stubborn ass and compromise slightly
How about calling his mobile, then arranging to just go for these 'drinkipoos' somewhere busy - see how you feel about him then. If after you have met him face to face for an evening, you still feel wary, then yes, back off - gut instinct is often the right one.It seems such a shame to write him off just because of the landline - especially when you are talking sunsets and Ford Focuses 8-)
Failing that Blues plan sounds bluddy good :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Judy! Big Big Big hugs!
I do indeed feel that it is HIS loss!
But I do also have to agree with Vix and Easy.
He also is just taking precautions. In fact it is perhaps to his credit that he is being careful.
You each have your own rules which it is correct to stick to. However if you had conversed for a few more weeks perhaps you both may have felt a little more comfortable to relax those rules slightly.
But - at the end of the day - it is your gut feeling about this which is important! If it made you feel uncomfortatble in any way, then you are 100% correct in your actions!
Hugs and kisses,
Alex x x x
I do indeed feel that it is HIS loss!
But I do also have to agree with Vix and Easy.
He also is just taking precautions. In fact it is perhaps to his credit that he is being careful.
You each have your own rules which it is correct to stick to. However if you had conversed for a few more weeks perhaps you both may have felt a little more comfortable to relax those rules slightly.
But - at the end of the day - it is your gut feeling about this which is important! If it made you feel uncomfortatble in any way, then you are 100% correct in your actions!
Hugs and kisses,
Alex x x x
Quote by JudyTV
I will sit on my beach and watch the tide come in and go out and most likely patiently wait for the next tram.
Judy TV.
I thought you were off to the village, not Blackpool?
Hugs Judy - have a great time!
Sex God
awwww sorry to hear about what happened....the way i look at it is if you don't have standards yourself then you can't complain about anyone elses......
on the number giving debate.... i always give people my mobile since i only ever use my landline for the computer, but i explain that to people...and if they still want my landline number then i give it to them...
anyway if he didn't realise what a good thing he had going anyway judy... then that is his loss honey!!!!!
sean xxxxxxx
on the number giving debate.... i always give people my mobile since i only ever use my landline for the computer, but i explain that to people...and if they still want my landline number then i give it to them...
anyway if he didn't realise what a good thing he had going anyway judy... then that is his loss honey!!!!!
sean xxxxxxx
Sexlightened
Judy, it's always better to be safe than sorry. Good luck for the future 
You stick to your guns.
The only way to stay safe in this world is to make your own set of rules and stick to them
I know its hard sometimes when rejection stares you in the face but what the f**k get up shake your self down and move on.
He aint worth it.
You did good matey. Stick to your own rules.
The only way to stay safe in this world is to make your own set of rules and stick to them
I know its hard sometimes when rejection stares you in the face but what the f**k get up shake your self down and move on.
He aint worth it.
You did good matey. Stick to your own rules.
I once entered a photo on a gaming site, they wanted us to hold a sign with the name of the game (Droid Arena) to make a wrelcome page outta the winning pic. All were displayed and we had to vote for the winner.
Typically, I did it naked. Holding a banner sign to obscure my nipples.
One response on the thread with the votes:
.....the woman in picture 3, if it is indeed a woman, degrading herself....
Aah, the angst of text based gamers.
Typically, I did it naked. Holding a banner sign to obscure my nipples.
One response on the thread with the votes:
.....the woman in picture 3, if it is indeed a woman, degrading herself....
Aah, the angst of text based gamers.
Well I personally am absolutely appalled at Judy's decision!! :jagsatwork:
A Ford Focus for goodness sake? Have you seen the depreciation!! :haha: :haha: :haha:
Oh I'm sorry, but it made me chuckle.
Judy, only you know exactly what was said, I think gut instinct has as much to do with this as actual rules, sounds a little to me like you already had alarm bells ringing softly...
Always go with your instincts, I suspect if you'd felt happier about things then you would have been more inclined to gently bend your rules.
Also think a "person to person" mobile phone chat is probably as good a way of finding out as much as possible with as little risk as possible personally.
Good luck with it all anyway, if it was meant to be then it still will be. :thumbup:
A Ford Focus for goodness sake? Have you seen the depreciation!! :haha: :haha: :haha:
Oh I'm sorry, but it made me chuckle.
Judy, only you know exactly what was said, I think gut instinct has as much to do with this as actual rules, sounds a little to me like you already had alarm bells ringing softly...
Always go with your instincts, I suspect if you'd felt happier about things then you would have been more inclined to gently bend your rules.
Also think a "person to person" mobile phone chat is probably as good a way of finding out as much as possible with as little risk as possible personally.
Good luck with it all anyway, if it was meant to be then it still will be. :thumbup:
Sex God
Judy, his loss without a doubt.
Speaking as one without much experience of these things isn't there a way of meeting in the middle on this sort of thing or does it have to be one party sticking their neck out?
Surely someone on here must have a method that works. Sorry that's about as useful as a cuppa tea at the rodeo!
Speaking as one without much experience of these things isn't there a way of meeting in the middle on this sort of thing or does it have to be one party sticking their neck out?
Surely someone on here must have a method that works. Sorry that's about as useful as a cuppa tea at the rodeo!
