Sort of along the lines of how do you pick your victims, this is more how people approach others.
This is just from personal experience and it would interest me to hear other peoples views on it.
What kind of contact really rubs you up the wrong way? For instance, there is one guy in the chatroom who constantly whispers. This started about 4 months ago, he was great at first, chatty, friendly, but what put me off was he was only 2 miles away, a bit close to home for me and I recognised him from his pics.
We got on well and I gave him my mobile, have spoken on the phone a couple of times too. When it first started I had a partner and needed to have approval before playing, which he knew, I also have a lot of study to do for important exams, which he knows and don’t like playing on nights where I have to work the next day, which he knows and a lot of my weekends are busy with site stuff which he knows
Now I constantly get text messages with a few words saying ‘my turn’ or ‘when do I get a go’ now I don’t think I have turned into a fair ground ride. This kind of text really gets my back up and he is really pushy.
I am not leading him on, I told him in the beginning it would be a few months before we got chance to meet if we ever did. I think its more the arrogance of the texts that bothers me the ‘have me for tea’ etc.
Along the same lines I had a pm from a couple when I was with my partner bluntly saying. ‘First we want you hubby (which he wasn’t) and then if we like him we may want you’ This got deleted without reply.
Sorry waffling on here. So to the question would this kind of messaging put you off or is it just me. If someone approached you in this way would you consider playing.
Sorry if I am not being clear here, feel free to ask me what I mean if I can explain it better I will
Earthy xx
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How approaches are made
Warming the Bed
Sometimes it can be a fine line between keen and pushy! But if it was me then I'd think it was pushy and go right off the idea of meeting them.
If someone has explained that they won't be free for a while then it's fine to keep in contact but not to keep pushing for that initial meet.
If someone has explained that they won't be free for a while then it's fine to keep in contact but not to keep pushing for that initial meet.
Ohhhhh i have a list and now im going to sound a picky cow.... 
What turns me off?
Whisperers - If they have not had a decent conversation with me or even said hello... They usually start a whisper with "hi, nice pics, are you up for a meet now?" (thats usually the more polite ones - i wont go in to the cruder ones).
"Im only 5 miles away"
"You wont regret it" or, "you dont know what you're missing"
Winks and obvious copy and pastes - omg i hate them and delete them on sight.
Name droppers or name and shamers - i dont care if the person was a bunny boiler, to do it in main makes me question that persons motives and discretion.
I think thats enough to be going on with ... :lol:
What turns me off?
Whisperers - If they have not had a decent conversation with me or even said hello... They usually start a whisper with "hi, nice pics, are you up for a meet now?" (thats usually the more polite ones - i wont go in to the cruder ones).
"Im only 5 miles away"
"You wont regret it" or, "you dont know what you're missing"
Winks and obvious copy and pastes - omg i hate them and delete them on sight.
Name droppers or name and shamers - i dont care if the person was a bunny boiler, to do it in main makes me question that persons motives and discretion.
I think thats enough to be going on with ... :lol:
Earthy hun, I think there definately is a particular approach or 'acceptable way to go about things' - but that will differ from person to person 
Flippant texts like that or anything that feels pushy would have had his/her number deleted weeks ago
The kind of contact that really rubs me up the wrong way is the typical one-liner quick shag pm...usually from someone I dont know & who hasnt read my profile..or from someone I do know who will already know that playing is not on the cards.
What I do like is the respectful 'I wondered if you might fancy going to XXXXX with me?, would you like to come back to our room after the Munch?...I'm up your way and if you fancy a coffee on a social basis (and mean it) let me know' type approach. 'Fancy a shag luv' will get you absolutely nowhere, nor will 'I could show you what you're missing' and 'go on, you'll love it, its the opportunity of a lifetime' type spiel. Sometimes it could simply be how something is worded...or that we just dont read each other well (which to me means we aint gonna 'click' anyway) but I'm definately like you in the 'dont like the idea that they see you as a piece of meat' camp. :thumbup: If their approach gives even a hint of that, its a no-go area!
Masquerade wrote:
Indeed :thumbup:
Flippant texts like that or anything that feels pushy would have had his/her number deleted weeks ago
The kind of contact that really rubs me up the wrong way is the typical one-liner quick shag pm...usually from someone I dont know & who hasnt read my profile..or from someone I do know who will already know that playing is not on the cards.
What I do like is the respectful 'I wondered if you might fancy going to XXXXX with me?, would you like to come back to our room after the Munch?...I'm up your way and if you fancy a coffee on a social basis (and mean it) let me know' type approach. 'Fancy a shag luv' will get you absolutely nowhere, nor will 'I could show you what you're missing' and 'go on, you'll love it, its the opportunity of a lifetime' type spiel. Sometimes it could simply be how something is worded...or that we just dont read each other well (which to me means we aint gonna 'click' anyway) but I'm definately like you in the 'dont like the idea that they see you as a piece of meat' camp. :thumbup: If their approach gives even a hint of that, its a no-go area!
Masquerade wrote:
If someone has explained that they won't be free for a while then it's fine to keep in contact but not to keep pushing for that initial meet.
Indeed :thumbup:
"my turn" sort of texts are distasteful and unnecessarily crude. I'd tell him to fuck off then ignore him from now on.
Alsorts of things put me off. i'm told I'm too fussy.
examples:
Had been keeping in touch with a guy for some time. We both managed to find a time and day that suited us but he added "if you play your cards right".
If i what????? Delete!
Recently, I cancelled a meet to do something else instead. the guy was ok about it and we exchanged a couple of texts about meeting up another day.
Later, in the chatroom, he made an open comment about me "messing with people's emotions". Delete!!
Being told "your loss" or "i've met loads from here - ask them" really doesn't float my boat.
If I am too fussy then it's with good reason. i've had to learn the hard way.
A lot of people are just damn rude! I got a PM in reply for an ad I used to have. It was a pretty decent length, well written and included a face pic, as requested. Looked great till I actually read the bloody thing and realised the first paragraph was his opinion on my smoking and how abhorrent and disgusting it is - BUT - (bless him!) - he was willing to bring 20 packets of chewing gum and deal with it. Gee, thanks pal!
Wanking over my pics, imagining me with your wife and general eye-rolling shite like that does nowt for me.
I'm starting to wonder what does!
Alsorts of things put me off. i'm told I'm too fussy.
examples:
Had been keeping in touch with a guy for some time. We both managed to find a time and day that suited us but he added "if you play your cards right".
If i what????? Delete!
Recently, I cancelled a meet to do something else instead. the guy was ok about it and we exchanged a couple of texts about meeting up another day.
Later, in the chatroom, he made an open comment about me "messing with people's emotions". Delete!!
Being told "your loss" or "i've met loads from here - ask them" really doesn't float my boat.
If I am too fussy then it's with good reason. i've had to learn the hard way.
A lot of people are just damn rude! I got a PM in reply for an ad I used to have. It was a pretty decent length, well written and included a face pic, as requested. Looked great till I actually read the bloody thing and realised the first paragraph was his opinion on my smoking and how abhorrent and disgusting it is - BUT - (bless him!) - he was willing to bring 20 packets of chewing gum and deal with it. Gee, thanks pal!
Wanking over my pics, imagining me with your wife and general eye-rolling shite like that does nowt for me.
I'm starting to wonder what does!
Sex God
The things that rub me up the wrong way are........
1)Uninvited whispers
2)Men in couples who think you're going to change your mind about what you want because their lady is gorgeous.
3)Anyone being too pushy in any way. I'm a typical Arian and love the challenge and the chase.
Love
Fire xx
1)Uninvited whispers
2)Men in couples who think you're going to change your mind about what you want because their lady is gorgeous.
3)Anyone being too pushy in any way. I'm a typical Arian and love the challenge and the chase.
Love
Fire xx
Altough, Im not in the scene and do not meet anyone from here ever (besides socials/munches) it doesnt stop peeeps from making approaches.. some amusing, some not so..
I have a couple that constantly chase me around the chatrooms... they dont realise I leave one to go to another because of their persistant whispering and pestering etc. An yes, I have told them Im not in the scene, doesnt seem to sink in :?
Other's thats a pain is *I live a few miles away from you, I can come round now*, :? NO you cant!!
But *I'm vvvw hung* YES, you will be if you come near my home :? :?
I dislike pushiness, players and those who play mind games...
Have another member who thinks Im going to change my mind about swinging and makes approaches to me in person that I feel uncomfortable with (only see at munches) :? :?
As for pms.....hehe >>I do get the usual complimentary cock shot>> couples who have read my profile and know Im not in the scene who tell me their wife fancies me (how and why I have no idea), >> some single peristent guys (made friends with some and keep in touch, knowing we will never meet - nice and respectful).
Then the odd pillock who asks WTF are you on this site for if your not going to meet... which does tickle me to some extent>> why tell me, why waste time pm'ing me??
The pm's that I reply to are those that are respectful and polite, have taken the time to write something interesting, ask how I find the site etc, who have taken the time to read my posts in the forums and my profile etc etc and of course the amusing pm's (who can resist answering those).
Ive made some nice online friends with some of these peeps...
:) :) That and munches I suppose is what keeps me here...
xanaisx
I have a couple that constantly chase me around the chatrooms... they dont realise I leave one to go to another because of their persistant whispering and pestering etc. An yes, I have told them Im not in the scene, doesnt seem to sink in
:? Other's thats a pain is *I live a few miles away from you, I can come round now*, :? NO you cant!!
But *I'm vvvw hung* YES, you will be if you come near my home :? :?
I dislike pushiness, players and those who play mind games...
Have another member who thinks Im going to change my mind about swinging and makes approaches to me in person that I feel uncomfortable with (only see at munches) :? :?
As for pms.....hehe >>I do get the usual complimentary cock shot>> couples who have read my profile and know Im not in the scene who tell me their wife fancies me (how and why I have no idea), >> some single peristent guys (made friends with some and keep in touch, knowing we will never meet - nice and respectful).
Then the odd pillock who asks WTF are you on this site for if your not going to meet... which does tickle me to some extent>> why tell me, why waste time pm'ing me??
The pm's that I reply to are those that are respectful and polite, have taken the time to write something interesting, ask how I find the site etc, who have taken the time to read my posts in the forums and my profile etc etc and of course the amusing pm's (who can resist answering those).
Ive made some nice online friends with some of these peeps...
:) :) That and munches I suppose is what keeps me here...xanaisx
Sex God
Quote by anais
But *I'm vvvw hung* YES, you will be if you come near my home
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Wonderful, anais! Must be what they call "gallows humour"!
the guys who meet you, your the best thing since sliced bread then arrange meets again only to chicken out wtf is that all about once or twice yes circumstances can happen but 8 times in a row (even im not that daft) if ya dont want to meet again why ask in the first place
wispers saying hi
the common revenge ones "you dont know what ya missing"
the ones who say "i dunno how your hubby keeps his hands off you" quite easy he has to see me and put up with me on a morning
the obviously pushy ones push me n push orf
n the sort who sit there quietly never telling you they want to meet you, how the feck we supposed to know after all we aint mind readers dont be shy ya mother wasnt
rant over now
in edit ooh the quote button has moved
wispers saying hi
the common revenge ones "you dont know what ya missing"
the ones who say "i dunno how your hubby keeps his hands off you" quite easy he has to see me and put up with me on a morning
the obviously pushy ones push me n push orf
n the sort who sit there quietly never telling you they want to meet you, how the feck we supposed to know after all we aint mind readers dont be shy ya mother wasnt
rant over now
in edit ooh the quote button has moved
Quote by earthchild
Now I constantly get text messages with a few words saying ‘my turn’ or ‘when do I get a go’ now I don’t think I have turned into a fair ground ride.
Earthy xx
if not for the fact he was so close i had someone who says that to me but dont think its the same person wat am i a donkey ride or summit lol
Quote by MikeNorth
But *I'm vvvw hung* YES, you will be if you come near my home
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Wonderful, anais! Must be what they call "gallows humour"!
we've covered this before but don't forget the "I'm a heavy cummer!!".... I'm like..
FFS so what - means more to flippin clean up! Quote by dekntan
Now I constantly get text messages with a few words saying ‘my turn’ or ‘when do I get a go’ now I don’t think I have turned into a fair ground ride.
Earthy xx
if not for the fact he was so close i had someone who says that to me but dont think its the same person wat am i a donkey ride or summit lol
ah but you do know him lol
oooh the quote button has moved so has the profile and pm ones
Tend to agree with what everyone's said here so far.
We've got the auto-response on the winks now, so don't get bothered with them.
It's easier to say what we do like really:
We like to see that someone's obviously read our profile or ad, recognise we're on the same wavelength, and then taken the time to write a personal email to us.
Any half-arsed attempt at contact tends to get a half-arsed reply from us! lol!
We've got the auto-response on the winks now, so don't get bothered with them.
It's easier to say what we do like really:
We like to see that someone's obviously read our profile or ad, recognise we're on the same wavelength, and then taken the time to write a personal email to us.
Any half-arsed attempt at contact tends to get a half-arsed reply from us! lol!
Quote by earthchild
Now I constantly get text messages with a few words saying ‘my turn’ or ‘when do I get a go’ now I don’t think I have turned into a fair ground ride.
Earthy xx
if not for the fact he was so close i had someone who says that to me but dont think its the same person wat am i a donkey ride or summit lol
ah but you do know him lol
oooh the quote button has moved so has the profile and pm ones
oooh is it who i think it is???????? the B.I.G????
Quote by dekntan
Now I constantly get text messages with a few words saying ‘my turn’ or ‘when do I get a go’ now I don’t think I have turned into a fair ground ride.
Earthy xx
if not for the fact he was so close i had someone who says that to me but dont think its the same person wat am i a donkey ride or summit lol
ah but you do know him lol
oooh the quote button has moved so has the profile and pm ones
oooh is it who i think it is???????? the B.I.G????
Yep
uch:
Sexpert
my worst chat up is
"i know you dont want single males but........"
WTF?!
"i know you dont want single males but........"
WTF?!
Not had any approaces by pm but in the chat room i've had
In the main room off a single bi male
Get you cock out goose
eh
get ya cock out
errrr no !!!
why
ffs lol
i dont wana
then he left
and tonight off a single fem in whisper
stand up
(i ignore)
you naked
no im topples lol dont do naked here
ok bye
this is a first for me in chat being directed by a fem (unless it was in jest by frinds) i was taken aback like a rabbit in the head lights
In the main room off a single bi male
Get you cock out goose
eh
get ya cock out
errrr no !!!
why
ffs lol
i dont wana
then he left
and tonight off a single fem in whisper
stand up
(i ignore)
you naked
no im topples lol dont do naked here
ok bye
this is a first for me in chat being directed by a fem (unless it was in jest by frinds) i was taken aback like a rabbit in the head lights
Sex God
Quote by earthchild
Now I constantly get text messages with a few words saying ‘my turn’ or ‘when do I get a go’ now I don’t think I have turned into a fair ground ride.
Earthy xx
if not for the fact he was so close i had someone who says that to me but dont think its the same person wat am i a donkey ride or summit lol
ah but you do know him lol
oooh the quote button has moved so has the profile and pm ones
oooh is it who i think it is???????? the B.I.G????
Yep
aw i got person did confirm for a social i had done in december any at work 1 day fone rings "hi r you on the site ,me yup,,,,"you sent me your number"did i "yes .........something about a meet in dec" me yes that was december fot the social " i just wondered as you have updated your add what you are doing ton.......click .yes i hung up cant be arsed with poo like that i give number out for poeple who had either got lost or to say cant come ,neither which this person had done,wipsa ha ate them in chat and why do they always think they are speaking to the female, 
Quote by northeastcoupleuk
Now I constantly get text messages with a few words saying ‘my turn’ or ‘when do I get a go’ now I don’t think I have turned into a fair ground ride.
Earthy xx
if not for the fact he was so close i had someone who says that to me but dont think its the same person wat am i a donkey ride or summit lol
ah but you do know him lol
oooh the quote button has moved so has the profile and pm ones
oooh is it who i think it is???????? the B.I.G????
Yep
aw i got person did confirm for a social i had done in december any at work 1 day fone rings "hi r you on the site ,me yup,,,,"you sent me your number"did i "yes .........something about a meet in dec" me yes that was december fot the social " i just wondered as you have updated your add what you are doing ton.......click .yes i hung up cant be arsed with poo like that i give number out for poeple who had either got lost or to say cant come ,neither which this person had done,wipsa ha ate them in chat and why do they always think they are speaking to the female,can see a pattern emerging lol witch hunt for the B.I.G :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
