How do people generally feel about married men going alone? (with permission)

This is one that really has my curiosity, so my wife recently gave permission for me to start swinging (I did give her plenty of opportunities to change her mind as I'd hate to upset our relationship but she's very supportive) she even helps me out, but it's not something I see very often on the various websites, initially I thought it would be a bit of a bonus to set me apart, being in the same boat as it were with respecting partners, discretion etc. Now I'm not so sure how people really feel about it? Of course I'm not expecting instant magic to happen and it is all fairly recent so it's not impatience, more well just wanting to know how I'm generally going to be viewed within the community I've longed to join for a long time (oh and trust me if anyone does answer I'll leave your DM's alone unless asked otherwise lol, from what I've read people can at times be a bit pushy, I'd really rather not embarrass myself badgering anyone not interested in me) take care all x

When we meet a single guy at a club we have no idea if he's married or not. Unless he brings the subject up why should we.

It's probable you will appeal to some couples / single females and not at all appeal to some couples and single females because of your status.

Ok when i joined this site many moons ago i did so with the permission of my husband. We had an open marriage that was built on trust. We both had ' extra marital ' relationships. These dalliances boosted both our egos and enhanced our sex life. We were honest with each other and the only rule was it was kept out of the general public eye and not bought into the home. In later life my husband developed prostate cancer so his sex life and ours together was stunted somewhat. I was encouraged to continue to swing and enjoy life so i did. Over the years i have seen the stigma married guys on here swinging alone have to carry because they are seen as cheats. Me being a married woman was put into a different category I was a ' prize' to some and often asked if i was cheating on my husband and would i wear my wedding ring etc as this is what the guy got off on, i found it very off putting i must say. Where some may well be less than honest within their relationships and are cheating there are some who are here for the fun that cannot be given at home for whatever reason. Lets face it we are only here to borrow or share someone for pleasure, swinging isn't a dating site so what does it matter if you are married single or part of a couple as long as you are all happy.

Thank you both very much for the replies, so some couples don't care and some see people like myself as cheats, that does clear it up a little more, personally I'm always keen to point out my wife will confirm she's happy but it isn't nice to be viewed like that but it is understandable too, loz you're reply is so wonderfully detailed and personal thank you for sharing so much 😊 I personally love the trust the wife and I have in each other and having the ability to ask her speaks volumes about our relationship much as your situation does for yours, what attracted me to the lifestyle is being the type of man I am is I'd often find myself vibing with strangers to the point enjoying each others bodies felt like a natural extension but I'd always stop it and conciquently either loose potential friendships or have to keep existing friends at a distance with this awkward tension, so then I thought why not just ask her? To me if I can get my foot in the door it means I can just enjoy these potential connections that I keep missing out on, happily since letting a couple of friends know they've sheepishly expressed an interest so that was nice to hear, I can now let people into my life and enjoy my friendships to the fullest, I'd love for my wife to join me in this but she's not (yet) interested but we have had a few really good conversations about the potential future, I'm aware it's not 'normal' for a traditionally masculine man but I don't generally have a type, I have a 'vibe' instead, if it's there, it's there and very quickly I'll become attracted, if you've made it this far thank you and well done, bit of a novel I know 😆

I am single and in the past have been accused of being married or with someone. I tell the truth, but it’s not always believed. Recently I have met a married couple a few times and the woman has been trying to catch me out. It’s got to the stage I have actually told her that if I had a woman, I would be honest, but it’s really none of her business. I think the problem is that lots of guys lie and are not honest and say they have their wives approval when their wife is at home and none the wiser.

I always ask if they have any questions in messages, I do certainly mean any, from kinks to what I'm OK to do but I always expect and willingly, actually keen to get them to meet my wife in person or to confirm and build a rapour but my messages can be long if I'm not careful so im trying my best to keep my messages readable, I just leave it as 'any questions' I hate having my integrity questioned (but won't let on) so I don't and won't lie, I've never done Internet dating until now so feeling accused isn't nice and I'm not used to it, I'll get over it, just a transition period, I feel like I'm being lumped in with the chancers at times, I'm a bit analogue for this world, my wife is even happy to come with me with our wedding pictures if needs be but to put that in a message seems a bit desperate, it's hard to explain your position while not looking beggy in a message. Now in real life everything is golden, analogue man in a digital world trying to figure it all out atm, the thing is as a man not bringing a woman we're ten a penny so to stand out won't be easy and that's fine by me, I like earning what I want, I just don't like being lumped in with the chancers, it does look like I've got an unusual break soon BUT I still won't be happy being viewed like the rest of the dishonest temporary (in this world) blokes, also luckily it turns out I've got a good few female friends that since I've mentioned my new arrangement have confessed they're into me lol, it is kind of nice to know people that know me have secretly been interested for a while lol, that's nice for my self esteem but really I want a social group of people that'll socialise and if things get sexy just roll with it, if it doesn't it's just a good social, my sex drive isn't huge but I do love to allow natural progression to happen when the vibes right, I'm a loving man to many and that's it, swinging to me is just not being awkward when the sexual tension happens between friends and it does happen all the time

Great subject. My view is best to be upfront , open and honest. There's no point trying to paint a different picture, by masquerading as something your not. As its going to come out in the wash and be discovered at some point. Which does not sit well with anyone.

Hence my profile status is married, as being upfront and not playing the game of trying to hoodwink anyone.

There are a lot of pushy , dare I say desperate males on the site and not everyone being open, upfront or reliable.

So I understand why couples and females view things with a questioning eye, and its right to do so. I also understand, the generic view on married males as "cheating" but someone else wife is a "prize" , its just the way human nature and general society think. Is that right or not, its a big question, but currently that where it sits.

For me I've been very comfortable without penetrative sex for many years as my partner is not able to. However am fast approaching sixty and aware things could stop working. Or health issues arise (unplanned, but you never know, what's around the corner, as we have learnt) which may result in me not being able to ever again. Hence joining SW, as not interested in a dating site , as never going to leave my wife.

Its a compromise, but hopefully with right connection will work out well for everyone. I wont push anything, as at the end of the day, a chat and a glass of wine, is a great day 😊

You will see from my profile that I am single, despite being married. I am very clear though that I am married. I don’t feel it is fair to those looking to make out that my profile is a couple.

Am I being honest or ensuring that I am treated as a time waster?

It's funny how many people don't like to judge all sorts of things these days but when it comes to married men that's all forgotten and they pile in without knowing any facts. Fact - both men and women cheat. Fact - some relationships are loving but sexless. Fact - some married women 'cheat'. Fact - some married men 'cheat'. Fact - some married people just need something physical that their partners can no longer provide. What are they supposed to do?

On the back of this thread and taking all into consideration I have now changed my profile to read that I am in fact married. Once in conversation with a lady or a couple I would always 'come clean' very quickly but I was always having to sense when the time was right and perhaps sometimes I got it wrong and was accused of leading people on..it certainly was not meant that way. This new found honesty means I will probably get my profile looked at less as couples will have their filters on or my messages will not get a second glance but those are the risks of being honest to a point I guess. For want of a better phrase 'you win some and you lose a whole lot more' !! But for those that stay interested then at least they know from the off and we're all playing to the same tune !

Many moons ago I did indeed cheat on my ex wife but since then I have always tried to be Ethically Non-Monogamous. So far I have managed to resist the temptation to knowingly play with ladies who are being secretive. I'm no angle so I most certainly don't judge, its just not for me.

Besides, one of my biggest turn-ons if fucking a married woman knowing that hubby is fully aware or watching.

Quote by osemlover

It's funny how many people don't like to judge all sorts of things but when it comes to married men that's all forgotten and they pile in without knowing the facts. Fact - both men and women cheat. Fact - some relationships are loving but sexless. Fact - some married women 'cheat'. Fact - some married men 'cheat'. Fact - some married people just need something physical that their partners can no longer provide. What are they supposed to do?

Well said.. Those are facts and people can make their own choices and judgements on that.

We just enjoy meeting married or attached lads for fun as it has a risk element ! Nothing better than knowing a lad is married but daren’t ask his wife to do something he’s wanting to do , but dare ask my wife ! Even little things like my wife dressing up for them or been tied up and blindfold is a massive thing to some men . Oh , did I say , we love it too !

Glad some couples Qui 2345 see the thrill in it , however some very judgemental on the subject, I’ve had a number of female friends both married and single who know I’m married and accepted it’s sexual fun and very exciting

We love meeting married lads , love the thought of them going home afterwards , with my wife’s juices all over theirs ! Don’t mind them calling at all !

We love to have a naughty night away every term (Jayne is a teacher)

Last time we were staying local and bumped into her best friend husband in the bar, Jayne has been flirting which was helped by her short summer dress. Having had a few glasses of prosecco, Jayne didn't really think of the consequences when she allowed him to see up her dress as she adjusted the fastening on her boots.

She feels guilty but knows he has probably wanked about seeing her pussy lips separated by her little white gstring

We love meeting local and not so local married guys , my wife likes the fact they are with her and not their wives . It’s the excitement of seeing them out and about after too !

I think like all things some people will like married people, some won't and some won't mind either way. The main point I think is that people are honest, ultimately whatever your status and motivations we are all here to find that little bit of something that you can't find in 'everyday life'

I state very early in my profile that I am married and that my wife does not know, its up to other people if that is an issue or not.

First of all i am single now for few years i always played around when i was married, i did try to convince my ex Mrs to be more open minded but wouldn't hear of it and would never do oral and sex is something dirty she would have to put up with every few months and usually at the last minute would just say no. So i found sexy times with other people and that went on for years, i know cause i tried to "get permission" she would be suspicious i was having an affair which i never did it was only ever 1 off's eventually we split and divorced. So the reason i am adding this to the debate is not all men are "cheating" just for the sake of it, some need to do it to make life bearable and feel wanted, not all but most of the people on here are just looking for like minded people for some sort of sexual contact who care's if they married it's them taking the risks, your just borrowing them for sex not looking for life partner there is dating sites for that