Can I Verify you as being a great guy and an understanding one.
Oh yes I do know you so can I put my tick in the box now.
medic_1 aka (Your Grandad)
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ideas for verifying members as genuine
Seems like some people are unaware of what verification actually means, Being verified or having verified pictures means exactly that, you’ve verified that your who you say you are, it’s doesn’t verify you meet anyone? or plan on meeting anyone, it only verifies that your a couple, single male or single female. WE think a lot of people are mixing verification up with feedback systems, the two can be connected but they aren’t the same thing.
Someone posted about another site using photo verification, again this doesn’t verify you meet anyone, but it does help verify that the pictures you upload on your profile actually do belong to you.
Someone posted about another site using photo verification, again this doesn’t verify you meet anyone, but it does help verify that the pictures you upload on your profile actually do belong to you.
In general life we meet people we make friends surely we don’t base our judgement on what others have said. We must form our own opinion on people.
Say for example you were blind you would have to make a choice based on responses that one has said and rely on gut reaction then.
That is how I see people I go in blind and make my own opinion from conversing with them I don't think you could ever rely on others making up your mind on people
Say for example you were blind you would have to make a choice based on responses that one has said and rely on gut reaction then.
That is how I see people I go in blind and make my own opinion from conversing with them I don't think you could ever rely on others making up your mind on people
Sex God
if verification does come in I have no wish to take part in the popularity competition that can be scud by elegances
those who know me know what I am about those who don't take some time to get to know me
I'm me, myself and I
enough said
those who know me know what I am about those who don't take some time to get to know me
I'm me, myself and I
enough said
Sexlightened
This site, helped us on to our first meet, but we very rarly go on it for one reason and on reason only.
No validations
Lets just say SDC ticks all the boxes
No validations
Lets just say SDC ticks all the boxes
Sex God
Quote by Deviants
Seems like some people are unaware of what verification actually means, Being verified or having verified pictures means exactly that, you’ve verified that your who you say you are, it’s doesn’t verify you meet anyone? or plan on meeting anyone, it only verifies that your a couple, single male or single female. WE think a lot of people are mixing verification up with feedback systems, the two can be connected but they aren’t the same thing.
Someone posted about another site using photo verification, again this doesn’t verify you meet anyone, but it does help verify that the pictures you upload on your profile actually do belong to you.
the opening poster took it in that direction.... from there first post
Quote by Kff30
i would like to see some sort of system on here where members who have met can leave feedback for each other which can been seen by every one when reading profiles i beilive this would cut down on a lot of the time wasters from arangeing meets and then letting ppl down
Quote by Theladyisaminx
In general life we meet people we make friends surely we don’t base our judgement on what others have said. We must form our own opinion on people.
Say for example you were blind you would have to make a choice based on responses that one has said and rely on gut reaction then.
That is how I see people I go in blind and make my own opinion from conversing with them I don't think you could ever rely on others making up your mind on people
would you buy a plasma tv fram eBay from a seller with only 3 feedback which are all negative?
would you visit a swingers club that had 50 reviews and 48 were bad?
a green tick verifying you are a couple, a single female or a single male should never be a bad thing, yes it isn't fool proof but its better than having nothing. Don't agree with feedback systems though as its open to abuse and isnt very discreet.
Sex God
Quote by Cossie
This site, helped us on to our first meet, but we very rarly go on it for one reason and on reason only.
No validations
can I ask how validations has helped you.... just curious, because maybe we can see your side of the debate.. its a serious question...
me personally I don't see why every site should be a generic copy of every other, as you say SH got you your first meet, so it must have worked in some way for you as it is?
Quote by Deviants
In general life we meet people we make friends surely we don’t base our judgement on what others have said. We must form our own opinion on people.
Say for example you were blind you would have to make a choice based on responses that one has said and rely on gut reaction then.
That is how I see people I go in blind and make my own opinion from conversing with them I don't think you could ever rely on others making up your mind on people
would you buy a plasma tv fram eBay from a seller with only 3 feedback which are all negative?
would you visit a swingers club that had 50 reviews and 48 were bad?
a green tick verifying you are a couple, a single female or a single male should never be a bad thing, yes it isn't fool proof but its better than having nothing. Don't agree with feedback systems though as its open to abuse and isnt very discreet.
If people need to see I am a female of a couple just come into my chat room my face is always on cam my hubby is sometimes about whistling too.
you can then tick your own box
We started off on L**** S*******.
Someone decided to give us feed back, and we had never met anyone... ever! So we had 5 stars with out even meeting anyone!
I was not happy, and deleted us off the site!
It all looked tacky at the time!
I feel that it is just wise judgement that is needed, you will get the timewasters on EVERY site!
Lucys post.
Someone decided to give us feed back, and we had never met anyone... ever! So we had 5 stars with out even meeting anyone!
I was not happy, and deleted us off the site!
It all looked tacky at the time!
I feel that it is just wise judgement that is needed, you will get the timewasters on EVERY site!
Lucys post.
Quote by Theladyisaminx
In general life we meet people we make friends surely we don’t base our judgement on what others have said. We must form our own opinion on people.
Say for example you were blind you would have to make a choice based on responses that one has said and rely on gut reaction then.
That is how I see people I go in blind and make my own opinion from conversing with them I don't think you could ever rely on others making up your mind on people
would you buy a plasma tv fram eBay from a seller with only 3 feedback which are all negative?
would you visit a swingers club that had 50 reviews and 48 were bad?
a green tick verifying you are a couple, a single female or a single male should never be a bad thing, yes it isn't fool proof but its better than having nothing. Don't agree with feedback systems though as its open to abuse and isnt very discreet.
If people need to see I am a female of a couple just come into my chat room my face is always on cam my hubby is sometimes about whistling too.
you can then tick your own box
In effect you have already verified yourself being on cam, just like attending socials can verify to other members you are what you say, it’s even done via word of mouth, that’s the whole point, we all already use methods to verify each other but on the other hand everyone gets up in arms when it gets brought up on the forums.
Sexlightened
Take SDC for example, The way it works is say your at a club and you just bump into a couple and start chatting, but nothing comes of it, you will get a validation saying possibly "bumped into this couple at XT and chatted, very easy to get along with, would like to spend more time getting to know you better" This give the couple two things, firstly there not a single guy prending to be a couple(very common on this site) secondly you know they are up for a shag next time you meet lol.
I have never seen a bad validation as it not plolite, you would just not validate if say they did not turn up and you had a bad time.
I have never seen a bad validation as it not plolite, you would just not validate if say they did not turn up and you had a bad time.
Sexlightened
You don't have to accept a validation
so your rep cannot be tarnished, what it does give you in the most part, that your a real swinging couple and that is the most important part
so your rep cannot be tarnished, what it does give you in the most part, that your a real swinging couple and that is the most important part
Quote by Deviants
In general life we meet people we make friends surely we don’t base our judgement on what others have said. We must form our own opinion on people.
Say for example you were blind you would have to make a choice based on responses that one has said and rely on gut reaction then.
That is how I see people I go in blind and make my own opinion from conversing with them I don't think you could ever rely on others making up your mind on people
would you buy a plasma tv fram eBay from a seller with only 3 feedback which are all negative?
would you visit a swingers club that had 50 reviews and 48 were bad?
a green tick verifying you are a couple, a single female or a single male should never be a bad thing, yes it isn't fool proof but its better than having nothing. Don't agree with feedback systems though as its open to abuse and isnt very discreet.
If people need to see I am a female of a couple just come into my chat room my face is always on cam my hubby is sometimes about whistling too.
you can then tick your own box
In effect you have already verified yourself being on cam, just like attending socials can verify to other members you are what you say, it’s even done via word of mouth, that’s the whole point, we all already use methods to verify each other but on the other hand everyone gets up in arms when it gets brought up on the forums.
Just because I am a real person doen't mean I am a real player.
I have meet people but I don't anymore as my profile reflects this.
As the op said a system that would weedle out timewasters and one of the ideas put forward was verifing people were male female etc.
well you could see I am a woman, but then you would need to know if I was still a timewaster.
I am honest in my profile, but I don't believe that is always the case.
Sex God
Quote by Cossie
I have never seen a bad validation as it not plolite, you would just not validate if say they did not turn up and you had a bad time.
thank you for answering the questions
you have also hit one of the point as to why I am not a fan. If you only see the good and never see the bad and person can decide exactly what is shown on there profile.... then does that not give you a skewed opinion of a person
I'll give you an example, a person may have had 2 good meets and 15 bad ones, but yet you only see the 2 good ones.. where does that help you make a rounded decision on whether to meet or not?
I think we are now beginning to talk about two different thing... if we are talking about varification only in the sense of what deviants has said, people saying that I am who I say I am, then I think I could be talked around to begrudingly accepting that...
but any varification that uses an amount of feedback to do that I think a lot of people are not going to be happy with... because it brings up all sorts of other issues, and then i think you end up with your two tier system.....
Quote by Cossie
You don't have to accept a validation
so your rep cannot be tarnished, what it does give you in the most part, that your a real swinging couple and that is the most important part
Then as far as weeding out timewasters goes, which seems to be the major wish behind a system being introduced, it cannot possibly make a damn bit of difference can it?
The real timewasters don't publish any bad feedback they recieve, so no one else knows they are timewasters anyway and as others have said, the fact that you are a 'genuine' couple/single male or single female bears no relation on whether you are a timewaster or not.
So again, what's the point?
Sexlightened
Yes, But no validation no contact for us, I will not waste time chatting to anyone with out a validation.
This sounds realy harsh, but it works 90% of the time.
we only play with couples, so we need to know that the couple is a couple and they play and the validation system proves that. It does not mean they will be a time waster, it does not mean that we will not have a bad time, but what it does mean its not some bloke with old pictures of his ex girl friend wasting our time.
This sounds realy harsh, but it works 90% of the time.
we only play with couples, so we need to know that the couple is a couple and they play and the validation system proves that. It does not mean they will be a time waster, it does not mean that we will not have a bad time, but what it does mean its not some bloke with old pictures of his ex girl friend wasting our time.
Seems that some have flamed me for my opinions, dont flame me but understand me.
We are a couple and we want to know that the people we meet, turn up, and are genuine.
We used to go to a club called Skinnydippers, and when we first went there, you were shown around and either liked it or not but.....if you wanted to come back for a second visit you had to have a photograph taken of both of you, to be able to gain entry to the club.
They had a members section where you could see peoples faces, and if you put your name down for a party, a party list was made on their web site, where you could see who was going to the party.
Of course there were people who did not want their picture taken, and so they were not allowed entry. Yes they did relax that after a couple of years, but most did not mind.
We never really thought about it when we had our picture done, as that was the rules of the club at that time. Yes there will be people on here who would say, sod that, am not having my picture taken, and that would be their choice, but you knew that was the clubs rule.
On L Swingers it seems to work perfectly ok, and we have had some great meets from people who were verified, and you know what? Everyone of those people turned up. Unlike on here where we have heard some mega stories of lots not turning up, for no reason at all. That to me means that verification can and does work, but of course it is not for everyone. So don't slate me for having my opinion on the subject. It works for US!
We are a couple and we want to know that the people we meet, turn up, and are genuine.
We used to go to a club called Skinnydippers, and when we first went there, you were shown around and either liked it or not but.....if you wanted to come back for a second visit you had to have a photograph taken of both of you, to be able to gain entry to the club.
They had a members section where you could see peoples faces, and if you put your name down for a party, a party list was made on their web site, where you could see who was going to the party.
Of course there were people who did not want their picture taken, and so they were not allowed entry. Yes they did relax that after a couple of years, but most did not mind.
We never really thought about it when we had our picture done, as that was the rules of the club at that time. Yes there will be people on here who would say, sod that, am not having my picture taken, and that would be their choice, but you knew that was the clubs rule.
On L Swingers it seems to work perfectly ok, and we have had some great meets from people who were verified, and you know what? Everyone of those people turned up. Unlike on here where we have heard some mega stories of lots not turning up, for no reason at all. That to me means that verification can and does work, but of course it is not for everyone. So don't slate me for having my opinion on the subject. It works for US!
Quote by Cossie
Yes, But no validation no contact for us, I will not waste time chatting to anyone with out a validation.
This sounds realy harsh, but it works 90% of the time.
we only play with couples, so we need to know that the couple is a couple and they play and the validation system proves that. It does not mean they will be a time waster, it does not mean that we will not have a bad time, but what it does mean its not some bloke with old pictures of his ex girl friend wasting our time.
I do believe it must be much harder for couples to meet genuine couples. But I can not see a fail proof system, can you?
Quote by staffcple
So again, what's the point?
Laziness.
People like things to be easy for them. It is on the platter, they have paid for it and they can use others recommendations.
When it goes wrong.......what are they going to blame it on then? Or perhaps we will never have a "timewaster post" again.......woohooooooo!!!!
Dave_Notts
Sexlightened
No, but its better than non at all
Quote by kentswingers777
On L Swingers it seems to work perfectly ok, and we have had some great meets from people who were verified, and you know what? Everyone of those people turned up.
I'm not slating you for having your opinion Kenty, but believe me when I say I have seen people's reputations absolutely destroyed and them driven from that site you mention through the feedback system they use. Not to mention the poilitics that go on..."You met so and so, we don't want to meet you" etc etc.
Again though, the system for verification on that site involves a female voice ringing an answerphone and leaving a profile number. That gains the profile a green tick, which means what exactly....you guessed it, a female rang a answerphone and said a few letters and numbers. It does not prove anything else.
Sex God
Quote by Cossie
Yes, But no validation no contact for us, I will not waste time chatting to anyone with out a validation.
bingo!
and there is your two tier system.....
the haves and have nots now put yourself back in the position of being newbies again, if all couples had the same attitude that you have now, then no newbies would never get meets.... or you just make it harder for them to integrate into the scene
Quote by Dave__Notts
Laziness.
People like things to be easy for them. It is on the platter, they have paid for it and they can use others recommendations.
Quote by Fabio
bingo!
and there is your two tier system.....the haves and have nots
now put yourself back in the position of being newbies again, if all couples had the same attitude that you have now, then no newbies would never get meets.... or you just make it harder for them to integrate into the scene
And there in two quick answers is everything that is wrong with a validation system.
Sexlightened
Nope you just go to one of the SDC club nights which are all over the country, you don't even have to play.
Once you start chatting people will ask you your SDC user name
BINGO
one Validation
Once you start chatting people will ask you your SDC user name
BINGO
one Validation
Sex God
Quote by Deviants
In effect you have already verified yourself being on cam, just like attending socials can verify to other members you are what you say, it’s even done via word of mouth, that’s the whole point, we all already use methods to verify each other but on the other hand everyone gets up in arms when it gets brought up on the forums.
Of course verification goes on by other means. We verify ourselves by attending socials; the single fems on here chat all the time, and compare notes, cos they have to do that to protect themselves. That kind of verification though is a matter for the individuals concerned, that is completely independent of the site, and other site users, and not open to the kind of manipulation you get with a website verification system.
You're saying if verification goes on anyways, why not add it to the site? My question is, why give the site, and other members control, and the opportunity to abuse a process we can all quite easily do for ourselves? What is to be gained?
I've still not seen an answer on this thread that establishes that the benefits ((( beyond the fact that it appears to help some people feel a little bit more confident about making contact ))) outweigh the obvious drawbacks, insofar as it doesn't really sort the wheat from the chaff particularly effectively, and it being open to abuse. 
It smacks of spoonfeeding and comfort blankets. N x x x ;)
Rather than verification system I think an optional reputation system. Think of it this way you night be well known and respected amogst a group of friends here but maybe you dont swing with them?.
A reputation system would allow people that you know on the site or that you have met to give you either a possitive or negative rep (similar to ebay feedback).
The thing is the devil is in the detail so
Randoms should not be able to neg you for no reason.
Maybe when you arrange to meet someone from the site you both click something beforehand to open the option up?
Let us know your suggestions? we will then poll the whole site not just the forum users to see if they want it.
A reputation system would allow people that you know on the site or that you have met to give you either a possitive or negative rep (similar to ebay feedback).
The thing is the devil is in the detail so
Randoms should not be able to neg you for no reason.
Maybe when you arrange to meet someone from the site you both click something beforehand to open the option up?
Let us know your suggestions? we will then poll the whole site not just the forum users to see if they want it.
Right a question or two for all the pro verification folks. What do hope/expect a verification will prove,
1. are people who they claim to be on their profile? IMO this is the most achievable goal, but is there any need the site already does it's best to ensure profiles are accurate and not miss leading. If you find one you think is dodgy, report it, admin will investigate and if it is dodgy it will get deleted.
2. who are time wasters and will it get rid of them? You'll never get rid of time wasters, putting obstacles in their way for some only increases the thrill they get from wasting folks time. I've seen it argued on free sites that they should become paysites to discourage time wasting, does it work does it bollox! this is a paysite and as some have said there are a lot of time wasters here
3. Do you want it because other sites have them or because you genuinely believe it will make the site a better place to be?
Right my personal opinions on verification is its a waste of time and causes more arguments than it solves. I too have been round the other sites with verification systems in place and all I can say is don't believe everything you read, Oh an as for feedback lets not even go there with this site please.
1. are people who they claim to be on their profile? IMO this is the most achievable goal, but is there any need the site already does it's best to ensure profiles are accurate and not miss leading. If you find one you think is dodgy, report it, admin will investigate and if it is dodgy it will get deleted.
2. who are time wasters and will it get rid of them? You'll never get rid of time wasters, putting obstacles in their way for some only increases the thrill they get from wasting folks time. I've seen it argued on free sites that they should become paysites to discourage time wasting, does it work does it bollox! this is a paysite and as some have said there are a lot of time wasters here
3. Do you want it because other sites have them or because you genuinely believe it will make the site a better place to be?
Right my personal opinions on verification is its a waste of time and causes more arguments than it solves. I too have been round the other sites with verification systems in place and all I can say is don't believe everything you read, Oh an as for feedback lets not even go there with this site please.
We’re all for the green tick scenario, which verifies that the profile is that of a couple or single female/male, whether this is done via photo verification or via web cam with site admin, however all this feedback and positive / negative stuff is a big no no, far to open to abuse, you only have to have a fall out with someone and all hell could break loose. However none of these would guarantee anyone turning up to a meet but it might at least give an indication before you take it further that it’s a single females profile your actually viewing.
In an ideal world every profile would have a tick and nobody would be left out, unless of course you’re a male with a female account and cannot be verified.
Yes its not foolproof, nothing ever is but it would weed out a lot of the people pretending to be something they are not.
In an ideal world every profile would have a tick and nobody would be left out, unless of course you’re a male with a female account and cannot be verified.
Yes its not foolproof, nothing ever is but it would weed out a lot of the people pretending to be something they are not.
