opt in..opt out.....come on....fact is...if you opt out..people will ask why !! Same as not having any pics on here...people ask why ?
I don't feel personally validation is required, but will feel pressured into useing it, because people will otherwise say..oh what you got to hide then.
Have to say..I have been on site almost 5 years now, and don't know if I have simply been lucky, or I choosen carefully and wisely, but I have not met one timewaster yet. Sure people have agreed to meet, and then not been able to, but to be fair have always rung or written and told me so. Maybe a little more time taken over our potential meet partners, may acually prove the way forward !!!
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ideas for verifying members as genuine
Orgasminator
the only way varification should be used is to prove you are who you say you are be it couple, male, female. then after your verification people should be able to report like now if your profile isn't as it says so it can be re-verified. and the verification should only be done by a site op so that it is not open to abuse... the same whay ebay and paypal verifie your address and bank accounts to prove you are genuine.
any other verification wou;d be open to abuse and pointless!
any other verification wou;d be open to abuse and pointless!
I dont look at profiles and think "oh they are free members they are less likely to be genuine or turn up"
If there was a profile without pictures and was verified loads of times I still wouldnt bother because we prefer all contact to be done through site.
If someone had photos on and wasnt verified I would bother with them, just because they dont have verification then it doesnt mean they arnt genuine.
I agree with most of what cossie has said regarding the verification apart from up the rent
If there was a profile without pictures and was verified loads of times I still wouldnt bother because we prefer all contact to be done through site.
If someone had photos on and wasnt verified I would bother with them, just because they dont have verification then it doesnt mean they arnt genuine.
I agree with most of what cossie has said regarding the verification apart from up the rent
Quote by TabbynTina
I dont look at profiles and think "oh they are free members they are less likely to be genuine or turn up"
If there was a profile without pictures and was verified loads of times I still wouldnt bother because we prefer all contact to be done through site.
If someone had photos on and wasnt verified I would bother with them, just because they dont have verification then it doesnt mean they arnt genuine.
I agree with most of what cossie has said regarding the verification apart from up the rent
What are your thoughts on people who have no pictures, and nothing written on their profile?
Does not that lead some to think they may not be genuine?
Quote by kentswingers777
I dont look at profiles and think "oh they are free members they are less likely to be genuine or turn up"
If there was a profile without pictures and was verified loads of times I still wouldnt bother because we prefer all contact to be done through site.
If someone had photos on and wasnt verified I would bother with them, just because they dont have verification then it doesnt mean they arnt genuine.
I agree with most of what cossie has said regarding the verification apart from up the rent
What are your thoughts on people who have no pictures, and nothing written on their profile?
Does not that lead some to think they may not be genuine?
But, whilst it's part of the process, surely there are other ways of finding out if someone is genuine?
Using Steve as an example, he's been on the forums for a while, participates in the chatrooms, has attended numerous socials and munches, whether he has had meets I don't want to know (discretion). Surely all those add to the process of find out if someone is genuine.
Why so hung up on non-complete profiles? Surely there are plenty on here that are complete.
Quote by kentswingers777
What are your thoughts on people who have no pictures, and nothing written on their profile?
Does not that lead some to think they may not be genuine?
I would have no thought about genuine or not at the start. I would be intrigued and use the age old communication to find out if we are compatible. After chatting on-line and an exchange of pictures/cam and confirmation by telephone we may go further or decide that we won't get on.
The build up to a meet is very erotic for us.
People can have a full writen profile, photos and a verification. This could consist of:
Having a profile saying how they like shoving a cauliflower up their arse, having a few photos of their kebab and turkey neck and having a nice green tick with a write up asking for their cauliflower back as it is Sunday tommorrow and the corner shop is closed.
That wouldn't tell me that they were genuine, it would just tell me who shagged who and I just ain't interested.
Profiles are a start but not an absolute requirement. Getting to know people is our way to swing.
Dave_Notts
Quote by kentswingers777
What are your thoughts on people who have no pictures, and nothing written on their profile?
Does not that lead some to think they may not be genuine?
I have no public pictures and I have no useful information in my profile.
Do you think I'm genuine, or am I a timewaster.?
Quote by Ian
What are your thoughts on people who have no pictures, and nothing written on their profile?
Does not that lead some to think they may not be genuine?
I have no public pictures and I have no useful information in my profile.
Do you think I'm genuine, or am I a timewaster.?
You tell me. But would I have enough information to believe what you said anyway?
Your profile has 3 private pictures which we could ask to see if we was interested but...there is nothing there about other important things. So as a lot of others do have those things, we would be more likely to contact them first.
Can I ask why you have not filled out your profile? Is giving your build away a big problem?
I can understand some people not wanting public pictures, but I cannot for the life of me understand why a profile is not filled out...where is the problem in that?
For us we look at a profile to see if there are pictures, if there are we make a decision to carry on and read the profile. If that is filled out and the ages and builds are what we are looking for, we would then maybe make contact via a message.
They then have the opprtunity to look at our pictures which are genuine, and our filled out profile. If they contact us back with a positive, we would then have a chat on the phone and take things from there.
We tend to ignore members with no pictures or no profiles. Sorry but that is the way we do things, maybe thats right and maybe thats wrong, but it has worked for us.
Quote by kentswingers777
What are your thoughts on people who have no pictures, and nothing written on their profile?
Does not that lead some to think they may not be genuine?
I have no public pictures and I have no useful information in my profile.
Do you think I'm genuine, or am I a timewaster.?
You tell me. But would I have enough information to believe what you said anyway?
Your profile has 3 private pictures which we could ask to see if we was interested but...there is nothing there about other important things. So as a lot of others do have those things, we would be more likely to contact them first.
Can I ask why you have not filled out your profile? Is giving your build away a big problem?
I can understand some people not wanting public pictures, but I cannot for the life of me understand why a profile is not filled out...where is the problem in that?
For us we look at a profile to see if there are pictures, if there are we make a decision to carry on and read the profile. If that is filled out and the ages and builds are what we are looking for, we would then maybe make contact via a message.
They then have the opprtunity to look at our pictures which are genuine, and our filled out profile. If they contact us back with a positive, we would then have a chat on the phone and take things from there.
We tend to ignore members with no pictures or no profiles. Sorry but that is the way we do things, maybe thats right and maybe thats wrong, but it has worked for us.
Pictures for me has never been a problem if people have them or not,I do like a well written and thought out profile. If I make contact I like to cam face to face as soon as possible then take it from there.
Just beacuse I talk to people that is still no gaurantee we will meet.
Sex God
Quote by kentswingers777
Sorry but that is the way we do things, maybe thats right and maybe thats wrong, but it has worked for us.
I don't think there's any need to apologise for that. My way doesn't necessarily work for other people. That's okay. :mrgreen:
It's not right or wrong, it's doing what works for you that counts. If someone doesn't fill in their profile and they miss out on you making contact with them then that's really their loss.
Equally, if Ian chooses to swing in a different way then that's okay too. He doesn't have to justify not filling in his profile. That's his choice. (And probably mostly cause he's not had time after counting all Dawnie's knickers!)
It's all about informed choices. If you have the information you make a choice. If you don't have the information then you also make a choice. The point is that that choice is yours to make.
I don't have any objection to you using a verification system to enhance the way you swing. If it works for you, go for your life. I'd just like the choice whether to do the same or not to bother. I think that's really what the majority are saying. Switch it on if you want it. :mrgreen:
Quote by Ian
Can I ask why you have not filled out your profile? Is giving your build away a big problem?
There is a valid reason. I will pm you with it. Maybe if you agree with it, you might post to say as such.
Ian
To be honest Ian, you and Dawnie have pretty much verified that you both are who you say you are via your status, just like most people attending a munch or social have done likewise to others present.
The problem is not everyone attends socials and munches or wants to, or posts in the forums or goes on cam in chat, all of which is actualy verifying yourself anyway to someone else, so in effect everyone already verifies themselves in some way or another but on the same token they dismiss verifications as being useless.
Still not sure if people are talking about verifying people or feeback systems or both, its all confusing
Quote by Deviants
........ but on the same token they dismiss verifications as being useless.
I think people were showing the cons, not saying it was useless.
There are three opinions here.
1) Verification is great and it is nothing but great
2) Verification is bad and is totally evil
3) Verification is just a tool but it has limitations and can ruin peoples reputation
Dave_Notts
Quote by Deviants
To be honest Ian, you and Dawnie have pretty much verified that you both are who you say you are via your status, just like most people attending a munch or social have done likewise to others present.
But this highlights one of the major problems I have with verification.
Due to lack of childcare, we can often be found out separately at munches, socials, parties, clubs (I wish she would go shopping on her own
).Going on the previous comments in this thread, if I ever turned up at an event without Dawnie, then I would be branded a cheating, lying single bloke pretending to be a couple.
Ian
Quote by Ian
To be honest Ian, you and Dawnie have pretty much verified that you both are who you say you are via your status, just like most people attending a munch or social have done likewise to others present.
But this highlights one of the major problems I have with verification.
Due to lack of childcare, we can often be found out separately at munches, socials, parties, clubs (I wish she would go shopping on her own
).Going on the previous comments in this thread, if I ever turned up at an event without Dawnie, then I would be branded a cheating, lying single bloke pretending to be a couple.
Ian
The trouble is Ian, a lot on here fall into that catagory. Married guys pretending to be single is rife. How do I know? Well if we wanted to meet a guy, we can only do sats, funny how a lot cannot do Sats. They can do midweek though. :lol: :lol:
Quote by Ian
To be honest Ian, you and Dawnie have pretty much verified that you both are who you say you are via your status, just like most people attending a munch or social have done likewise to others present.
But this highlights one of the major problems I have with verification.
Due to lack of childcare, we can often be found out separately at munches, socials, parties, clubs (I wish she would go shopping on her own
).Going on the previous comments in this thread, if I ever turned up at an event without Dawnie, then I would be branded a cheating, lying single bloke pretending to be a couple.
Ian
well if thats the case you must be getting branded that now then? being verified would not take your partners consent away, it only confirms your what you say you are, and verification is not about catching cheats, thats a whole different thing.
Quote by Deviants
so in effect everyone already verifies themselves in some way or another but on the same token they dismiss verifications as being useless.
My point of view is simple,
Verifying a profile is useless for indicating whether or not someone is a 'timewaster'
For that you need feedback, with all of the associated problems that brings.
That's it in a nutshell.
Quote by kentswingers777
I can understand some people not wanting public pictures, but I cannot for the life of me understand why a profile is not filled out...where is the problem in that?
You said before you couldn't understand why people didn't have pictures or a profile. I answered you saying that some people just don't want to have them. How hard is that to understand? You replied with a comment that implied we weren't real swingers because we didn't meet. I asked you how you defined a "real" swinger and you didn't reply. I just wondered whether going to a club every week for the last 8 years counts because that's what we've done.
Our profile gives all the details needed ... it says "only meet at clubs." Why would we need to say anything about ourselves or put photos on our profile when we have no interest in meeting off the net? If not meeting off the net means we're not real swingers then so be it, but I would hazard a guess that we've played more than the vast majority of posters on this thread despite our lack of pictures and profile.
A fancy profile and pictures doesn't always mean anything, just like verification.
Quote by flower411
All those in favour of a verification system ....still keep on about the other sites ...
If you want a verification system, why not just use those sites ?
I know I`ve asked this question before
But, I still haven`t spotted an answer !!!
Because this has the best forum and the best chatrooms with the most people. The Admin staff do a brilliant job.... verification would be another 'thing' to have to make swinging easier/better for those that think it makes things easier and better.
Quote by staffcple
so in effect everyone already verifies themselves in some way or another but on the same token they dismiss verifications as being useless.
My point of view is simple,
Verifying a profile is useless for indicating whether or not someone is a 'timewaster'
For that you need feedback, with all of the associated problems that brings.
That's it in a nutshell.
we have already stated verifications wont stop timewasters, but it might cut in half the the amount of fake profiles around.
it also helps newer members that haven't yet been known who don't like forums or attending socials.
can't comment on the feedback system as thats not something we agree about, and as you have rightly said, it is too open to abuse and not very discreet.
Quote by Deviants
we have already stated verifications wont stop timewasters, but it might cut in half the the amount of fake profiles around.
it also helps newer members that haven't yet been known who don't like forums or attending socials.
can't comment on the feedback system as thats not something we agree about, and as you have rightly said, it is too open to abuse and not very discreet.
Help :shock: So who is going to do the verification if it isn't done by feedback?
Are we expecting the Mods to verify every member?
I think that might take a few years :giggle:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Quote by flower411
All those in favour of a verification system ....still keep on about the other sites ...
If you want a verification system, why not just use those sites ?
I know I`ve asked this question before
But, I still haven`t spotted an answer !!!
Because this has the best forum and the best chatrooms with the most people. The Admin staff do a brilliant job.... verification would be another 'thing' to have to make swinging easier/better for those that think it makes things easier and better.
Yep !!
So the best site with the best forum and the best chatrooms will become better if it changes to become like all the other sites !!!
Oh yeah .... I get it now !! :roll:
Flower, you regularly open a chat room where you both been seen on cam, in effect verifying yourselves that you are who you say you are, a couple with both male and female, so why would having a tick on your profile saying verified couple be such a bad thing?
Quote by blonde
we have already stated verifications wont stop timewasters, but it might cut in half the the amount of fake profiles around.
it also helps newer members that haven't yet been known who don't like forums or attending socials.
can't comment on the feedback system as thats not something we agree about, and as you have rightly said, it is too open to abuse and not very discreet.
Help :shock: So who is going to do the verification if it isn't done by feedback?
Are we expecting the Mods to verify every member?
I think that might take a few years :giggle:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Ideally, yes, as that would be the system that would work best, but its only an idea and an opinion, we all know it’ll never happen though, regardless of how we all feel and the pros an cons of any system put in place I’d think we’ll all agree on one thing, it would be nice when searching profiles that when searching for a single female for example that the results would bring back single females profiles and not someone pretending to be one.
Quote by flower411
All those in favour of a verification system ....still keep on about the other sites ...
If you want a verification system, why not just use those sites ?
I know I`ve asked this question before
But, I still haven`t spotted an answer !!!
Because this has the best forum and the best chatrooms with the most people. The Admin staff do a brilliant job.... verification would be another 'thing' to have to make swinging easier/better for those that think it makes things easier and better.
Yep !!
So the best site with the best forum and the best chatrooms will become better if it changes to become like all the other sites !!!
Oh yeah .... I get it now !! :roll:
Flower, you regularly open a chat room where you both been seen on cam, in effect verifying yourselves that you are who you say you are, a couple with both male and female, so why would having a tick on your profile saying verified couple be such a bad thing?
That one`s simple to answer
We believe in discretion when it comes to the people we meet ....I don`t want my profile showing who we`ve met ..
Pretty much the same reason we have "quickies" disabled .
sorry we're not in favour of a feedback system, your verification would be verifying your a couple and that only, or that is the method we are talking about.
:lol: :lol: :lol:
I still don't understand .......... I am sorry. 
A couple registers & gets verified by the Mods/Ops.
The couple split up but the male retains the couples profile.
How on earth will a handful of Mods police this?
I really disagree with any sort of verification and it goes against everything that SH used to be.
It makes the site just another sex site IMHO but it will help to sell membership I guess!!
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
A couple registers & gets verified by the Mods/Ops.
The couple split up but the male retains the couples profile.
How on earth will a handful of Mods police this?
I really disagree with any sort of verification and it goes against everything that SH used to be.
It makes the site just another sex site IMHO but it will help to sell membership I guess!!
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
These bloody timewasters!!!!!!
When I search for a single fem I want a single fem!!!!
Not what they bloody said they were!!!!!!
He was bloody married!!!!!!
Can someone remind me when swinging stopped being a fun activity between consenting adults and started being a supermarket sweep. It sounds like someone will be complaining to the trades description people next
Dave_Notts
When I search for a single fem I want a single fem!!!!
Not what they bloody said they were!!!!!!
He was bloody married!!!!!!
Can someone remind me when swinging stopped being a fun activity between consenting adults and started being a supermarket sweep. It sounds like someone will be complaining to the trades description people next
Dave_Notts
I have read every response and I still do not understand what people mean by a verification system as there seems to be differing opinions, even by those that want it.
Is it
1) a tick in a box to say someone has met you? (Mentioning no names)
2) a tick in a box with comments ( met can confirm their profile is who they say they are)
3) a tick in a box (contact ladyisaminx for further details)
4) a tick in a box with comments (had great time can shag like rabbits)
until it is clear what some want I am still
Maybe some could tick my boxes
Is it
1) a tick in a box to say someone has met you? (Mentioning no names)
2) a tick in a box with comments ( met can confirm their profile is who they say they are)
3) a tick in a box (contact ladyisaminx for further details)
4) a tick in a box with comments (had great time can shag like rabbits)
until it is clear what some want I am still
Maybe some could tick my boxes
