Instead of a quick hello?

6 Jul 2011

I'm finding this site hard work at the moment. When I first joined I had more time to waste in the chat rooms. But it seems few bother to responds to emails even with a polite refusal.
I saw on one profile a comment to the effect "we don't reply to mails saying hi I like your profile please look at mine and let me know if you're interested". It leaves me wondering what else you should/can say in an introductory email? The longer your here and the more cynical and jaded you get the more your outgoing emails are going to take that form aren't they? So what would people recommend saying as the best way to introduce themselves and what would they like to hear that the unwashed masses just aren't giving them? :-o

6 Jul 2011

There is no standard message that will work.
My opinion,
Things changed for me 6 months or so on my 'return' here, I came with less immediate expectations and more patience, I understand more about what I'm looking for and what I can offer to others in return.
Carefully read the profile, adverts, forum posts and chat room antics of the people you would like to approach. Only approach if you are genuinely interested in them, I used to spam off loads of Pm's to people who didn't exactly fit what I was looking for, but I :rascal: thought what the hell a meet is a meet. I was wrong, I wasted my own time and theirs - it rarely got to a meet, if it did it was not as good as it should have been for everyone involved.
Make your message interesting to them, remember PMs from single males will be filling the inbox of any nice couple or female, you need to stand out and show signs of understanding their position and a offer a connection of some sort.
I usually add a joke, my jokes are bad, hence why I get so few replies sad

Good luck and if that doesn't work say:
"Brucie knows where you live - its me or him"
should work a treat

6 Jul 2011

Quote by loveshell74
I'm finding this site hard work at the moment. When I first joined I had more time to waste in the chat rooms. But it seems few bother to responds to emails even with a polite refusal.

If you are wasting your time - then you are probably wasting other people's time too. Perhaps if your reason for being in the chatroom was to entertain yourself and others then you would not feel as if you were being deliberately ignored.

Quote by loveshell74
I saw on one profile a comment to the effect "we don't reply to mails saying hi I like your profile please look at mine and let me know if you're interested". It leaves me wondering what else you should/can say in an introductory email?

Yes basically. We always reply to emails we receive - but that is because we are not up our own arses. However, when we do receive a standard email, we do write a snotty reply, and if that means our reputation drops in the mind of the person who sent us an email that was composed for them by the site - then we will live with it.

Quote by loveshell74
The longer your here and the more cynical and jaded you get the more your outgoing emails are going to take that form aren't they?

Probably - I won't argue that point with you, what I would say is if you stopped sending emails at all, then you wouldn't be missed. There are loads of others to take your place.

Quote by loveshell74
So what would people recommend saying as the best way to introduce themselves and what would they like to hear that the unwashed masses just aren't giving them? :-o

Firstly I would read their profile, and judge whether I had anything to offer them. If I did not, and simply wanted to let them know that I had read their profile then I would tell them so (if I felt that I needed to - whether it be a good or bad).
If I did have something that they wanted then I would set myself out to offer it, not a hard-sell or anything, but just an offer, which they were free to accept or decline. It doesn't matter what the offer is - it could be an invitation to chat more, either by mail, chat, phone, webcam, msn or whatever else.
If they respond then the rest is up to you - if they don't even bother to acknowledge your existence then firstly check they have opened your mail, and a reasonable time has passed, if you are satisifed that they are too ignorant to even reply then simply don't give them any more of your time.
You simply must remember that many people on here are not what they claim to be, and sometimes an email, telephone, webcam offer etc can set them off guard as they are clearly pretending to be what they are not - it is not a case of them being ignorant, it is a case of you calling their bluff.
Nevertheless - if someone does not acknowledge you on the internet, it is similar in many ways to not being acknowledged for real. Rise above, move on, and don't compromise your politeness for the lack of someone elses.

6 Jul 2011

Egads! You are a scary man! rotflmao

Quote by brucie
i find this works
"hello, i know who you are and where you live. unless you have sex with me i am going to expose you as the sick perverted sex maniacs you are to everyone in your community, work and your childrens' schools. by the way, safe sex in not required. love brucie".

6 Jul 2011

Quote by Big_Fraser
I usually add a joke, my jokes are bad, hence why I get so few replies
Good luck and if that doesn't work say:
"Brucie knows where you live - its me or him"
should work a treat

Hey, that one's pretty good. Mind if I use it? My comedy porn star tash might come in handy as well :haha:

6 Jul 2011

Quote by HimandHer
If you are wasting your time - then you are probably wasting other people's time too. Perhaps if your reason for being in the chatroom was to entertain yourself and others then you would not feel as if you were being deliberately ignored.

I really must remember to add my smilies. I'm obviously coming across as genuinely cynical and jaded! banghead

:color:

Quote by HimandHer
I saw on one profile a comment to the effect "we don't reply to mails saying hi I like your profile please look at mine and let me know if you're interested". It leaves me wondering what else you should/can say in an introductory email?

Yes basically. We always reply to emails we receive - but that is because we are not up our own arses. However, when we do receive a standard email, we do write a snotty reply, and if that means our reputation drops in the mind of the person who sent us an email that was composed for them by the site - then we will live with it.

I don't mean standard manufactured emails though I guess it could be hard to tell the difference sometimes. Not everyone gives you enough to go on but they might still be worth getting to know.

Quote by HimandHer
Probably - I won't argue that point with you, what I would say is if you stopped sending emails at all, then you wouldn't be missed. There are loads of others to take your place.

I was looking for a meow smiley here but this is the closest I could find poke

That said the truth hurts. smile

Quote by HimandHer
So what would people recommend saying as the best way to introduce themselves and what would they like to hear that the unwashed masses just aren't giving them? :-o

Firstly I would read their profile, and judge whether I had anything to offer them. If I did not, and simply wanted to let them know that I had read their profile then I would tell them so (if I felt that I needed to - whether it be a good or bad).
If I did have something that they wanted then I would set myself out to offer it, not a hard-sell or anything, but just an offer, which they were free to accept or decline. It doesn't matter what the offer is - it could be an invitation to chat more, either by mail, chat, phone, webcam, msn or whatever else.
If they respond then the rest is up to you - if they don't even bother to acknowledge your existence then firstly check they have opened your mail, and a reasonable time has passed, if you are satisifed that they are too ignorant to even reply then simply don't give them any more of your time.
You simply must remember that many people on here are not what they claim to be, and sometimes an email, telephone, webcam offer etc can set them off guard as they are clearly pretending to be what they are not - it is not a case of them being ignorant, it is a case of you calling their bluff.
Nevertheless - if someone does not acknowledge you on the internet, it is similar in many ways to not being acknowledged for real. Rise above, move on, and don't compromise your politeness for the lack of someone elses.
Well said. Thank you.

7 Jul 2011

You posted exactly the same post on another well known site. If you're having problems on both, have you thought that it's not the fault of the "unwashed masses"?

7 Jul 2011

Quote by BrightbabeUK
You posted exactly the same post on another well known site. If you're having problems on both, have you thought that it's not the fault of the "unwashed masses"?

If you read the OP you'll note I classed myself among the unwashed masses, though obviously I don't mean we don't wash. Its just a tongue in cheek expression. If the hat and moustache don't suggest I have a sense of humour what will?
This is meant as a curious post not a whiny please help me post (looks like I missed the mark there!). I've posted on both sites in part to compare the responses as I know people on both sites. There's also an aspect of trying to determine which site is best for me. At the moment I'm spending far too long on both sites and not getting on with my life. Something I'm sure a lot of you can relate to.
So who are you on the other site if you don't mind me asking?

25 Jul 2011

Quote by loveshell74
I'm finding this site hard work at the moment. When I first joined I had more time to waste in the chat rooms. But it seems few bother to responds to emails even with a polite refusal.
I saw on one profile a comment to the effect "we don't reply to mails saying hi I like your profile please look at mine and let me know if you're interested". It leaves me wondering what else you should/can say in an introductory email? The longer your here and the more cynical and jaded you get the more your outgoing emails are going to take that form aren't they? So what would people recommend saying as the best way to introduce themselves and what would they like to hear that the unwashed masses just aren't giving them? :-o

As a couple, we get a few one liners and winks and to be honest they do nothing for us. If however, someone takes the time to send a message that's well thought out and relevant to us, then that's something that would take our interest.
It's all about standing our from the crowd as a single guy, pay attention to what the couple is asking for and if you see yourself as being a good fit for that then let them know. Some want face pics, some want cock pics. Some want hung studs, some want the guy next door.
Unfortunately, if you're feeling jaded and frustrated, that may come across in your approach.
Good luck.

25 Jul 2011

Quote by loveshell74
I'm finding this site hard work at the moment. When I first joined I had more time to waste in the chat rooms. But it seems few bother to responds to emails even with a polite refusal.
I saw on one profile a comment to the effect "we don't reply to mails saying hi I like your profile please look at mine and let me know if you're interested". It leaves me wondering what else you should/can say in an introductory email? The longer your here and the more cynical and jaded you get the more your outgoing emails are going to take that form aren't they? So what would people recommend saying as the best way to introduce themselves and what would they like to hear that the unwashed masses just aren't giving them? :-o

As a couple, we get a few one liners and winks and to be honest they do nothing for us. If however, someone takes the time to send a message that's well thought out and relevant to us, then that's something that would take our interest.
It's all about standing our from the crowd as a single guy, pay attention to what the couple is asking for and if you see yourself as being a good fit for that then let them know. Some want face pics, some want cock pics. Some want hung studs, some want the guy next door.
Unfortunately, if you're feeling jaded and frustrated, that may come across in your approach.
Good luck.

25 Jul 2011

I had the same problem when i went from a couple to single male on here. One minute inbox absolutely rammed full everyday, the next (when i changed to a single male) very few people even replied.
The solution i found with a little more success was to write a very informative and well written (in my opinion anyway) draft mail that included all my details, what i was looking for/could offer, my likes and dislikes and do's and donts. I sent it to anyone who took my interest and saved the hassle of writing individual messages every time. It included the line "im sorry this is a draft email but after spending a long time sending mails and not getting replies i found that this solution saves a lot of time if you are not interested, and includes everything you might like to know if you do, as a single male i'm sure you can understand i'm the majority and i'm sure you get a lot of mail".
It increased my success slightly but saved my time MASSIVELY! Good Luck mate.

25 Jul 2011

Quote by loveshell74
I'm finding this site hard work at the moment. When I first joined I had more time to waste in the chat rooms. But it seems few bother to responds to emails even with a polite refusal.
I saw on one profile a comment to the effect "we don't reply to mails saying hi I like your profile please look at mine and let me know if you're interested". It leaves me wondering what else you should/can say in an introductory email? The longer your here and the more cynical and jaded you get the more your outgoing emails are going to take that form aren't they? So what would people recommend saying as the best way to introduce themselves and what would they like to hear that the unwashed masses just aren't giving them? :-o

As a couple, we get a few one liners and winks and to be honest they do nothing for us. If however, someone takes the time to send a message that's well thought out and relevant to us, then that's something that would take our interest.
It's all about standing our from the crowd as a single guy, pay attention to what the couple is asking for and if you see yourself as being a good fit for that then let them know. Some want face pics, some want cock pics. Some want hung studs, some want the guy next door.
Unfortunately, if you're feeling jaded and frustrated, that may come across in your approach.
Good luck.

25 Jul 2011

As another single male on this site I understand your frustrations, and I have a few suggestions which you can regard or disregard.
To me your profile seems a bit too long. I know it's a dilemma, as for every member here who declares that they like a nice detailed profile, there seem to be many who just don't or can't allow themselves time to judge someone. But I still think it's too long, and rather too philosophical in tone. Some of the details about who you are and what you are looking for could wait until you make contact with someone who is curious about you. I also think your first sentence about "lazy people" sets a superior tone which would put some people off.
I think you have too many pics. I would also have at least one or two pics of you showing at least part of your body unclothed. I don't mean necessarily pics of you whanging your donger (or even showing it), just some visual evidence that you are seeking sex and not a date, for those who look at pics first.
Don't you think that some members seeing the username "Loveshell" might think you are a female named Shell (Michelle)?
If the bi-curious element in your makeup is as tiny as you say it is, wouldn't it be better to describe yourself as straight?
I'm not saying my own profile is perfect, indeed there's no such thing as the perfect profile, but I just had a few thoughts which you can regard as helpful or not as you wish.

27 Jul 2011

I agree with the above.
(If I MAY)..If I am honest I feel I would delete the facebook profile kind of photo and start fresh.
also I would get rid of the ashtray in bed photo as women might be scared you might start a fire and the health and safety at work act is very serious to most.
... also I would lose the cooking photo. it's great you can cook. but a cartoon t-shirt are such a no no.
..... also I'm not going say nothing about under the blossom tree
I would make profile smaller as well..Good luck.......