Need some advice from experienced swingers.
I'd like to have a chat with my partner about swinging but don't want to offend her or put her off with the first words that come out my mouth.
What's the general advice and best tips for starting a conversation like that?
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Introducing your partner to swinging
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Sex God
Quote by mr_hanky
Need some advice from experienced swingers.
I'd like to have a chat with my partner about swinging but don't want to offend her or put her off with the first words that come out my mouth.
What's the general advice and best tips for starting a conversation like that?
You know her better than us, how would anyone here know what's likely to offend her?
Might have been a good idea to talk to her before joining the site though
Sex God
Quote by Freckledbird
Might have been a good idea to talk to her before joining the site though
:thumbup: Agreed! I'm not sure how I would take it if my fella decided to introduce me to swinging and when I seen the single guy's profile he'd set up, he described himself as almost single and looking for group action!
Anyway, back to your question ....
I would say start by discussing both of your fantasies. I would make it all about her to start with so that it doesn't sound like you just want to shag other women. Discuss different scenarios with her and see how she responds. If talking/fantasising about it does nothing for her then it's probably gonna be a no go.
For us, the best time to have these discussions is straight after a right hot and steamy sex session.
Good luck, you may need it if she sees your profile!
I joined this site a few days before I told Ian but we had been having discussions for ages about joining a site so it wasn't a massive surprise. Although me sending him a text saying I'd placed an ad probably wasn't the best way of telling him :grin:
We had been talking about swinging during sex session for years. Starting with simple comments such as, how exciting would it be if someone caught us having sex so Fun is correct
:thumbup:
We had been talking about swinging during sex session for years. Starting with simple comments such as, how exciting would it be if someone caught us having sex so Fun is correct
Quote by Funlovers2009
I would say start by discussing both of your fantasies. I would make it all about her to start with so that it doesn't sound like you just want to shag other women. Discuss different scenarios with her and see how she responds. If talking/fantasising about it does nothing for her then it's probably gonna be a no go.
:thumbup:
Sex God
Think its all been said, better than I could
We started by discussing our fantasies, then we play acted them out for a long time before we joined.
We started by discussing our fantasies, then we play acted them out for a long time before we joined.
Sex God
I agree with fellow members, and I think it's pretty much all been said. You have to discuss it together and approach it together...I haven't read your profile but I suggest that you go to it and make sure that it's saying things you would like your partner to read. Then you can tell her that you've been fantasizing about whatever and show her the site, at that point you're no longer just another guy cheating on his partner....and I'm sure if she's offended by you being a member then you'll be able to make whatever decision is right for you.
Sex God
Quote by skinny
I agree with fellow members, and I think it's pretty much all been said. You have to discuss it together and approach it together...I haven't read your profile but I suggest that you go to it and make sure that it's saying things you would like your partner to read. Then you can tell her that you've been fantasizing about whatever and show her the site, at that point you're no longer just another guy cheating on his partner....and I'm sure if she's offended by you being a member then you'll be able to make whatever decision is right for you.
On the contrary, I think it would be much more entertaining and eye opening for her if she found the profile exactly as it is. Mr Hanky ..... The Christmas poo, kind of sums it up realy.
Quote by mr_hanky
Need some advice from experienced swingers.
I'd like to have a chat with my partner about swinging but don't want to offend her or put her off with the first words that come out my mouth.
What's the general advice and best tips for starting a conversation like that?
rohypnol
There is a lot on TV about swinging, from the short scene from Dirty Harry to something like Eyes Wide Shut, or was it Eyes Tight Open. Anyway plenty of chance to drop comments if you pick the right movie. There really is not need to get Behind The Green Door, if you just want to start a conversation.
Once you get to the part which refers to swinging you can make a comment. You can take it from there. Good luck too you both.
Once you get to the part which refers to swinging you can make a comment. You can take it from there. Good luck too you both.
The way it seems to work with most couples is that they arrive at the same thoughts round about the same time as each other. then its more or less easy to springboard into swinging.
in other cases there is a period of thoughtful consideration and deliberation as each comes round to the other's way of thinking and a reasonable arrangement is struck.
if you have already forged ahead and been getting into your own world of sexual adventuring, then you will need to do some doubling back. if your normal sex life is still okay, then you could find a point of origin whereupon swinging may be possible.
But if she hasn't got the slightest interest in it, and it really isn't in her nature; then it just won't happen.
But if your relationship has already gone beyond a certain point then you probably need conventional guidance if you want to restore what you had.
maybe one day you will just come straight out with it and ask her, and she might just say " i thought you'd never ask!'.................or maybe not
in other cases there is a period of thoughtful consideration and deliberation as each comes round to the other's way of thinking and a reasonable arrangement is struck.
if you have already forged ahead and been getting into your own world of sexual adventuring, then you will need to do some doubling back. if your normal sex life is still okay, then you could find a point of origin whereupon swinging may be possible.
But if she hasn't got the slightest interest in it, and it really isn't in her nature; then it just won't happen.
But if your relationship has already gone beyond a certain point then you probably need conventional guidance if you want to restore what you had.
maybe one day you will just come straight out with it and ask her, and she might just say " i thought you'd never ask!'.................or maybe not
Sexpert
"I had this dream last night...we both went to a swinging party...it wasn't the cheesy kind...more erotic...we had a greeeeeat time together...it's kinda strange and oddly arousing..."
...then discuss
...then discuss
