Is swinging the last bastion of prejudice and discrimination

3 Jun 2010

Quote by Lost

Nobody has given an answer that fully elucidates this "matter of choice" statement made to satisfy the basic why.

Just because you like someone socially does not mean that you will find them attractive sexually. Someone has already stated that they have yet to find a black guy who they have found attractive. Some will look at a white guy and find them attractive where looking at a black guy they cannot feel the same way, and vice versa. They will still work with them, live next to them, go out socially with them but not shag them. How would that make them racist? They do not hate them, would not harm them, would not say a bad word against them........just not shag them as there is no physical attraction.
Dave_Notts

3 Jun 2010

Quote by Kaznkev
Its called, closet racism.
I cannot accept that one does not find another race of people attractive, i find all women attractive hispanic, white, polish, russian, thai, indian, black, im sure those white people and ladies that say oooh sorry no blacks or asians or whatever are the above, thats my opinion and the way i see it.
Its like i said, how can someone say they dont want to meet an asian person or black person but yet sit there tanning the hell out of themselves in the sun or sunbed with skin as dark as them lol, makes no sense.

Neither does this post by you.
It's perfectly possible for an individual's preferences to be shaped by racial stereotypes even while the individual isn't themselves racist - hence the idea that all black guys are well hung bulls who know how to treat a woman. Now some people will undoubtedly tell me that they base their preference on experience, but there's a hell of a lot of literature out there, especially from the US, that makes clear that there are political tensions and stereotypes underpinning the preference for some people as well. I know of no evidence that black men do have big cocks or more stamina, but it presses buttons for a significant number of women.
But at the end of the day it's only a preference, not a qualification. If someone doesn't fancy large slightly balding white guys in their forties I don't scream discrimination,I just move on.
BTW, the fact that you say you find all women attractive may not make the search for a partner harder for you; it doesn't make a woman feel especially valued if you tell her that as well as fancying her, you fancy Hilary Clinton, Mother Teresa. Margaret Thatcher and so on.
What if you have a fetish for just that type of man, is that discrimination? innocent

I think it's called bloody good luck as far as I'm concerned

3 Jun 2010

Quote by Islandcpl1
Then why if a person outside of the scene is considered to be prejudiced when he/she chooses not to mix with socialy or otherwise a person of a different colour? But yet within the scen its deemed to be a choice?

Stop changing the discussion when you find yourself unable to justify the point you are trying to make. The original point was about having sex with, not mixing with socially.

Quote by Islandcpl1
Just because you seem to think that I stand alone in thinking like this on this matter does not make me wrong. I know when I'm right. I have no issue with either my looks, personality, stamina or techiques.

No, you may believe you are right but that doesn't make it so. I believe that I'm right but am open minded enough to discuss issues with the possibility of having that belief changed by rational argument or by being given information I didn't previously have.

Quote by Islandcpl1
Its amazing how a simple question gets such a convaluted answer, rather like a politician procrastinating in order not to answer!

Hardly a simple question when it changes to suit your argument. As procrastinating means wasting time perhaps I am; after all you know you are right.

3 Jun 2010

Quote by Dave__Notts

Nobody has given an answer that fully elucidates this "matter of choice" statement made to satisfy the basic why.

Just because you like someone socially does not mean that you will find them attractive sexually. Someone has already stated that they have yet to find a black guy who they have found attractive. Some will look at a white guy and find them attractive where looking at a black guy they cannot feel the same way, and vice versa. They will still work with them, live next to them, go out socially with them but not shag them. How would that make them racist? They do not hate them, would not harm them, would not say a bad word against them........just not shag them as there is no physical attraction.
Dave_Notts
Dave i would just like to say that I in no way said or suggested the things highlighted in bold, I purposely omitted any words of that nature. Thats a different discussion
Where i personally find the problem in that I guess having been in relationships with other colour I cant see why a difference in colour makes a difference in how one can feel sexually. I mean why? That still hasn't been explained.
The thread title uses the words prejudice and discrimination and in choosing a person sexually or in any other way then the choice is prejudicial and discriminatory in some way. It may seem like it is taking it to a smaller degree but it is.
Dave you say racist in your reply. The last thing that I am suggesting is racist and the definition of racist is far far different from prejudice and discrimination. Please understand that this is not about hate. By definition this is about omitting the possibility of sex with a person of a different colour because of that persons colour.

3 Jun 2010

Quote by Lost
Where i personally find the problem in that I guess having been in relationships with other colour I cant see why a difference in colour makes a difference in how one can feel sexually. I mean why? That still hasn't been explained.

It makes no difference to me, I'm either attracted to someone or I'm not but their colour isn't an issue. Their personality is an issue, their personal hygiene is an issue but their colour, shape, size and age is not. However it is a fact that some women do prefer black guys, whether this is for aesthetic reasons, fantasy realisation or based on previous good experiences I don't know. I see it as their choice unless there is something to make me believe it is prejudice.

Quote by Lost
The thread title uses the words prejudice and discrimination and in choosing a person sexually or in any other way then the choice is prejudicial and discriminatory in some way. It may seem like it is taking it to a smaller degree but it is.

I disagree. You chose to use the second definition of prejudice 'any preconceived opinion or feeling, either favorable or unfavorable' in an earlier post. I believe most people would be happier with the first definition 'an unfavorable opinion or feeling formed beforehand or without knowledge, thought, or reason'. If a decision who to play with is not formed beforehand or made without knowledge, thought and reason it isn't prejudice, it is preference.

3 Jun 2010

This thread has reminded me what this country has become.
A mad politically correct bag of shite. wink

If anyone does not want to play with someone because of their colour, then that is THEIR choice and nobody else's.
It does not in my book constitute being labeled a racist by anyone, but you only have to look at peoples arguements on here to realise the word " racist " is used to push their own feelings, when a normal arguement would be lost.
Would this actually have been an issue IF a white person had said it is racist because a black or Asian person did not want to play with them? Of course not.....don't be so silly.

3 Jun 2010

Quote by kentswingers777
This thread has reminded me what this country has become.
A mad politically correct bag of shite.
If anyone does not want to play with someone because of their colour, then that is THEIR choice and nobody else's.
It does not in my book constitute being labeled a racist by anyone, but you only have to look at peoples arguements on here to realise the word " racist " is used to push their own feelings, when a normal arguement would be lost.
Would this actually have been an issue IF a white person had said it is racist because a black or Asian person did not want to play with them? Of course not.....don't be so silly.

777 for gods sake! stop harping on about racist no ones going on about hate in this thread!

3 Jun 2010

Sorry Losty I could have sworn that someone used that word to describe people who refuse to meet someone because of colour....my mistake matey. wink

In fact the word " racist or racism " has been used 19 times by others....sorry those words obviously confused me.
IF someone was prejudiced against say swinging with a black guy, then surely that is also racist in the eyes of the righteous?

3 Jun 2010

Quote by Unc_Mids

Where i personally find the problem in that I guess having been in relationships with other colour I cant see why a difference in colour makes a difference in how one can feel sexually. I mean why? That still hasn't been explained.

It makes no difference to me, I'm either attracted to someone or I'm not but their colour isn't an issue. Their personality is an issue, their personal hygiene is an issue but their colour, shape, size and age is not. However it is a fact that some women do prefer black guys, whether this is for aesthetic reasons, fantasy realisation or based on previous good experiences I don't know. I see it as their choice unless there is something to make me believe it is prejudice.

Quote by Lost
The thread title uses the words prejudice and discrimination and in choosing a person sexually or in any other way then the choice is prejudicial and discriminatory in some way. It may seem like it is taking it to a smaller degree but it is.

I disagree. You chose to use the second definition of prejudice 'any preconceived opinion or feeling, either favorable or unfavorable' in an earlier post. I believe most people would be happier with the first definition 'an unfavorable opinion or feeling formed beforehand or without knowledge, thought, or reason'. If a decision who to play with is not formed beforehand or made without knowledge, thought and reason it isn't prejudice, it is preference.
I agree unc but.......What about those who state that they will not play with black or white whichever, with knowledge and thought, though the reason might not be conciously known. Thats what this is about in the end. asking the question why there is a decision that would make one colour acceptable to have sex with and another not.
As for the definitions in they are still there and still valid
I guess its a subject that might be uncomfortable to explore and thats why the statement "Its a matter of personal choice" is about as far as people might want to delve into the psyche of it all, and I guess a subject not wholly suitable here. Would be a good subject for college thesis I think though.

3 Jun 2010

Quote by Unc_Mids
. As procrastinating means wasting time perhaps I am; after all you know you are right.

Nipping to the loo every five minutes disturbed sleep 's a pain A lot of men have a problem with their procrastinate gland after the age of around 40 but nowadays its not so much of a trauma to go to your GP for help
Hope thats a help :thumbup:
biggrin

3 Jun 2010

Which is what exactly?

3 Jun 2010

So your wrong, theres a reason for preference.
Yes there is and its called PERSONAL PREFERENCE and PERSONAL CHOICE.
It doesn`t have to be "racist" because you decide not to play with someone, I think thats an easy and judgmental thing to say. I`ve met both white guys and black guys on here and my PERSONAL PREFERENCE is for a white guy my age because I PERSONALLY don`t like younger guys, not skinny coz I PERSONALLY don`t like skinny guys, see this is MY CHOICE. I don`t have to look any deeper than that into my personal psyche.
And to be honest it wouldn`t bother me if anyone was slightly offended by that as we have already seen threads damning us BBW`s, older swingers etc but hey that is THEIR CHOICE also.
Do you see what most of us are trying to say, do ya?????

3 Jun 2010

Can I start a book as to whether he see's it or not?

3 Jun 2010

Quote by Gillianthe1st
Can I start a book as to whether he see's it or not?

No, cause you would definately win a fortune wink

3 Jun 2010

So what is being said here then? lol

:lol:

3 Jun 2010

Quote by kentswingers777
So what is being said here then? :lol:

I think its the how kinky can you get section

3 Jun 2010

Quote by skanders
This thread has reminded me what this country has become.
A mad politically correct bag of shite.
If anyone does not want to play with someone because of their colour, then that is THEIR choice and nobody else's.
It does not in my book constitute being labeled a racist by anyone, but you only have to look at peoples arguements on here to realise the word " racist " is used to push their own feelings, when a normal arguement would be lost.
Would this actually have been an issue IF a white person had said it is racist because a black or Asian person did not want to play with them? Of course not.....don't be so silly.

actually that would be racist if it happened the other way round, again why does skin colour come into it, its only skin either they are fit or not no matter what colour, then why have a preference, its like me saying oooh i prefer asian women to white women, why would i prefer this if i find a girl attractive fantastic i dont give a damn about colour, ive been with white girls, asian girls and black girls and theres no difference they are all the same each have their mood swings and pet hates and what have ya.
theres no difference.
So your wrong, theres a reason for preference.
But will Mummy and Daddy be expecting you to marry a nice asian girl though...so your shagging your way through all the races till then?

3 Jun 2010

Quote by skanders
This thread has reminded me what this country has become.
A mad politically correct bag of shite.
If anyone does not want to play with someone because of their colour, then that is THEIR choice and nobody else's.
It does not in my book constitute being labeled a racist by anyone, but you only have to look at peoples arguements on here to realise the word " racist " is used to push their own feelings, when a normal arguement would be lost.
Would this actually have been an issue IF a white person had said it is racist because a black or Asian person did not want to play with them? Of course not.....don't be so silly.

actually that would be racist if it happened the other way round, again why does skin colour come into it, its only skin either they are fit or not no matter what colour, then why have a preference, its like me saying oooh i prefer asian women to white women, why would i prefer this if i find a girl attractive fantastic i dont give a damn about colour, ive been with white girls, asian girls and black girls and theres no difference they are all the same each have their mood swings and pet hates and what have ya.
theres no difference.
So your wrong, theres a reason for preference.
This thread is brilliant. It's like watching a bloke who hasn't mastered a paint by numbers kit trying to critique the Mona Lisa while someone else rants about all art being shit....

3 Jun 2010

I bet they have a preference though.
I work with an Indian whose parents are not racist either apparently but....his Father was mortified when in his words " a white western girl " shacked up with his Son.
He wanted his Son to settle down with a nice Indian girl, and make lots of babies.
1989? No not at all..........2006.

3 Jun 2010

No wonder you dont get any meets.

4 Jun 2010

Quote by skanders
I bet they have a preference though.
I work with an Indian whose parents are not racist either apparently but....his Father was mortified when in his words " a white western girl " shacked up with his Son.
He wanted his Son to settle down with a nice Indian girl, and make lots of babies.
1989? No not at all..........2006.

LOL no they dont have a preference at all, they dont mind who i marry.
Great you work with an indian who is a backward parent.
But do they own a beautiful launderette? Or maybe they'd only want a son to bend it like Beckham? This thread is, without doubt, beyond parody despite the best intentions of some very bright, very patient people who've given a good deal of time to it.

4 Jun 2010

as i see it , its not about prejudice of size or shape,looks or anything else, its about personal taste, some like a larger woman or man others don`t,some like a man or woman smooth all over and again others don`t. theres no point in getting involved with anybody that does`nt attract for the sake of sex?? not for us. we much prefer some mutual attraction. eating with your eyes first is all part of the meal for us...call it the starter.
TandJ

4 Jun 2010

Quote by Lost
. As procrastinating means wasting time perhaps I am; after all you know you are right.

Nipping to the loo every five minutes disturbed sleep 's a pain A lot of men have a problem with their procrastinate gland after the age of around 40 but nowadays its not so much of a trauma to go to your GP for help
Hope thats a help :thumbup:
biggrin

Perfect timing Lost! I read this just after getting back from my GP and having a DRE:-) You must have crystal balls lol

4 Jun 2010

Quote by Kaznkev
A side point perhaps,but one i wanted to make.
The argument about preference/prejudice is interesting in so far as we all have unconscious prejudices that are a function of our race/upbringing/age/class/shoe size/time of the deny this is ti deny the fact humans are complex creatures.

Bang on the money ladywomanfemgirl thang :bounce:

8 Jun 2010

Quote by skanders
no i dont see it, if ive always been told im an attractive guy why should it be any different on here, sent 100s of emails no response not one of those people is interested not even a no thanks how lazy and rude.
guess i have to accept asian guys are not wanted, never mind i wish i lived in an asian town maybe i could find the asian girl that ive always wanted, end of the day i have to admit i would be better off as they are better women.

Get over yaself fgs.
You are having trouble getting meets, get used to it and stop playing the " race card "!!
There are plenty of guys and couples come to that, that struggle to get meets.
That is what really pisses me off nowadays, if something does not go your way then it is because I am Asian........crap and you know it.
We do not often reply to e mails as when we place an advert we state exactly the kind of guy we are looking for. We do not go for overweight guys but they still reply so we do not bother replying if they cannot be bothered to read what we have written.
That obviously makes us " lazy and rude " and you know what? I do not give a flying fuck ( cheers Benny lol

).
We meet black guys but not Asian guys....her choice. IF in your world that makes us racist then I will not lose a seconds sleep over it, and I have been called a lot worse on here.:shock:
You really do have a bad attitude or are you simply just looking for a quick fuck on here?
I bet your the kind of guy that when anything goes wrong in your life it is because of your colour.....it is not and the sooner you realise that one the better for you.

8 Jun 2010

Quote by skanders
no i dont see it, if ive always been told im an attractive guy why should it be any different on here, sent 100s of emails no response not one of those people is interested not even a no thanks how lazy and rude.
guess i have to accept asian guys are not wanted, never mind i wish i lived in an asian town maybe i could find the asian girl that ive always wanted, end of the day i have to admit i would be better off as they are better women.

It's not lazy and rude, when you consider how many emails they get. You keep playing the race card, when in fact, people may just not like the sound of you. If your posts on here are typical of your attitude, then I'd suggest it's you who has the problem.
Oh, and your comment about asian women could be considered racist - and if any non-asian female has been reading your forum posts, I reckon you have little chance now.

Quote by skanders
no i dont actually ive never blamed anything on my race, been on 2 different swinging websites both free like this and had the same experience, same with many other asian dudes, its a case of too many chavs are attracted to them hence bigots and fascists some are clever at hiding it and saying it in a clever way.

You blame your lack of swinging meets on your race. You have done since you started posting. You're as racist as they come - you're obviously not as clever at hiding it.

8 Jun 2010

Quote by skanders
no i dont see it, if ive always been told im an attractive guy why should it be any different on here, sent 100s of emails no response not one of those people is interested not even a no thanks how lazy and rude.
guess i have to accept asian guys are not wanted, never mind i wish i lived in an asian town maybe i could find the asian girl that ive always wanted, end of the day i have to admit i would be better off as they are better women.

Haven't your parents done that for you...or hasn't she been born yet?
and then you finish it with exactly why white people won't swing with you and probably many asian guys for that fact, your attitude is obviously that, they are easy fucks...whislt you wait for so called better asian girl to marry.

Quote by skanders
no i dont actually ive never blamed anything on my race, been on 2 different swinging websites both free like this and had the same experience, same with many other asian dudes, its a case of too many chavs are attracted to them hence bigots and fascists some are clever at hiding it and saying it in a clever way.

so your not racist...isn't that remark considered racist these days
you have the biggest chip i've seen on here, and quite frankly also the thickest, you clearly haven't listened to anything anyone say said...and still keep throwing in the race card.

8 Jun 2010

I am beginning to warm to you Powers. wink

:therethere:

8 Jun 2010

Quote by skanders
no i dont see it, if ive always been told im an attractive guy why should it be any different on here, sent 100s of emails no response not one of those people is interested not even a no thanks how lazy and rude.
guess i have to accept asian guys are not wanted, never mind i wish i lived in an asian town maybe i could find the asian girl that ive always wanted, end of the day i have to admit i would be better off as they are better women.

Putting to one side the fact your postings break the AUP, I find you and your racist attitude grossly offensive to all free-thinkers and you are doing a great disservice to other Asians by playing the race card when you don't get your way. By all means flounce but spare us the crocodile tears.
Labelling those who choose to not meet with you bigots and fascists is a very low blow indeed.
And then from your profile which is frankly laughable:

"NO TIMEWASTERS", I have a nice body and a big cock, if you are on here to get fucked then stop messing around and get fucked if not delete your account, im sick of women on here who are "oooh should i or shouldnt i, i want this i want that" ffs grow up.

You clearly don't cut the swinging mustard Sir and I would suggest you gracefully retire as you are publicly making yourself look a right tit.

8 Jun 2010

Oh how at times I wish this was my site.....
There would be a whole host on Woo's island. lol