Jiggle needs yet more advice

11 Apr 2005

Hi all,
I've got a sort of dilema.
excuss the waffle if i start.
this evening, i was busy chatting away on my PC as usual, when my Brothers Girlfriend and her mate came round. i said my ellos and buried my head back into the PC. i could hear the laugher in the background and occasionly poped my head round to shout a sarcy comment across the room, when she told me i was being VERY unsocialbe, and that i shouldbe sitting with then chatting instead of using the PC. so i Reluctently switch off the PC.. well with her help! redface

anyway.. i chatting for 2 mins then disapeared into the kitchen. about 2 mins later she followed me in. nd we was chatting,and she moaned again about me doing the whole insocialbe thing. we started chatting and she said that she liked me for a while.... which took me back, cause that was the first time i had seen her (later found out that she has been around the house a few times but i had been to busy on the PC to notice her) .
anyway what i'm trying to say is, that ive got the change to start date a very nice looking woman..and in an ideal world i would jump at the chance. but like always Jiggle comes with complications. one of these being swinging...
as many that know me, i really enjoy the Social side to Swinging, getting out and meeting very open minded people and having wild nights out. and i'm not sure i could give this up for a "vanilla" realtionship. but on the other hand and i turning down something that could turn out to be good.
FFS.. why does my head have to do these sort fo things to me!

11 Apr 2005

You could:
her openly that you are a swinger.... however it's your brother's girlfriend's friend confused

so do you wan tthe details getting back?
2. Be a killjoy and say that these kind of relationships don't work out when there are close family members involved ie. in this one your brother being her mate's boyfriend. Anything you do will be discussed between her and her pal which will then go back to your brother, like it or not. Can you handle this and can he handle this?
3. Ride it out and see where it leads
4. Make it a casual thing (ie shags and nights out but not a girlfriend boyfriend let's get married tomoorow thingie) and see if she seems worth giving all this up for a couple of weeks/ months. If not then it isn't going to work long term.
5. Go for it hook line and sinker. Give SH up, deactivate and never look back. Develop a deep and meaningful relationship with her, live together, get married, have babies and live happily ever after.
Only you knows what is right for you. It's not as if by being single right now means you are never going get a long-term real life girlfriend. You are young and have loads ahead of you to be able to take a few risks if you so choose to. If it doesn't work out, you can at least say you tried.
Just a few suggestions there for you to mull over Jigsy. call if you want a chat.
passionkiss

Gem. x

11 Apr 2005

Go for it, you'll never know unless you try.
That's just my opinion, but whatever happens don't forget to stay in touch with ya mates here!

11 Apr 2005

I would take the chance and see what she is like. If you date her to see how it goes, if you get on etc, you can find out if she is your kind of girl without commitment - just make sure she knows it is on a loose basis..

11 Apr 2005

I say just give it a go.
Might be the woman of your dreams and if not, then SH and swinging will always be here for you to come back to. It doesn't mean you have to give up the site, just take a back-step, maybe. Lots of people have done it. rolleyes

If the relationship does develop further then you'll know whether or not or you want to continue with this lifestyle or not.
Go with your heart, matey! Things are only as complicated as you make them.

11 Apr 2005

Quote by Marya
Go with your heart, matey! Things are only as complicated as you make them.

Soooooooooo true!

11 Apr 2005

But.....can any of us really see Jiggle away from at least the social side of SH for anything more than a week(sorry for talking as tho you are not here Jiggle).I think this a real tough one for someone like you Jiggle....whatever you decide,good luck!

12 Apr 2005

I would suggest that you're honest with her about your swinging but ask her not to say anything ..... and then she'll know exactly where she stands and whether she wants to start a relationship with you or not....

12 Apr 2005

Go for it...... Swingers come and go... True friends will always be true friends.
But that special lady may only come along once...and if you dont try you will never know if it is her! I wouldnt say anything straight away...just see how it pans out. Then tell her when you feel comfortable...(Just dont leave it too long!)
You dont know how you will feel about swinging when you are with her anyway.... so there is no point worrying about it until then is there ???? lol

Good luck mate!

12 Apr 2005

Quote by PeBbLeSDeMoN
But.....can any of us really see Jiggle away from at least the social side of SH for anything more than a week(sorry for talking as tho you are not here Jiggle).I think this a real tough one for someone like you Jiggle....whatever you decide,good luck!

you know me so well xxxxxxxxxxxx
but i'm gonna take a chance... nothing ventured nothing gained... and going by my past record of realtionships it will most probably go tits up by the end of the week!.
but sadly for you lot, i'm not gonna be giving up the chatroom & forum.. the only way you'll get rid of me will be through a ban!!! lol (and no you mods can't i'd cry!).
I've arranged to meet her this evening, so i will know more then!..
thank you all for your advice!.... i'm started to get quite a pain with it!...
Jiggle

12 Apr 2005

Ooooh good luck Jiggle kiss

Like you said, stay on the forums/chatroom, see how you and the new girlfriend get on. If all goes really well and gets serious, then you can re-evaluate everything again.
Once again, good luck hunny, she's a lucky girl cool

:kiss:

12 Apr 2005

jiggle my old matey..... i am glad that this came up....because in a sense i am now in almost the same situation..... mine just happens to be someone who hasn't seen in 4 yrs... and found me again thru a lady friend who i speak to online..her friend showed her the site, she show her my picture and said "i know him!!!!!" so in a way as least she already knows.....and she says that she fancied me back then but was with someone.....
we spoke on the phone last night and the upshot is that we are going out tomorrow evening....so see how it goes....
if you don't give it a go you will only wonder "if only...." and it'll haunt you....when you know her better then tell her about the site........
sean xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

12 Apr 2005

Quote by Marya
I say just give it a go.
Might be the woman of your dreams and if not, then SH and swinging will always be here for you to come back to. It doesn't mean you have to give up the site, just take a back-step, maybe. Lots of people have done it.
If the relationship does develop further then you'll know whether or not or you want to continue with this lifestyle or not.
Go with your heart, matey! Things are only as complicated as you make them.

:cheers: :cheers: :cheers: :cheers:
Go date her amd see where it leads. There's nothing written in stone that says you have to tell her you're involved in swinging on the first date.
STOP TRYING TO FIND REASONS NOT TO GO OUT WITH HER AND TAKE A FLAMING CHANCE!
If it doesn't work out then no harm done. If it does, then ask her along to a Munch. If she trusts your judgement, she'll come. ;)
Edit* Or exactly what Sean said above :roll:
Oh BTW Sean hope it goes well for you. :thumbup:

12 Apr 2005

My advice would prolly be the least u will take notice of.... but i will have a go from experience...
I say go for it!!!!! U would be silly not too.....
Not everything revolves around swinging... Just because u meet some1, it doesn't mean u can't still speak to the friends u have made in the scene.
I'm extremely happy with my fella, i still find time to chat with the lovely friends i have made over the last 6 months altho it isn't as often now. Ok, i don't have any plans of playing at mo but that doesn't mean i can't attend parties and munches. In fact, it's great to meet up with them and see how there getting on.
Good Luck

12 Apr 2005

Go for it....
I mean, how often does someone arrive in your living room, saying they like you? only happens to me when i'm dreaming (usally waking up later, with a damp patch rolleyes

:shock: ...)
And if things go well with her, there is nothing to stop you coming in the chatroom in an evening??

12 Apr 2005

Just ask her if she's got another mate who might fancy a threesome bolt

12 Apr 2005

Quote by Lil_Bunny
Go for it, you'll never know unless you try.
That's just my opinion, but whatever happens don't forget to stay in touch with ya mates here!

Some good advice here Jiggle, go for it and see what happens.
John
smile

17 Apr 2005

Sooooooooooooooooo?????????
Did Jiggle go for it? What happened? Where did they go? What did they do? Does she give good head?????
Where is he????

17 Apr 2005

Errr... what does yer brother think about this?? May be a line to clear there before agonising over whether you give up swinging - your brother is kin and probably the most important thing in the equation.
If he's OK with it then go for it. A good loving relationship has got to be worth a lot - no question.

17 Apr 2005

Quote by Marya
Sooooooooooooooooo?????????
Did Jiggle go for it? What happened? Where did they go? What did they do? Does she give good head?????
Where is he????

Jiggle is here!
lets just say all never went to plan, not that anthing in my life ever does!. so for this moment in time i'll not be giving up anything!...espially my SINGLE life
Jiggle

17 Apr 2005

Awwww Jiggle sad

:therethere: :therethere: :therethere:
We all love you kiss

:rose:

17 Apr 2005

Hi Jiggle,
I thnink you should give the relatioship a go, take it slow, think you should be honest and tell her about the swinging side, that way you are being honest and up front from the beginning.
You never know it may be the start of something really good, but if you dont give it a go you will never know.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

17 Apr 2005

m8
sometimes in life u just got 2 bite the bullet and go 4 it
if it blows up in ur face then move on plenty more fish and all that