My sister bought me a really funny book for my birthday, 'Things we used to believe'.
Ands it basically full of stuff our parents used to tell us.
My favourites are
'If I played with my weiner, it would fall off'
'If I sucked my thumb, it would turn green and fall off'
'If I swallowed chewing gum, it would stick my insides together'
There are loads, and I rememeber most of them from either my gran or my mum!!!
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mothers tales
children are to be seen and not heard
stick in at school or youl turn out like ya father
dont smoke its bad for ya
get to bed
ya nose will grow if ya lie
play on the black heaps and black men come out and grap ya
eating carrots makes ya see in the dark
you cant have a pet ya fathers a dog go pet him
santa claus is reala stork is bringing your baby sister or brother
also got the usual eat ya crusts it will make ya hair curl, burnt toast puts hairs on ya chest, youl get buck teeth if ya suck ya thumb, clean pants makes ya a good girl, il get the soapy water out if i hear ya swearing again missy,
probly loads more just cant remember them all
(my mother hated my father btw) :shock:
stick in at school or youl turn out like ya father
dont smoke its bad for ya
get to bed
ya nose will grow if ya lie
play on the black heaps and black men come out and grap ya
eating carrots makes ya see in the dark
you cant have a pet ya fathers a dog go pet him
santa claus is reala stork is bringing your baby sister or brother
also got the usual eat ya crusts it will make ya hair curl, burnt toast puts hairs on ya chest, youl get buck teeth if ya suck ya thumb, clean pants makes ya a good girl, il get the soapy water out if i hear ya swearing again missy,
probly loads more just cant remember them all
(my mother hated my father btw) :shock:
Sex God
My Nan told me when the tide goes out it's god pulling the plug out. :shock:
Sex God
For some reason and still to this day without fail, whenever we eat peanuts my mum will say 'chew them well now!'
Only for peanuts mind!
mxx
Only for peanuts mind!
mxx
Master of Sex
I've been told most of the above (no wonder I'm so screwed up!)
One thing that my nana used to say to me when I was a little girl and having a go at peeling spuds ... "Don't make the peelings too thick - there are starving children in India you know!"
:
Always puzzled me, that one.
Sugar xx
One thing that my nana used to say to me when I was a little girl and having a go at peeling spuds ... "Don't make the peelings too thick - there are starving children in India you know!"
: Always puzzled me, that one.
Sugar xx
Sex God
Quote by Sugar-n-pom
I've been told most of the above (no wonder I'm so screwed up!)
One thing that my nana used to say to me when I was a little girl and having a go at peeling spuds ... "Don't make the peelings too thick - there are starving children in India you know!"
Always puzzled me, that one.
Sugar xx
We were told the starving children were all in Africa in my house....
Warming the Bed
i was always told to put clean underwear on b4 i went out cos you never know, you could get run over me.
Always puzzled me cos if i got run over my undies would no longer be clean anyway.
pmsl
just incase you're wondering i always have clean undies on anyway lol
Always puzzled me cos if i got run over my undies would no longer be clean anyway.
pmsl
just incase you're wondering i always have clean undies on anyway lol
Quote by firelizard
My Nan told me when the tide goes out it's god pulling the plug out. :shock:
And according to my mum, thunder was god climbing the stairs to go to bed- lightning was him switching the light on.
During a particularly lengthy storm one night, I came to the conclusion that God had O.C.D.
Orgasminator
Everybody has said pretty much the same things i was told as a kid 
I really love the saying " if u fall & break ya legs dont come running 2 me" :lol:
I really love the saying " if u fall & break ya legs dont come running 2 me" :lol: 
Sex God
"This is hurting me alot more than it hurts you"
never understood that as a kid but now....im starting to understand how much it must hurt
never understood that as a kid but now....im starting to understand how much it must hurt
i'll explain when your old enough to understand
if its raining god is having a pee if its sleet god is having a wank if its snowing god is pooing its its windy god has got farts god is happy when its sunny cloudy means he is confused thunder and lightning means god is madalthough that one was slightly edited when we were younger
babies come from a nut that you eat and it turns into a baby in your tummy and comes our your bum :shock:
sit to close to that telly n your eyes will go square
santa can see everything your doing and if your naughty he wont get you any presents this year
dont stand over the fire ya bum will boil
dont pick ya nose ya brains will fall out
i often wonder if you where switched at birth :shock:
woohoo 500 posts am i half a gobshite yet
if its raining god is having a pee if its sleet god is having a wank if its snowing god is pooing its its windy god has got farts god is happy when its sunny cloudy means he is confused thunder and lightning means god is madalthough that one was slightly edited when we were younger
babies come from a nut that you eat and it turns into a baby in your tummy and comes our your bum :shock:
sit to close to that telly n your eyes will go square
santa can see everything your doing and if your naughty he wont get you any presents this year
dont stand over the fire ya bum will boil
dont pick ya nose ya brains will fall out
i often wonder if you where switched at birth :shock:
woohoo 500 posts am i half a gobshite yet
