Munch attendees?

11 Feb 2005

Quote by steveg_nw
It wouldn't bother me in the slightest if they were to attend a munch but I would have to put a caveat...............
Munches are social meets that are held in public places and as such any openly gay behaviour that wouldn't normally be accepted in that public place probably wouldn't be accepted on a munch night either. The people attending a munch might be open minded but it doesn't necessarily follow that everyone there will be. Whilst we all have different ideas about what acceptable behaviour should be in public places many landlords and their staff will decide that two guys openly snogging away in the middle of their pub is beyond acceptance and I doubt the guys would be staying very long.
I'm not saying they would act that way, just that if they did I can imagine the response.
Steve

Actually Steve I don't think that caveat should apply.
Two men openly snogging in a bar should not be any more unacceptable than a heterosexual couple snogging. For a landlord to take offense would be completely unacceptable and I would hope unacceptable to the majority of Swinging Heaven members!
Acceptable public behavior should be the same regardless of the gender or sexuality of the people concerned and I'm a little confused why you felt it necessary to bring this up.

Roger the Dragon.

11 Feb 2005

Quote by Reese
If anyone here has a problem with a gay couple attending a munch I think they seriously have to ask themselves do they think they are in the right place.

What he said. :thumbup:
~Reese! surprised

We have no objections to anyone atending munchies.
We will chat to anyone on here or at a munch smile

If they are friendly to us we will be back :)
Carol and fred

11 Feb 2005

well as i have not been to a munch yet but i hope to one day cool

all i can say from what i have seen on the posting for munches is that anyone is allowed to go as long as they are clean happy and enjoy meeting people, and are wanting to put faces to names. So i don't see how if a gay couple went along as long as they were not groping and kissing in a corner or at the bar :embarrased: confused

: as long as they just chilled 8-) chatted and had a good laugh drinkies

:cheers:
then i cannot see a problem with who went.
i hope to see some of you all soon at a munch somewhere soon or maybe at a club kiss

or maybe just out there in the big wide world
bye for now love to all mollman :taz:

11 Feb 2005

Quote by rogerthedragon
It wouldn't bother me in the slightest if they were to attend a munch but I would have to put a caveat...............
Munches are social meets that are held in public places and as such any openly gay behaviour that wouldn't normally be accepted in that public place probably wouldn't be accepted on a munch night either. The people attending a munch might be open minded but it doesn't necessarily follow that everyone there will be. Whilst we all have different ideas about what acceptable behaviour should be in public places many landlords and their staff will decide that two guys openly snogging away in the middle of their pub is beyond acceptance and I doubt the guys would be staying very long.
I'm not saying they would act that way, just that if they did I can imagine the response.
Steve

Actually Steve I don't think that caveat should apply.
Two men openly snogging in a bar should not be any more unacceptable than a heterosexual couple snogging. For a landlord to take offense would be completely unacceptable and I would hope unacceptable to the majority of Swinging Heaven members!
Acceptable public behavior should be the same regardless of the gender or sexuality of the people concerned and I'm a little confused why you felt it necessary to bring this up.

Roger the Dragon.
The way I read it, Steve wasn't saying the caveat should apply, simply pointing out that it does for the reasons explained. Newcomers might not be aware that the owners of munch venues are not site members, and their (the owners') ideas of what constitutes acceptable behaviour on their premises might not tally with ours.

11 Feb 2005

it wouldnt bother me at all what sexually orientation a person is ,if i judged people on their sexual preferences what would that make me after all i have my own kind of sexual i say if there was a gay couple i would welcome them in and be as sociable as i can be with a hetrosexual couple.

11 Feb 2005

Quote by Ice Pie
The way I read it, Steve wasn't saying the caveat should apply, simply pointing out that it does for the reasons explained. Newcomers might not be aware that the owners of munch venues are not site members, and their (the owners') ideas of what constitutes acceptable behaviour on their premises might not tally with ours.

As far as I am aware evicting or banning two men because they were gay, and kissing in a public bar would in itself be legally unacceptable. I am not sure of this but someone else may be able to enlighten me.
I do not see that a Landlord has any more right to object to two men kissing than to anyone else. At the two munches I have been to previously there have been some bi-sexual men snogging and so far there has been no need to warn them about it. I am curious why the matter has come up now.
Roger.

11 Feb 2005

Quote by rogerthedragon
The way I read it, Steve wasn't saying the caveat should apply, simply pointing out that it does for the reasons explained. Newcomers might not be aware that the owners of munch venues are not site members, and their (the owners') ideas of what constitutes acceptable behaviour on their premises might not tally with ours.

As far as I am aware evicting or banning two men because they were gay, and kissing in a public bar would in itself be legally unacceptable. I am not sure of this but someone else may be able to enlighten me.
I do not see that a Landlord has any more right to object to two men kissing than to anyone else. At the two munches I have been to previously there have been some bi-sexual men snogging and so far there has been no need to warn them about it. I am curious why the matter has come up now.
Roger.
The landlord has the right to eject anyone from the premises with or without a reason. I'm not getting into a moral argument about it, just pointing out that people going to their first munch might not know that our rules don't necessarily apply.

11 Feb 2005

Quote by Ice Pie
The landlord has the right to eject anyone from the premises with or without a reason. I'm not getting into a moral argument about it, just pointing out that people going to their first munch might not know that our rules don't necessarily apply.

OK, fair enough. However I personally would object very strongly if two men were ejected for kissing - or anyone else for that matter. (Actual sexual activity is a different matter entirely and is not what I am talking about) If this situation arose I would walk out of the venue and to be perfectly honest I would expect to not be the only one. I would also think that the Munch organisers had made a bad choice with regards to their choice of venue - in my opinion to object to two men or two women kissing in public is homophobic and bigoted!
Roger.

11 Feb 2005

I think it's safe to say that if a munch pub landlord did do this, it would be very unlikely that they would ever get our business again, and quite likely that we'd all walk out in sympathy too.
For what it's worth, there was a gay couple on the Essex munch guest list, but they couldn't make it to the event for some reason or other. I didn't bat an eyelid at this, and I think the rest of us wouldn't either.

11 Feb 2005

There was lots of mm and ff snogging at the Essex munch, I didn't hear anyone complaining, I think they were too busy watching lol

11 Feb 2005

Quote by Sarah1448
There was lots of mm and ff snogging at the Essex munch, I didn't hear anyone complaining, I think they were too busy watching

:cry: I missed that then :cry:
I was probably being my usual shy self though, hiding in a corner or the loos. :lol:
Bev
xx

11 Feb 2005

Not having been to a munch, I just took it for granted that there would be people of all sexual orientation attending. In fact if gays were excluded then I think that I would rather not be a part of some homeophobic gathering. confused

Although I have never tried anything with another man I would not deny that if the possibility arose I would consider it. wink

Grouch once said "I would never want to join a club that would accept me as a member"

11 Feb 2005

What Scandal, Davej, Mal, Gem, etc. said. How on earth could it be a problem?
Mike.

11 Feb 2005

Quote by Sarah1448
There was lots of mm and ff snogging at the Essex munch, I didn't hear anyone complaining, I think they were too busy watching

Damn - and I was too new and inexperienced to go wink

Well if Reese' comment is anything to go by - there will have been full glasses of wine all around then.
Back to the topic at hand though, as a bi-bloke with a long term (male) partner who is also bi there IS some degree of social stigma still atttached to the whole bloke on bloke thing in some walks of life. In the same way, many people will have an 'opinion' on the swinging community (for want of a better word) when really, they ain't got a f**king clue :!:
I think/know :wink: that this is what prompted FB's thread (that and the conversation we had earlier today on PM so yup, hands up, I'm the guilty party) surprised

Will the real gay couple please stand up... Hello :giveup: ... bi to be precise cool

I would like to add though that I've found this place refreshingly accepting by comparison to most/all of the gay/other sites that we've used in the past where people are sometimes extremely judgemental of others - albeit age, sex, sexual preference, body type (massive one!). Thank you.
See you at a munch soon with my (male) boyfriend! biggrin

We'll be the one's in pink lounge suits with matching poodles in the corner.. snogging!? :wink: :wink: FB - you're first in line for a snog and if yer really good you ca stroke the poodle too :P

11 Feb 2005

First in line - I should bloody think so you sod. :twisted: Is Poodle your pet name for the 'other half' then lol

Bev
xx

11 Feb 2005

Quote by Bloke2005
There was lots of mm and ff snogging at the Essex munch, I didn't hear anyone complaining, I think they were too busy watching

Damn - and I was too new and inexperienced to go wink

Well if Reese' comment is anything to go by - there will have been full glasses of wine all around then.
Back to the topic at hand though, as a bi-bloke with a long term (male) partner who is also bi there IS some degree of social stigma still atttached to the whole bloke on bloke thing in some walks of life. In the same way, many people will have an 'opinion' on the swinging community (for want of a better word) when really, they ain't got a f**king clue :!:
I think/know :wink: that this is what prompted FB's thread (that and the conversation we had earlier today on PM so yup, hands up, I'm the guilty party) surprised

Will the real gay couple please stand up... Hello :giveup: ... bi to be precise cool

I would like to add though that I've found this place refreshingly accepting by comparison to most/all of the gay/other sites that we've used in the past where people are sometimes extremely judgemental of others - albeit age, sex, sexual preference, body type (massive one!). Thank you.
See you at a munch soon with my (male) boyfriend! biggrin

We'll be the one's in pink lounge suits with matching poodles in the corner.. snogging!? :wink: :wink: FB - you're first in line for a snog and if yer really good you ca stroke the poodle too :P
Hello bloke2005 wave

Nice of you to step into the spotlight so to speak, you are right about the prejudice shown to male:male contact in many walks of life however I think most people on Swinging Heaven are much more accepting. :D
When you do make it to a munch I'll give you both a snog! kiss

Roger the Dragon.
P.S. Out of interest is the avatar pic of one of you?

11 Feb 2005

Roger just bugger off to the back of the queue. I saw him first OK? lol

Bev
xx

11 Feb 2005

Quote by freckledbird
This particular question has come from a recent exchange of words.
Just wondered what people's reaction would be if a gay couple turned up at a munch?
Would anyone be put off if a gay couple put themselves on the guest list?
We all know that munches are social and non-threatening events. I'm inclined to think that if a lesbian couple attended a munch, there would be many couples who would stand and chat with them (either just being friendly or trying to 'pull' them). Just made me wonder if the same people would be as inclined to chat with a male gay couple?
I know we'd chat to either, just as we would with anyone else there.
Please don't anyone be offended by this, it really is a genuine question and not meant to be divisive in any way. If you'd rather not post in the forum but want to say something then pm me by all means, it will stay in pm.
Bev
xx

A Munch is a social meeting, for conversation, so peopleâ€™s sexualities should not come into it, until that comes into conversation

11 Feb 2005

Quote by Sarah1448
There was lots of mm and ff snogging at the Essex munch, I didn't hear anyone complaining, I think they were too busy watching

LOL.........you obviously didn't hear Jiggle complaining when me, Dambuster and Marmalaid hijacked him and gave him a 4-way male-male snog.........lol

11 Feb 2005

:shock: :shock: :shock:
I missed that as well :cry:
Was I at the Essex munch or what?
Bev
xx

11 Feb 2005

Hi Bloke2005, wave

Hope to see you (and your fella) at a munch soon biggrin

Gem. x
ps, can I watch at the aftermunch party? I have a bit of a soft spot for bi guys :rascal: redface

Oooo I really must learn to behave! lol

11 Feb 2005

Quote by Bloke2005
Damn - and I was too new and inexperienced to go...

'was' being the operative word! Go and put your name down here at once!

11 Feb 2005

Quote by rogerthedragon
There was lots of mm and ff snogging at the Essex munch, I didn't hear anyone complaining, I think they were too busy watching

Damn - and I was too new and inexperienced to go wink

Well if Reese' comment is anything to go by - there will have been full glasses of wine all around then.
Back to the topic at hand though, as a bi-bloke with a long term (male) partner who is also bi there IS some degree of social stigma still atttached to the whole bloke on bloke thing in some walks of life. In the same way, many people will have an 'opinion' on the swinging community (for want of a better word) when really, they ain't got a f**king clue :!:
I think/know :wink: that this is what prompted FB's thread (that and the conversation we had earlier today on PM so yup, hands up, I'm the guilty party) surprised

Will the real gay couple please stand up... Hello :giveup: ... bi to be precise cool

I would like to add though that I've found this place refreshingly accepting by comparison to most/all of the gay/other sites that we've used in the past where people are sometimes extremely judgemental of others - albeit age, sex, sexual preference, body type (massive one!). Thank you.
See you at a munch soon with my (male) boyfriend! biggrin

We'll be the one's in pink lounge suits with matching poodles in the corner.. snogging!? :wink: :wink: FB - you're first in line for a snog and if yer really good you ca stroke the poodle too :P
Hello bloke2005 wave

Nice of you to step into the spotlight so to speak, you are right about the prejudice shown to male:male contact in many walks of life however I think most people on Swinging Heaven are much more accepting. :D
When you do make it to a munch I'll give you both a snog! kiss

Roger the Dragon.
P.S. Out of interest is the avatar pic of one of you?
Yes - the avatar pic is me (VERY good lighting mind) and Bev has seen the rest (the face!) as she's my SH mentor right now :P

11 Feb 2005

I enjoy making friends with people who appeal to me in a variety of ways, not because they are rich, well to do, intelligent, etc etc. and i think this applies to most of us in here, and hence why we all agree that someone sexual orientation is completely irrelevant for munches.
smile

11 Feb 2005

Quote by little gem
Hi Bloke2005,
Hope to see you (and your fella) at a munch soon

Gem. x
ps, can I watch at the aftermunch party? I have a bit of a soft spot for bi guys :rascal:
Oooo I really must learn to behave!

More than welcome to watch - I did offer to escort you out in Manchester on one of your threads last week but was sadly overlooked in the rush... surprised

ops:
Any time you need a chaperone... :P

11 Feb 2005

personaly i wouldn't have a problem with gay male or female couple or with gay or lesbians attending though
i would have a problem with narrowminded bigots attending and messing with the karma of a good munch
also idiots who attend believing that the on sure shag munches is cool

11 Feb 2005

Quote by rogerthedragon
Two men openly snogging in a bar should not be any more unacceptable than a heterosexual couple snogging. For a landlord to take offense would be completely unacceptable and I would hope unacceptable to the majority of Swinging Heaven members!

This argument has been going on for a very long time Roger and I'm not saying anything that isn't already being debated in the public domain..........I also believe it's the main driving force behind the Gay Pride movement. A landlord taking offence (or not) is completely out of our hands and there's a real possibility that it could happen.

Quote by rogerthedragon
Acceptable public behavior should be the same regardless of the gender or sexuality of the people concerned and I'm a little confused why you felt it necessary to bring this up.
Roger the Dragon.

The original post asked for people's opinions regarding others reactions if a gay couple turned up at a munch. I don't think anybody from here would be bothered by it in the slightest but different people do have different opinions on what acceptable behaviour in a public place should be and the Basil Fawlty landlords of this world would have a totally different opinion to ours. Should I have buried my head in the sand and ignored it or is it better to bring it out into the open?
Steve

11 Feb 2005

I do agree, Steve, that some Landlords would have a problem with men snogging each other in their pubs. But, I would hope that any munch organiser would make sure than the staff at any venue they chose for a munch were aware that a diverse crowd of open-minded people would be attending. I would say that any venue whose staff were closed-minded would not really be appropriate for an SH munch anyways.

11 Feb 2005

Quote by Bloke2005
Yes - the avatar pic is me (VERY good lighting mind) and Bev has seen the rest (the face!) as she's my SH mentor right now :P

:shock: Might prove to be a bad choice - I'm a gobby git and they don't like me confused

And you're lovely redface

11 Feb 2005

We wouldnt really care - orginally being from Brighton - most of our friends gay. The only time I could see anyone having problem with it (aside from being homophobic) is if you had advertised couples and bi fems only - maybe people would be a bit shocked in a way??? But I dont really see why....
Sini