Munches

20 Nov 2004

Quote by Steve_D
Just so you know (and I'm talking about the munches I organise, not all of them)
The munches are not a "free-for-all". If they were I would just post
"next london munch will be at ********* cya there"
Invites are sent out purely on a gut-feeling basis (we've seen what shit a written definition can cause in another thread)
I don't answer "why wasn't I invited pm's" for the simple reason that I don't always remember why a certain persons original request was deleted. It could be that they only just registered for the forum/chatroom. It could be something as simple as a couple of words that have struck a chord in their post/pm.
Other munch organisers will have different ways of doing things.
Steve

Ill agree with most of that,we all hav different ways of organising these things and to make them as enjoyable for all we have our own different rules.
What really bugged me and Steve were the people who just wouldnt take no for an answer mad

and started wingeing about it! rolleyes

We really tried our best for everyone to be able to come,and even had some people checked out who couldnt come because of our cut off date and i dont think people generally realise how much work goes into these things.
At the end of the day everyone that came to Notts had a great time,there was no trouble so therefore i thinkour rules were worth it and to the wingers :2fingers:

20 Nov 2004

We dont venture into the chatroom (technically WAY above our heads) but it's refreshing to know AND we fully understand and support the decision to restrict who attends the Munches.
We have our names down for a munch in March and are hopeful that we willl be accepted but we have made the effort to get to know a few people first. The thought of A free for all attendance honestly fills us with dread.
I dont think that those who just appear on the forum or the chat room can seriously expect to be invited with open arms. To do so would be foolish and inappropriate in our opinion for those who are looking to meet up with like minded people and not some drunken tosser or press reporter! (apologies to drunken tossers everywhere)
Just our thoughts and a big thank you to all the munch organisers everywhere wink

20 Nov 2004

Quote by LadyFeeBee
and not some drunken tosser or press reporter! (apologies to drunken tossers everywhere)
Just our thoughts and a big thank you to all the munch organisers everywhere

None taken redface

20 Nov 2004

The trouble with a free for all is that ANYONE could turn up. Even my dad!! Can't have that christ!!!!!!!!!!

20 Nov 2004

I would agree that there has to be attendance rules and those are best made by the organiser.
We would have liked to have gone to the Notts Munch but fully understand that, as even newer newbees than we are now, we didnâ€™t qualify under the cut off date for registering on the forum. This has to be in place to avoid the press and new chancers.
I would also recognise that a lot of effort and hassle has to go in to the organising of such events and that at the end of the day it is by invitation.
We hope to be invited to attend a munch in the near future
: smile

20 Nov 2004

Quote by LadyFeeBee
We have our names down for a munch in March and are hopeful that we willl be accepted

The Glasgow one? I'm down for that, hope to get along

Quote by LadyFeeBee
but we have made the effort to get to know a few people first.

For me, I'm hoping talking complete bollox counts as 'getting to know people' lol

20 Nov 2004

We are in the process of organising the Wigan Mini Munch and we have also had to turn away a few people, not because of anything in particular they have said or done but just cause something in their pm or post just didn't feel right. We did get a bit of advice from some people who had organised other munches and that was appreciated!
We have a few new people coming along to our munch but all of them have had regulars from the iste vouch for them as being genuine.
I certainly respect all you guys who have organised the larger munches and would not like to be organising anything bigger than the one we are doing which is only for a max of 70 people! Just hope I have remembered everything!
At the end of the day, the organisers have to set down some kind of rule who can and who cant be invited, and for myself this has sometimes just been down to a gut feeling!

20 Nov 2004

Quote by Steve_D
Just so you know (and I'm talking about the munches I organise, not all of them)
The munches are not a "free-for-all". If they were I would just post
"next london munch will be at ********* cya there"
Invites are sent out purely on a gut-feeling basis (we've seen what shit a written definition can cause in another thread)
I don't answer "why wasn't I invited pm's" for the simple reason that I don't always remember why a certain persons original request was deleted. It could be that they only just registered for the forum/chatroom. It could be something as simple as a couple of words that have struck a chord in their post/pm.
Other munch organisers will have different ways of doing things.
Steve

As you will have seen from the other thread this relates to, I fully agree with your reasons for allowing and not allowing people to attend your munches. No disagreement whatsoever. But all this furvour came about because folk weren't informed that they weren't invited and were in limbo, wondering if they had not been informed by accident. If they had made plans to be there, knowing they wouldn't get the info until the week before (which I also agree with), you can see why panic sets in when they don't hear anything.
Mal

20 Nov 2004

Quote by dambuster
and not some drunken tosser or press reporter! (apologies to drunken tossers everywhere)
Just our thoughts and a big thank you to all the munch organisers everywhere

None taken redface

Beat me to it lol

Venusxxx

20 Nov 2004

Quote by VenusnMars
Beat me to it
Venusxxx

Beat you. Never. Not my style. Sorry.
(could be persuaded other) :twisted:

20 Nov 2004

Quote by MQ
The trouble with a free for all is that ANYONE could turn up. Even my dad!! Can't have that christ!!!!!!!!!!

It's just nice to know you're having a good time sweetheart.
Love Dad kiss

20 Nov 2004

runs away traumatised and screaming!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :uhoh: bolt

20 Nov 2004

:evil2: :twisted: rotflmao

21 Nov 2004

Quote by MQ
runs away traumatised and screaming!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :uhoh:

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Bad Will smackbottom

21 Nov 2004

Clare_Lincs wrote:

Ill agree with most of that,we all hav different ways of organising these things and to make them as enjoyable for all we have our own different rules.
What really bugged me and Steve were the people who just wouldnt take no for an answer and started whingeing about it!
We really tried our best for everyone to be able to come,and even had some people checked out who couldnt come because of our cut off date and i dont think people generally realise how much work goes into these things.
At the end of the day everyone that came to Notts had a great time,there was no trouble so therefore i thinkour rules were worth it and to the whingers :2fingers:

Sorry I'm late - just seen this:
I think you were totally right Clare - you put a lot into the organisation, and the good time everyone had a the Nottm munch bears that out (or should I say bares that out :P :P).
Mike.

21 Nov 2004

Quote by MikeNorth
Clare_Lincs wrote:Ill agree with most of that,we all hav different ways of organising these things and to make them as enjoyable for all we have our own different rules.
What really bugged me and Steve were the people who just wouldnt take no for an answer and started whingeing about it!
We really tried our best for everyone to be able to come,and even had some people checked out who couldnt come because of our cut off date and i dont think people generally realise how much work goes into these things.
At the end of the day everyone that came to Notts had a great time,there was no trouble so therefore i thinkour rules were worth it and to the whingers :2fingers:

Sorry I'm late - just seen this:
I think you were totally right Clare - you put a lot into the organisation, and the good time everyone had a the Nottm munch bears that out (or should I say bares that out :P :P).
Mike.
Thanks kiss

Its good to be appreciated biggrin

21 Nov 2004

Quote by mal609
As you will have seen from the other thread this relates to, I fully agree with your reasons for allowing and not allowing people to attend your munches. No disagreement whatsoever. But all this furvour came about because folk weren't informed that they weren't invited and were in limbo, wondering if they had not been informed by accident. If they had made plans to be there, knowing they wouldn't get the info until the week before (which I also agree with), you can see why panic sets in when they don't hear anything.
Mal

Totally agree Mal. Although I can fully understand the feeling of a PM "not feeling right", and I fully appreciate what a big job organising a munch is - I am in no way trying to belittle the experience of the munch organisers. However, I think everyone who asks for an invite should get a quick PM, even if it just says "No thanks". It is basic politeness. The thing with munches is that people often travel great distances to get there and if they are left in limbo they have not got time to make travel/accomodation (etc) arrangements to get there. I can understand why people are angry about not being informed that they are not invited, and in fact in the instance that has sparked this thread, the uninvited were known on the forum, not total newbies.

21 Nov 2004

id just like to say that i missed that point in my tried really hard to let everyone who couldnt come know asap,i think we occasionally missed the odd one and didnt get back to them as soon as we shouldve redface

But i personally wouldnt like to be left hanging therefore i would let anyone else know as soon as i could!

21 Nov 2004

I think the munch organisers do a fantastic job and it is difficult to organise a function.
It is a private function after all and the people who whinge, you must respect the organisers wishes and except that they may not CURRENTLY be eligible to attend.
Id like to thank everyone who who has taken a gamble on me and have allowed me to attend the munches and parties, but to the whingers and noobies, :i had to prove i was worth the risk !!!!!:
To the munch and party organisers remember,
YOU CAN'T PLEASE ALL THE PEOPLE ALL THE TIME
KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

21 Nov 2004

So, you're saying that you would have posted this thread:

Quote by Steve_D
Just so you know (and I'm talking about the munches I organise, not all of them)
The munches are not a "free-for-all". If they were I would just post
"next london munch will be at ********* cya there"
Invites are sent out purely on a gut-feeling basis (we've seen what shit a written definition can cause in another thread)
I don't answer "why wasn't I invited pm's" for the simple reason that I don't always remember why a certain persons original request was deleted. It could be that they only just registered for the forum/chatroom. It could be something as simple as a couple of words that have struck a chord in their post/pm.
Other munch organisers will have different ways of doing things.
Steve

... if this thread had never have been posted?
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/27708.html
Look, I'm not going to argue about this. The point is that people who ask for invites to munches, parties, and any other organised event at least deserve a "no thanks". No hidden agenda, and just my personal opinion. Period.
rolleyes

21 Nov 2004

Hm- should I re-open old wounds here???--
Shortly after signing up to 'swinging heaven' I posted a thred ref 'being accepted' etc, one of the common themes in the replies we got was to 'get along to a munch'- which we tried to do, only to be turned down- we then 'whinged' ie- asked why this was, to be pointed in the direction of the edited version of the original munch post, which stated a 'cutoff' date- which we had just missed. Accepting this I left it as was- then noticed that that despite the 'cutoff' date, certain other couples had got invites despite being newer than us- so we 'whinged' again, ie-asked about this anomaly- then got flamed in threads and called 'whingers'.
Yes I understand that there are rules etc- but rather than 'going off on one' at people that would simply like to join in and ask 'why not?' when refused, how about some hard and fast rules when first posting a munch??
At the moment we wait with baited breath to see if Steph will allow us to go to the valentines munch, which brings an etiquette question to mind- should I also pm her?- or wait for her reply??
We both would really love to 'get to a munch', cant wait to meet some of the loonies and slappers we've 'met' on here,we've already formed 'embryonic' relationships with certain people and would love to put faces to names, but it seems a very hard next step--

21 Nov 2004

Well if i remember correctly there were some questions raised about people who were after the cut off date but were allowed to come to Notts,they were people who had been vouched for by others or who we knew some that may appear new on the forums may have been on the chatroom for some funny how you end up repeating yourself on these things isnt it?? dunno

Coz im sure that this was all fully explained god knows how many times before!!!

21 Nov 2004

Thats fine- no problem with it- but if these things were known at day one- you wouldnt think we're 'whingers' and we wouldnt think we're hated by people who dont even know us--
So when we do meet-whos going to smackbottom

who???

21 Nov 2004

Quote by Kenluvslucy
Thats fine- no problem with it- but if these things were known at day one- you wouldnt think we're 'whingers' and we wouldnt think we're hated by people who dont even know us--
So when we do meet-whos going to who???

I cant remember anyone calling you wingers??
Everyone who organises munches has different criteria as to who can attend and why so i guess its up to them individually

21 Nov 2004

You didnt- its been inferred tho- anyway Clare, I can sense Misschiefs finger hovering- did I tell you that you look stunning in your new(ish) avatar- you really are a gorgeous lady--
(quick, grab me ankles. Im dissapearing)

21 Nov 2004

Quote by Kenluvslucy
You didnt- its been inferred tho- anyway Clare, I can sense Misschiefs finger hovering- did I tell you that you look stunning in your new(ish) avatar- you really are a gorgeous lady--
(quick, grab me ankles. Im dissapearing)

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: So were trying the arse licking tactics now eh?? lol

21 Nov 2004

Quote by Clare_Lincs
Its funny how you end up repeating yourself on these things isnt it?? Coz im sure that this was all fully explained god knows how many times before!!!

OOps I wasn't aware of the reasons either, the cut off date threw me as I thought that was kinda a set rule regardless of being vouched redface

21 Nov 2004

Quote by MISSCHIEF
Its funny how you end up repeating yourself on these things isnt it?? Coz im sure that this was all fully explained god knows how many times before!!!

OOps I wasn't aware of the reasons either, the cut off date threw me as I thought that was kinda a set rule regardless of being vouched redface

Nope there was quite a few peeps who got on the list only because we'd spent time getting people to vouch for them,not an easy task!!

21 Nov 2004

Quote by Clare_Lincs
You didnt- its been inferred tho- anyway Clare, I can sense Misschiefs finger hovering- did I tell you that you look stunning in your new(ish) avatar- you really are a gorgeous lady--
(quick, grab me ankles. Im dissapearing)

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: So were trying the arse licking tactics now eh?? lol

Of course-Im a bloke.

21 Nov 2004

In my opinion, it's up to the organiser to determine the invitation criteria. It should be fairly obvious that almost any venue will be restrictive of numbers and preference will inevitably be given to people who are known on the site. I don't see any way to avoid that.
If the Munch that I'm thinking about organising next summer (see: "A Munch At The Races" in the meet-up forum) goes ahead, invites will be sent to established SH members who ask to be invited, on a first come first served basis.
What does 'established' mean? From my admittedly arbitrary POV as a potential Munch organiser, it means someone who has introduced themself and made an effort to join in, but everyone who organises a Munch will have their own criteria.
Munches are, essentially, private parties and it's entirely up to the host to decide who gets invited. Having said that, from my own experience of being invited to my first Munch as a virtual unknown (Thank you Heather kiss

), I think they're a fantastic opportunity to help new people get into the swing of things (excuse the deliberate pun) and I personally wouldn't set a cut off on grounds of seniority or whether I know someone who wants to attend.
Ice