Must be clean!

1 Dec 2005

I was reading a post in LMUâ€¦
Looking to meet..( blar blar blar ) â€¦. must be clean. rolleyes

Me being me, I just could not resist replying something along the lines ofâ€¦
You wonâ€™t get clean here - we are all dirty. :twisted:
My reply was obviously prompted by a â€˜dumb statementâ€™ alert in my head. However it was not until sometime after and considering the reply they gave, explaining they did not want someone with AIDS, that a truly realised just how dumb it was.
You must be cleanâ€¦..
Would they know if the person wasnâ€™t â€˜cleanâ€˜?
Would an â€˜uncleanâ€™ think â€œDamn, better look somewhere elseâ€ ?
Would they sue for breach of contract if their meet turned out to be â€˜uncleanâ€™?
They only commented about AIDS - would a regular STI be OK?
Does adding that statement really make any bloody difference? dunno

It is a bit like the other statement I chuckle at when I see it â€¦ â€œmust be discreetâ€.
Do blabber mouths get frustrated by thatâ€¦. â€œbugger, I better not reply to that one they want a discreet personâ€
What dumb-ass comments make you chuckle when you see them in ads?

1 Dec 2005

what about the ones that say.... we only do safe sex till we trust you?
yeah, cos these STI riddled peeps always blurt it out after a few meets! rolleyes

1 Dec 2005

Yes i saw that one too Pololady............another thing used in ads that stands out as well is when they say they are genuine......i mean thats obvious....so if they are not geniune do they say "non-genuine person here looking to waste your time".

1 Dec 2005

I always wonder about the people that say "must be discreet" - then look at their pic and think, well their ain't many people own a bedcover like that!!! :undecided:

1 Dec 2005

One thing I've noticed is the many couples who are looking for one person: "that elusive bi-female" ....no, not that one, that one. lol

1 Dec 2005

what about, not into "hardened" swingers?
cos all these people must be thinking to themselves.. "yeah, i have no life outside swinging, best not reply to these casual swingers"

1 Dec 2005

Quote by well_busty_babe
what about, not into "hardened" swingers?

Must be the same ones looking for the bi-female and not single guys lol

1 Dec 2005

Makes us laugh when you see consectutive adverts from the same people saying totally different things, noticed one today;
first one was....blah blah blah......we are softswingers keep ultimate for ourselves.
immediatly followed by another advert from same people......blah blah blah..........full swap, same or seperate rooms.
Perhaps they had their first full swap in the 20 seconds before posting the second add? lol

John & Shel

1 Dec 2005

Many many moons ago, we got talking to a cpl ( as ya do) who were quite simply, the biggest idiots who had ever walked this fair and pleasant land of ours.
Convo went something like...blah blah blah blah full swap, fem don't like condoms but you must be able to provide proof of a recent g.u. test.
I mean, WTF ? ?
Needless to say the convo did not develope into a meet lol

1 Dec 2005

Quote by sleazy
Many many moons ago, we got talking to a cpl ( as ya do) who were quite simply, the biggest idiots who had ever walked this fair and pleasant land of ours.
Convo went something like...blah blah blah blah full swap, fem don't like condoms but you must be able to provide proof of a recent g.u. test.
I mean, WTF ? ?
Needless to say the convo did not develope into a meet lol

Gum test .. well didn't you produce your pack of wrigleys for em then ... tut tut sleazy
DD rotflmao

1 Dec 2005

I like the ones that say...
"would like to meet a professional gentleman/lady"
I always wonder what profession you have to be in to reply......and if they mean "the oldest profession".
Surely that's against site rules?
:P

1 Dec 2005

Personally im against the ones that say no single!!!
How dare folk be so blatantly rude as to tell me to find a girlfriend or get married!!!

1 Dec 2005

New and improved.
New AND improved - how do you do that then, it's either new or improved, it can't be both.
Oh hang on... *re reads thread* just ignore me, I'm getting all giddy at the prospect of my munch cherry popping on Saturday... :cheers:

1 Dec 2005

Hi we are a couple of filthy blabber-mouths looking to meet an non-genuine couple who have no standards of cleanliness and probably carrying a sexually transmitted disease.
We would be expecting full swap - that is I have your missus and the two women can play with eachother but the other male can wait in the hotel bar. Must be prepared to tell the world about what we get up to and happy for us to do the same. No protection will be required as we beleive you and I am sure you don't doubt us for one minute. Finally the female of this couple must be prepared to meet me (the male) to test out your oral skills before we meet as couples.
All replies won't be answered as I don't want the wife seeing any from hunky males.
We are 74% genuine - genuine what, you will find out later.

1 Dec 2005

I'm just popping back to change my add,
biggrin

:D :D :D

1 Dec 2005

On another site, there was a thread about people's preferences...and there were all the usual replies, including some from couples who highly rated MMF 3-somes amongst their other things that they were into...
...except that these couples specified "no single males" in their adverts and made it quite clear that they only "do" couples. Just how you do MMF in a couples only sitation without being blatantly rude to the "other" female? I don't know. confused

1 Dec 2005

Partyman,
In those threesome situations Shel normally just gets on with her knitting, had a couple of beautiful FairIsle Jumpers from long sessions and a nice tanktop from a quickey!!
John & Shel

1 Dec 2005

its not a joke really though, you do get couples looking for a couple who play only as a single fem!
we have had couples email us asking for a meet for a 4some, where i am supposed to play with the fem and the other guy, but the other fem only plays with her own partner!
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm can imagine tonguey is gonna consider THAT a worthwhile journey! rolleyes

1 Dec 2005

Quote by partyman
On another site, there was a thread about people's preferences...and there were all the usual replies, including some from couples who highly rated MMF 3-somes amongst their other things that they were into...
...except that these couples specified "no single males" in their adverts and made it quite clear that they only "do" couples. Just how you do MMF in a couples only sitation without being blatantly rude to the "other" female? I don't know.

We always say couples only in public on-line. What we do in a club might be very different though. I would suspect that their adverts are a way of avoiding countless e-mails and that they do the searching when they look for a guy for MMF.

1 Dec 2005

Quote by Geordiecpl2001
Partyman,
In those threesome situations Shel normally just gets on with her knitting, had a couple of beautiful FairIsle Jumpers from long sessions and a nice tanktop from a quickey!!
John & Shel

:lol: :lol:
You'll need them as well this winter, you'd better get your diary filled with more sexy encounters so that you can wrap up nice and warm til the Spring comes round biggrin

1 Dec 2005

Quote by well_busty_babe
its not a joke really though, you do get couples looking for a couple who play only as a single fem!
we have had couples email us asking for a meet for a 4some, where i am supposed to play with the fem and the other guy, but the other fem only plays with her own partner!
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm can imagine tonguey is gonna consider THAT a worthwhile journey!

I see couples like that all the time at the clubs (now nicknamed "rucksack couples" as guy plays all he wants while his woman huggs the guys back, in classic "don't touch me" body language) Crazy thing is, that this kind of behaviour is tollerated by couples, who would chuck a fit at the sight of a "genuine" single guy.

2 Dec 2005

Must be discreet... preference will be given to people who have met other couples we know.
Hmmmmmmm should I tell them who I have met and see if they know any - damn then I won't be being discreet - bollocks, catch 22 confused

2 Dec 2005

where people ask for drug/disease free people !! whats that about confused

:
your not going to turn up expecting a shag, smoking a crack pipe with your knob dripping puss :cry:
the beauty of this site is that no 2 people are the same, i just cannot understand anyone narrowing down their options, surely we are all after the same thing ?? fun and friendship.....

2 Dec 2005

Quote by 34fun
i just cannot understand anyone narrowing down their options

There was an ad in Women seeking Men just yesterday "cannot accommodate or travel" :confused:
Well that certainly narrows her options down ........... to nothing! :undecided:

2 Dec 2005

Quote by 34fun
i just cannot understand anyone narrowing down their options, surely we are all after the same thing ?? fun and friendship.....

Just as in RL there are types of people you are naturally drawn to. People will have some form of preference - some more than others. I understand with couples letting other people into their sex lives, they will have their own personal boundaries...
some only want to meet for annonimous one-off sex with other people, some only soft swing, some want same room, some want to split up, some hubbies just want to watch and so on. To a slightly lesser degree, the same can be said for singles. With time people get to know what they like and what they don't and can reduce disappointment by specifying their preferences....
No smokers
No watersports
No pain
No huge cocks
Same room sex only
Full swap
Playing but no penetration
No cameras
The list of acceptable requests goes on...
If you are still wondering why people narrow down their options, just imagine a couple turning up to meet you and the 25 stone wife gets the ropes and chains out of the bag labelled "PAIN", whilst the hubby starts pissing on you as he sets up the video recorder. lol

Stating expectations also reduces the chances of nasty feelings swelling up after the fact. For example, if one person wanted to find people to meet on a regular basis to go to parties with and the other just got their kicks having one-off encounters. If both parties are initially open and honest about what they are looking for it will save a lot of trouble in the long run.
But there are some things that are just bloody pointlessto ask for - as it is unlikely the responding party would admit to such a trait.

2 Dec 2005

Quote by Missy
Women seeking Men just yesterday "cannot accommodate or travel" :confused:

I like that one lol

2 Dec 2005

Quote by 34fun
your not going to turn up expecting a shag, smoking a crack pipe with your knob dripping puss :cry:

:lol: :lol:
Dogging ads that say "can accommodate" .... 'nuff said rolleyes

Any ad that says "hung guy" makes me giggle, I don't like my meat "gamey" :shock:

2 Dec 2005

Quote by Serendipity
Any ad that says "hung guy"

May be they were a pirate or a highway man confused

2 Dec 2005

ohhh pololady i'm so glad you did this thread cause i read some guys add in the chat room yesterday and there was a comment on it that left me gob smacked and been dieing to tell someone
its said
safe sex a must unless the lady insists otherwise
WTF :shock:

2 Dec 2005

Quote by naughtynymphos1
ohhh pololady i'm so glad you did this thread cause i read some guys add in the chat room yesterday and there was a comment on it that left me gob smacked and been dieing to tell someone
its said
safe sex a must unless the lady insists otherwise
WTF :shock:

That is down right irresponsible - he needs to add "no unclean crack-whores" :lol: