I have been to a few sex clubs, and most have had a similar set up when it comes to the play areas including lockable private rooms. However, I went to a club that didn't have any private rooms. They said you can't lock a door for safety reasons in case something happens in there and one of the people involved can't get out. Ok fair enough, we don't need to "lock" the door, but atleast be able to shut it as an indication that the individuals in there want privacy. The owner's response to that was:"Private Rooms, are against the Ethos of Real have areas where you can lock doors to play but these areas are viewable through mirrored windows."
I am struggling to see how being watched is part of the ethos or a requirement? Isn't it about being comfortable with what you're doing? And if I want to join a couple but feel self-conscious about people standing there watching me, I am no longer a swinger, or the couple for that matter..
I feel like what they're saying is that I am being a bit of a hypocrite if I say I like to perv and watch people but when it comes to me, I'd rather go private. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for flirting and being playful in open spaces and yeah sometimes I have engaged with someone infront of others. But sometimes, I am not in that frame of mind and would rather focus solely on what I'm doing/being done to me rather than on the fact that I am putting on a show for someone..
Thoughts?..
Any club I have been to none of the doors have locks on them, but if they are closed they stay closed till the people in the room open the door again.
One club has a room with door and a mirror, but there is avery clear notice to those in the room that the mirror is there and others may see in, and if you are not happy please use one of the rooms upstairs.
M1ssvery I would be going to another club!
It is a real shame, because besides that, it's quite a nice wee club. Handy to me, lovely people there, good size(the club that is) but the one time I played there I found myself finding the furthest darkest corner possible and asking my partner to "block the view" siigh. A friend of mine who frequents it with her boyfriend said she feels very self conscious as well there and tries to hide behind people..
I'm surprised that not enough people have mentioned this to the owners for them to do something about it.. Obviously it's not something that's affecting business..
Cant lock the lock the door coz its elf and safety mate! cobblers. We use a popular club that has lockable rooms and actually has panic buttons in them. So it's your choice. They work too as we found out be accident one Saturday evening. Surely the point is you do what you want, with whom you want and were you want! if that is in public view then fine, if in private fine. Irony is, if it the club I am thinking it is, we were once told to "get a room" as a bit of a joke. What's the bloody point when they ain't got locks on the doors.
Being watched is nothing specifically to do with swinging. You can swing in private or you can have sex with a partner in public or any combination. The person who said that to you is an idiot and DOES NOT understand swinging. That club is clearly a free-porn club and not for swingers.
I could not join in anything with 'watchers' unless they got naked too and were also joining in.
I think clubs should have the option of lockable rooms. I often go to a club in nw, that has both open play areas and lockable rooms, some with viewing areas some without.
I think this works best as some people may be uncomfortable knowing that they are being watched...tho I like others like being watched and watching.
One of those tricky issues at the heart of a specific swinging setting this. People will have different but perfectly justified views, all ways.
Broadly speaking we feel a club setting is a public arena and should promote a libertarian ethos with many conventional social rules left at the door. Unfortunately many make the mistake of creating a whole new set of rules which can be somewhat stifling. They should be places where people look to escape the conventions and seek to explore beyond the inhibitions.
We have grown to enjoy being watched/observed but not so keen on being gawped at. The difference being, a connection and understanding of the moment. We love to share that moment with those that understand it. We think Xtasia have got it right of the clubs we have been to with their lockable rooms but with a discrete line of mirrors at the apex of wall and ceiling. Perfect for keeping a distance but enough to make the connection.
Must admit that fellow guests slipping into closed private rooms always strikes us as very anti-social but take the point that others might want privacy. But fundamentally feel that those people might be suited to doing their swinging in the sanctuary of their own bedroom!
We've only ever been to one club, and then only once. We will be going again. We found having sex in public absolutely exhilerating, and I don't remember in any detail watching anyone, there were some watchers, and indeed we were watchers between bouts so as to say. With this rather limited experience I can say firmly that I'd only want to be in public, we just loved all the shagging all around us and our sex life in the week that followed the visit was horny as hell and constantly wanted.
I'd just use another club.
My dear old dad use to say "Never go anywhere without a pop up tent, you never know when you might need one!" until now I never understood what he meant .....
if you cant lock the door take ya money elsewhere.
