My change of status

13 Jan 2007

Some noticed my "I don't play" sig disappearing...
Well sadly I have decided that my marriage wasn't doing me nor my wife any good. We gave it our best and even seeked outside help several times but there's a time when you have to accept the facts.
I'm getting divorced.
Emotionally I'm likely to be a mindfield - so I'm still not likely to play but I'll start enjoying myself by going to socials and munches smile

I would like to thank all of those that have given me their support (some spending many hours!) - sorry things haven't turned out the way some had hoped.
And a big thanks goes to a very special friend for their support, for helping me to rebuild my self esteem and for giving me hope for the future. All this without even meeting me! What an angel! kiss

36 x

13 Jan 2007

36 hun I dont know what to say but I wish you luck kiss

13 Jan 2007

Quote by 36openminded
.........Well sadly I have decided that my marriage wasn't doing me nor my wife any good. We gave it our best and even seeked outside help several times but there's a time when you have to accept the facts.
I'm getting divorced.
Emotionally I'm likely to be a mindfield - so I'm still not likely to play but I'll start enjoying myself by going to socials and munches

Sorry to read this 36.
I know how it feels as I'm mid-divorce at the moment after finally separating last June.
Took me a while but things are brighter now & Munch No.2 is tomorrow (no , I mean today!!!) :bounce:
I hope you start enjoying yourself real soon.
All the best :cheers:

13 Jan 2007

Quote by varca
Hope that all works out for you 36 I took the same decision 2 years ago. Life is far too short to spend it unhappily.. life is what you make it!!! :)

I could have wrote this myself,and altho at first it was hard i know now it was the best way forward. best of luck to you and yours :kiss:
Nicky

13 Jan 2007

**

13 Jan 2007

I hope you have all the friends you need around you hun, good luck and chin up
Mar xxxx

13 Jan 2007

:therethere:
:cheers confused

??

13 Jan 2007

Been there and I'm back there currently... sad

Feel for you mate.
It gets better in time.
Glad to hear you are getting plenty of support.

13 Jan 2007

Never an easy decision for any one to make or to come to terms with after trying hard to resolve the issues.
Agree with kfn it does take time.. Been a solo now for 12 years and it took me quite a few to rediscover myself.
Mind look where I have ended up rotflmao

:smile2:

13 Jan 2007

36 have read a few of your posts in the past and you seem a level headed guy, at times some relationships and even marriages reach a point where you just cant go on anymore for one or both persons happiness, because over the course of time people, their priorities and even there personalities change, at least you have had the courage to call it a day and not live in an unhappy situation for the rest of your life !
We wish you well amigo, and start ebjoying the opportunities the new lease of life will provide, look in the bright side and as obi wan kenobi said avoid the dark side, it will only bring you unhappiness!! wink

All the best!! Mr an Miss SRNE..xx

13 Jan 2007

Hi 36, im glad your still keeping a good head and not rushing into having meets while you still emotional about the whole situation. Its a good idea to go to a few munches/socials. You are a nice guy and youve made a few friends here. kiss

Good luck.
Louise xx

13 Jan 2007

going through same thing at the moment after 18yrs, i have found the last 2 months extremley hard high and lows mostly lows.
try to keep things amicable as possible especially if you have kids, im haveing to hold back my emotions because of what my ex is doing with things like the house and the car.
you are not alone mate theres plenty of poeple here for you to lean on :cheers:

13 Jan 2007

Hun I (Sara) read your profile and you sound like a really nice genuine sane!!! guy.
I went through the same as you 5 years ago, and though it was hard at the time, it all worked out for the best. Life is too short to be miserable all the time.
I met Gra and we havent looked back.
Really wish you all the best in the future Im sure it will all work out for you.
Take care
Sara xx

13 Jan 2007

36, At least you will be able to move on, knowing that you tried your very best and i think thats about all anyone can give.
As others have said, glad you are going to take things slow, jumping right in to the melting pot wont do you any favours in the long run.
You have made friends here and people do think about you, i think like most, we would be honoured to meet you at a munch and share a drink wink

Times will probably get worse before you are out of the woods, so remember your reasons and that you did try.
We both wish you luck and happiness hun :therethere: kiss

13 Jan 2007

Sorry to hear this 36 :therethere:
but am wondering something about this because of the sig change more than anything else...
do you think the necessity of divorce has in some way come about from your presence & involvement here? I would assume that to call an end to your marriage there are other, more significant 'issues' within the relationship than the sex?
I'm not asking you to post an answer, I dont think its any of our business - but I wanted to ask in order to make you think wink

This thread might be worth another read: http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/84507.html and I need to say that if being here and the temptations & possibilities that stem from that are a primary factor or nail in the coffin in the ending of your marriage...have a rethink :wink:
But, if the love is completely gone, the relationship is making you both unhappy and you truly have decided, 100%, that the marriage is dead, there's nothing there for you anymore and you want out, then have one of these >> :therethere: and best wishes for the future kiss

13 Jan 2007

:shock: well 36 m8 im looking forward to meeting you wink

chin up see you soon :wink:

13 Jan 2007

See, you have so much support here and so many friends yet to meet and be made.
You did a brave thing and you have a better life to look forward `re going to be fine.
Big big hugs babe, you know where I am when you need to talk.
kiss

13 Jan 2007

I hope the future holds better things for both of you hun. kiss

14 Jan 2007

Only just seen this 36. I know it's been a tough decision for you to take and wish you both well in the future hun.
Love
Fire xx

14 Jan 2007

having never found anyone good enough to marry, i have never tried it, so i really cant begin to imagine what you are going through, im sorry things have come to this, and hope things will be sorted amicably, so that you can both move on

14 Jan 2007

gosh,
I am sorry. I hope you both find what you need/want/desire.
Singledom is actually great... and I can recommend it.
have fun babe...smile, laugh and keep upbeat.
x x x x x

14 Jan 2007

36, not sure what to say but hope you find true happiness.
pink x

14 Jan 2007

ending a marriage is a very hard and painful thing to do, but if its not working for you both why spend the rest of you life unhappy, i have been single 5 yrs nearly now and divorced last year. it does get easier
you have made lots of friends here and will get a lot of support from people, i hope you other half has a similar support network you will both need it.
good luck to you both
Earthy xx

14 Jan 2007

36 Hope you all the best and i would certainly recomneded the munches
:thumbup:

14 Jan 2007

The hardest thing for me was actually admitting to myself that no matter what I tried there was nothing I could do to save my marriage, and boy did I try a lot of things first. It's a bloody difficult decision to make but once you are sure that there's nothing left to salvage then you have to move on, probably for your own peace of mind. I livedfor 5 years trying to make it work and only making myself more and more miserable and since I cut those ties I haven't been happier.
Good luck to you both for the future