Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login

my husband has said he wants me to go with a black guy!!

last reply
44 replies
2.7k views
0 watchers
0 likes
my husband mentioned a while back he wants to see me with a black guy....have any other wifes had this? if so what did they do? im confused and unsure what to do...i love him and would love to fulfil his fantasy but have never really had any attraction to black guys.....he has shown me some pics of guys some are very nice some arent....i have told him if i did do it there would need to be a pyhsical attraction
Quote by Kaznkev
somewhere below has read and enjoyed the novels of jane austen

Bugger thats me out then :upset:
Quote by Kaznkev
somewhere below has read and enjoyed the novels of jane austen

Bugger thats me out then :upset:
And thats the only reason ,honest!
I know you are sooo tempted smile
Quote by brucie
this thread makes me feel very uneasy.

Why is that?
As everyone here will tell you it's your choice not his. That's the really important bit.
But I think it's fair to say to one's partner what it is you might want to see them do. Fantasies should be able to be brought up and the other partner should be able to think about the suggestion at their own speed. Give it a while to play around in your mind and you may enjoy whatever is suggested. First reactions may not last. I bet most of the people here came slowly not suddenly to their lifestyle.
I doubt if nagging or pressure works and if he keeps on about it tell him to back off.
As to black guys, they are guys like anyone else, some are nice, some may well be pains. If you are comfy with him watching you with another man then a black guy is just another guy with the visual pleasure of two skin colours. Shop around and pick someone you like just as you would with any other bloke. I'm sure there are plenty of ladies here who'd be happy to pass on recommendations wink
Tell him you'll think about it if he does it first and ask him why he's carrying pics of black guys around wink
If you want to do it then do it
If you dont want to do it then dontdo it
Quote by brucie
also choosing someone on teh basis of their skin colour is inherintly racist (as opposed to saying "ooh i find dark skinned men really really sexy"). smacks of the same sort of wrongness as fantasies.

I wouldn't say its racist in any way, just a preference, no different to preffering people based on shape or any other attribute.
Mixed race swinging can hold a fantasy side for many, and that is fine. The important thing must be, race and colour to one side, is that it is some thing that you wish to be part of.
I do not swing at all, I just love to watch the wife with other men, and the choice of male rest,s purly with her. If she is not having fun, then neither am I.
Hope this helps
Tell him you wanna see him with a black man first!
biggrin
Quote by brucie
its fine for her to fancy a black man. thats preference. but for him to want to see her getting fucked by a black man comes from sinister places.

I dont think its sinister at all...
Perhaps he wants to see her with a guy who has a big cock (and lets face it black guys on the whole do seem to be larger than white guys judging from the pictures I have seen here) or perhaps he would like to see the contrast of her white skin against the guys black skin......I have seen that mentioned many times before as one of the turn ons for people who actively seek black guys in preference to white guys.....
This comes in two elements.
First. The fantasy of seeing one's wife with a black guy - if you have never done this before I can understand it. It's new, different and there is a long history of this particular fantasy. Black guys are one of my preferences, but then so are tall guys and, ahem, women. So there you go - one of the many preferences around. No harm in that at all. What you will find, if you head down that way, is that there are nice (black) guys and not so nice (black) guys. Insert any description in the brackets and it will still hold true. I'm sure you will find that colour becomes less and less important compared to personality.
Second. This idea of (and I'm reading betwen the lines here) "I'm very unsure about it - but I don't want to disappoint my husband." If you feel unsure about anything on here DON'T DO IT! If you feel pressured into it, you will feel bad about yourself and him later on. If this is a theme of a relationship, then the relationship needs a long hard look at.
I can see why Brucie is uncomfortable with this thread. It worries me too - not the black guy with wife thing - the feeling pressured and out of your confort zone thing.
But, my final point - promise, black guys are just GUYS. And plenty of them on here are absolutely lovely. biggrin:D:D:D:D:D:D:D The myth about cock-size is mostly a myth, and isn't important with a good lover.
Wot foxy sed
Quote by Kaznkev
You fuck who you want

If you have to be coerced or convinced then that's wrong, and you need to talk to your husband who probably really thinks you'd love it because it's his fantasy - honesty is needed here. Nothing wrong with any fantasy so long as everyone's happy and eager, and no-one is being exploited. In this scenario, it feels like you'd just be doing it to please your partner - that's not a recipie for a fulfilling experience.
Maybe you should remind him of the saying:
"Once you've tried black, you'll never go back!"
;-)
Quote by Cubes
Maybe you should remind him of the saying:
"Once you've tried black, you'll never go back!"
;-)

Or once you have tried goth, you will never go... er... with a moth?
Once you've tried Tosh, you'll need a good wash.
No, that one won't work redface
Quote by gothicpunk
Maybe you should remind him of the saying:
"Once you've tried black, you'll never go back!"
;-)

Or once you have tried goth, you will never go... er... with a moth?
once you go goth you end up full of froth????
i can feel a whole new thread coming on here biggrin
Firstly I'd check your profile because either you've made up your mind real quick or your partner has gone ahead and started advertising for you.
As for the going black concept, yes I can see the racist arguement, but only if you are viewing it in a detremental way ie viewing black men as less than any other man and getting off on your wife roughing it with them.
(Sorry but could not find any real PC way of saying that without offending.)
However I would love to have sex with a lady of indian origin, am I racist or is it that i find the skin colour sexually attractive and so it turns me on. A bit like men liking blondes brunnetts redheads.
There is the big dick thing too but personally I think mostly it comes down to the guy getting turned on by interacial sex, lets face it we are not a 50/50 split in this country and so seeing you wife with a guy of different skin colour is a rarity and so can be a turn on.
Either way you should only do what you arehappy to do surely thats the differnece between concenting sex and coersion
Its funny but when ever we start chatting to a potential male he always asks "so, how did you talk her in to it"? Like I had to MAKE her do it. Strange.
Quote by Skydiver71
my husband mentioned a while back he wants to see me with a black guy....have any other wifes had this? if so what did they do? im confused and unsure what to do...i love him and would love to fulfil his fantasy but have never really had any attraction to black guys.....he has shown me some pics of guys some are very nice some arent....i have told him if i did do it there would need to be a pyhsical attraction

Seems to me you have already said what you think. Unsure and confused and don't know what to do! Talk to hubby and tell him.
Quote by Kaznkev
Maybe you should remind him of the saying:
"Once you've tried black, you'll never go back!"
;-)

Or once you have tried goth, you will never go... er... with a moth?
once you tried kaz youll never use daz biggrin
who is daz and what makes you think your better than him ?? :D
oh and....
once you try leathered you will be bound and tethered smile
...go where?
lp
Quote by __random_orbit__
...go where?
lp

I was thinking along the same lines. He wants you out?
You need a suitcase.
...on wheels.
Pimp My Case.
lp
If you want to do it then do it
If you dont want to do it then dont do it
I think it really is as simple as that,if your not happy about it,don't do it,your hubby should respect your decision
I think maybe we need to think about the fact that she *wants* to do it, but that the drive to do so is in order to fulfil his fantasy, rather than her own desire to sleep with a black guy.
talking about racism / personal taste is a little "not the point".
Has anyone else noticed the OP hasn't been back to comment further....
Quote by Kaznkev
probaly ran off with the black guy lol

:laughabove::laughabove: